


The Corruption We Suffer

by The_Dragon_Hearted



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Dream SMP Fandom, Minecraft (Video Game), mcyt
Genre: ANGST~, Abuse, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Calm down people it ends well, Did I Mention Angst?, Dream is a manipulative chaotic godling, Drista is a chaotic god and you cannot convince me otherwise, Drowning, Emotional Manipulation, Hurt/Comfort, Isolation, Just all the bad things guys, Multi, PTSD, Phil looses his wings at one point, Philza is also a god - kinda, Platonic Relationships, SBI family!, So much angst, Techno's voices, There's a lot of hurt, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, This could be considered whump at this point, Tommy gets a Dream mask, VillainInnit!, Vomiting, angsttttttt, blood/fighting, clingy duo, language (Bad would not approve), no actual suicide, protective sbi, reference to suicide, these kids need therapy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-11
Updated: 2021-03-12
Packaged: 2021-03-15 19:34:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 20
Words: 143,541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28694034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Dragon_Hearted/pseuds/The_Dragon_Hearted
Summary: In a post-apocalyptic future of dimensions and worlds plagued by monstrosities and mutations, the dwindling population of humanity has adapted and evolved but this is not without consequence.Dream, a godling, has made so many sacrifices for his power that he's found himself with nothing left to lose. It is then that he turns to Tommy in an attempt to twist the boy into something like his own image. The only one aware of the abuse is a young forgetful halfbreed who has no chance should he choose to stand against Dream - but that doesn't stop Ranboo. People matter and Tommy is one of the best humans he's ever met.Philza, an ancient survivor gifted with divine rights, refuses to let another one of his boys get twisted by the masked monster and will fight with all his life to keep him safe.Technoblade just wants a nice retirement, but apparently, that's too much to ask for.Meanwhile, below the earth, a cluster of vines spreads its influence as two friends struggle to contain it.The world just really has gone to shit, hasn't it?
Relationships: Alexis | Quackity & GeorgeNotFound & Karl Jacobs & Sapnap, BadBoyHalo & Skeppy, Cara | CaptainPuffy & Clay | Dream, Clay | Dream & GeorgeNotFound & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Ranboo (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Technoblade & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit, Clay | Dream & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Ranboo & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & Phil Watson
Comments: 205
Kudos: 365





	1. Masked Manipulation

**Author's Note:**

> TW: Emotional manipulation & abuse, gaslighting, and all that jazz. Language, violence, gore, blood, graphic depictions of violence, and character death. *slaps the fic* You can fit so much hurt and angst in this bad boy.
> 
> Warning: This fic also contains protective SBI, a clingy duo reunion, hurt/comfort for our favorite local enderman boy, and our traumatized children... also a Dream backstory with a redemption arc of sorts (but we don't have to forgive him for what that green boi did to our boys, kay?)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Green god manipulates traumatized sunshine child.

Tommy, honestly, had thought his life had hit a low when it had just been him and Wilbur - well holy shit had he been wrong. This, this was absolutely the worst he had ever felt because now, he was all alone...There was nothing worse than being alone. It was a cold, hollow feeling that twisted and festered like an untreated wound, except the scarring lay in the heart. 

Loneliness was an empty beach with full balloons unswayed and a smashed cake. It was the cliff of red stone protruding over a sea of magma that bubbled and broiled like the inner turmoil of a young boy's betrayed heart. It was a rainy day in a soggy tent with soaking shoes and tears hidden by the persistent drips of a leaky roof. It was bright memories and dark days with only his own ears to hear his strife. Tommy would've rathered die a thousand times over than stay alone, but it seemed like all he was nowadays was lonely. 

"Tommy," Dream's call was the only thing that could pull Tommy out of that isolation. He was the only thing to interrupt Tommy's rut of useless days and sleepless nights. 

"Dream!" Tommy immediately forsook the tree he was cutting down, throwing the stone ax aside as he ran towards the portal. Sure enough, the masked figure stood by the portal built of obsidian, his hands shrouded by his forest green cloak. He was real, not some fever dream or trick of the light. He had come back! 

"Tommy," Dream greeted with his familiar tone, something caught between welcoming and sharp. "I got worried when I didn't see you near the tent." 

"No, no man, I was- I was just cutting down another tree to make some more logs for - for - " Tommy felt his throat tighten a bit as he tried to explain himself. Dream must've thought he'd run away. No, no, Tommy would never run away from here, there was nowhere to go... and Dream would be furious. 

"Good, good," Dream smiled, grabbing Tommy's shoulder and squeezing it reassuringly. So he wasn't mad... Tommy breathed a small sigh of relief and looked up at the mask that covered his friend's face. Dream was still looking at him. Tommy quickly looked down at himself, wondering what the hell was wrong for the guy to stare so long when he realized he had put on iron boots.

"O-Oh, sorry, I forgot. Here, I got it - " Tommy winced as he quickly went to take the armor off. 

"Thank you, Tommy," Dream's praise brought some warmth to Tommy's chest. He watched as Dream dug the familiar hole in the dirt, throwing Tommy's boots in before looking to Tommy expectantly. He wanted something... what did he _want?_

"What's up, man?" Tommy asked, fidgeting with his fingers. 

"Is that it?" Dream's voice hung in the air and settled heavily on Tommy's chest. 

"Uh... uh..." Tommy quickly thought back to anything else he had stored in his inventory space. Quickly, a sword materialized in his hand and was thrown in the pit, along with a crudely cut wooden shovel.

The sticks of TNT were thrown down and with a simple spark, it all blasted apart. Smoke poured out of the hole, curling around Tommy and Dream before the masked figure turned and threw an arm over the boy's shoulder. 

"So, now that that's all over and done with, how about you tell me what the plans are for the day?" Dream sounded cheerful enough which made Tommy's face light up. He'd been good and so Dream was happy - that meant Dream would stick around for a while. 

The loneliness retreated for now. When Dream was with him, that empty, consuming feeling of hollowness disappeared. It didn't matter what replaced it, whether it be rage, fear, sadness, joy, or the familiar jumble of emotions that the masked man instilled in the exiled boy, as long as it was gone. 

"W-well Big D, I - um - well I've got that party I'm planning right?" Tommy reminded him happily. "So... So I was thinking, I thought we could pretty the beach up." 

"Oh!" Dream nodded, not commenting on the nickname. 

"Yeah... Yeah, that could be fun." Tommy snickered as he glanced at the bare beach his new home was sporting at the moment. 

"It looks fucking sad right now."

"Oh, I don't know, it's a real nice location. And... and look at the dolphins!" Dream pointed to the bay where two dolphins were leaping in the afternoon sun. Tommy broke away from Dream's hold and ran to the sandy shore. 

"Right! The dolphins are right here, so I was thinking we set up a table right by the ocean a-and maybe I could make something really nice like... hmmm, how about a cake. Everybody fucking loves cake." 

"Cake sounds good," Dream concurred. He clapped his hands together and looked around. "So... how about we start on that table and then see what happens?" They went towards the woods, Dream clearing away the trees with ease while Tommy spent a bit longer with only his hands to suffice. His ax was somewhere on the forest floor and he was sure Dream wouldn't be happy to know that he still had a tool somewhere, even if Tommy had thrown it away by accident. 

They split the wood into planks, picking a space on the beach where the land was the most usable. As they assembled the wood Tommy found himself smiling as he imagined what tomorrow would bring. 

"You seem to be in a good mood," Dream recognized. 

"Oh... oh I am," Tommy smiled. "I'm going to see everyone tomorrow!" 

Dream never looked up from the crafting table, or if he did it was hidden by the mask. 

"Th-thanks for letting me do this, Big D," Tommy murmured. 

"Don't call me that," Dream sighed. 

"Sorry." 

Dream only snickered. 

"All fucking around aside, thanks, man. For real," Tommy insisted. 

Dream finally looked up from the crafting table, the two dots for eyes on his mask staring right through Tommy. "Tommy, you don't have to thank me. We're friends." 

Tommy smiled, "Yeah!"

~~~

"Shhh," Dream soothed as Tommy sobbed into his green cloak. Tommy knew he probably looked disgusting, covered in snot and tears... but he felt so fucking broken. That hollow loneliness was stronger than it had ever been, eating away at him like a monster. Dream's arms wrapped around him and Tommy couldn't help but lean into that touch that felt so familiar and warm that it quelled the loneliness from devouring him whole. Wilbur used to hug him like this. He buried his face in Dream's cloak, trying to hide his ugly face from the only source of solace he had.

"Where are they?" Tommy demanded, his voice cracking in rage and despair. A hand ran through his blonde hair, picking through the golden locks before letting them fall back to their new positions. 

"Where are they, Dream?" Tommy cried, his scream coming out more like a broken wail. Like he was some fucking kid... he was though, wasn't he? Wasn't he just a kid? A kid that had fought for his life for what felt like his whole existence. A kid who had already lost two of his three lives in this fucking world? 

"I... I don't know, Tommy," Dream murmured. 

"Why... aren't they here? Why the fuck aren't they here?" 

"I really don't know." 

"They got invitations, right? Everyone got - " 

"I assume so," Dream concurred. "I saw Wilbur with them and I was sure that... no, maybe I'm wrong." 

"What?" Tommy demanded, pulling away from Dream and wiping his eyes furiously trying to hide his bloodshot tearful eyes. 

"Well, I think Tubbo was given his invitation in person," Dream seemed to release this information tentatively. 

"He did?" 

"Yeah... I thought I heard Wilbur talking to him about it." 

That brought a whole new bout of tears to Tommy's eyes. He hiccuped and broke down again, curling in on himself. Through his blurred tears, he could see the empty beach and the storm clouds building on the horizon. The bench he was on shifted as Dream slid closer. 

"I'm sorry Tommy, I didn't think... I didn't think they hated you this much. I thought... I thought _someone_ would show up at least." 

Tommy sniffled before slowly turning into Dream's tall figure to bury his face once more in the thick green cloak. Dream allowed it, rubbing soothing circles into the sobbing boy's back. 

"I should've warned you..." Dream reminisced. "I shouldn't have let you get your hopes up. I'm sorry." 

Tommy tried to argue that it wasn't Dream's fault. That Dream was the only one who showed up, the only one who _cared_! He shouldn't apologize for any of this shit. It was his own stupid, stupid fault for getting so excited, for hoping anyone cared, but there was too large a lump in his throat for him to voice any of it. 

"I should've known... I - I honestly should've expected that as soon as Tubbo broke that compass - " Dream continued. 

"What?" Tommy forced the word out of his throat, trembling as much as the words did tumbling from his throat. He looked up to Dream, knowing how much raw emotion must've been on his face. 

"I'm sorry, Tommy," Dream prefaced. 

"What... What did he do to the compass?" Tommy pleaded. 

"He threw it away," Dream stated simply. "At least I think he did." 

Tommy felt his tears dry as something in his chest snapped. He was still clinging to Dream's cloak but his eyes were locked staring into space as he registered those words. He was still shaking, his lip trembling as he felt the world melt away. Not Tubbo... no... no he wouldn't... Would he? Dream... Dream thought it had happened. Dream knew a lot and saw more than Tommy ever did. He... he was the only connection Tommy still had to L'Manburg. If Dream said Tubbo had thrown the compass away then... 

The compass tucked beneath Tommy's shirt suddenly felt cold, more like a hunk of metal than the warm beacon it so long had stood for. The arrow that pointed to his best friend felt less like a connection, and more like a tether. 

"He... he wouldn't have," Tommy breathed. 

"Tommy... I... maybe you're right," Dream had no confidence in that statement. 

"Why isn't he here!?" Tommy demanded. 

"I don't know - " 

"Nobody cares about me anymore... nobody... nobody cares." 

"That's not true, Tommy," Dream's voice washed over Tommy, holding some strange tone to it that Tommy couldn't read. 

"Dream, nobody came! Nobody came to my party!" Tommy was suddenly standing up, his feet carrying him towards the obsidian portal, his hand clenched the compass hanging round his neck. "It's the least they could've done... after... after fucking me over and exiling me. But... but no one came." 

He strode through the portal, his skin prickling as the warmth seeped into his bones. He ripped the compass off his neck, snapping the chain in two as he approached the edge of the bridge he so carefully had built. The weight around his neck was gone now, leaving him feeling like he had just removed a noose... but he still couldn't breathe. He stood at the edge of the bridge, staring into the bubbling sea of lava below him, his fingers brushing against the engraving on the compass.

_Your Tubbo_

Tommy felt tears slide down his cheeks as he gravely reached out and dangled the compass over the edge. The silver metal swung there powerlessly, the enchantment on it shimmering in the warm glow of the magma.

"No one cares," Tommy whimpered, his hand still clenching the chain. His knuckles were white as they gripped the chain, shaking as Tommy tried to force himself to let go. Let the compass fall... Let them all go. 

"How about you sleep on it," Dream's voice startled Tommy as he looked to his side where Dream stood. He must've followed him in here... he followed Tommy... he cared. Dream gently put his arm over Tomy's shoulder and led him back to the portal.

"Nobody came," Tommy whimpered, holding the compass close to his chest. Dream pulled the boy closer, squeezing his arm gently. 

"Nobody..." Tommy continued, hesitating as he clenched his jaw. "Nobody cares." 

"I care," Dream spoke softly as he leaned closer. 

Tommy was still crying but his lips twitched into a sad sort of smile. They crossed through the threshold of obsidian and came out into the beginning of a storm. Tommy looked up at the rain, happy for something to wash away the residue of his breakdown. 

"Well... since no one else is here, why don't we have some fun," Dream proposed as his mask lifted towards the sky. Tommy looked at Dream in wonder as the white mask was lifted to expose a scarred face with a wry smile and eyes that reminded Tommy of the soft grass on a sunny day. It was the face of a stranger. 

"Dream... your mask - " Tommy started, like an idiot, as if the man hadn't just chosen to show his face. 

"I know," Dream smiled. 

He raised a hand causing a brilliant blue trident to appear in his hands. Tommy's eyes widened as he took in the ancient weapon glimmering with enchantments. 

"Is that - " Tommy began. 

"Have you ever been riptiding, Tommy?" Dream asked, handing the trident to Tommy who took it with trembling hands. 

"This... this is mine?" Tommy asked in awe. 

"It's mine," Dream shrugged. "But you can use it." 

Tommy raised the spear-like weapon, fascinated by how cool it was to the touch. He experimented with the balance a bit before moving to throw it into the sky. The enchantment raced through the weapon into Tommy's body, slamming through his feet. The next thing he knew, he was freefalling thousands of feet above the world. He was soaked and smelled strangely of seawater, but he felt like he was flying. He laughed for a moment before realizing the earth was approaching fast, then he panicked slightly (only slightly because TommyInnit never shrieked, ever). He twisted his body shifting his trajectory towards the ocean where he landed with a splash, plunging into the warm waters that sharply contradicted the cold northern rain. 

He came to the surface with a gasp and heard cheering. He looked back to the shore where Dream was clapping, a kind smile on his face. Tommy's heart soared and he whooped. The loneliness went away for a while once again. The loneliness always went away when Dream was near.

~~~

"So you believe Ranboo over me?" Dream's voice wasn't harsh, but it somehow managed to cut Tommy's heart. Tommy felt his lip tremble, his hands were fidgeting again. 

  


_"Tommy, no one got their letters," Ranboo explained, looking over his shoulder as if waiting for something to come and attack him. He looked back to Tommy, looking somewhat timid despite having such a tall stature. His tail was flicking about like a snake as he fidgeted with his claws._

_"Bullshit," Tommy hissed._

__

_"It's true!" Ranboo desperately cried._

_"Ghostbur handed them out! He was supposed to... he should've handed them out."_

_"You mean Ghostbur isn't here?" Ranboo looked confused and had begun flickering, purple particles dancing around him._

_"No. Does it look like he's fucking anywhere around here?"_

_"But - "_

_"Go away, Ranboo. Just fuck off." Tommy shoved past Ranboo, heading for the woods._

__

_"Tommy! Please, listen - " Ranboo caught Tommy's wrist, both of his differently colored eyes flickering just like his body. "- I think Dream's lying to you."_

  


"You think I'm lying to you?" Dream's voice was laced with something dangerous that made Tommy's stomach curl. 

"N-no," Tommy managed. "No. Please. I just - Ranboo just said - I just wanted to know." 

"You want to know if I sabotaged your invitations?" Dream repeated the question, his words cold and sharp. 

"I - fuck - I didn't mean - Dream, listen," Tommy pleaded. 

"No, Tommy," Dream corrected, pointing a finger at the boy. "You listen. If you don't want me here, just say so. I don't need to waste my time with you if I'm going to be made the bad guy." 

With that, Dream started for the portal. Fear crept up Tommy's throat as he realized Dream was leaving... Leaving him alone. 

"Dream! Dream, wait!" Tommy cried, running after him as the masked man strode to the obsidian gateway. 

"I didn't mean to make you - You're not the bad guy! Okay? I'm sorry! Please don't go!" Tommy cried desperately as he tried to catch up. 

Dream didn't even give him a second glance before he stepped through. Tommy scrambled in after him, stumbling out the other side and looking around frantically for the familiar green visage of his friend. Instead, Tommy had familiar purple particles settle around him - Dream must've pearled away. Tommy looked down the bridge where he just barely glimpsed a green hood disappearing into the red mist. 

"DREAM!" Tommy cried, sprinting across the bridge desperately. 

Stupid, stupid, _stupid_. 

Tommy cursed himself over and over again as he screamed to deaf ears his apology. Here he was again, pushing people away. What if Dream left forever? What if he never came back? Suddenly the idea of that loneliness was so suffocating that Tommy began crying again as he sprinted towards the portal that led to L'Manburg. He arrived too late. There was no sign of Dream. Only the forbidden gate that Tommy knew he could never cross. He hugged himself, cursing and crying as the realization that he was alone again swallowed him. "Come back," he begged as he fell to his knees, pressing his hands against the obsidian. 

"Please, I'm sorry. I'm sorry." 

There was no answer, no assurances, just the familiar sounds of monsters, bubbling lava, and the twisting space around the portal. Tommy settled down and sat near the portal, sniffling and sobbing, just hoping Dream would come back. Why would he come back? Tommy hiccuped and cried as he came to the realization that there was no reason for Dream to ever come back. Tommy was worthless, he had nothing to give the man, nothing that Dream could benefit from. He was just an ugly, useless, worthless child that no one wanted... right? 

Tommy glanced at the portal, knowing full well that if he went through it, he'd be condemning himself to death. Dream would probably kill him, he probably wouldn't even feel bad. He hated him now too. Just like Tubbo. 

Tubbo. 

Tommy suddenly realized that anyone could come out of the portal. Ranboo, Sapnap, Fundy, even Tubbo. What if they came through and saw him here? What if they thought he was trying to sneak back? Would they kill him? Would they tell Dream? Would... would they laugh at him? He looked like a wreck, he knew that. He was covered in weeks of grime, dirt, monster guts, and zombie gore. He'd lost a shoe somewhere in the woods and only had a holey sock to suffice. He hadn't slept soundly in weeks and it showed every time he looked in the water; the bags under his dark eyes. If anyone saw him like this... they'd jeer. They'd laugh and point and enjoy his suffering. The thought of seeing Tubbo do that to him made Tommy want to hurl. 

He scrambled to his feet and walked slowly back towards his home portal, stuffing his hands in his pockets and biting his chapped lips. He sat down at the base of his "home" portal, hugging his knees and whimpering as tears slipped from his eyes. He didn't want to go back home. He didn't want to be all alone again. The loneliness was eating away at him, devouring and ripping as it tore apart his mind. 

"Dream... Dream will come back," Tommy breathed, lying to himself. He was lying to himself. Dream wouldn't come back, he'd be alone forever. 

"He'll come back," Tommy shook. "He's my friend... he's my friend and... and I pushed him away." He began to sob again. 

"I'm a fucking idiot and I... I pushed Dream away. I'm so fucking stupid..." He felt like he could hardly breathe. "I'll wait here. I'll wait here and he'll come back. He'll come back... He has to come back." 

Tommy wasn't sure how long he sat there. After he finished sobbing like a child, he felt too tired to drag himself back through the portal and face his empty campsite. He just sat there, staring into the lava, watching the gigantic ghasts glide past, none of them seeing him, miraculously. 

At some point, his mind began lying to him. He saw Wilbur standing a few feet away. Not Ghostbur, _Wilbur_. The man was smiling as he approached, his trench coat flying behind him as he walked up.

_"Oh no, is little Tommy all by himself? Oh, how sad,"_ he taunted as he towered over Tommy, his expression as crazed as it had been in Wilbur's final moments. It still seemed wrong. 

"Fuck off," Tommy pleaded, his voice breaking. 

_"Come on Tommy, that's not how you should treat me."_

"I hate you," Tommy murmured. 

_"But Tommy! You're just like me!"_

"No. No I'm not," Tommy cried, covering his ears and squeezing his eyes closed. 

_"Yes you are... you're all alone."_ Wilbur's voice still rung out clear and true. 

Tommy's eyes opened for a moment and he saw Wilbur crouching before him, blood spilling from a large wound in his chest as the red substance trickled from his lips. _"And you're going to die, just like me. A villain, Tommy. You're going to die and no one is going to miss you. We were always the Villains Tommy, just like I said!"_

"GO AWAY!" Tommy screamed at the vision. "LEAVE ME ALONE!" 

_"I thought you didn't want to be alone,"_ Wilbur snickered as his visage faded leaving Tommy with blurry eyes and an aching head. 

"I don't," Tommy choked, hugging his knees. "I don't..." 

Hours passed. Maybe even days. Tommy was starving but he didn't care. He was so tired... so, so incredibly tired. He couldn't sleep in the Nether, he knew that; all beings couldn't bring themselves to sleep in this hellscape, it came with the territory. But that was okay, for he didn't want to sleep. What if Dream forgot something? What if he came back to get it while Tommy was sleeping? Tommy couldn't risk it, he wanted to see Dream again. Apologize. Make it right... He didn't want to be alone. 

His mind was cruel to him. He saw Wilbur a few more times. His crazy brother's descent into madness played out around him like some tragic reenactment. Once or twice he saw Technoblade, the warrior would apparate like some spirit and only ever call him that stupid name; Theseus. Theseus. Theseus. Like the toll of a bell, over and over again. Taunting Tommy with that stupid prophecy that sat under every call.

_Do you know what they did to him, Tommy? They exiled him. He died in disgrace._

The worst was when he saw Tubbo, sometimes he was smiling, sometimes he was crying, but every time the boy would walk away from Tommy, leaving him alone in the red mist that rose from the lava.

Perhaps his consciousness faded in and out at times because it felt like one moment Tommy was begging for Tubbo to come back and the next someone was picking him up and carrying him through the portal. Gods, he was so tired. As soon as he passed into the cooler Overworld he felt his entire body relax as his eyes begged to close. He leaned into the chest of whoever was holding him, just happy that someone was close, someone was holding him. He was taken into the tent before whoever it was gently set him down on the mess of soggy blankets that sufficed for a bed. 

Before they could leave, Tommy grabbed their shirt and clung to it. 

"Please," he rasped. "Please don't leave me alone." 

He didn't care who it was, he just didn't want to be left behind. Left alone. 

"Tommy," a familiar voice cooed; Dream. "Tommy, I won't leave you." 

"Dream?" Tommy tried to open his eyes to make out the green-clad man but all he saw were blurry shapes. "You... you came back?" 

Dream shifted so that the two of them were seated on the blankets, Tommy leaning on Dream, so happy to be in contact with him. Dreams arm draped over Tommy's shoulder, pulling him closer. 

"Of course I came back, Tommy," Dream's voice reminded Tommy of honey, so thick and somehow sweet. 

"Why?" Tommy's cracking voice was such a sharp contrast to the mask's man smooth sounds. 

"Because we're friends," Dream answered simply, starting to play with Tommy's hair. Shifting the little locks of sunshine side to side methodically. Tommy leaned into the touch, a smile of relief on his face. 

"Dream," Tommy managed. "I'm sorry... I'm sorry... I'll be better, please don't go away again." 

"Oh Tommy," Dream sounded almost proud as he soothed the boy. "I won't ever leave unless you give me reason to." 

"I won't," Tommy swore, his voice growing weaker. "I won't... please... please don't leave me alone." 

"Shhh," Dream soothed, putting a heavy hand on Tommy's head. "Sleep. I'm here, I'll stay." 

Tommy wanted to say more, wanted to explain just how sorry he was, but his body was heavy and his eyes were drooping and... 

... and he was fast asleep in Dream's arms. 

It was the first full night of rest he ever had.

~~~

Tommy splashed his face with water, scrubbing away some of the grime and ash from the nether. He took a deep breath as the cold water ran down his neck feeling more relaxed than he had in weeks. That was, until he looked down at the water and found Wilbur's crazed face smiling back up at him from his reflection.

Tommy yelped and threw himself backward, his chest rising and falling frantically. 

"Tommy?" Dream called but Tommy hardly heard him. 

Slowly, he crept back to the water's edge, peering over the soft lapping waves to the still water. There he was. Tommy, not Wilbur, _Tommy_. Sure, he looked like shit, the bags under his eyes hadn't disappeared even after the good night's sleep he had and still stained beneath his eyes ... like the dark stains that had so long sat under Wilbur's eyes. His eyes were rather dark too... dim and grey, so much unlike the brilliant blue they had always been. It... it was like how Wilbur's eyes had faded. They'd been so bright, a brilliant brown, full of life and spirit and then... dim. A murky, empty look in his eyes that only ever sparked when he thought of the destruction of his country and the vengeance he could finally have.

Fuck. Fuck he looked like Wilbur. 

"Tommy? Tommy?" suddenly Dream had an arm around him, pulling Tommy into a side-ways embrace. Tommy hadn't even realized he was crying until he touched his face and felt the residue of his sobs.

"Tommy, what's wrong?" Dream cooed. 

"I... I look... I saw..." Tommy fumbled to even organize his thoughts. 

Dream hushed him again, using a soft tone as he brushed the hair out of the boy's face. "I can't understand you unless you speak clearly." 

"Wilbur..." Tommy's breath hitched. "I - fuck Dream, I thought I... I can't be like Wilbur. I can't be."

_"Let's be the bad guys"_

"Tommy," Dream soothed, almost condescending in tone. "You won't be like Wilbur."

_"Everyone who's on our side, they're lying to us!"_

Tommy broke out of the embrace and held his head to try and quell the memories. "I don't want to be the bad guy..."

_"Do you know what it means when a man has nothing left to lose? It means we can do whatever the fuck we want."_

"Tommy," Dream's voice was suddenly firm and silenced Wilbur's voice that had been echoing in Tommy's skull like the echo in the Pogtopia ravine. Tommy looked to Dream who's mask had been lifted to reveal his face. The scars on his face surprised Tommy every time he saw them, a testament to the battles the masked man had seen.

"Yeah?" Tommy asked. 

"You can't be like Wilbur." 

"Why not?" Tommy challenged. "What's stopping me from... from making the same mistake - " 

"Wilbur was weak," Dream's voice sliced through whatever argument Tommy was forming. It struck Tommy like a slap to the face. 

Wilbur... weak? 

"He had potential, sure," Dream began. "I mean he was raised by Philza, so he wasn't a fool, though it was surprising at times. He could've been great, but he wasted too much time on lesser things."

  


_"Hang on, Tommy, just shift your position a little bit. See! Now you've got it!" a teenage Wilbur grinned as he adjusted young Tommy's footing and nodding approval as Tommy fidgeted with the wooden sword in his hands._

_"I feel weird," Tommy scowled as he tried to go back to his previous stance._

_"No, no, none of that. This will give you more balance!" Wilbur denied._

_"But it FEELS wrong!" Tommy cried._

_Wilbur moaned but smiled none the less._

_"Here, this is what Dad showed me," Wilbur mimicked the stance he had just taught Tommy. "And we do it so that when you're shoved or shot up, you can catch yourself with your back foot - " he shifted off-balance, planting his back foot and using it as the power behind a suddenly swing of his wooden sword " - and cut that motherfucker apart before they get you."_

_Tommy crossed his arms and bit his lip. "I don't need Philza's stupid counterstrike."_

_That seemed to wound Wilbur. He put down the wooden sword and knelt before Tommy. "Tommy... Dad would be here if he could - " Wilbur began._

_"He wants to, believe me - "_

_"I don't need Philza," Tommy snapped. "Just teach me how to stab shit."_

_Wilbur sighed but ruffled the kid's hair. "Alright," Wilbur murmured._

  


"He was too caught up with the people around him," Dream continued. "All of those attachments left him vulnerable, and yet he seemed so shocked every time he was betrayed."

  


_Tommy was crying as he suddenly felt his body slam into the earth. He... he was alive again. His hands flew to his chest that had just had a sword in it - Dream's sword. His skin still pricked from the cold underground bunker, everyone's screams echoing in his head._

_"TOMMY!" Wilbur's raw voice screamed as his brother emerged from the brush and grabbed the boy. "Tommy, Tommy are you okay!?"_

_"Eret... Eret just - He just... Wilbur, I lost a life!" Tommy cried with tears in his eyes._

_"I know," Wilbur tried to soothe, looking just as shaken as Tommy felt._

_"DAD!" Fundy cried in terror. The boy was in his human form, his fox-like ears pressed against his head. He had suddenly appeared a few feet to the right, he had his hands to his neck and was hyperventilating._

_"Oh god, Fundy. Fundy are you okay?" Wilbur was crying now as he grabbed his son and pulled him close. Fundy was terrified, his large tail curling around him as he grabbed his Father and cried._

_"We just... It mattered, Wilbur. That life mattered," Tommy choked. It hurt so much... an actual death... Tommy hadn't been ready for it._

_"I know... I know," Wilbur breathed as he pulled the two of them in. "I'm so sorry."_

  


"I mean... that's not to say any of those are bad things." Dream seemed to be deep in thought, his green gaze falling to the horizon. "I think his biggest flaw was how heavily he relied on all of those connections. Every betrayal, every disagreement, all of it chipped away at him like... fine china. Until it was only broken pieces left."

  


_"Wilbur?" Tommy asked tentatively as he peered into Wilbur's torch-lit room in Pogtopia. The man was holding his head, silently crying._

_"Wilbur are you okay?" Tommy asked, raising his voice. Wilbur took a steep breath of cave air before turning around and throwing on a smile despite the obvious tears in his eyes._

_"Yeah, Tommy. I'm okay. Don't worry about me."_

_"You're lying." Wilbur's eyebrow twitched a bit in surrender as he smiled wryly._

_"You know me too well, Tommy."_

_"Wilbur... talk to me," Tommy pleaded. "We- we can figure this out. You... you don't have to act like you're in this alone."_

_Wilbur smiled warmly as he walked past Tommy, ruffling his hair._

_"Thanks, Tommy... but I never thought I was alone."_

  


"He wasn't resilient enough to pick himself up when the time came," Dream reminisced. "There's really nothing that you can't come back from... except death, but Wilbur never cared to see that."

  


_Tommy could hardly breathe. He was surrounded by chaos. People were screaming and shouting in the rubble of this city, but Tommy only had eyes for the two figures sitting where the button had been pressed, looking over the decimation. Phil was there. PHIL! He was there and... and he was crying. He was crying and cursing as his ethereal form sobbed over the limp figure in his arms. Phil's wings curled over the body like a shield and though he was far away, Tommy knew who that body was._

__

_"WILBUR!" Tommy screamed._

  


"But see, that's why you could never be Wilbur," Dream assured Tommy warmly.

"Why, Dream?" Tommy felt like he was going to be sick. 

"Because you aren't someone who relies on others," Dream explained. Tommy severely doubted that. 

"You are the one that people rely on," Dream continued, gently pointing a finger at Tommy's chest. 

"What?" Tommy muttered. 

Dream chuckled as he glanced into Tommy's eyes, his green ones sparking with something energetic and wild - something unnatural. "Think about it, Tommy, you've never given in, never surrendered. You never needed anyone for that." 

"I... I need people," Tommy muttered. 

"It's always nice to have a friend," Dream concurred, running his fingers through Tommy's hair. "But it's not... necessary. And you have me." 

"Yeah..." 

"You won't be like Wilbur," Dream soothed, a grin slowly curling on his lips as he pulled the boy closer. "At least not while I'm here."


	2. Duality of Friendship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ranboo wants to help Tommy and Tubbo but the green man is terrifying and our boi has anxiety. Dadza to the rescue!!

Ranboo was _terrified_ of Dream. Everything about the man's aura made a part of him want to teleport out of the plane completely. He hated how easily the masked man could make him flinch but there was no doubt that there was good reason to be scared. Something about the figure just radiated supernatural power that made every inhuman part of Ranboo want to shrink into nothingness.

He wished he could just get Tommy to understand that he should be scared. That Dream wasn't a good guy. That whatever Dream was doing to Tommy was... was _wrong_. It was wrong in so many ways. 

Every time Ranboo saw him he swore Tommy only got worse. It made him sick with guilt to think about what could be happening to Tommy when he was all alone with Dream. Every time Dream got close to Tommy, every time Tommy called Dream a friend, every time the two did anything remotely kind to one another, it felt sinister. Ranboo felt like he was watching someone getting hung from gallows except the victim didn't see the noose.

He tried so hard to gently open Tommy's eyes. He wanted to get to Tommy without alerting Dream, maybe... maybe if he could get Tommy to see Dream was manipulating him, he could resist Dream, somehow. He could... well Ranboo couldn't quite remember what the plan was after that, he hadn't written that much down in his journal. But - but he knew Tommy couldn't continue to live like this. He couldn't let Dream keeping... winning.

Because Dream was definitely winning something, Ranboo just couldn't figure it out yet.

"Tommy, nobody got their letters," he tried to reason. Tommy looked near unconsolable with heavy bags under foggy eyes. Ranboo hated it, he wanted to grab his friend by the shoulders and beg him to understand what was happening. But, every step was a trek over a thin layer of ice and Ranboo couldn't... he couldn't risk hurting Tommy. He didn't want to do anything more to hurt him.

"Bullshit," Tommy's voice sounded as fragile as he looked.

"It's true!" Ranboo emphasized. It hurt, somewhat, to know that Tommy would believe that he would purposefully ignore an invitation. Purposefully leave him alone. Purposefully hurt him.

"Ghostbur handed them out! He was supposed to... he should've handed them out."

Ranboo felt his heart plummet into his gut as he thought of the happy yellow-sweatered ghost who hadn't been seen in a few days.

"You mean Ghostbur isn't here?" Ranboo asked fearfully. If... if he wasn't in L'Manburg and he wasn't in Logstedshire - 

"No. Does it look like he's fucking anywhere around here?" Tommy snapped.

"But - " Ranboo wanted to argue, shout, scream if he could but there was something about the fearsome way Tommy was glaring at him that made him shrink away.

"Go away, Ranboo. Just fuck off." Tommy shoved past, leaving Ranboo stumbling. Tommy strode towards the thick trees and in a moment of simple desperation, Ranboo grabbed Tommy's wrist.

"Tommy! Please, listen! I think Dream's lying to you," Ranboo pleaded. Tommy looked back at him before sharply jerking away.

"Dream's my friend..." Tommy breathed before he left Ranboo on the beach. Ranboo watched him stomp off, his ears and tail drooping as he was left alone.

"What's got him so... upset?" a familiar cold voice asked. Ranboo felt his cells tremble and contort as they tried to get him to teleport out of instinct. He whirled around to see Dream striding from the portal.

"Oh... uh, hi Dream," Ranboo managed with an awkward wave.

"Ranboo," Dream sounded less than thrilled.

"I was... I was just leaving," Ranboo quickly strode towards the portal, fearfully noticing how the smiling mask followed his movement all the way back through that obsidian threshold.

~~~

The day progressed somewhat normally after Ranboo returned to L'Manburg. The hours dragged by, completely dulled by any paperwork Tubbo requested help with or lonely hours journaling. As the day came to a close, Ranboo stepped out to try and find Fundy. 

Maybe they could go find Niki and hang out. Maybe they could help take his mind off Tommy. Off Dream.

He hadn't gone far when he realized how eerie and quiet the town seemed. It wasn't unusual for most of the residents to be away; it was a big world, and people had an affinity for going off and finding adventure... or trouble. Usually trouble.

Still, there was something very off-putting about the evening. There was no night-life, no insects or bats flitting in the night air, even monster calls were unheard, and usually, by this time, their shrieks and groans would start becoming unbearable. Ranboo felt some instinct pulling him away, trying to make him flee or hide. He crept a bit further down the wooden planks when something grabbed him and made the world spin.

He was suddenly being slammed into the wooden wall of a house. He yelped but was quickly shut up by a strong hand clamping around his neck. Ranboo felt his body try and teleport away, being held back by the more human parts only for the sake of not ripping poor Ranboo in half. 

Dream was there. The porcelain mask was inches away from Ranboo's face. Ranboo's knees trembled, threatening to let him collapse. His blood had run cold and his hands had started twitching as he resisted to urge to draw his sword. He couldn't fight Dream, especially not when the masked thing had caught him off guard.

"Ranboo," Dream's voice was casual - as if pinning someone to the wall with one hand around their throat was a common occurrence. Like there was no reason for Ranboo to be shuddering so viciously.

"Dream," Ranboo rasped.

The masked man raised his free hand and Ranboo only watched in horror as a black, shimmering ax appeared in Dream's grasp. The masked man twirled it around for a moment before the mask turned back to Ranboo.

"I... you know, I don't think we've had much time to get to know each other. You're still rather new here so... I've granted you some leniency."

"Leniency," Ranboo breathed, his eyes wide with fear as they followed the terrifying dance of that shimmering ax.

"See... I don't... I'm not a big fan of people who... I suppose who feel the need to mess with me and my things," Dream supposed.

A snarl caught in Ranboo's throat as his eyes darted back to that smug mask. Tommy wasn't a _thing_ , and he wasn't Dream's.

"You didn't send Tommy's invitations out, did you?" Ranboo hissed. "You've been blocking my letters too! That's why you're here; because I told Tommy the truth - "

Suddenly the ax's blade was pressed against his throat and Ranboo felt every part of his body tense as the skin on his neck grew tense around the razor edge.

"Ranboo," Dream continued. "I really don't want to cause too big of a scene, but... but if you keep accusing me like this - " Dream leaned in closer and Ranboo suddenly felt strangely small under his gaze " - Then I'm going to have to make sure that you can't interfere."

"You can't kill me," Ranboo bluffed bravely. "We're in L'Manburg."

To that, Dream laughed, like it was some joke shared between friends. "You know, I marked you as a smart one, Ranboo. Do you think L'Manburg's rules really matter to me?"

Ranboo's throat was dry because as much as he hated it, it was true. If Dream said it, it happened. No one wanted to be in Ranboo's position right now and anyone who stood up to the masked man ended up in a similar predicament. It seemed like all the true power in the world rested solely in the masked man's gloved hands.

"Besides," Dream continued. "You shouldn't be so cocky just because you have three lives, that can easily change."

Ranboo inhaled sharply as the blade was pressed further into his throat. Something warm trickled down his skin and he had sinking feeling that the blade had broken skin.

"I really don't want to kill you, Ranboo," Dream explained simply. "So I'll ask you once, I need you to stay away from Tommy. He doesn't want you and he doesn't need you."

"And I guess he wants you!?" Ranboo challenged.

"He does," Dream agreed. The ax was pulled away and Ranboo finally breathed normally again, holding up a clawed hand to where his throat had been so easily exposed. When he pulled his white claw back he found it littered with red and green blood from a gentle trickle. He felt sick. 

A strong hand clamped on his shoulder and pulled him closer so that Dream could whisper in his ears.

"If I ever catch you around Tommy again, I'll make sure that both of you suffer the consequences. And... and you know what Ranboo? Maybe you can take it, but do you really think Tommy can?"

Ranboo could hardly breathe with the threat still in the air. Dream pulled away and turned, walking away.

"No need to be unnecessarily cruel, Ranboo, just leave Tommy alone. He doesn't like you anyway!" Dream called over his shoulder before disappearing around the corner.

As soon as he was out of sight, Ranboo fell to his knees, sweating and flickering as purple particles danced all around him, mirroring his panic.

Gods, that man terrified him.

~~~

It only took maybe a week before Ranboo worked up enough courage to try and go talk to Tommy again. He talked to a few more people to make certain that no, nobody had gotten invitations, and no one knew where Ghostbur was. So, Ranboo slipped into the Nether, and the first thing he noticed was the new bridge. Laid in green clay and cobblestone.

That was... unnerving; Dream's color... spread over Tommy's signature stone leading to Tommy's prison of a home.

Ranboo traversed the hellish bridge, stopping momentarily before the Logstedshire portal. He swallowed the lump in his throat and slipped through, stepping gently on the grass and looking around. No smiling mask, no green cloak... so it was safe.

Ranboo released a breath of relief and ventured further from the portal, scanning for Tommy but not daring to call out.

His paws disturbed a bit of foliage as he snuck between trees, looking for any sign of his friend... or of Dream. He really hoped that he wouldn't find Dream. When he finally found Tommy deeper in the woods he discovered the boy working carefully on a stone sword over a crafting table.

"T... Hey, Tommy," Ranboo greeted.

Tommy looked up, looking somewhat surprised. He looked absolutely exhausted.

"Ranboo," Tommy's greeting was heartless. Ranboo shifted uncertainly on his paws as he held his hands together. "You shouldn't be here," Tommy continued. "Dream doesn't like when people visit and he's not here."

"Dream's not here?" Ranboo perked up.

"No," Tommy seemed to deflate a bit. "He... he needed to go deal with stuff in L'Manburg or whatever. He's... he's coming back though."

Tommy's hands started shaking as he went back to carving the handle of his sword. 

Ranboo fiddled with his claws a bit before venturing over and sitting down beside Tommy.

"I - uh - I wanted to apologize, you know for how... for making you upset last time we talked," Ranboo murmured, trying to read Tommy's gaunt expression.

"Hmm?" Tommy asked. "Oh... oh yeah, uh. I guess you're... It doesn't matter anymore. Dream forgave me."

"Forgave you?" 

"Yeah, you know... he's not... he's a good friend. He always comes back. I - I thought when he left he'd, you know leave forever, you know, like everyone does. But - but Dream actually came back, and - and I didn't even have to change or anything and then I said sorry and he - " Tommy suddenly held his head and grimaced.

"Are you okay!?" Ranboo demanded fearfully.

"Oh, yeah yeah, I just... ug, I got this massive headache," Tommy smiled a bit as he held his mess of dirtied blond hair that was caked in mud and sand.

"When... When is the last time you slept?"

"Oh... I was actually sleeping pretty well before Dream left!" Tommy chirped.

"Yeah?" 

"Oh yeah!"

"But... but how about last night?"

"Oh my god, listen to you, you sound like Wilbur," Tommy moaned. "Tommy! Get to bed, you child. You tired little child! I am a big man and I can tell you when to get to bed and you've got to get eight hours of sleep and shit and I know what the hell I'm doing because I'm tall and edgy with good hair and all that shit."

"Well, sleep is pretty important," Ranboo smiled, happy to see a bit of the old Tommy return for a moment.

Tommy scoffed but had a smile on his face too.

"Have you... seen Wilbur recently, Tommy?" Ranboo asked.

The cloud that covered Tommy's brow was dark as a lighting storm. The boy stood up and strode away, the roughly-hewn sword in hand.

"No, I haven't," Tommy gritted as he left Ranboo scrambling after him.

"That's... that's not good. I haven't seen him either. Do you think he's okay? Maybe he - "

"I don't care."

"Wait... what?"

"I. Don't. Care. I'm not his... fucking... babysitter."

"But - Tommy!"

"Tommy!" there was a harsh call that made Ranboo shudder.

"Dream!" Tommy perked up almost joyfully, racing through the woods.

"Tommy - Tommy, wait no!" Ranboo hissed quietly, crouching down and creeping after him. He snuck through the trees until the portal came into view. There was Dream, standing tall and towering over a timidly celebratory Tommy who seemed attached to Dream, standing inches away from him eagerly looking up at him as he talked about something.

Dream occasionally nodded as Tommy rambled, his mask scanning the trees before coming to rest on the tree Ranboo was hiding behind. Ranboo's breath caught in his throat as Dream's mask hung on his position for just a few seconds too long.

He saw him. He definitely saw him.

"HEY! RANBOO!" Tommy called. Ranboo flinched but conceded, fearfully creeping out of the woodline and approaching the duo.

"See, told you he was around here," Tommy gestured as he looked to Dream.

Dream hummed in recognition before ruffling Tommy's hair and turning his mask away from Ranboo.

"How are you feeling, Tommy?" Dream asked.

"Oh, I'm good! I mean I'm really good now that you're here and - oh sorry," Tommy seemed to realize he had a sword and quickly tossed it away before rummaging through his pockets for a flint and steel.

"No, no, don't worry about that," Dream chuckled before leading Tommy over to the portal. "How about sleep? You don't seem too well-rested."

"Oh... I don't need to sleep. Sleep is... haha, it's for the weak," Tommy grinned.

"Tommy," Dream scolded condescendingly, sitting down in the grass beside the portal. Tommy immediately plopped down beside him. "Tommy, you should sleep."

"I'm not... I'm not tired, I swear," Tommy grinned, his voice small. In response, Dream pulled the boy close and began to mess with his blond hair.

"You shouldn't lie to me, Tommy," Dream reprimanded.

"I'm... I'm not," Tommy protested, even quieter.

Dream only hummed in response, his fingers picking through clumps of golden hair, moving carefully and methodically for a few silent minutes until Tommy had fallen asleep.

Ranboo didn't even dare twitch during the strange ritual. The portal was mere steps away but Dream was leaning on the obsidian framework, laying in wait it seemed. The two stayed in silence for minutes, both of their eyes fixed on Tommy who's breaths had grown deep and slow as he rested on Dream's forest-colored cloak.

"I warned you, Ranboo," Dream broke the silence, his fingers never ceasing their methodical carding of golden hair. Ranboo felt his blood run cold.

"I-I just came to see if he was okay," Ranboo defended.

"He has me, he's safe," Dream stated.

 _Not from you_ , Ranboo wanted to hiss.

"I... know," Ranboo shifted on his paws, keeping his eyes glued to the ground. No eye contact... don't make eye contact.

"Then why did you come?"

That was a dangerous tone. Ranboo felt his heart start beating like a rabbit's footsteps.

"I... I just wanted to see him," Ranboo explained.

"Hmm," Dream's hand suddenly left Tommy's head, navigating down to the compass hanging from the boy's neck. With a strong yet precise yank, the weak chain snapped and left the compass dangling from Dream's fingers. Tommy whined a bit before settling back to sleep, oblivious to the weight missing from his neck.

"What are you doing?" Ranboo's demand was strained as he watched the masked man dangle the compass. Not the compass, not Tommy's compass. Please, not the compass.

"It's... it's a small thing, isn't it?" Dream pondered. "But... the smallest, most... the most insignificant things can prove to be important. What do you think?"

"I mean, maybe," Ranboo muttered.

"Still... no matter how important it is, it's still fragile." Ranboo watched in horror as Dream calmly slammed the compass into the obsidian wall, shattering the quiet with glass and bending metal. A very small, hurt sound emerged from Ranboo's throat as Dream pulled the compass back and admired his handiwork.

"You - you..." Ranboo could barely find his words.

Dream held a finger to the smile of his mask, signaling for silence before he turned his attention back to a stirring Tommy.

"Dream?" Tommy murmured drowsily, his grey eyes flickering open a bit as he shifted from his position.

"Shhh," Dream soothed, dropping the compass in the grass as his hand returned to sort through Tommy's hair. "Go back to sleep."

"I heard something," Tommy muttered.

"I don't think you did," Dream hummed, pulling Tommy back into his position and lulling him back to that ritual of slumber. "Go back to sleep."

Ranboo wanted to yell, wanted to speak at least, but as the mask turned back to him and stared into his eyes he felt frozen in place. He couldn't make his lips move or force a sound out of his throat. They stood, frozen in eye contact until Tommy was back in a deeper sleep.

"I think it's time you leave, Ranboo," Dream dismissed, looking away from Ranboo and turning his attention back to Tommy. It was like a spell had been broken and Ranboo could move again. His knees felt weak and his stomach felt like it was trying to jump out of his throat.

"You - you... you can't - " Ranboo still felt like he was going to be sick. He had a thousand different thoughts pounding in his head but all of them fell short as he stared at the smiling bleached mask.

"Please, don't hurt Tommy anymore. Just leave him alone," Dream ordered simply, picking the compass up from the grass and bending aspects of the chain before reattaching it around Tommy's neck.

"You're... you're the one hurting him," Ranboo hissed. "You... you caused all of this."

"I'm not going to ask again," Dream warned, the tone leaning into deadly territory. "Go, Ranboo, before you wake him."

Ranboo swallowed the spew of hate that was building in his throat and forced himself to walk towards the portal, looking away from the masked being.

"And Ranboo," Dream added as Ranboo's claws ghosts over the obsidian. He glanced over at the man who was still occupied with Tommy's hair. "Next time... I can't... well, I can't promise you'll both walk out... unscathed should you come again."

Ranboo suppressed a shiver and looked away. "I... understand..."

"Good. Now leave... and stay quiet, Ranboo. I'd hate to have to refute your lies. Let's just keep this between friends."

Those words felt like acid on Ranboo's skin as he slipped into the Nether.

~~~

Ranboo strode towards the President's house, his gait firm and driven.

_Tell Tubbo. Tell Tubbo. Tell Tubbo._

The mantra he'd written in his journal over and over again last night rung in his head like an unyielding alarm. He had to tell Tubbo about Dream... about Tommy. Dream's threats hung in his head too but louder than Dream, louder than Ranboo's mantra, louder than anything was the terrible sound of a compass shattering against obsidian.

_Let's keep this between friends._

Dream was no friend. A terrifying, possibly all-powerful eldritch horror/ ethereal god, maybe, but he wasn't a friend. Tommy was.

Tubbo needed to know what was happening. Maybe if Ranboo enlisted others, they'd stand a chance... maybe...

He paused before Tubbo's door, hesitating for only a brief moment as the thought of Dream's ax pressed against his throat replayed in his mind's eye. The slice has scabbed over from their last encounter but it was still _very_ memorable. He took a breath and knocked on the door, standing a bit taller as footsteps approached and the door creaked open.

"Oh! Hey, Ranboo!" Tubbo chirped as he opened the door. His eyes were bright and lively which always seemed to brighten anyone's spirits, even Ranboo's.

"Hi," Ranboo smiled.

"Come on in, come in," Tubbo urged as Ranboo followed him inside.

"Tubbo, I need to talk to y-" Ranboo's words strangled himself as he turned away from the door and found himself looking at the blank smiling mask of Dream.

"Hello Ranboo," Dream greeted simply from where he sat. He lounged in a chair at Tubbo's table, a chessboard laid out before him.

"Dream," Ranboo managed, taking a step back.

"Oh yeah, we were just playing a game of chess. Would you like to watch?" Tubbo asked eagerly as he closed the door behind Ranboo. "I could use some help."

"No, no, you're doing great, Tubbo," Dream waved the boy off assuringly.

"Oh, I don't know about that," Tubbo muttered sheepishly.

"You're an incredible opponent," Dream insisted. Tubbo grinned, perhaps a bit embarrassed by the praise.

Ranboo felt like he was frozen in place once more as Tubbo walked back to the table and plopped down across from Dream, his eyes narrowing as he took in the board.

"So... what did you want to talk about, Ranboo?" Tubbo asked as he picked up his white bishop and moved it diagonally across the board, taking Dream's castle. The young president looked up and smiled happily at Ranboo which only made Ranboo's heart fall further in his gut.

"I... uh... came to see... You know, I'm actually having a hard time remembering so, I... I just... You know, maybe I should go," Ranboo fumbled, trying to hide his flickering, glitching body as it trembled in fear and the desire to phase out of existence.

"It's okay, man. You can hang out if you want!" Tubbo offered.

"No, no, I wouldn't want to... intrude or anything," Ranboo managed.

"Didn't you have something you wanted Ranboo to look over?" Dream's voice cut through the awkwardness and made both boys look at the masked figure who seemed entranced with the chessboard.

"Oh!" Tubbo realized, nearly leaping out of his chair. "Oh my gosh! Thanks, Dream! Wait here, Raboo, I'll be right back! Watch Dream, tell me what move he makes!" the boy grinned.

With that, the boy scrambled out of the room and climbed down a ladder to his downstairs leaving Ranboo alone... with Dream. The room's temperature seemed to drop ten degrees leaving Ranboo's skin crawling.

"You know, Ranboo, I really enjoy chess," Dream commented as his fingers ghosted over his pieces.

"Really?" Ranboo tried to smile but couldn't hide his tail swishing nervously.

Dream nodded, picking up his black bishop. "You have... well you have all of these different pieces, each with their own strength and weaknesses and you have to know how to use them to win. It's... it's a valuable game to learn."

"I'm... not a big player," Ranboo managed.

"Hmm, I think you remind me of a bishop," Dream supposed as he studied the piece in his hand. "You're tall so you see the board rather well, you can make out all the sides and see things as they truly are not as they appear, you stand directly beside the King and Queen, and you can move incredibly quickly... what do you think?"

"I mean... I am tall," Ranboo tried to joke.

Dream wheezed a bit before placing his bishop back down. "The bishop is a powerful piece when used correctly. But, you know, it's like everything else in the world. If you don't know how to use it, then the piece is left defenseless."

With that, Dream picked up a pawn and slid it diagonally, tipping Tubbo's white bishop over off the table and onto the floor. The clatter made Ranboo's heart freeze momentarily as Dream's mask slowly turned and stared at him. They stared at each other for a few moments before heavy footsteps below allowed Ranboo to tear his gaze away. Tubbo had somehow made his way up the ladder with one of his arms full of papers.

"Oh - Tubbo, let me help you with that!" Ranboo forced a smile as he ran over and took the papers out of the President's hands so he could climb the rest of the way.

"Thanks. There are some of the new plans I put together. Quackity liked them but... well... I figure you should look over them," Tubbo grinned.

"I will."

"Thanks! Are you sure you don't need anything else?"

Ranboo's gaze flickered over to where Dream was waiting. "No," he croaked.

"Oh. Okay!" Tubbo shrugged before returning to the chessboard. "What did Dream do?"

"He..." Ranboo cleared his throat and kept his gaze averted. "He took your bishop."

"Oh man," Tubbo moaned.

"You left it open," Dream stated.

"You made your castle bait!" Tubbo objected. "That's... oh, that's not cool."

Tubbo groaned while Dream laughed giving Ranboo enough time to slip out the door and scamper back to his house. There, he sat on the floor and hugged his knees. Shakily, he reached for his journal and took his pencil out, turning to the newest page and slowly scratching out his repetitive notes of: _Tell Tubbo._

Under it, he slowly began writing, his throat unnaturally dry as he tried to still his trembling hand.

_What to do? What do I do? What do I do?_

~~~

Well, after a few restless nights of pacing, Ranboo found himself staring at pages of scribbled journal pages. Plans and schemes had been crossed out while goals were underlined and emphasized. Similar phrases could be made out on every page:

_Save Tommy. Get him away from Dream._

__

__

_Help Tubbo?_

_Dream is still in control._

_The walls are still up, even if we can't see them._

_He's watching?_

_Save Tommy._

_Don't Die_

_Save Tommy._

Ranboo found himself playing through scenarios, acting them out, and rehearsing a plentiful bounty of lines as he paced his room.

"Hey Tommy, we should talk," he managed as he closed his eyes and envisioned the blond. "I know you probably don't want to talk to me, but, well... Dream's a bad guy and he's lying to you. And I wish I could tell you but he scares me and he can hurt you and... this isn't working" Ranboo moaned and gently banged his head on the wall.

He leaned on the wall and just let whatever he was thinking just spew out.

"Hey, Tommy. I don't think Dream's actually your friend."

"Tommy, I think Dream's using you. Think, no I don't think, I'm like... ninety-nine percent certain he is."

"Tommy, you're being lied to."

"Tommy... Tommy... dammit."

Ranboo groaned and hid his face behind his hands. "This is hard," he muttered.

Maybe... maybe he just needed to talk to Tommy. Maybe having him in front of him would help the words come easier. Maybe he was wasting precious time. He hadn't seen Tommy in days, Dream either, which didn't bode well for the situation. 

Ranboo knew two things:

1) He needed to get Tommy away from Dream

2) He needed to do so without Dream immediately knowing what had happened because a manhunt with that masked man would only ever result in failure

So, with a fearful glance and a gentle step, Ranboo crept out of his house and slipped towards the portal leading to the Nether, hoping and praying that he could catch Tommy alone.

~~~

Ranboo, in fact, could not catch Tommy alone. Dream and Tommy seemed attached to each other by this point, Tommy refusing to stray too far from the masked man. They hung around Tommy's camp, for the most part, talking as they constructed Tommy some new weapons that Ranboo was certain Dream would inevitably destroy.

Ranboo hid as best he could, hardly breathing if the duo came too close. He did everything in his power to avoid discovery from Dream. He wasn't exactly someone who excelled at hiding in plain sight so he did his best to maintain some distance, constantly praying that Dream would leave. Surely he had better things to do than torment Tommy?

No... no, it seemed Dream didn't.

It was sunset by the time Dream and Tommy settled down. Ranboo forced himself to creep closer, taking a moment to climb a tree and perch in its branches to stay out of sight. He had a decent vantage point even if he couldn't hear what was being said

The two sat and talked for a while as the scarlet sky gave way to a familiar deep dark blue speckled with stars. Ranboo stayed in the tree, jumping a bit every time a monster groaned or screeched. The enemies were plentiful here, so far away from society and light, their monstrous mutated forms dotting the countryside as they ventured over the moon-lit ground. They wouldn't retreat until the sun returned but the night was long and Ranboo had more than the monsters to fear.

He couldn't help but feel his blood curdle at the thought of being out here undefended. He tightened the strap that attached his netherite armor to his forearms out of pure instinct as a zombie mulled around beneath his tree, oblivious to his presence for the moment.

A distant yelp pulled Ranboo's gaze away from his undead visitor and back to the field where Dream and Tommy were. Tommy was standing amongst a trio of zombies with nothing but a misshapen stone sword to defend himself with. Ranboo's clawed hand immediately flew for his belt where his sword sat at the ready, prepared to rush out there despite the consequences.

Instead, there was a flash of green and white as a familiar godling suddenly appeared between Tommy and the undead, his ax moving like a silver flash of moonlight as it sliced the rotting corpses down. Even from the distance, Ranboo could hear the zombie's dying wails. 

There was something oh so disturbing about watching Dream defend the boy he had made defenseless.

As the two distant figures recovered from their startling skirmish, Ranboo strained to make out how they were reacting. Dream had wrapped an arm around Tommy who seemed to be as spirited as he usually was, thrumming with chaotic energy. Yet, Dream stilled the boy with a hand. Ranboo cursed under his breath as he strained to make any semblance of the conversation on the wind.

Dream had reached into his cloak and pulled out something. Tommy was smiling, it seemed, though from this distance it was hard to tell what sort of smile it was. He was holding whatever pale thing Dream had just handed him and couldn't seem to take his eyes off. Ranboo leaned further, straining to make out what "gift" had just been exchanged.

Dream seemed to volunteer something as Tommy quickly handed the pale thing back and waited patiently. The green-clad man raised the white object and affixed it to the side of Tommy's face, wrapping two bands around Tommy's head and tying them in the back before sitting back and admiring his handiwork.

Ranboo felt like he was going to be sick again as he realized what Tommy now adorned; a mask. A white, expressionless mask. Gods. Oh dear gods.

Dream stood up and began walking towards the portal... towards Ranboo. His heart froze and in absolute terror Ranboo forced himself to stop breathing, to stay as quiet as possible.

Dream moved quickly, Tommy right on his heels as they drew ever closer. Their conversation began to carry and Ranboo's ears twitched to hear Tommy sound so... reverent? It was wrong, so inexplicably wrong for Tommy to sound so happy or thankful for anything, especially from Dream.

"Thanks, man, thanks... you'll be back, right? You'll be back soon?" Tommy asked eagerly, the mask perched on the side of his face, it's two eyes staring blankly at the outside world. Ranboo's gaze was drawn to that ceramic headpiece, his skin crawling as he met its dotted eyes.

"Of course, I just have to wrap up a few loose ends," Dream assured him, veering towards the shimmering veil in obsidian.

"B-but you'll come back big man, right?" Tommy asked again, a bit quieter.

Dream stopped at the threshold, looking back at Tommy and ruffling his hair.

"Of course, Tommy." There was that sickly sweet tone that made Ranboo swallow a snarl. "Stay in the tent, don't be stupid."

"Oh - oh yeah, don't worry, Dream!" Tommy chirped.

Dream gave a firm nod before slipping through the portal leaving Tommy on the other side. Ranboo lay still for a moment, waiting and watching, just in case the green bastard forgot something. Tommy did too, slowly sitting down just outside the portal and watching the swirling mist, biting his lip as he stayed absolutely still. Ranboo hated to think it, but Tommy reminded him of a dog; a stupid, loyal canine that waited patiently by the door for its master to return. 

_No, no, don't think like that. Stop it._ Ranboo clenched his jaw and cursed the thought before taking a breath of the cool night air.

It was just him and Tommy. This was his chance.

Ranboo hopped down from the tree and crept closer. He didn't necessarily mean to sneak up on Tommy, but circumstances being what they were, he wasn't surprised when Tommy jumped to his feet and drew a sword on him.

"Woah, woah, woah! Take it easy there Tommy, it's just me!" Ranboo threw his hands up and put on the best friendly smile he could muster.

"What are you doing here, Ranboo," Tommy demanded. His tone was short and his sword didn't lower. Ranboo forced himself to look at Tommy's eyes, feeling his chest seize a bit at the disturbing eye-contact. Had Tommy's eyes always been that dull? Ranboo could've sworn they were... blue-er? 

"I- I just came to see you, talk a bit if we could," Ranboo tried to sound innocent.

"How long have you been here?" Tommy was sounding more accusing by the second.

"Only... only a little bit. I just... I didn't want to see Dream."

"Yeah? Why not?"

Ranboo sputtered for a moment as he tried to convey just how toxic and dangerous Dream was to everyone around him. He struggled to put into words how terrifying that masked man was. How desperately he wanted to avoid the feeling of a netherite ax tearing through his flesh. How his body threatened to pull him apart and leave his human half behind as the enderman cells cried to leave the place.

"Go away, Ranboo," Tommy sneered, mistaking Ranboo's silence as something sinister. The boy sneered, sheathing his sword and turning to go to the tent.

"Tommy, wait!" Ranboo pleaded, running forward and placing himself in front of Tommy. "Please. Just listen, for a moment."

Tommy crossed his arms and glowered. "Fine. Spit it out."

"No one got your invitations!" Ranboo cried. "No one."

"I don't care about my stupid party, Ranboo," Tommy growled going to push past.

"Listen," Ranboo pleaded as he halted Tommy again. "Wilbur was supposed to deliver your invitations with help from Dream right? So, don't you think it's weird that no one has heard from him since - that the only one to receive an invitation was Dream? Don't you see it Tommy? He's using you! He's manipulating you and - "

"Shut UP!" Tommy screamed shoving Ranboo aside. Ranboo stumbled and fell to the ground, stunned for a moment at the outburst. Tommy wiped his tearing eyes before glaring at Ranboo.

"Dream... Dream is my friend. He wouldn't - " Tommy began.

"He's lying to you!" Ranboo shouted, not even bothering to get up. "He's not on your side!"

That seemed to strike Tommy in all the wrong places. He clenched the handle of his sword and began taking unsteady steps back, his stance changing between confrontational and defensive.

"You... you're just like him," Tommy breathed as Ranboo slowly got to his feet.

"What?"

"SHUT UP!" Tommy cried. "I won't listen! I won't!"

"Please, Tommy," Ranboo took a small step forward.

"STOP IT, WILBUR!" Tommy ordered before realizing what he said. His own words seemed to be a slap in the face because his eyes overflowed and his hands trembled.

"Oh... oh, Tommy," Ranboo breathed taking another step forward.

"Stay AWAY FROM ME!" Tommy yelled. "YOU'RE LYING! You're trying to get between us, everyone's trying to get me away from my friends. So... so don't... just go away."

"Dream's not your friend," Ranboo pleaded.

"He's my friend."

"No! I'm your friend. Tubbo's your friend - "

"TUBBO!?" Tommy challenged, his tears freely falling. "Tubbo hasn't given one shit about me since I've been here!"

Ranboo thought back to those tear-filled nights comforting a distraught president and had no issue refuting that fact. Tubbo had been torn apart these last few weeks.

"He's cared every second you've been out here!" 

"He hates me," Tommy gritted, striding away.

"He misses you," Ranboo corrected desperately, scrambling after Tommy.

"He hates me and doesn't care about me! He broke his compass! HE BROKE IT - "

"It was an accident!"

"BULLSHIT!"

"Whatever Dream's told you, Tommy, I swear it's a lie!"

Tommy had reached his tent and went to stomp inside when his wrist was caught by Ranboo.

"Go away, Ranboo. I don't want... I don't want you here," Tommy gritted through clenched teeth. The only reason Ranboo was able to stand up after that comment was bu telling himself that Tommy didn't mean it. It wasn't Tommy talking, that was Dream's manipulation. He didn't mean it.

"Tommy... you can hate me all you want but please, please just listen - "

Tommy put his head in his free hand and hissed in pain as if Ranboo's pleas were carving daggers in his skull.

"Dream is the reason you're here. He's hurt you and he will continue to hurt you unless we get you away from here! We can get you far away from here before Dream gets back! We can - "

"No, no," Tommy sounded hurt as he pulled away from Ranboo. "No, Dream would be... he'd be pissed."

"Tommy, the fact that you're afraid of him being angry proves my point!"

"Shut up." It was Tommy's turn to plead as he covered his ears and squeezed his eyes closed. "Shut up. Stop it."

"Tommy, he can't... he can't hurt you if we get you out of here." Ranboo tried to push. He could feel the thin ice he was stepping on. It was cracking, threatening to shatter at any moment and take Tommy with it.

"Dream's my friend," Tommy breathed.

"Dream's your jailer." Ranboo gently took a step forward and wondered if he could coax Tommy further. He took another step. His claws were inches away from Tommy's arms. If he could lead him out of here, at least convince him to flee, they could figure out the rest together. He just needed to get Tommy out of here now.

His claws gently wrapped around Tommy's arm and slowly, the boy opened his eyes and stared into Ranboo's emerald and ruby eyes.

"I want to help, Tommy... please... I can help y-" The hairs on the back of Ranboo's neck suddenly stood on end. Every muscle in his body tensed as purple particles danced around him, flickering in and out of the plane. 

_Danger_

Ranboo's eyes danced around the camp, jerking about as they tried to pick up the reason for his gut to drop ten inches into a void.

_Danger. **Dream**_

"I don't want your help," Tommy breathed, oblivious to the panic closing Ranboo's throat. 

"Tommy - wait," Ranboo tried to voice his beg as the boy pulled away and slipped into the tent.

_Please don't leave me alone_

Oh gods, oh gods, oh gods. Ranboo looked all around as he stood outside Tommy's tent. Something was wrong, something was very very wrong. He wasn't safe, he wasn't safe!

_"Let's keep this between friends."_

The mask. 

Ranboo saw that sick, permanent smile staring at him from the edge of the tree line. It gleamed in the moonlight like a fish scale and Ranboo could hardly believe he missed it the first few glances. A cry built in his throat as he debated between sprinting for the portal or getting Tommy.

The mask vanished into the shadows and Raboo's adrenaline made the decision for him.

He sprinted for the portal, his breaths short and quick as he saw enemies in every shadow cast by the moon.

He was a coward. He was a spineless fucking coward and he knew it. Tommy needed his help and here he was running as fast as he could towards that violet threshold. No matter how his mind kicked and screamed for him to turn around, to fight back, his body had control and it was practically flying across the earth.

He reached the portal and scrambled through, glimpsing Dream in a moment of terror at the last possible second before he was stumbling through the familiar hellscape.

Dream was chasing him. Dream was hunting him. Ranboo continued running, his chest heaving as panic and terror sucked all of the oxygen out of his lungs. He tripped once on the cobblestone, stumbling and coughing as his lungs rebelled against the ash and heat trapped in them. Ranboo steadied himself and tried to slow his frantic breathing. Only when he could start to hear things beyond his heartbeat did he hear the scraping.

The high-pitched, absolutely terrible sound of metal grating against the cobblestone.

Even while everything in Ranboo's head screamed at him to not look back, to continue running, to move, his body could help but twist to find the source.

Emerging from the red mist that curled above the lava was a familiar porcelain mask. Dream walked ever slowly as he approached, yet every step was large and silent making Ranboo's heart feel like it was going to combust. Dragging on the ground beside the masked man was a shimmering ax that looked black as coal in the dim glow of the lava, throwing up sparks as it sliced through the stone path.

Ranboo felt terror run through his body like an icy spike of energy that propelled him forward and left him sprinting down the cobblestone and clay, back towards L'Manburg. Ghasts easily spotted him and spat their fireballs at the boy who didn't dare slow. Nothing, nothing could compare to the nightmare taking chase.

He reached the L'Manburg portal and took a moment to look around, gauge what sort of lead he had. 

The path was empty.

Ranboo panicked, he whirled around and scanned all of his surroundings, yet Dream was gone. There was no sign of the godling. Ranboo's chest felt like it was constricting around his heart that was trying desperately to escape his ribs, banging and throwing itself against them like a trapped animal.

He took an uncertain step back towards the portal, trying to calm his racing mind. He hardly noticed the arrow lodging into his calf until pain shot up his body and he stumbled, screaming for a moment as he looked around for his attacker.

He thought he heard a laugh permeate through the mist as he limped through the portal, clutching his bleeding leg. He stumbled onto the black stone on the other side of the portal, unable to appreciate the fresh cool air of the overworld as his lungs could hardly remember how to breathe.

_RUN_

He dragged himself away from the portal, gasping with every pained step and trying miserably to refrain from looking back.

_**RUN** _

He wanted to scream for help but words got caught in his closing throat. He could hardly hear his own thoughts over the drumming of his heart. His mind was a blur of panic and fog, any train of thought was truly lost to the constant hum of adrenaline and terror.

He was so discombobulated that when the half-enderman turned a corner too sharply and slammed into someone else, he couldn't help but let out a chilling screech of terror that sounded startling familiar to the call of the teleporting horrors that haunted so many children's dreams.

"Hey! Hey... Ranboo, what's wrong?" 

That wasn't Dream. It wasn't Dream. Ranboo realized he had closed his eyes and thrown up his hands defensively, he now lowered his armored appendages and found himself looking down at a friendly, yet slightly concerned, Philza.

"Ph-Philza, hey," Ranboo greeted, somehow managing to find a voice that didn't squeak in panic.

Those intelligent eyes of blue looked him up and down, settling on the arrow lodged in his calf. Philza gave a small nod as he straightened his striped hat and came beside Ranboo, supporting his injured leg and helping him limp across the wooden boards and up the stairs. About halfway of the journey, with Ranboo's house right insight, the boy risked a glance back.

Dream was through the portal. His green cloak flowed behind him as the hunter moved with the steady pace of a predator who knew its prey was out of stamina.

"Hey, eyes forward, come on," Philza's voice was grounding, strangely. The man's grip tightened on Ranboo's figure as he picked up the pace, practically dragging Ranboo across the boards and into the man's house.

Suddenly, Ranboo felt a bit safe. Somehow, Phil seemed to know what was going on.

Phil's house was simple and logical, the house of an efficient survivalist. A survivor who basically kicked his door open, threw Ranboo inside, and then bolted the door shut. He took a long look out the window, his blue eyes narrowing as he likely watched Dream's approach.

"Is he coming?" Ranboo asked, a bit breathless. He had stumbled to the nearest chair and was now sitting in it feeling like he had run a marathon, his green and red blood mixing into a brownish liquid that was spilling on to Phil's nice floor.

"No, not yet," Philza answered softly before opening the chest below the window and pulling out a handful of bandages. He worked quickly, methodically removing the netherite armor and tearing Ranboo's pants apart at the lower seam, splitting them down the middle of the leg so as to not disturb the arrow that had slipped in just under Ranboo's armor.

Ranboo hissed a bit but stayed quiet as Phil worked. His eyes flashing to the wooden door that he was certain was going to open any second to reveal that porcelain smile before the world went cold. An involuntary shiver went up Ranboo's spine at the thought.

Maybe... maybe he had left. Given up the chase. Ranboo could hope.

... Except, if Dream had given up, then he would go back to Tommy. 

Gods, Tommy. Ranboo shuddered and pressed his forehead into his palms until he was sure he had left indents. He'd made it worse. He was sure he had made it worse. Tommy was going to be hurt because of him. Because he hadn't listened - NO! No, don't think like that. This was Dream's fault. He was trying to get in Ranboo's head and it was working.

"Breath," Philza instructed. "This is gonna hurt like a bitch."

"Wha-" Ranboo looked down right as Phil took a knife to the arrowhead, splitting the skin. Ranboo swallowed a scream, his nails flying to the chair's arms, scratching against the wood and sending splinters under his nails. Tears threatened to fall as Phil wrestled with the deep arrow.

"This was shot by a nasty piece of work," Phil gritted before he managed to get a good hold on the arrow and gently dislodge it out in its entirety. He took a breath upon seeing the tip was still there and gave Ranboo a warm smile. "You're good."

Ranboo let out a long breath as he collected himself.

He was okay. It was okay...

Then someone knocked on the door.


	3. A Double-Edged Sword

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *chanting*  
> Philza angst! Philza angst! Philza angst! DADZA ANGST!  
> Also, LORE~

Philza liked to think he was prepared. There was always a backup plan, or a last resort sort of deal, just in case the world decided to turn on its head. He had a plethora of incredibly powerful backup plans at his disposal, unfortunately for everyone else, those backup plans were usually solely for him. He didn't exactly have a reason to plan for having to save someone else. 

When he had run into Ranboo, it was clear the boy was being chased and that he had been running for a while. His leg was covered in red and green blood and his breaths sounded more like bursts of wind than actual exhales. Then, Phil saw the nether portal in the distance flicker as someone stepped through.

Phil only needed to see the green to know who was hunting Ranboo. Dream. Fucking Dream.

Well, he wasn't just going to let Ranboo get slaughtered on his doorstep, so he intervened. He could almost hear Techno's exasperated sigh.

_"You should stop getting involved with this stuff, Phil."_

Yeah, yeah. Fuck it. He wasn't just going to let people get murdered in cold blood like animals. He'd seen enough of that recently.

The black and white boy was moments away from blind panic as his eyes bore a hole of terror into the door where the knock had resonated from. His red and green eye, though different colors, both churned with the familiar emotion of fear.

Good, he was smart to be afraid right now.

Phil wasn't going to pretend this was a fucking picturesque situation. He pushed a wad of gauze on the open wound and guided Ranboo's clawed hand to the clot.

"Listen to me, just apply pressure and keep quiet," Philza instructed, hoping Ranboo could keep his cool. He stood up, stowing the arrow that had been lodged in Ranboo's leg behind a chest before he opened the door a small crack. "Hello?"

Dream's mask was staring back at him, its smile as unsettling as ever. 

"Hey, Phil," Dream greeted cordially. Philza narrowed his eyes at the nickname. Friends called him Phil. Dream did not. 

"Dream, hello, what brings you here?" Philza returned the courtesy, being careful to block any visual of Ranboo from Dream's mask.

"I need to talk to Ranboo," Dream answered. It was strange how calm and emotionless the masked man could be, though not surprising. Being such a powerful being came with its setbacks. Almost subconsciously, Phil shifted his shoulder blades, missing the familiar weight that so long had hung there.

"Ranboo? What do you want with him?"

"To talk," Dream reiterated.

Philza chortled.

"I know he's here," Dream stated sharply as if daring Philza to refute.

Philza only shrugged. "Yeah, he's here, but he's kind of... occupied," he ended with his voice rising into a laugh as he leaned on the doorframe casually.

"It'll only be a moment," Dream promised lightly.

Philza chuckled. "Sure."

"Let me in," Dream ordered, his voice still gentle but Philza didn't miss the way Dream's stance had grown taller, his muscles tensing for a fight.

"No," Philza answered simply. "No, I don't think I will."

Something in the air seemed to sharpen as Phil stared down the emotionless mask. The world grew silent and still, holding its breath in horror. Dream seemed to radiate power, the world shifting around him as if everything on the earth was warning about the man's capability to inflict pain. 

Phil didn't move. He didn't even blink. His arms remained crossed as he regarded the porcelain masl with a level of distaste.

"Philza, you're... you're being rather difficult," Dream's laugh was low, making some small voice in the back of Phil's head scream danger. Phil proceeded to kindly tell that little voice to fuck off and continued his stare down.

"I'm told being difficult is one of my many perks," Philza grinned. "Now, if you don't mind, I have some completely random excuses to make up for why you can't come in, so goodbye."

He went to close the door when Dream's hand caught the thick slab of wood.

"Just pass along a little message to Ranboo then, would you?" Dream asked simply, his voice still low which made Phil's skin crawl.

"Sure," Philza conceded, narrowing his gaze.

"Tell him to stay away from my things," Dream's voice seemed to fly right past Philza, directed at the wounded refugee who was sitting at Philza's table.

"Alright. Goodbye!" Phil waved, forcing a smile as he closed the door. Sighing, he adjusted his hat and walked towards the window, watching carefully as the green-clad hunter walked down the wooden streets of L'Maburg and out of sight. Only when Philza was certain that the godling had left did he turn back towards Ranboo.

"Well, he's gone!" Phil smiled cheerfully.

Ranboo was flickering like a malfunctioning redstone light. Philza had encountered plenty of endermen before, the tall mishappen mutations were some twisted humanoids gifted with the ability to teleport and a terrible affinity for lashing out when frightened or angry. Ranboo's current state reminded Phil a bit too much of the tall monstrosities screeching with their unhinged jaw and broken voicebox.

"You're sure?" Ranboo asked carefully, his voice glitching

Philza glanced back at the window just to make certain.

"Yep," he affirmed. "Now let's finish patching up that leg."

He snatched up the bandages he had put aside and set himself back to carefully wrapping the ugly cross-bolt wound. The bolt had sunk deep in the flesh, likely propelled by some enchantment and, unfortunately, there was no fire enchantment to cauterize the wound meaning the deep wound bled profusely like a crimson spring. Luckily, there wasn't any sickly yellow puss or ugly miscolored flesh to signify infection or poison. It was a ghastly wound, but hardly something to panic over.

He had seen so much worse.

_"Sit still" he ordered sharply as he ripped the hemming of his robe apart. He brought the strip of cloth above the bleeding laceration in the teen's arm, trying that cloth as tight as he could, ignoring the pained screams that emerged from the boy's throat. The blood was rushing like a river, puddling at his knees. Fuck, there was so much!_

__

_"S'too tight!" the boy hissed, his breaths coming short and strained. Phil tried not to look at the other wounds. He'd address those in a moment but he had to keep the kid from bleeding out first!_

_"Godsdammit, Techno, what were you thinking?" Phil demanded, hating how his voice shook. The boy's pig-like appearance began fading away into that familiar soft-boy face, his eyes a bright crimson like the blood that covered him with only his tusks signifying his hybrid status._

_"Did I get them all?" Techno asked, looking over to Philza expectantly with those red eyes that were hazy with pain._

_Slowly, Phil forced himself to look beyond the teenage godling for a moment and see the carnage left in his wake._

_"I... think so, bud," Philza murmured, his voice cracking._

_"Ha," Techno cackled, staring at the sky. "See? See you guys? I could do it."_

_Thousands of whispers filled Phil's head as he continued to treat the boy. None of them were directed at him but all whispered at the young warlord. Some cheered, some soothed, some mocked, but most just chanted. Chanted and chanted and -_

"Hey... Phil... That's kind of tight," Ranboo's voice pulled Philza away from the memory. Phil looked up at Ranboo and found the kid grimacing. Philza laughed as he finished up the bandage and gave the leg a pat which made Ranboo wince.

"Sorry mate, but it should be just fine, you'll be better after a healing potion and a good night's sleep," Phil smiled as he stood up and went to put everything back in its proper placement.

"...Thanks."

Phil glanced back upon Ranboo's tone that fell a bit too flat into the "depression" zone of conversation. The boy had his eyes down on the floor and his hands in his lap clamped together like vices.

"So..." Phill instigated, pulling a collection of glass bottles out of his chests, their clinking sounded a bit like the bells that hung around Ghostbur's house. "What was all that about? Dream and all that? You take something of his?"

"What? NO! No, no, no I..." Ranboo's voice tampered out making Phil glance back at the boy as he filled the bottles with water.

"Well, whatever it was, maybe don't do it again. Dream was absolutely going to try and cut you in two," Philza chuckled. He wrestled with the bottles for a moment, plugging them into the tubes of the brewing stand before fetching some nether wart.

Ranboo was unusually silent as Phil compiled the ingredients for a healing potion together. Phil didn't press. He kept his eyes on the gilded melon that was slowly being melted down into a thick pinkish liquid that shimmered as it boiled, filling the house with a strangely pleasant fruity smell.

"He was talking about Tommy."

Phliza's hand almost slipped up as he picked up a vial of glowstone. He caught his fumble and took a breath, his mouth suddenly very dry.

"Tommy?" Philza asked as he turned and looked back to Ranboo.

"Yeah," Ranboo's voice sounded parched as he nodded.

Phil felt something catch in the back of his throat.

"What... well, what happened with Tommy?" Phil tried to hide the painful curiosity that was making his hands start to tremble.

Ranboo laughed mirthlessly, almost spitefully. "It's too late."

Philza poured the shimmering golden glowstone into the potion mixture, watching the liquid take on a more brilliant sheen.

"Too late for what?" 

Ranboo seemed to choke on his next words, hiding his face in his hands and shuddering. "... I can't... I can't, I'm not supposed to say but he's tried to kill me once and I - I can't remember if he said he was gonna do it again but he's hurting Tommy and I can't... I can't stop him."

"How's he hurting Tommy?" Philza tried to keep himself from demanding but his knuckles were growing white as he clenched the bottle.

"He's... it's all manipulation and... and - like brainwashing or something."

Philza had to force himself to be still so as not to drop the potion he was removed from the brewing stand.

"What?" Gods, did Phil's voice really just crack? Was he that delicate?

"Dream's gotten into his head, he doesn't - he doesn't think anyone's on his side anymore. Of course, you know, it doesn't help him when no one visits and no one cares and everyone pretends it's all fine while he's left getting - I mean, I mean he's just left all alone with that... psychopath."

Phil felt the blood drain from his head as he clenched the healing potion. Ranboo was still hiding his face in his hands.

"I tried to tell him Dream was using him but... well... you saw how that went," Ranboo sighed.

Philza walked over and gently handed Ranboo one of the healing potions. 

"Drink this," Philza murmured. "It'll help hurry up the healing process."

Ranboo took the vial that fit neatly into his large claws before drinking the contents. He blinked a few times as the substance likely gave him that usual high before he hissed and held his leg.

"Yeah, it's gonna hurt a bit," Philza soothed. "And you're gonna be exhausted in a minute or two."

Potions were a good short-term solution, but their drawbacks could be severe. They drained the consumer's energy and depending on their purpose could have some detrimental side effects if the person wasn't fit enough. Healing potions expedited the healing process but caused major fatigue and made the wounds hurt like a bitch as they stitched themselves together. Using Healing Potions was a risk, but Ranboo was cognitive, fit, and healthy despite the hole in his calf. He could handle the drawbacks of the substance.

A few minutes passed as Ranboo clutched his leg, breathing heavily as his wound doubtlessly burned like hell. Philza watched him carefully, his eyes on the wound but his mind completely engulfed with thoughts of Tommy. There were too many questions, too many doubts.

As the potion's effects came to a close, Ranboo let out a long breath of relief as he sat up, a weak smile on his face.

"Oh, that's better..."

"You feel alright?" Philza asked.

"I mean... kind of," Ranboo murmured. "Yeah - yeah, I'm alright."

"Good, how about you crash upstairs. I've got some stuff to do. You'll be safer here than at home."

Ranboo seemed to bristle at the thought of returning home alone with a known hunter out for his blood.

"Would you... would you be alright with that?" Ranboo asked uncertainly. Philza smiled gently as he looked to the tall half-breed, trying his best to look as gentle as possible.

"Yes, go take the bed. I have some things I've been wanting to work on."

Ranboo looked out the window at the night sky and nodded. "... Thanks again, Philza."

"No problem, mate." 

Ranboo moved towards the ladder that led to the upstairs while Philza forced himself to find something to do. He needed to move his hands, busy his mind.

What did Ranboo mean? How was Tommy? Was he alright? Should he go see him? Was Dream there? Why would Dream be with Tommy?

"Phil..." Ranboo's fluctuating voice broke through the thoughts and pulled Philza back to the present where Ranboo was standing uncertainly by the ladder.

"What's up?"

"Were you... were you and Tommy close?" Ranboo asked.

Philza felt like he had a literal rock in his chest. His throat suddenly felt like the desert as he cracked out his answer. "We... we were, once."

_Bright, brilliant eyes; the large wondering eyes of a child that stared up at him in absolute awe. There were little stars reflected in that bright blue void of iris. Freckles covered the baby's soft face and small pudgy hands reached for the large grey wings that wrapped around the two._

__

__

_Phil held the boy closer, bundling him in the blanket as he felt his chest warm with the absolute desire to protect the child. His wings instinctively wrapped around the two of them, like an extra set of arms to hold the boy._

_His little Tommy._

"He... he talked about you... you know, before Dream got to him," Ranboo explained, somewhat timid.

Those words somehow both warmed Phil's chest while also stabbing him in the heart. He had to lean on a wall to stay steady as a familiar bout of unsteadiness came over him. His back was too light... he was missing something.

Ah, that's right. He flexed his empty shoulders and let out a long breath.

"Did he?" he managed.

"He... he wanted to talk to you, about something, I think," Ranboo nodded. "But, that was a long time ago and I never got the chance to tell you."

Philza knew what long-awaited words sounded like. This had been weighing on Ranboo's tongue for a while now.

"It's... it's okay, mate." It took everything in Phil's power to turn his attention back to the brewing stand and not break down. He was not going to break down. He was fine. He was perfectly fine.

The silence that hung in the air seemed to strangle Phil for all he was worth. He almost found himself begging Ranboo to talk again. He tried to bring himself to speak but as he connected another water bottle to the brewing stand he found his throat clenched, refusing to make a sound.

"Why didn't you visit?" Ranboo's voice was barely above a whisper.

This time, one of the bottles did slip from Philza's had, falling to the table only for a moment before Philza snatched it up again. He felt like a coward... keeping his back turned to Ranboo, unable to face him less the boy saw his failed attempt to keep himself composed.

He leaned on the table that held the brewing stand and squeezed his eyes shut.

"I... I'm sorry. I'll go now," Ranboo frantically excused.

"I was... scared," Philza managed finally. He still was scared, he still couldn't turn around to look Ranboo in the face.

"What? Why?" Ranboo demanded. Phil managed a dry smirk at the curiosity painfully evident in the boy's voice.

"It's..." Philza began.

_"Look. You were never there, alright? I didn't need you then and I don't need you now."_

"It's complicated," he finished with a pained breath.

They stood in silence for a while longer. Ranbo shifting foot to foot, making the wooden planks beneath his feet squeak in protest.

"Okay... thank you, again... " Ranboo murmured awkwardly.

The squeaking of wood informed Phil that the half-breed had climbed the ladder and the muffled footsteps from above ensured that the boy was indeed heading to bed.

Poor kid was probably exhausted. It was late...

And he'd almost been killed by a godling.

It was only after silence returned that Philza allowed himself to crumble a bit. He leaned on the table and released a shaky breath, feeling his eyes grow warm and watery as bitter-sweet memories played in his mind. A few renegade tears slipped down his face before he forced himself up again, wiping them away swiftly.

No time for this.

He cleaned the blood from the floor, scrubbing the red and green away until his wooden floors were spotless. He replaced everything he'd taken from the chests and organized a bit. He finished brewing a collection of potions and stowed those away too.

Then he was alone in the silence, with nothing to do.

There was nothing to be done that couldn't wait for tomorrow. Nothing he could do that wouldn't wake Ranboo. The silence was torturous; it rang in Phil's head and wrapped around his head like a suffocating veil. Even with the crackling of the fire, the silence reminded Philza of too many silent days... too many lonely times. Times when he should've been somewhere else.

Gods he hated it.

He couldn't sleep either. His chest was too fluttery, his mind too rampant, any attempt would only leave him surrounded by the silence until morning.

He looked over at the fireplace, watching the flames flicker for a moment before his eyes drifted to the chest beside the fire. He hardly noticed he had moved before he was opening the chest and pulling out the familiar blade. His hands trembled as he unwrapped the sword from the cloth it had been tied with, the diamond blade shimmering in the warm firelight. Phil stared at the moving textures thrown on the blade, his breaths so soft he may have well just held them.

_His diamond sword flickered in the torchlight as he looked into the shadows. His sharp sight would surely pick out a child's silhouette on the horizon, even in this moonless night._

_"I wouldn't bother," a villager explained as he walked up beside Philza. "That siren's long gone."_

__

__

_Philza clenched his jaw as he glared at the man. "There is a CHILD out there!"_

_"That wasn't a normal child," the villager scowled. "It was a thief and a monster. A freak of nature."_

__

_Philza's wings flared on instinct as he felt some of his pent-up rage snap. "What do I look like to you?!!" He knew he looked intimidating with his large backdrop of grey feathers, but the villager didn't flinch._

_"We would've cast you out too had you come to us as a child. But now you come to us in armor and with a blade. We are powerless to stop you." The villager's blasé tone was trying and beating him over the head was becoming a tempting option for Philza._

_"Which way did you send him!?" Philza ordered. His thoughts raced to the little boy he had seen earlier that day. He must've hardly been five with those big bright brown eyes and a messy mop of curly brown hair that hung on his head like a bright little cloud._

_"Sirens belong to the sea," the villager stated cryptically, pointing towards the distant shimmering of the sea as the stars flickered in their reflections._

_Philza felt his heart clench as he stared at the thick woodland that separated the mountain village from the shore._

_"That - That forest is a fucking breeding ground for monsters!!" Philza was shouting now, hardly able to hear himself over the sound of his beating heart. He only thought of the child. The happy little child sitting on the corner of the gravel streets, strumming a beaten guitar as he sang his little heart now. His young voice had been something enchanting and enthralling... in retrospect, there had been somewhat other-worldly about it, but..._

_But why was that a death sentence?!_

_"You basically put the kid in the monster's fridge and said 'grab a snack'!" Phil was fuming._

_The villager only shrugged with a stupid 'hmm' that almost made Phil beat the shit out of him._

_"Fuck this, I'm bringing the kid back... and don't expect to see my emeralds near this hellhole again!" Phil yelled that last bit as he launched himself into the sky, his giant wings carrying him into the cool night._

Phil pulled a chair close to the fire and placed the diamond blade in his lap, his fingers running along the edge experimentally.

_He came down with a fierce yell, his sword plunging right through the head of the skeleton that crumbled into dust and bones at his feet. His wings shot out knocking a zombie and another skeleton away while his other arm brought up his shield, deflecting an arrow._

_The fight was over in a matter of minutes leaving Phil panting and wiping congealed zombie blood off of his cheek. He took a breath of relief before remembering just why he had been fighting. He whirled around in a panic, scanning the earth before his gaze landed on a tree behind which he saw a single little elbow peeking out._

_"You can come out now, they're gone for the most part," Philza called. "It's alright!"_

_Slowly, big eyes peered around the tree and Phil smiled. Crouching down so he was eye-level he gestured for the kid to come closer, making sure to keep his wings tucked against his back so he could look a bit smaller._

_The lanky kid crept out, clutching their battered guitar close to their body. Phil almost snickered to see that the kid had quite literally been willing to die with their instrument._

_"You okay?" Phil asked._

_"...I think so," the kid murmured as he risked coming a few steps closer._

_Phil shifted a bit as his wings slipped into a more comfortable position._

_"What's your name?" Phil asked warmly._

_"Wilbur..." the boy murmured. "Soot. Wilbur Soot."_

Phil shakily reached into his cloak and pulled out a whetstone. With a vial in his cloak, he put a bit of oil atop the stone, laying it on his lap in a way that he surely would've scolded Techno for had he seen the boy try and sharpen a sword in his lap.

He didn't care at the moment. 

Slowly and methodically, he began to pass the blade over the stone at an angle. It filled the house with a soft scraping sound as he slowly repeated the process over and over again. Running the blade up that angle again and again. He couldn't help but see Wilbur in its reflection.

__

_Wilbur was jumping in the stream, he always did love water, chasing after frogs and laughing jubilantly as he splashed Phil. "GOT YOU, DAD!"_

Dad... that word tasted like ash in Phil's mouth now. Philza pushed the sword a bit harder. Sparks started flying.

__

_"Dad! Teach me how to hold a sword! I wanna learn to fight!"_

Phil had agreed... he'd taught him, wrapping his large hands around the boy's smaller ones as he brought the blade up before the boy. Now... now his hands couldn't stop shaking as he polished the blade.

__

_'I wonder if you'd be proud of me'_

Simple words on parchment that seemed to break Phil every time he thought of them. He had been proud. He'd always been proud! He'd... he'd always been proud.

__

_"Kill me, Phil."_

No. No this wasn't working! Phil looked at the sword and realized he was breathing heavily. He quickly looked around for one of his other sharpening whetstones and grabbed one before returning to the fireside. He clenched the sword's handle as he began sharpening the blade once more.

Fast. Quick. Rapid strokes that sent small sparks flying. The rough rock in Phil's hand was uneven and it dug under his nails as he clenched it. The pain was a welcome distraction... but it didn't quell the memories.

_"Who is this?" Techno asked as he scowled at Wilbur. Little Wilbur was gazing up at the immortal in awe and wonder._

_"This is Wilbur," Philza smiled proudly._

_"I'm Wilbur!" Wilbur agreed as he offered a hand up to Techno. "Who are you?"_

_Techno huffed and looked to Philza expectantly as if he wanted Philza to take charge of the situation. Phil only raised an eyebrow and watched as the immortal warlord reluctantly took his boy's hand and shook it._

_"I'm Technoblade," Techno muttered._

_"OH! You're Techno!! Dad talks about you!"_

_"Uh oh, Phil, what did you tell your child?" Techno smirked in mock horror._

__

_Phil only chuckled._

_"Did Phil take care of you too?" Wilbur asked blatantly with a smile. "That's what Dad said, that he took care of you when you were little!"_

_Techno gave a gruff nod as he looked uncertainly to Phil. There may have been a hint of betrayal in the man's eyes._

_"So... you're like his kid?" Wilbur asked. "Which makes you a brother, right"_

_"Heh? What!? No!" Techno looked as if he'd just been doused with a bucket of ice water._

_Phil couldn't help but burst out laughing_

Harder. Phil clenched the stone and grit his teeth as he continued to sharpen the blue blade.

_"Bye-bye, Techno!!!" little seven-year-old Wilbur laughed as he stood on the fence and waved to the distant Techno who's figure had disappeared down the road._

_Phil stood beside Wilbur, watching the empty road with an empty sort of feeling in his heart. Techno had gone off again to find new adventure... it was odd for Phil to not be going with him..._

_"Dad?" Wilbur's voice pulled him from his thoughts._

_"Yes?" Phil smiled._

_"Did you want to go too?"_

_"Hmm?"_

_"With Techno?" Wilbur asked. "Did you want to go with Techno? Cause we can go! I won't be a bother! We can go and do all that fun stuff that you did before. We'll start another Antarctic Empie and - "_

_"Who told you about that?" Philza was almost horrified._

_"Techno," Wilbur smirked as he jumped down from the fence._

_Of course._

_"No, no I don't want to go with Techno," Phil surprised himself by finding that was the truth. His wings weren't longing for a stretch and his heart was yearning for a fight. He was perfectly happy right here... with Wilbur. Worried for Techno, naturally, but he was happy here._

The stone slipped from Phil's grasp momentarily and tumbled to the ground. Phil flexed his fingers for a moment, moving the stiffness out of them before he reached for it and resumed his work, eyes cold and distant as he looked back to the shimmering blade.

_"This... this is..." Philza smiled as he showed Wilbur the little head of blonde hair. "Well, I think his name is Tommy."_

_"Tommy?" Wilbur's eyebrows furrowed. "Why Tommy? I just named my new song Tommy-boy. Is that why you named him Tommy?... Did... Did I name Tommy?"_

_Philza laughed and used his free hand to ruffle the boy's head. It was a strange coincidence - and Phil wasn't one to often believe in coincidences._

_"'I guess so, mate."_

_"Where'd he come from?" Wilbur asked, crinkling his nose as he peered at the sleeping baby._

_"Same place you did," Philza smiled, hiding the bit of pain in his voice._

_The woods. The wild. Abandoned like Wilbur to the elements because... well, who knew why. An unloved and absolutely defenseless child left to the monsters and mutations of this hellish world._

_Phil could've been sick at the thought._

_"Oh, he came from the monster fridge," Wilbur murmured in understanding. His funny little vocabulary made Philza snicker._

_Tommy then stirred and slowly opened his eyes, their brilliant blue sheen immediately locking with Wilbur's large brown ones._

_"...Hi," Wilbur whispered eagerly. "Hi, Tommy!"_

_Suddenly, Phil forgot about everything except those two. Those beautiful, wonderful boys that he swore, he SWORE he was going to protect. He had sworn... and he still failed._

Phil couldn't see any longer, there were tears dripping down his face but still, he sharpened. His back ached with longing for his missing wings, his fingers were stiff and ached, his fingertips were being rubbed raw, but Phil noticed nothing. He was blind to all of his pain.

This was nothing. It was nothing.

_He was bleeding._

_There was so... so much. He held his side and stumbled to the cave wall, coughing up thick crimson that choked his curses out of his throat. He fell to his knees and tried to scream as the impact send pain rocketing through his bones. There must've been something... maybe a lot of somethings broken._

_The corpse of the giant black spider lay a few feet away. It was strewn on its back with its thin skeletal legs in the air, one of the twig-like legs still twitching. The creeper lay inches away, its twisted green body covered in dark black blood that stunk of sulfur and ash._

_And the baby zombie? That terrifying abomination of an undead child? That was at Phil's feet. It's small pudgy face slashed open and burned by Phil's sword, its thick congealed blood leaking out of the charred body, mixing with Phil's crimson puddle that was slowly growing around him._

_There was too much blood._

_Phil hacked up another pool of blood from his lungs and spat it out, hunching over and shivering as his stomach twisted and curled. His wings tried to curl around him but the left one remained motionless, twisted, and bent in so many wrong ways. Phil tried to nudge it with his arm which sent a bout of agony racing through Philza's back. He bit down on his knuckles to muffle his next scream._

_He couldn't fight anything off if it came this way. Not like this._

_Potions would do nothing at this state except hasten the process. He knew if he downed a regeneration body, the fatigue would kill him even if blood loss didn't. He knew that. Nothing... nothing could stop this. His vision was fading and he cursed louder._

_Not like this... Not like this!!_

_"DAD!?" Wilbur's call echoed off the cave walls and Phil felt his slow-beating heart quicken for only a moment before his vision faded further._

_"Will?" he called weakly._

_"DAD!" Wilbur's footsteps were suddenly very loud and someone was shaking him - GODS it hurt. But the hurt was fading... that was good... No... no, wait, that was bad._

_"Dad! Philza! Phil hang on!" Wilbur was sobbing. Phil forced himself to open his eyes and found Wilbur rummaging through his bag pulling out random potions as thick tears streamed down his face._

_"Will," Philza rasped._

_Wilbur must have not heard him because he only choked and continued to rummage._

_"Will!" Philza tried a little louder._

_"Phil! Phil," Wilbur sobbed, his hands finding Phil's bloodied ones. "What do I do? What do I do, how do I fix this!?"_

_Phil summoned what strength he had left and clenched Wilbur's hand._

_"Take..." he broke into a fit of coughing, each exhale made his side explode in agony and there was only more blood pouring into his lungs. Gods, he felt like he was drowning._

_"Phil..." Wilbur's voice was too delicate. Too broken. The teen looked like he was a glass pane about to shatter._

_"Take care... of Tommy," Philza begged. He was crying, his tears mixing with the blood pouring from a wound in his head._

_"No..." Wilbur's voice was so distant Philza strained to hear it. "No, no, NO! No! You're gonna be fine! I have a healing potion! I - I have regen, I just have to - "_

_Philza forced himself to sit up and cup Wilbur's face. He hated how his handprints left bloody stains on the boy's face, hated how Wilbur's tears were mixing with his blood._

_Godsdammit all, why did he have to die now. They NEEDED him. These kids NEEDED him!_

_He pressed a shaky kiss onto Wilbur's forehead before pressing their heads together. Wilbur was sobbing... shaking and sobbing like he was a child again... and not near-adult._

_"I'm sorry," Philza murmured weakly. The pain was going away... so was his vision... so was Wilbur. "I'm so sorry... I'll find you... I swear..."_

_And the pain was gone._

_The price he paid for god-like powers... no second chances... no second lives... a death in a world meant he left it forever..._

_He left his boys there..._

Phil took a moment to wipe his eyes, taking long shaky breaths. He pulled his hand away and froze.

Blood.

There was blood on his hands.

There was blood on the sword.

__

_"Phil! Kill me!!"_

Phil's throat was closing again. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't fucking _breathe_.

__

_"Look! They all want you to!"_

Philza's fingers were bleeding, small trickles of crimson falling on the blade and smearing along the sides. He'd clenched the whetstone for too long and too harshly. It had cut through his calluses drawing forth the crimson that now covered his hands and blade...

But... all Phil could see was Wilbur. Wilbur's blood. It was covering him.

He saw Wilbur in his arms. Bloodied and battered. Smiling. SMILING!

__

_"Kill me"_

Phil cried out in a mix of anguish and anger. He dropped the blade to the ground with a clatter and held his head in his bloodied hands. He couldn't... he couldn't take this. 

"Dammit," he breathed as he failed to compose himself. "Dammit."

The tears kept coming and unable to stop them, Phil could only sit and suffer through wave after wave of memories.

He...

He could remember the first time he saw his boys after he had abandoned them to his own stupid death. Wilbur had grown so big. He was tall and lean, but healthy and happy. He had a spark in his eye and a smirk on his lips that had instilled so much pride and joy in Philza.

Tommy was... Gods it had hurt to see it. He was so big. Gone was the chubby helpless baby swaddled in blankets and in its place was a rambunxious teenager who seemed to fear nothing. His hair was wild just as he was, windswept and the color of sunshine. He too was lanky, tall for his age but still healthy, and his smile had been just as bright as Wilburs.

He remembered spying them in the middle of a busy street in some bustling world that nearly everyone passed through at some point. He knew it was Wilbur and well, he could assume that the blonde was Tommy. He wasn't sure about the third boy but he really didn't care. His wings had never moved him so fast. He practically had collided with the two of them, saying sorry and praising how much they'd grown.

But... but they'd grown. They'd grown without him. They had to. They had to because he had failed. He had died and abandoned them, like every other dick that had before him.

Gods, he hated it. He hated himself for it. He hated those times when he could see how heavy the world was on Wilbur's shoulders, how hard the boy must've pushed himself to raise Tommy and the adoptee Tubbo and provide for the two of them. He hated how he couldn't lift that mantle from Wil's shoulders.

He hated how he was never there.

It hurt.

It hurt watching Tommy brag about his accomplishments to Wilbur... because Philza meant nothing to him. It hurt because how could Phil expect any different? Tommy didn't know him, didn't care about him, there was no expectation that Tommy should affiliate with Philza because... well... he never knew Philza.

Philza had abandoned him. 

But... but Phil was still so proud. He had been so proud.

Wilbur had taken in another stray; Tubbo. Philza couldn't help but wonder if that was some of him rubbing off on the boy - but then again Wilbur had always possesed a big heart.

Tubbo had been found in a cardboard box, another abandoned child who couldn't remember where he came from or how he got there. He was a gentle soul who had grown up with Tommy, but like Tommy, he had no reason to know or care for Phil.

It was...

It was like a double-edged sword. Yes, Phil had been happy, relieved even, that they were happy, but it hurt to know they got there without him, that they had been forced to find happiness without someone there for them. Yes, he had been happy that they had found themselves but he was sad that he had never been able to see them grow.

He was... obsolete.

He no longer mattered and that had hurt, so he had left again. Left them to their own devices like the bastard he was.

And then... and then...

__

_"Kill me! Phil! PLEASE!"_

Oh gods... Oh gods.

Philza's tears weren't slowing. He had killed Wilbur.

His. Son.

Philza may as well been sobbing, except he had enough control to keep it absolutely silent. He sat hunched in his chair, his tears falling silently into his lap.

He'd taken away the only thing that had kept his family intact. He'd taken away the man who had raised Tommy and Tubbo. The man who had held so much on his shoulders. His boy, his little stupid bright boy... Gods.

__

_"Look. You were never there, alright? I didn't need you then and I don't need you now."_

That was what Tommy had said. He hadn't been angry - that had been the worst part. Philza had braced himself for anger, for the blind mournful rage that came with grief.

But... Tommy had been quiet. Angry, perhaps a bit, but still quiet.

And just like that, Tommy had walked away.

He wanted nothing to do with Phil...

Because Phil had left him and killed the only person Tommy cared about.

Gods damn it all.

"Phil?" 

Philza reared back, turning around to see a tired Ranboo peering down from the ladder.

"Ranboo?" he breathed.

Ranboo must've seen his expression because his face switched from tired and confused to shocked.

"I'm sorry," Ranboo murmured as he scrambled back, his head disappearing from sight.

Phil let out a long sigh and took a moment to compose himself. He picked up the discarded diamond sword, its edge far too sharpened - it was likely beyond any repair... but Phil had already sworn to not use that sword to so much as scratch another living thing. With all the care he could manage, he wrapped the sword back up in the scraps of cloth, tying them gently before slipping the sword back into the chest that closed silently. Phil hesitated before walking away from the chest, his hand lingering too long above the wood.

That was enough feeling sorry for himself. Fuck all that.

He quickly pulled away from the chest and fixed his hat, settling it down lower on his head before looking out the window where he could just barely make out the lightening purples of dawn.

Today... Today he would go see Tommy.

Because he still had a job to do, dammit. He still had a boy to protect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SBI angst go brrrrr  
> Take THAT Wilbur - I put your stupid Samsung fridge mother into fanfiction and it WORKS!! HAHAHA


	4. Confrontation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Philza has to save a traumatized child and Dream is not happy.  
> Miniscule glimpse at Dream lore?  
> Perhaps.

Of all the things Tommy expected to happen today, Philza striding through the portal with a grin on his face was far, _far_ down that list.

"Phil?" he breathed taking in the man's visage.

"Phil?" Dream's voice was a bit sharper and made Tommy flinch. That wasn't a happy tone.

Philza hadn't ever been intimidating or tall, except maybe when his wings were unfurled - then the guy looked terrifying (then again, Tommy hadn't seen Phil's wings in a while. Were they still there? tucked under a shirt? Is that how that shit worked? To hell if Tommy knew). Philza was actually relatively short, at least compared to Tommy, with bright golden hair and a collection of blonde fuzz on his chin. His eyes were bright, like the sky that he had so long flown in, and there were times when they lit up with his smile. But... he wasn't intimidating or fearsome. Sure, he looked like someone you'd want to be friends with but he was a big step down from the "Angel of Death" Tommy had been told about all his life. Even at the moment, with Philza decked out in dark armor and a cloak of blue, Tommy found it hard to imagine the man as anything more than a soft old man who had nothing better to do than to go fishing.

So, why was Dream tensing like he saw something dangerous?

"Hey, Tommy!" Phil greeted warmly, his entire face lighting up as he waved at the boy. As the man approached Tommy took a wary step back until he was pressed up against Dream's side. The presence was familiar and Tommy felt some of the fear drain from his mind.

Dream was here this time. He couldn't get mad at Tommy, he had this under control. Tommy reached up and touched the porcelain mask that hung to the side of his face, taking a breath as the familiar cold surface brushed against his fingertips.

__

_"It's a gift, Tommy. You know to - to show our friendship."_

Dream was his friend. Dream was here. It was going to be okay.

"What are you doing here, Philza?" Dream demanded, his voice level and control - but Tommy knew that tone. Dream wasn't happy. Tommy shifted on his feet and bit his lip trying to tell himself that he was okay - Dream wasn't mad with _him_.

It was fine. Dream was here.

Philza didn't seem to notice Dream's tone because he didn't stop coming closer. Tommy braced himself, not sure why or what he was bracing for, but just in case something happened. When Philza slowly reached out and suddenly grabbed his shoulders he couldn't help but flinch.

"How you doin' mate?" Philza asked. He seemed too happy it seemed... and he was ignoring Dream. Why was he ignoring Dream? Didn't he know that made Dream upset?

"Phil - " Dream was definitely cross.

"Just thought I'd drop by a while. I've missed seeing you Tommy," Phil smiled, giving Tommy a gentle pat on the shoulder before swinging a hefty backpack onto the ground.

Tommy took a moment to register that. 

"You - you missed me?" Tommy echoed.

"Of course, bud," Philza concurred as he rustled around in his bag. "Hmm, ah - here we go."

He pulled out a small emerald earring from the bottom of the bag, a soft smile on his face.

"What's that?" Tommy asked, curiosity pulling him away from Dream's side.

"It's a present I've been working on for a while. I got a few emeralds and spent some time crafting them into... well, this."

Phil gently handed Tommy the emerald, smiling encouragingly.

"Is this... is this a pity gift?" Tommy asked, just to clear the air. He couldn't help but think that it was... even if it wasn't exactly useful. Usually, the pity gifts he got were utilitarian, some tools or armor that felt heavy in his hands or on his back. The earring was practically useless.

"What?" Philza asked. "No, mate. It's just a gift. I gave one to Ghostbur too. See, we match."

Philza proudly lifted a strand of blond hair to show the shimmering emerald stud that pierced his left ear. Tommy relaxed a bit, his hand closing around the earring and a small smile coming to his lips.

"Thanks, Phil," Tommy murmured trying to squash that small something in his chest that was growing warm. He looked back to Dream for affirmation and found the green-clad man unmoved, his hands hidden in the pockets of his robe.

"Here, let's put it on," Phil smiled as he gently took the earring from Tommy's hands and strung through Tommy's piercing. It was funny, Tommy couldn't remember the last time he had worn jewelry - Wilbur had been the one to pierce his ears and that had been a while ago. He was half surprised that Phil didn't have to re-pierce them. 

"How do I look?" Tommy asked hopefully. "I don't look stupid right?"

"Nah, mate, though you do look a bit... underdressed. Where's your armor?" Philza asked as he took in Tommy's unarmored self.

Tommy shifted on his feet uncertainly looking down at his shoeless sock and the one tattered sneaker that was still just barely intact.

"He doesn't need armor," Dream's voice was salvation from the awkwardness. Tommy smiled as the masked man stepped up next to him.

Philza looked a bit confused as he straightened up and put the backpack on.

"Tommy, we all need protection - " Phil began.

"He has me," Dream interrupted simply, placing a hand on Tommy's shoulder. 

Philza narrowed his eyes but nodded slowly.

"It's true, Philza... I'm fine!" Tommy offered. "Dream is really great. He fucks up all the mobs and is cool and all - "

"Right, but now you got this old guy to watch out for, best to be equipped" Philza chuckled, scanning the terrain. "You've got a mine somewhere around here, right?"

"Uh - yeah, it's over there," Tommy pointed to the small crevasse in the earth that was just barely visible through the swaying grasses that danced around Tommy's campsite.

"Awesome, let's go get you some iron at least," Philza urged. 

"B-but there's really no use in it Philza, I - I mean - " Tommy paused momentarily as he glanced back at Dream. The man hadn't made any signal that he was upset with Tommy, or that he disapproved.

"You coming?" Philza asked as he pulled out a pickaxe that had been strapped to his back.

Tommy carefully looked away from Dream and shrugged. "Sure... I-I guess, why not?"

So he followed Phil into the cave system, looking back now and again to ensure that Dream was still there, that he was still following, that he hadn't left.

They traversed deep into the cave as most of it had been picked clean by Tommy and Dream.

 _And then blown up by Dream_ , a small voice whispered, making Tommy hold his head to try and quiet it.

"You okay, Toms?" Philza asked as he looked up from the iron vein he had been mining, small rocks in hand that were flecked with iron bits.

"Yeah - yeah, I just... he's my friend," Tommy whispered.

"What?" 

"You feeling okay, Tommy?" Dream asked, seemingly appearing behind Tommy.

"What? Yeah! Of course big man!" Tommy forced a laugh and clenched the wooden handle of his stone pickaxe. 

Dream hummed and turned to scan the cave for any monsters.

They mined for a few hours in the stuffy air of the underground. Philza constructed a few furnaces to quickly smelt the iron ore they had collected. He was rather impressive with the speed with which he was able to forge a makeshift set of iron armor with no real equipment. The end result was rough around the edges and the craftsmanship wasn't anything compared to his own netherite armor, but it was sturdy.

"I ain't much, but this'll help!" Philza smiled as he handed it to Tommy who strapped it on slowly, his eyes darting over to Dream over and over again to ensure that it was okay. That this was okay. That he wasn't doing anything wrong.

Dream stood to the side and said nothing, keeping his arms tucked in the folds of his green cloak. 

"Well, look at that!" Philza praised as he took in Tommy's garb. "Now you look a little sturdier."

Tommy took a moment to study the heavy armor, it had been a while since he'd have a full set. It was nice to have the shell of metal protecting him again.

 _You won't have it for long_ , the voice whispered.

He winced and glanced at Dream who still hadn't moved. Was he mad? It was impossible to tell with the mask.

"Still, maybe we should get some meat on those bones," Philza chuckled, gently patting Tommy's armored shoulders. "You look starved."

Hungry? Tommy hadn't really noticed. It seemed like he was always hungry - and it had been nice to have the familiar pain, distracting even.

 _You're starving. He's been starving you_ , the voice hissed.

No - NO. Dream hadn't been starving him. Dream had hunted for him when it had gotten unbearable, he had been the only reliable source of food thus far. It wasn't Dream's fault that his farms failed - it wasn't. He just... he was just bad at taking care of himself.

Tommy felt half-present as he followed Philza out of the mine. He winced as the dusk sunlight met his eye but a few blinks later he found himself standing beside Philza as the man seemed to relish the crimson sunset.

Tommy looked towards the setting sun for a moment before looking away. It wasn't anything impressive - just a stupid red sunset.

"How about we go fishing for a bit, see what we catch for dinner?" Philza encouraged.

Tommy shrugged, still not completely comfortable in the heavy armor he now adorned. It was big, bulky, and heavy - such a weird transition from the free movement he'd grown used to in these months spent in exile. He felt... like a turtle, slow but surprisingly safe.

"I don't have a fishing pole," he muttered, kicking a pebble at his feet. Philza looked at Tommy for a moment, seemingly judging for a moment before smiling.

"Ah, don't worry, I brought a spare," he dismissed.

"Did you bring one for Dream?" Tommy asked. It would be... bad if they left him out. Just as a precaution, Tommy looked back to where Dream was emerging from the mine.

"Don't worry about me, Tommy," Dream dismissed. He sounded upset... short in words and bothered. Tommy shifted on his feet nervously. Had he done something wrong? Should he ask? He should ask.

"Great! Come on then!" Philza laughed heartily as he clapped Tommy on the back and led him down to the beach giving him no time to voice his concerns. Tommy could only frantically look back at Dream to make sure he wasn't leaving. The hunter didn't so much as shift from the opening of the cave, his porcelain mask steady as he watched the two leave him. Tommy swallowed a lump in his throat as Philza brought him to the warm sands that stuck to his socked foot and got caught between his toes. Calmly placing the large backpack on the ground, Philza pulled out two small fishing poles with a plethora of line attached. They weren't his good fishing poles - Tommy didn't know much about Philza but he had seen his elaborately carved fishing poles and these were many steps down from those. They were really just sturdy twigs with line and hook attached.

"I put these together last minute," Philza explained, seeming to read Tommy's mind. "Don't worry, they'll still catch fish."

Tommy smiled and scoffed as Philza laughed at the sad-looking poles. 

"They look like shit," Tommy snickered. 

"Yup," Philza nodded. "Haven't gotten a chance to carve out a good old God-Rod but we'll get there." He reached out to Tommy, sad little pole in hand as he offered it to the boy. 

Tommy looked at the pole for a moment before a smile broke on his face and he snatched up the pole that Phil offered him.

"Thanks."

~~~

The day had gone by somewhat without a hitch, in Phil's opinion. He'd gotten Tommy into something more protective and had gotten a good meal of cooked cod in the boy. Now he sat beside Tommy as a campfire crackled and the boy's eyes grew heavy. Philza stayed quiet as the boy fought with his consciousness to stay awake. The boy needed rest. It seemed like the boy was going to fall asleep on his feet earlier.

It... hurt... hurt to see him so battered. Tommy was exhausted, with heavy bags under his faded eyes. His sparkling energy was fizzed into something meager and almost unseeable. He flinched at loud noises and sudden movements. He hesitated before agreeing to anything, there was no confidence to fuel his decisions. He was almost defeated.

Almost.

Philza saw the glimmer of the boy he knew every now and again. Tommy's smile when he caught a huge fish. The obnoxious celebratory cheers that seemed to bubble out of Tommy's throat uncontrollably. The snarkiness with which Tommy refuted a bit of Philza's playful banter.

Tommy was still somewhere in this broken little husk of a boy. Philza had found him it would take an army to pry his boy from what would have to be his cold dead hands.

As they watched the campfire dance in the night wind, their bellies full and their hands tired from a day of mining, Philza couldn't help but feel a bit reminiscent. How many times had he been here with Wilbur? With Techno?

Something cracked a twig near the campsite putting Philza on edge as he turned to see - 

Dream.

Ah yes, the only downside of this entire day. The bastard in the flesh.

The man was like a shadow; silent and always right there, watching and (Philza suspected) brooding. He didn't like how Tommy always looked to Dream for permission (Tommy never asked permission!) or how he looked for praise from the masked man (Tommy never gave a damn what anyone thought!!). 

He didn't like what he saw in Tommy, and he suspected (he knew) it was Dream's fault. Ranboo had told him that much. Philza's eyes drifted momentarily to the white mask that Tommy wore on the side of his face. There were two dots for eyes but no mouth or expression, it was still a blank slate and that was somewhat unnerving. Philza couldn't yet explain why, but the fact that Tommy now had a mask made his stomach churn and twist like a fish out of water.

Dream had done something, he was planning something.

Presently, the hunter strode quietly into the firelight colored by the blood of his newest kill. Based on the acrid smell of gunpowder, Phil suspected it had been a creeper.

"Out patrolling?" Philza asked pleasantly. Kill them with kindness. Smother them with softness. Fucking flatten them with flattery. Or... stab them as many times as possible (Phil liked that last option with every passing moment).

Dream sat down on the other side of the fire, pulling out his shimmering black ax that was caked in blood. He pulled a dark cloth out of his cloak and carefully began to wipe the grime off his blade, treating it with a tender hand that Phil hadn't thought the masked man was capable of.

"Something like that," Dream responded cooly.

Tommy shifted and when Philza turned to ask what was wrong, he found the boy asleep and leaning on his shoulders. Philza smiled and carefully pulled the bowl of fish remains and bones from Tommy's limp hands before throwing the remains into the fire and stowing the bowl to his side.

They sat in silence for a while longer. Dream seemed to stare into the crackling fire while Philza finally allowed himself to drop his pleasant mask of happiness and glare at Dream from across the crackling blaze. He knew his glare was cold, something icy and rageful and he could only hope that the cold in his gaze was able to convey the absolute _loathing_ he was feeling.

Finally, Dream put his ax aside and leaned back, his mask cooly rising to meet Phil's cold gaze.

"Let's drop the act then, shall we?" Dream asked simply.

"Sure," Philza growled.

"Why are you here?" Dream poised the question casually but had Phil still had wings, they would've ruffled in anger.

"To see Tommy," he responded, careful to keep his voice low and quiet so as not to stir the boy on his shoulder. Tommy didn't need to deal with this. He needed his sleep.

Dream hummed as his mask tilted a bit giving him the appearance of looking towards Tommy. Philza was struck by the urge to protect Tommy and get him as far away from Dream as possible.

"He is a special boy, isn't he?" Dream asked, somewhat distantly.

Philza bristled and bit back a sneer.

"But that's expected from someone like him, I suppose. A child from the stars. Peculiar, right?" Dream taunted.

Phil felt his world freeze.

_"Take care of him, he's your Tommy now," it was a whisper in the wind. It sounded like a woman but it was near impossible to tell as it also sounded like a gentle collection of bells. It wasn't a human voice... and it sounded as if it drifted off into the sparkling star-lit sky._

_Philza looked around fruitlessly for the holder of that voice, his eyes always darting back o the collection of blankets that held the babe. The literal child left in the middle of nowhere - abandoned and alone._

Philza felt his throat threaten to close as he clenched his jaw. He instinctively held Tommy closer. How did Dream... How did he know? 

_The baby seemed human enough... the cloth he was wrapped in on the other hand was inexplicably soft and strange. It seemed to move on its own accord as Phil knelt down and picked the wailing child up off the forest floor._

"You look a little shocked," Dream taunted casually. "What? It's no secret your... wards? kids? apprentices, is that what they are? Anyway, it's no secret that the kids you take in are anything but normal."

"How do you know about Tommy?" Philza demanded in a low voice.

_"Shhhh," Philza soothed as he gently began to bounce on the balls of his feet. The baby didn't cease his (Phil thought it was a boy) insistent wailing. "Hey, hey mate, it's okay! You can stop crying now."_

_His wings flapped a bit as he tried to take in the strangeness of the situation. The baby suddenly grew silent, widened his large and teary eyes as he took in the sight of those grand grey wings. A small smile lit up his toothless grin in a small babble that seemed to make Phil's heart melt._

_A strange wave of protectiveness slammed into Philza like a tidal wave. It was supernatural, strangely overpowering but Philza didn't have the heart to fight it as the babe babbled away. Who would leave a kid out here alone? Who could have the heart to abandon him like this?_

"I know things," Dream dismissed with a wave of his hand. "But I have a more pressing question for you, Philza."

Philza couldn't help but sneer. "What?"

"Why suddenly care?"

Philza swallowed a lump of rage. "I've always cared."

"Sure, that's why you've been around so often after he was exiled," Dream nodded. "Absolutely."

"Don't - don't you fucking patronize me."

"I'm just saying, he - I mean it's not like he actually wants you anyway. Philza, you killed Wilbur. He hates you for that."

Phil clenched his jaw. 

Don't listen. Dream tries to manipulate - tries to control. Don't let him control the situation. Phil knew that - but it still got his blood boiling.

"He talks about it sometimes," Dream continued simply, lounging on the sand. "You know - on the bad days. Sure, he knows Wilbur was a dick by the end. He had lost it and was - well I'm sure you remember what Wilbur was like... but you? Ha, you may as well have dropped Tommy off on the side of a street as far as he's concerned. You abandoned him, it's sad really; watching him right here, forced to bond with you because he's so desperate for attention. Forced to swallow his hatred for you."

"He doesn't hate me," Philza knew the words sounded weak but he didn't fumble with his words. He had to believe that. He had to believe Dream was lying.

Dream scoffed but shrugged.

"Whatever you say," he supposed. "But it's cute, what you're trying to do now."

"And what am I trying to do now?" Philza asked dangerously.

"I mean, I think you're trying to make yourself feel better."

Phil felt a flood of anger fill his body and he forced himself to hold his tongue.

"Here you are, you know, you're all guilt-ridden over killing your son that you just shut down and forgot about everyone else, including your other son who hates your guts. And now, here you are, desperate to make yourself feel better and so, where do you go? To the child that you abandoned. I mean - you've abandoned him for so long, he hardly knows who you are." That was a taunt. Dream was taunting him.

Philza could feel familiar anger burn through every vein in his body as his fingers longed to wring Dream's neck.

"You don't get to control Tommy, and you don't get to taunt me," Philza growled.

"Control? I'm hurt. Tommy's free to do as he wishes," Dream dismissed.

"Like wear armor?" Philza snapped. "Or eat?"

"I'm the only one who's watched out for him this long. How about you Philza? Can you say that?" With that, Dream got to his feet and sauntered over to the group. Philza kept a strong grip on Tommy, his glare focused on Dream.

Philza's fingers tingled with the promise of power, the godly gifts that he'd been granted desiring release. Gods, he wanted to release that potential. He wanted to turn Dream into a little green stain in the dirt and burn anything that remained.

"I mean, take a look at yourself Philza," Dream continued. "You're siren son's blood is on your hands. Your blood-thirsty apprentice is off in retirement, off in gods know where - though I'm sure you do - and where does that leave little Tommy? I mean, you've got to realize I'm only doing what's best for - "

He had been reaching for Tommy's hair with those calloused hands wrapped in their fingerless gloves. Philza's own hand moved like lightning as they grabbed Dream's wrist, freezing his fingers inches away from Tommy's sunlight curls. He would _not_ touch Tommy!

There was a crackle of energy as Philza found himself yearning to learn why Dream was doing this. He traded two of his lives for power, goddammit ,and he wanted to know why this bastard wanted his boy. His son.

For a split second, his power raced up the masked godling's arm right into his heart and Philza found himself in someone else's head with someone's memories.

_Rainy nights. Muddy streets. Tears falling down a young boy's face as he's left alone with his ankles hidden in the mud and tears running down his face. Always alone. His screams and sobs went unheard in the downpour._

_A teen with shaking hands and trembling breaths was desperately pressing a mask on his face to hide his tears. Hide his pain. Hide the emotion. Hide._

_A town reduced to embers with a masked figure sobbing at an execution stand in the remnants of the square, screaming the name of a child that went unheard._

_A man laden with anger and sadness unable to stop people from leaving. Unable to stop being alone. Two people walked away and he knew they wouldn't come back. No one came back._

A wooden chest, locked tight and chained up. The feeling of emptiness. No emotion - no pain. The mask was lighter now... it hurt less. All that hurt belonged in the wooden chest... not his own.

Philza blinked for a moment while Dream viciously pulled away, his ax suddenly appearing in hand as the masked man took a moment to collect himself.

Philza calmly put his arm back around Tommy as a smile came to his face.

"Ah, it makes a bit more sense now," Philza supposed.

Dream flexed the hand that had just been witness to Philza's terrifying interface abilities.

"What did you do?" he demanded, his voice stills soft but holding a very clear edge to it.

"I always wondered what you sacrificed for power." It was Philza's turn to have the upper hand now and _wow_ , it felt good to see the masked man taken by surprise. Now... it was his turn to take the aggressive position in this conversation.

"People like us sacrifice a lot to stay alive... to survive as long as we have," Philza murmured, his eyes meeting Dream's mask.

Dream's breathing slowed as the masked man collected himself.

"I haven't given up anything of importance, unlike you." Dream was attempting to get back in control of the conversation but it was too late, the power had shifted and Philza wasn't about to back down now.

"How much of your humanity did you lock away?" Philza chuckled darkly. "Is there anything left in you or... are you just, empty?"

Dream's fists clenched and the ax in his hand seemed to quiver.

"Ah, it's anger, isn't it? You've still got some of that locked away under all that mask. Probably what pushed everyone else away. It's hard to care for someone who's incapable of caring for anyone else - no wonder you've been alone so long," Philza's fear had vanished as he stared the godling down.

He'd struck a nerve.

Dream's breaths had suddenly become short and his knuckles had turned white as he clutched the ax.

"You don't know what you're talking about," Dream hissed.

Philza hummed and looked back into the campfire, feeling rather smug. "Is that why you need Tommy around? To fill some of that void? Well, I suggest you look somewhere else for comfort, you lonely sadistic fuck."

For a moment, Philza thought Dream was going to attack. The man's tense stature trembled with uncontrolled emotion but instead of lashing out with that black ax, the masked man flexed his hand and allowed it to slip back into its little space pocket leaving the green-clad man empty-handed. For a moment, the two small dots on that bleached mask seemed to glimmer a brilliant green in the moonlight before reverting back to their dark dots. 

Dream snapped his fingers angrily and the change was immediate.

Something magical fluctuated in the space around them and Tommy contorted in a whimper.

"What did you do?" Philza demanded as Tommy began to whimper and shake in his arms. Those whimpers quickly grew in volume and consonance until Tommy was begging for Dream.

"What did you DO!?" Philza had to keep himself from ripping the bastard's throat out.

"He's having a nightmare, Philza, be a little more compassionate," Dream tutted, his shoulders relaxing as he seemed to reclaim his self-control.

Tommy seemed to fly out of Philza's arms as he awoke, a mess of tears and blubbering. He muttered and sobbed for a moment, deaf to Philza's consoling as he pleaded and begged for something; Dream. He was begging for Dream.

"Tommy? Tommy, you're okay. I'm here. Calm down." Philza's words were lost on the boy. It was like Phil didn't exist.

"Tommy?" Dream's honeyed voice soothed the boy's sobs and shakily Tommy looked over to where the masked man was crouching beside him.

Philza could've committed murder right there and then. He could've summoned his black sword and plunged it so deep into Dream's chest that it burst every organ, ripped that blade out so viciously that the masked man's cloak would turn a terrifying crimson. He wanted to... he wanted to... 

"Dream?" Tommy's weak voice was so broken it shattered Philza's heart.

"I'm here, Tommy," Dream's sweet voice made Philza's blood churn like a stormy sea. "I'm right here."

Tommy threw himself into Dream's arms, sobbing something about 'leaving' and 'coming back' as he buried his face in Dream's green cloak.

"Shhh," Dream soothed, his hands going to gently stroke Tommy's hair. "I'm not going anywhere. I'm right here. I won't leave."

Dream's mask slowly looked away from the boy in his arms and stared expressionlessly at Philza who, not for the first time, wondered how much force he would have to hit the bastard with to shatter both the mask and the smug smile he was certain lay beneath it.

~~~

Well... Tommy hadn't woke up drowning so - that was good.

Tommy had, however, awoken in Dream's arms which was somewhat confusing because he was fairly certain he had fallen asleep next to Phil. Another concerning thing was how his skin was crawling as Dream greeted him good morning.

Why was he nervous? It was Dream. Dream was his friend. He told himself that again and again as Dream got up to go patrol the perimeter. Dream was his friend. Dream was his friend.

 _No, he's not_ , that annoying little voice hissed. Tommy cursed and held his head, trying desperately to force that little voice into a corner of his mind where it would never be heard again.

"You okay, Toms?" Philza asked, putting his hand on Tommy's shoulder. Tommy hated the fact that he flinched. Philza wasn't going to hurt him, no one was going to hurt him - he hadn't done anything wrong yet.

"Yeah, yeah big man, I'm alright," Tommy assured the man as he looked to the pan where Philza was frying a pan of eggs and the remains of a chicken for breakfast. It smelled heavenly.

He hadn't eaten this much in a while. But... he hadn't been too hungry either.

As Phil gave him a bowl of food, he noticed that Phil hadn't set a place for Dream who was hanging out by the forest line searching for any monsters that were taking shelter under the shade... He only did that when he was angry...

Had Tommy made him angry?

He would be angrier if he found out Phil hadn't set a place for him. Phil would get in trouble. Then Phil would leave...

Quickly, Tommy reached for another bowl from beside the fire when Philza's gentle hands stopped him.

"You want another bowl, Tommy?" Philza questioned.

"Dream..." Tommy muttered. "Dream needs a place."

Something dark seemed to fill Phi's eye for a moment which terrified Tommy. Had he done something wrong? Was he in trouble?

Then, Philza was back to smiling and warmly laughing.

"No, no Toms, don't worry about it. Dream said he was good. He's not hungry," Philza dismissed.

"Are you sure, I don't think Dream would like - " Tommy began again.

"Ah, who gives a fuck? If he wants food he can come over here and ask for some like a grown man," Philza chuckled, there was a bite in that tone that took Tommy by surprise.

Tommy felt like he'd been slapped. How... how could Philza be so... stupid?

 _Brave_ , another voice corrected. Tommy winced and held his head. No. No, Phil was being _stupid_

"You sure you're okay? Do you have a headache?" Philza asked, his voice full of worry.

"I'm fine, I'm fine!" Tommy snapped. He saw Philza recoil and almost immediately Tommy began to internally curse himself.

He just pushed people away. His stupid tongue and attitude pushed everyone away just like Dream said - 

"Well... if you feel alright. Would you mind talking for a minute? I've been meaning to talk to you about something," Philza's ponderings pulled Tommy away. He looked to Philza who was staring into the campfire carefully. Tommy took the chance to fill his face with the eggs (gods they tasted amazing, why didn't he eat like this more often?).

"What?" he asked with cheeks full of heavenly-tasting breakfast, like, holy shit, what had Phil put in these?

"Well... I've been wanting to go adventuring for a while," Philza began.

Tommy felt his heart plunge into his gut. Philza was going adventuring. He was leaving him behind to go chase down stupid dreams and stupid - 

"Would you like to come with me?" Philza asked hopefully.

...

what?

What??

_What!?_

He must've had the dumbest expression on his face because Philza threw his head back and laughed.

"Is it that surprising?" the man asked sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck as his hat dipped to hide his eyes.

"Y-you want me to go... with you? Adventuring?" Tommy echoed, still unsure he'd heard that correctly.

"I... I'd really like it," Philza murmured, looking up as he gazed into Tommy's eyes. He looked... genuine... hopeful even.

"But... I'm exiled - I can't - " Tommy began.

"From the SMP," Phil dismissed with a happy wave of the hand. "We'd go beyond that!"

Phil gestured to the horizon, his eyes sparkling with something otherworldly as he took in the sights.

"All of that, Tommy," Phil smiled. "There's an endless expanse to explore. So much to do, so much to see. All of it - untouched and untamed."

"We'd... go together?" Tommy murmured.

"If you'd allow me to go with you," Philza smiled. "We could go wherever we want, do whatever we want."

"Could we... build a tower?" Tommy asked.

"The biggest, ugliest cobblestone tower you can muster," Philza smirked. "As many as you want, all over the world if you want to."

Tommy felt like his heart was soaring. When was the last time he felt so warm?

"We can stay in the wilderness as long as you want... until this stupid exile is up and you can return to L'Manburg unless you don't want to. We can do anything Tommy, but it's up to you. I'll only go if you do."

"I..." Tommy laughed for a moment, running a hand through his hair as he allowed himself to consider the thought. It sounded...

It sounded great!

 _Dream wouldn't like you to go_ , a new voice chimed. _He'd be angry. We can't leave him behind! He's our friend!_

 _We would still be exiled! We wouldn't be doing anything wrong!_ the familiar voice argued.

Gods, they hurt his head. Tommy shook his head and closed his eyes.

"You don't have to make a decision now, just think about it," Philza soothed.

"I... I want to - " Tommy began.

"He'll stay," Dream's voice broke through the warm conversation like a cold knife.

Tommy looked over to where Dream seemed to have suddenly appeared on the other side of the fire pit, staring at Philza and Tommy.

"Wh - What?" Tommy hated how hollow his voice sounded as he shrunk away from Dream.

"I don't think that's your decision to make, Dream," Philza's voice was much sturdier than his own.

"Tommy will stay," Dream's order left no room for argument. Tommy didn't want to argue...

 _Yes, yes we fucking want to argue!_ the familiar voice screamed. It felt like the voice was banging on his skull. Tommy cringed and clenched his jaw hoping the voice would shut up.

Philza stood up slowly, facing Dream coldly as he continued to argue.

"We won't be breaking any rules. He's allowed to go if he wants to."

"I need to keep an eye on him," Dream stated. "Make sure he stays out of trouble. He has a terrible habit of causing problems."

Tommy flinched at the tone. Dream was right. He caused a lot of problems. People hated him for it. They - 

"He's a boy. He's - he should be allowed to make mistakes and I'll keep an eye on him to keep him safe," Philza was almost growling now.

"He's a liability," Dream dismissed. "He'll slow you down, he knows that."

Those words seemed to punch Tommy in the gut.

"Not everyone seeks to do things as fast and efficiently as possible," Philza snapped. "And he can't slow me down if he's the entire fucking _point_ of the journey."

"How sentimental. Pretty words, Philza, but they're pretty empty. Come on, Tommy," Dream beckoned as he walked away from the fire and towards the tent.

Tommy should follow. He knew he should follow. Dream would be mad if he - 

"Tommy," Philza's voice seemed... ethereal almost. Tommy slowly looked over to Philza and for a moment the man's expression struck him as... sad?

"Tommy, it's your choice," Philza soothed, something in his voice strained. Tommy noticed Phil's hands were clenched at his sides. "But... I'm not going anywhere without you, Phil's words struck something in Tommy's chest. 

"Tommy!" Dream snapped. Tommy flinched and bit down on his tongue.

 _Go, go! Get away from Dream! Philza is safe! Philza will protect us!_ the familiar little voice begged

"Tommy," Philza pleaded. "You don't have to listen to him."

"Come here, Tommy," Dream's voice was harsh... he was angry. Tommy started shaking as his mind threatened to tear itself apart.

A gentle hand was placed on his and Tommy looked up to see Philza smiling.

"Let's get out of here, Tommy," Philza soothed, his eyes on Dream but his words for Tommy.

That... that sounded fucking wonderful.

He let Phil lead him to his feet and couldn't help but take a breath of relief as the man wrapped an arm around him. The contact was so nice... so safe. He instinctively grabbed a handful of Phil's long haori and held it.

"Philza," Dream's voice was closer... it was dangerous.

The arm around Tommy tightened and Tommy couldn't bring himself to look up. He didn't want to see the man that he knew was in front of them...

He wouldn't be strong enough to stay in one piece. He felt his knees shake and threaten to buckle while his mind screamed danger.

"Dream, please step aside," Philza's voice seemed low too... dangerous.

"I think it's time you leave, Philza."

That was what Tommy was scared of. The fury in Dream's tongue. Fuck. Fuck this was bad. Shit. What was he thinking!? This was bad. Dream would - 

"Tommy," Philza soothed gently, his hand squeezing Tommy's arm assuringly. "I want you to follow this, okay?"

Phil gently pushed something into Tommy's hands. Tommy slowly looked down at the object in his shaking hands and found himself holding an enchanted compass with its red arrow jutting off diagonally.

"What?" Tommy managed out of his raspy throat.

"Just follow it, okay? It'll take you somewhere safe," Philza's voice was soft and warm as it rested on Tommy's shoulders.

"Wh- But what about you?" Tommy breathed. He still couldn't look at Dream but he saw the glint of an ax being raised to the dawning sun in his peripheral.

"Don't worry about me," Phil breathed.

With the speed only accomplished by someone inhuman, Philza brandished his netherite sword that seemed to flicker in the flames of the rising sun. The blonde held it up to separate him and Tommy from their opponent before Philza pushed Tommy behind him, his orders hardly registering in the boy's ears as the man raced to clash with Dream.

Tommy stood there frozen for a moment, watching as the sword slammed against the terrifying ax, sending sparks flying into the air as the heavy blades slipped off one another. Dream moved freakishly quick as he raised the ax again and stuck at Philza who dodged the blow gracefully, slashing out with his sword that glanced harmlessly off Dream's heavy armor.

"TOMMY! GO!" Philza ordered, pulling Tommy out of his trance.

The next thing he knew, he was running. Tearing through the forest like a frightened rabbit as he fled from the sound of clashing weapons.

He was so dead. Dream was going to kill him. Dream would be so mad. He was going to die. He was going to die!

 _Phil will keep us safe, keep running. Follow the compass_ , the familiar voice cried desperately. 

_Phil will not last against Dream... and he'll leave us too, just like before. Dream didn't leave us_ , the other voice hissed. 

Tommy forced himself to swallow the bile building up in his throat.

"TOMMY! DON'T FUCKING BETRAY ME, TOMMY!!" Dream's roar filled the sky almost making Tommy's knees buckle from under him.

 _RUN!_ the same voice urged. It was the only thing that kept him moving.

 _Dream will hate you. Everyone will hate you. You're making a mistake_ , a cold voice hissed in Tommy's mind. Tommy sobbed and pushed forward. His mind hurt, his chest ached, but his heart seemed to be screaming at him to run... and run he did.

Tommy looked at Phil's compass and changed course to follow the arrow. He tripped over tree roots and ducked under branches, wincing with every branch that scraped his face and every rock that stubbed his toe.

Still, he ran... he ran as fast as he could and he didn't dare look back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha, Dream angst go brrrr
> 
> "Wow! Tommy got away so fast," you say. "I thought he was gonna join Dream," you question  
> HA! You fools! This is only the beginning! We're just getting started!!!  
> I promised Tommy-Dream protégée and I'm gonna deliver Tommy-Dream protégée
> 
> I just gotta get through more angst.


	5. Unexpected Reunions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The chatter with everyone: BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD  
> The chatter with Tommy: *gently holds*
> 
> This chapter is dedicated to Edward the Enderman, may he rest in peace

__

_Late! Hi! Technolate! Late Sleepy Techno BLOOD FOR THE BLOD GOD Late! Late! Late! Late! huminahuminahuminahumina Late! Late! Late! Late! Late! Late! Late! Late! Late! Late! Late! Late! Technolate! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD e e eeeeeeeeeee Late! Tired boi. baby Sleepyhead! Only cowards sleep in Late! good morning! huminahuminahuminahumina. e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e SLEEPY BOI!!! huminahuminahuminahumina Late! Late! e Technolate Late! e e e Technolate!! Late! LATE LATE LATE! BLOOD morning! hullo huminahuminahuminahumina_

Techno groaned as the familiar cacophony of voices chirped their useless calls to try and stir him. He adjusted his position in bed which only seemed to make the voices call louder. He'd told them he was awake and now they were screaming at him to be productive at some ungodly morning hour.

"It's too early for this, chat," Techno groaned as he forced his heavy eyes to open and found the sun only just emerging from the horizon.

His chatter accepted that with mixed results.

__

_TechnoLATE! Sleepy Techno Hiiii!! what are we doing today? Late!! LATE!! eeeeeeeee Baby boi BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! Hello! Hiiiiiiii Technolate! huminahuminahuminahumina TechnoSLEEP eeeeeeeee Technosleep LATE LATE LATE LATE! Hi Techno!! Ugg, it's so early e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e eeeeeee_

Techno moaned and buried his face in the soft comforter taking a moment to enjoy the warmth of his bed and the way the cool air brushed against his nose. 

Slowly he shifted out of bed as the voices yelled a little louder. They were lively this morning which meant getting a few minutes of peace wasn't really an option this crisp morning. The man yawned as he blinked the sleep out of his eyes that were still a bit foggy. His hooves clicked onto the wooden floor as he forced himself to stand and walk over to the ladder that he descended to meet a dying fire.

His local enderman was still hanging there like a ghastly apparition, his deep purple eyes staring absentmindedly into the embers. It had shown up one day and hadn't moved from the room since, its twistedly tall form hunched down as its unhinged jaw sat closed and harmless, its eyes absolutely enthralled by the fire. Techno was pretty certain there was something wrong with the monster but the chatter had grown attached to it, deeming its name to be "Edward" and to satisfy them, Techno didn't disturb the beast - even if he took up a large portion of his house and was a gigantic creature that had the capability of slaughter a handful of unarmored people. It was _fine_.

The chatter was fickle with what they grew attached to and if Techno dared to even consider the monster, he was sure they'd give him a splitting headache for weeks to come.

Edward made a sad little sound as he heard Techno come down and without meeting Techno's gaze (thank gods) pointed at the dying fire that had been reduced to warm oranges hidden in a pile of soot.

That explained the chill air. Techno grabbed another log and threw it on the fire while the voices mocked his forgetfulness. Edward seemed pleased by this as he made a happy little sound in the back of his throat and settled back down to watch the growing fire. The chatter, on the other hand, were far less pleased and cheered their jeers as loud as possible.

"Right, how dare I misjudge how much wood would get us through the night. My bad. How dare I forget to wake up at the god-forsaken hours of midnight to put another log on. My bad. My bad," Techno mocked right back at them enjoying the way they rebelled against such jeering.

The voices didn't quite like being mocked so they descended into a cacophony but Techno made out a few giggles at his snarkiness which was good enough for him. Someone was entertained. To quiet the voices, he reached for his familiar weathered journal. The change was immediate as thousands of voices quieted and seemed to lean into the action as they eagerly waited to hear the plans for the day.

They loved to-do lists.

"Okay, chatter, let's see what yesterday's Techno needed us to do today," Techno yawned as he flipped through the worn leather-bound book. As his hand turned the crisp pages his free hand grabbed a golden carrot from a nearby chest for breakfast and began crunching down on the tart vegetable. The metal bent under his sharp tusks that were not much more than abnormal bumps in his bottom row of teeth. It was nice, to know his bloodlust wasn't acting up... even if the voices were.

At the moment they were cheering about the morning chores... along with a few other random things:

__

_Technobusy?? TURTLES!!! TURTLES!!! Beeezzzz!! Tubbo is gone? CRABRAVE!! Turtles!! Phil?? TECHNOHELP! Phil!! Dream! TOMMY! TECHNO HELP! Turtles. e e e eeeeeee BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD Phil - help Phil! Dreamis baddddd Turtles.Baby turtles bee b e e e e e e e eeeeeeeeeeeeee_

Techno winced as the voices barraged his ears but chose to ignore their typical random shouting. It was all nonsense usually. He finally reached the page was searching for and took the moment to sit down in a nearby chair, lounging calmly on the wooden piece of furniture.

"One:" he began, "check on the turtles."

About a third of his brain winced as thousands of voices cheered. They were way too eager to do these menial tasks...

"Two: check on the bees and collect some honey."

More cheers and a few outliers who seemed to be talking randomly.

"Three: check the woods for an arctic fox, ya know, just to see if - "

__

_e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e_

Techno lowered the book and held his head.

These jerks - 

__

_e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e_

Gods he could hardly think straight.

__

_e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e_

"Okay! Okay, Chat! Knock it off!" he pleaded as his head started to pound with the constant droning of vowels. They were bored, they must be bored - they only ever did this when they were - 

__

_e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e_

"And then maybe we'll check in with Phil!?" Techno yelled the last part to try and break the droning that seemed to fill the entirety of his house.

The droning stopped as the chatter took that information, leaving Techno's ears ringing with vowels and his mind echoing with the memory before the voices exploded with jubilee and eagerness. 

__

_Phil! PHIL! DADZA! Philllllllll!! PHILPHILPHIL Philza, the hardcore guy: PHIL PHIL PHIL PHIL Turtles!! PhilZAAAAA!!! Check on Philza!!! Tommy! Bees. PHIIIILLL TechnoSOFT BLOOD Phil! Yes. Phil! Go talk to dad Bees! Tubboisgone? Tommy!!! Dream! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! Technocute_

Techno sighed in relief as the pressure in his head seemed to release. The chatter loved Phil, they always had and he seemed to be the only thing some days that could quell their volume. Techno quickly got to work, finding it easier to push the voices into the back of his head as he busied his hands and set his mind elsewhere.

It was nice on days like this when the chores were numerous and he could keep himself busy; busy kept the voices quiet.

He threw on his warm clothes and strode out into the tundra, taking in the beautiful sight before him. The sun glinted on the newly fallen snow making it glisten like stars sewn into a white blanket. The forest that lay a few meters out of his front door marked the tree line of the artic and so the forerunners of those spruce trees were scraggly little things that sagged under the weight of the snow. The sky was a brilliant blue and the air had a sharp bite to it. It was a nice morning...

__

_Pretty Technosoft! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD Nice day Tommy needs HELP! DREAM!_

Techno dismissed the voices and instead focused on the crunching of his boots as they sunk through half a foot of snow. It hadn't been a terrible storm last night, so Techno doubted the turtles had suffered much in their man-made biozone. He trudged his way over to the little pond he had built and found himself looking into a pen full of happy turtles, all living their best little turtle lives. It brought a small smile to Techno's scarred face.

Techno opened the gate and stepped into the beach zone, the heat washing over him like a downpour immediately making his skin tingle uncomfortably as it sat restricted under so many layers. He paced the sands, being mindful of any piles of sand that hid the precious clutches of eggs. He made a mental headcount of how many clutches had been laid during the night and began wondering if he should expand when something grabbed his leg.

__

_DANGER! Attack!? BAD! FIGHT! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GODBLOODFORTHEBLOODGODBLOODFORTHEBLOODGOD_

The voices exploded as did his instincts, he drew a sword. The shriek of the metal scraping on his sheath matched the pounding shrieks in his head as he whirled around to face whatever it was that dare - 

It was a turtle. A large, fat, happy-looking turtle that helplessly scooted forward and tried to nip at Techno's boot laces once more. 

Techno took a shaky breath and relaxed his hand letting his dark sword fall downward, its tip brushing against the light sands. He was fine. He was safe...

He was retired here, safe, he shouldn't have been so easily startled. His heartbeat died down as he resheathed his sword and smiled gently at the gentle beast trying to chew on his shoelaces.

The chatter, however, had grown in volume.

__

_HAHAHAHA! Technodumb Technoscared!!! BLOOD Technoblade beaten by turtle? cute BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! baby turtle Blood for the blood god! precious turtle Hahaha TechnoSCARED!! Scary turtle! close call. BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!! awwwwwwwwwww_

Techno huffed as he fiddled with the clasp that held his cloak together. The turtles were safe, nothing bad had happened and if he was graced with mercy today, the chatter would forget all about him nearly murdering a turtle in fear - NO, No he hadn't been scared. He was Technoblade, he had no fear.

"You didn't see that," he denied as he made his way back to the fence. "None of you saw that."

__

_HA! Techno-loser. scaredtechno? e e e e e e e blood? TOMMY!!! nerd PHILL!!! Kill!!_

"No, you're all mistaken. None of you saw anything. You're all fools, absolute fools. Let's go check on the bees," Techno quickly exited the turtle enclosure trying to ignore the mockery that was taking place within his own mind.

He had made it back to the back of his house when the voices suddenly exploded in volume for no reason. Their cacophony was unreadable as they all screamed thousands of things at once. Techno stumbled and held his head as he struggled to make out anything. They were relentless - they hadn't been this loud since...

Since he'd been in danger as he fought in that crater of what was once L'Manburg. Since he'd been surrounded by chaos and blood and they'd been so happy to feast on that blood and they wanted more _and more and kill them all to get the blood for the blood god!!_

Techno bit back a curse and shook his head, his large ears flapping at his side helping to ground him. He wasn't fighting. There was no blood, no reason to want blood, no danger...

Right?

He glanced around nervously, wondering if there was an attack the chatter was trying to warn him about, yet the coast was clear. Nothing but the white snow and the bright sky for miles in any direction. There were no shadowed figures on the mountain peaks or in the trees. No foreign footprints in the new-fallen snow. Nothing out of place.

The chatter knew things. They always had and if they thought Techno needed to know, then they told him - or screamed it at the top of their lungs. They were uncontrollable now but also unreadable, only giving Techno a headache instead of any useful information!

"Chat," he warned in a low tone.

They continued their frantic screaming, clawing at his brain and piercing his consciousness in desperation, rage, and the desire for blood. Techno winced as the cries grew louder, they were panicking now, voices shrill and energetic.

"Chat I can't understand - " he pleaded.

A few of the voices died down so others could come to the front. It was still pure chaos in his head.

__

_PHIL!Tommy!DREAMYOUMONSTER!BLOODFORTHEBLOODGOD!!KILL!!ProtectTOMMY!HELP!!!!SAVEPHIL!BLOODFORTHEBLOODGOD!STOPDREAM!DREAM!TOMMY!PHILZA!BLOOD!KILL!STOP!NO!HELPTHEMSTOPIT!KILL!PROTECT!TECHNOBLADE!PHIL!TOMMY!FIGHT!DANGER!COMING!!!_

"Chat!" he hissed.

It was pointless, he could pick out names and frantic instructions but he couldn't do anything with that.

"Tommy's exiled guys," he tried to reason. He had to slow his breathing - his vision was turning a familiar red and his fingers were longing to wrap around his worn sword-handle once more. "Phil's in L'Manburg. Dream is... well actually I don't know where Dream is but - but guys I'm going to need you to take it down a bit, okay?"

__

_KILL!BLOODFORTHEBLOODGOD!VENGEANCE!PROTECT!PHIL!!STOPHIMHELPHIM!HEISCOMING!_

"Okay, look guys, bees," Techno tried to distract them as he peered into the windows of his bee farm where the fat little puffballs happily buzzed about, landing on flowers and bumping into the glass.

The chatter didn't take kindly to being dismissed.

__

_TECHNODUMB!LISTEN!BLOODFORTHEBLOODGOD!KILL!!!HELPHIMSAVEPHIL!TOMMY'SSCARED!_

Techno clenched his jaw and winced as pain laced up his upper jaw. He gingerly reached up and felt his mouth, wincing as his hands drifted over two raised tusks protruding from his lips, further out of his jaw than they had been this morning.

The bloodlust was calling. As he realized it, he felt his heart quicken and his vision faded into scarlet for a dark moment.

"Chat. stop," Techno's voice was low and the chat dulled for a moment allowing him to close his eyes and hold his head. Only a moment, though, as they came back full force demanding his attention and power.

__

_Bloodforthebloodgodbloodforthebloodkingskullsfortheskullthrone **BLOODFORTHEBLOODGOD**_

Techno snarled and stumbled through the snow to the stable where a familiar horse nickered softly. Carl walked to the edge of the fence, recognizing Techno's turmoil. The broad horse gently nudged the hybrid. With a shaky hand, Techno reached up and began to stroke Carl's snout.

The chatter faded away as Techno focused solely on his steed. Carl nudged his face and sniffed for any loose carrots or apples hidden in the folds of Techno's thick blue fur-lined robes. The horse's breaths were slow and calm, his hair short and coarse under Techno's callused hands. Carl's mane was smooth from the constant grooming and when he shook his head it danced like little waves in the arctic wind.

Carl didn't shift away from his master's hand, as if he knew how much Techno needed this, the grounding sensation of having another living creature present and breathing, a creature he didn't want to kill a creature who's blood wouldn't quell that annoying call in the back of his mind as _we want blood, blood for the blood god, kill everything let the blood color the snow let the cries fill the air blood for the blood god!_

Techno hissed and pressed his face against Carl's, feeling the horse nudge him back with a gentle nicker as Techno's hands methodically stroked his neck.

Maybe Carl just liked Techno because the pig hybrid fed him but Techno liked to think that maybe... maybe he was just gifted with one of the best horses in all the worlds.

Techno finally let out an easy breath as the voices faded for a moment. Carl impatiently stamped a hoof and shook his head.

Techno knew the voices would return as soon as his mind wandered, they'd be back with their ear-splitting demands and warnings that made no sense and gave him nothing but a yearning for destruction.

Gently, Techno launched over the fence and landed next to Carl who shifted on his hooves happily, knowing what was next.

The warrior hauled himself up into the horse's fine saddle, listening to the clinking of the diamond horse armor that Carl adorned like a royal steed. Techno rubbed the chain mail over Carl's neck and took a deep breath as he took the reigns, the familiar worn leather felt soft in his rough hands and he relished in that texture.

"We'll go as fast and far as you want, just run," Techno ordered softly. Carl's ear twitched before the horse allowed Techno to lead him towards the gate that was always left unlocked.

"YA!" Techno ordered, snapping the reigns with a flick of his wrist and nudging Carl onwards with a gentle tap of his heel. It was all the horse needed.

With a fierce whinny, Carl charged forward, knocking the gate open and leaving it swinging on its hinges as the horse sprinted across the snowy fields, throwing up a spray of frosted snow diamonds behind him. Techno loosed his grip on the reigns and closed his eyes as Carl charged onward. The wind bit his ears and nose as it raced by, wailing its haunting northern tune but it was a welcome change from the cacophony Techno was used to, it drowned out the voices perfectly.

The two raced over the landscape with no true direction or purpose except the freeing feeling of running. Running without needing to look back.

~~~

It was nearly evening when Carl's hooves finally led them home. The horse was breathing heavily as it trotted back over the familiar terrain but Techno knew the steed well enough to know that the run had brightened the broad horse's spirits. Carl wasn't the fastest nor the best jumper, but he was strong and had the stamina of his master. As Techno dismounted, his leg muscles moaned from the hours spent in the saddle, it was nice - to feel familiar fatigue. It was distracting, at least. He pulled a golden carrot out of his coat and offered it to the horse who crunched down on it gratefully before nudging Techno again and nibbling on his hair.

"Ha. No, no more carrots for you. I mean come on - you'll be hyper all night you fool. I'll get you some hay and then you should sleep," Techno denied as he led Carl back into his stable where the pig-hybrid took extra care to set up a warm bed of hay and fill the food trough as Carl lapped up freshwater for the adjacent bucket that Techno had been forced to break the ice on.

As Techno went to leave the stable Carl nickered after him, it almost sounded like a goodnight. Techno looked back and smiled. He'd heard so many voices in his life that it wasn't out of the question that his horse would gain a voice as well.

"Night Carl, thanks."

With that, Techno opened the door and stepped inside his stone lower floor, stomping his boots to dislodge some of the snow from them. The warmth of his home was a strange yet welcoming contradiction to the freedom he'd found on the back of a horse with the freezing wind in his face.

__

_tommyneedshelptommyiscomingphilzaneedshelpdreamiscomingphilzaneedshelptommycomes_

The voices had been a constant lull in the back of his mind and now in the silence of his house, they were growing in volume. Techno could accept that, he'd escaped and ignored them for most of the day so a painful evening could be their payback.

__

_CheckoutsideTommyiscomingDreamhurtphilPhilneedshelpTommyiscomingHelptommyKill_

Techno's brows furrowed as he strained to make out some semblance of words in the droning and calling of the voices.

"What's wrong with Phil?" he asked the chatter.

__

_PhilzaneedshelpKilldreamHelptommyTommyneedshelpGohelpthemHidefromdreamSavephil_

Tommy? Philza? Dream?

Techno strained to make out any context of the chatter's desperate begging.

__

_Tommyneedshelp Watchoutfordream Philzafoughtandgothurt Tommyiscoming Philzaishurt_

"What do you mean Philza fought and got hurt? Guys, come on, he's better than nearly everyone here!" Techno laughed as he waved the chatters usually antics aside. They had been in a mood all day so it wasn't surprising they were trying to rile him up for no reason. They liked to send him on wild goose chases for the fun of it (though he suspected they were really just waiting for him to snap and lash out, they loved it when he did that). They'd taunt him with Phill all the time because they knew, they _knew_ that Techno cared for Phil and would drop everything to help him.

"Guys, Phil would reach out if he needed something," he scoffed as they seemed to insist. Anything to make him angry - anything to trigger his bloodlust.

__

_Tommy is coming Dream hurt Phil Kill Dream Save Phil Kill Tommy Tommy is coming Help_

Techno sighed and sat down next to Edward, staring into the fire that he'd just thrown another log on. They were insistent...

__

_TOMMY IS HURT SAVE TOMMY! KILL TOMMY! KILL DREAM!! BLOOD!! SAVE PHIL!! GO GO GO!!_

Aaaaand, now they were shouting at him. He groaned and put his head in his hands pressing the heel of his palms against his temple which was pounding with insistent shouting.

__

_OUTSIDE! TOMMY IS OUTSIDE!! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!! SAVE TOMMY! KILL TOMMY! eee SAVE PHIL! CARL!! TOMMY COLD!! TOMMY NEEDS HELP! KILL DREAM! PHIL HURT! DADZA!! BLOODFORTHEBLOODGOD!!TOMMYNEEDSHELP!HELPPHILZA!KILL!!DEATH!DREAMHUNT!KILL!_

Techno inhaled sharply as the voices started screaming again causing Edward to give a concerned "vroop" as his purple eyes gazed into the flame but his abnormally long arm extended to nudge Techno. Techno leaned away before the otherworldly creature could try and comfort him.

"Chat, chatter, stop. Okay? Tommy is exiled, he doesn't want my help and I don't want to help him. Philza would contact me if he needed help, okay? Okay??"

A wooden step caved under an unfamiliar footstep and squeaked.

Techno's ears twitched as he looked towards his door uncertainly. The voices were all starting to die away as a familiar chant rang over and over in his head. His hand drifting to the leather-bound handle of his sword as he slowly drew the dark blade before venturing over to the door.

__

_Blood for the Blood God Blood for the Blood God Blood for the Blood God Blood for the Blood -_

Someone had walked up his front staircase, he was certain. A monster, perhaps, or a mutated beast but those things usually announced their presence with some haunting call... only other humans or hybrids were this silent in approach unless it was a creeper - which was entirely possible.

Techno braced himself as he touched the handle of the door and prepared to carve the twisted green sulfur-infused monster in half as he ripped the door open. 

It was Tommy. Tommy was there. On his porch. Tommy was there on his porch.

It took a moment to register. A moment that sent the boy scrambling down the stairs in a blind panic.

"Tommy - wait, Tommy!?" Techno cried as the boy ran down the stairs. The boy's feet caught on one another in his mad scramble, sending him tumbling down the last few steps and slamming into the snow at the bottom. Instead of getting up and continuing to run, the boy curled up around himself, covering his vital organs and shielding his face as Techno ran down the stairs after him.

The voices were still screaming incomprehensible words but Techno pushed them aside. What the hell was this!? Why was Tommy doing here?

"Tommy?" Techno asked as he reached the bottom of the stairs and looked down at the sobbing boy laying at his feet.

Now that he had a moment, Techno looked over the boy and immediately recognized what bad shape he was in - as if the sobbing and whimpering hadn't clued him in. The boy was in short sleeves (which was a death sentence out here) and his clothes were basically old rags being held together by miraculous stitching. His skin had turned a ghastly white and Techno had a sneaking suspicion that frostbite was setting in on his fingers based on their dark complexion.

"Please - please, I'm sorry, I didn't know - " Tommy begged, his eyes squeezed shut and his body shuddering both from the cold and in terror.

__

_Take him inside Keep him safe He's so cold Protect him! kill Tommy? Tommy! Help him_

That was a new tone. Techno couldn't pay any mind to the surprising gentleness of the chatter's mutterings or how even the constant cries for blood had fallen by the wayside and were nothing but dull hummings. He couldn't take time away to get a sense of how protective the chatter had suddenly gotten, how they all seemed to reach out for the boy in front of him and cling to him as they did once long ago to a young piglin hybrid boy in a similar predicament...

Techno only saw Tommy. Tommy, wrapped in shadows and snow with frosted skin and chapped lips. He knelt down and gently reached out, touching the boy's skin as he tried to figure out how to pick him up out of the snow casket he was in. Tommy flinched so viciously from Techno's soft touch that Techno recoiled in equal quickness.

The voices screamed in boiling rage.

__

_KILL DREAM! KILL! BLOOD!! He's Hurt! Help Him!! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!! Monster!!_

Techno swallowed a lump in his throat and tried to force himself to move despite the voices in his head that were reminding him of much more unsavory times. Times when he'd flinched and cried and begged for the voices to leave and curled up just to make the pain go away and - NO! 

Techno surged forward and picked Tommy up despite the boy's sobs and the way he tried to weakly thrash away as he screamed apologies out of a hoarse throat.

He was so light. Techno nearly dropped him in shock as he realized how thin and light the boy was in his arms. Any attempts the boy made to break through were weaker than that of a newborn wolf pup and too quickly did Tommy stop trying to break free, revealing his shattered spirit. Techno had hardly ascended three steps when Tommy stopped fighting, curling further around himself as he sobbed harder and begged for forgiveness as he accepted his fate.

Techno felt his tusks push through his lips as the voices screamed louder.

Not Tommy. Tommy never gave up, never gave in, he stayed resilient and stubborn and stupid and...

broken.

Gods, the child seemed broken now, like a limp little doll discarded in the gutter.

Techno pushed through his open door and his eyes darted to the crackling fire by which Edward was still sitting.

Warming Tommy up directly in this state could do more harm than good, so without hesitation, Techno slung Tommy over one shoulder and climbed up his ladder with one steady hand until he was in his bedroom.

Tommy was still sobbing, his hands twisted in Techno's thick fur coat as his broken pleas faded into whimpers... one of his hands. The other was locked around a familiar compass that made Techno's blood freeze as he recognized it.

As gently as he could manage, Techno lowered Tommy into the soft bed and watched the boy's delusional mind prepared him for harm making him tense and whimper. With equal gentleness, Techno reached out and pulled the compass from Tommy's freezing grip.

Phil's compass.

__

_PHIL! PHILZA HURT!! SAVE PHIL!!! DADZA BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!! HELP TOMMY!! Phil!_

Techno may have listened to the voices under different circumstances. He was seconds away from tearing away and mounting to Carl to go find his friend... but another whimper from Tommy stilled that urge as Techno took in the boy's appearance. In the light of the candles, Tommy's state nearly made Techno break something in rage. His vision turned a gentle shade of pink as he took it all in:

Bruises and scarring, burns and shrapnel scars, wounds that were newly adorned on the boy, but all of that was outdone by the hideous darkening skin on Tommy's exposed feet and fingertips.

Techno ran a hand through his hair to try and ground himself as his mind raced with the voices. So much harm, so much to try and fix.

Water... he needed water, to soak the frostbitten areas.

__

_"You shouldn't directly warm frostbitten areas, mate. The best way is to slowly soak it back to life. Put anything frostbitten near an open fire and you may as well just stick your hand in a furnace. And don't you chug that regen potion either if you're exhausted. These things can drain the last of stamina and kill you. You'll wounds will stitch up but it won't help anything if you're untouched and dead."_

Phil had taught him that. Phil had told him that as he stuck Techno's numb fingers in a bowl of water that he couldn't even feel. Phil's gentle callused hands hadn't been shaking as he talked, Phil's voice hadn't wavered all that while as Techno's color had returned to his hands. Phil hadn't flinched when Techno had whimpered.

Techno's hands shook. They shook as he wrapped Tommy's fingers in a warm washcloth and listened to the whimpers in the flickering candlelight. They shook as he pulled Tommy into a seated position to dip his feet into a porcelain bowl. 

Techno's voice wavered. It wavered as he took off his cloak and wrapped it around Tommy, unsure of how to calm him and tell him it was okay. It shook as he muttered to the chatter, holding Tommy still for that long eternity until the color had returned to Tommy's toes and the boy was fast asleep on his shoulders (he'd either slipped into an exhausted slumber or had passed out, Techno was terrified that he didn't know the answer).

Techno wasn't Philza, he wasn't good at this survival stuff or this "saving people" situation. He fought and killed and sometimes he dressed wounds. That... that he could do; wounds, blood, all that he could fix.

He could deal with the bruises and the scarring, hardly blinking as he treated the scrapes and scratches on Tommy's face and arms that looked to be from tree branches and such. He could wrap bruised ribs and clean old infected wounds. He could do that and take in the fact that he could count all of Tommy's ribs, notice the gaunt appearance of the lanky child, note the evidence of trauma that adorned Tommy like a painting.

The chatter noticed too... and they screamed for blood. Not Tommys, which was strange, usually they loved to try and tempt Techno into doing something that he knew he would regret when they saw someone vulnerable. They liked to toy and torture and ruin... but now... now they only screamed for vengeance.

It made no sense but Techno didn't care to pay any attention to it until Tommy was safely tucked in his thick comforter with a new wool shirt, thick wool socks, and a better color to his cheeks.

His feet felt heavy as Techno trudged down the ladder and plopped down next to Edward, pressing his hands to his face as he took in what just happened. Edward gave a small hum and Techno nodded, not sure what he was agreeing to but not caring.

"It's a mess," Techno concurred, slowly sitting up and running a hand through his loose hair.

Edward let out another small sound, one Techno ignored. Techno forced himself to calm down, shoved the chatter to the back of his mind as he tuned into the air around him - the world he was in. He wanted so badly to talk to Phil, to check-in, to make sure he was alright...

Minutes passed, long and slow, scraping against Techno's sanity as his hands shook. The chatter didn't help. They screamed that Phill needed him, that Phil was hurt, that Tommy needed help, that Dream needed to die... That the blood god was hungry.

Techno's fist slammed into the wall, the slam echoing through the house. Edward didn't even flinch but let out a small "vroop" as Techno struggled to control his breathing. Anger and fear pumped through his body like adrenaline, nearly drowning out the chanting that was growing in volume like a horror-filled symphony.

"I'll be back," Techno growled, not sure who he was talking to as he stomped toward the door, his sword brandished and his blood pounding. He threw his door open and stepped out into the frosty air that showed just how his breath streamed from his tusked mouth. Red, he saw red.

__

_BLOODFORTHEBLOODGODBLOODFORTHEBLOODGODBLOODFORTHEBLOODGODBLOODFORTHEBLOODGOD_

The chatter knew what this meant and they cheered as Technoblade carved through the monsters he found traversing his homestead. They screamed in jubilee as the monster's guts and mutation's blood splattered and colored the pristine snow giving Techno that familiar rush of euphoria.

It was near morning when Techno felt calm enough to re-enter the house. His tusks had shrunk back down to manageable size and his sword was wet with a collection of monster blood. As he approached the stairs of his home, his foot caught on something solid. He looked down and found his boot caught on the brown strap of a familiar porcelain mask that glimmered in the morning sun. With unsure hands Techno reached down and picked up the mask, turning it over expecting to see the smiley face but found himself staring at a blank mask with two simple holes for eyes.

It wasn't Dream's mask. Dream's mask didn't actually have any holes for his eyes. The guy didn't need to see to fight. This wasn't Dream's mask...

But it lay where Techno had picked Tommy up last night.

Was it... Tommys?

Techno uncertainly studied the mask as he walked inside, deciding to lay it atop one of the chests for the moment. He then turned his attention to his sword which needed to be wiped clean and likely sharpened after the night he had. With surprising gentleness, he pulled out a rag from his cloak and started wiping the blood off of the black blade. 

He scrubbed at the thick black zombie blood and dusted away the bone powder, careful to keep his bare skin away from the toxic spider fluid and mindful to light a candle to overpower the stink of sulfur from the black creeper blood.

He had reached for the whetstone he kept above the fire when he heard a clatter from above.

He quickly resheathed the sword and climbed the ladder in record time as he reached his bedroom where he found Tommy sprawled on the floor trying to untangle himself from the blankets.

"TECHNOBLADE!?" Tommy cried as he took in the warrior's visage.

"Tommy - " Techno began.

"WHAT THE FUCK! WHERE AM I?! - Wha - WHAT!?" Tommy was looking around like a frightened cornered rabbit and Techno had a feeling that if he moved too fast, Tommy would flee like one.

"Tommy, breathe," Techno tried to quell.

"YOU BREATHE YOURSELF, BITCH!" Tommy managed as he seemed to hyperventilate.

Well... at least he was still Tommy.

"But... I... what are you doing here?" Tommy breathed as he scrambled out of the blankets and backed away to the far end of the room.

"This is my house, Tommy," Techno sighed.

"What? No... no... really?"

Techno laughed, "Well what did you think this place was Tommy?"

"No - no Phil wouldn't send me to you," Tommy denied, his hands starting to shake.

"Tommy... what happened to Phil?" Techno tried to sound gentle but his chest had seized at the mention of Philza.

"I - I - I don't know. Why do you care? BITCH! STAY BACK!" Tommy raised his fists shakily and stared at Techno.

"Tommy, calm down. I'm not gonna hurt you," Techno soothed, voting to ignore the voices that were recommending he do otherwise. Honestly, one moment they were cooing over the broken boy, and the next they were all up for sacrificing him for sport.

"Pfft, like I'd believe a bitch boy like you," Tommy stated, trying so hard to sound brave.

It was ruined by the loud growl that erupted from Tommy's stomach. Tommy paled and Techno raised an eyebrow. The gaunt boy should be starving, he looked like he hadn't eaten a solid meal in a while.

"Come on, I'll get you some soup," Techno sighed as he went back down the ladder, his mind on the plethora of mushrooms he had ready to be stewed.

In the next half-an-hour or so Techno had a reluctant Tommy sitting at the table devouring his bowl of mushroom soup like some animal.

"So you really live where?" Tommy asked with a bit of mushroom stuck on the side of his mouth. The boy's wide, yet strangely dim, blue eyes wandered and judged as he looked around the quaint house.

"Yes," Techno nodded.

Tommy let out a judgemental 'huh' that Techno chose to ignore.

"Reminds me of that cottagecore shit," Tommy supposed making Techno almost choke on his mushroom stew.

"What!?" Techno demanded which made Tommy devolve into laughter. "You - you - you come into my house and I fix you up and feed you and this is how you repay me, by mocking my construction skills!?"

"Hell yeah, bitch!" Tommy snickered.

Techno was going to retort when there was a heavy knock on the door that made both inhabitants freeze.

Tommy turned a pale sheet of white, his hands started trembling and, for a moment, Techno really thought he was about to start screaming. Slowly, Techno stood and walked over to the door, drawing his sword and putting an ear to the door.

"Is it Dream?" Tommy's voice was barely above a whimper.

Techno hadn't had time to question Tommy about what had happened or what Dream had to do with any of this but the fear in Tommy's voice spoke for itself. If it was Dream, they had trouble. Techno peered out of the window, looking for the green hoodie or familiar fake smile... and managed to glimpse a green and white bucket hat.

"Phil?" Techno questioned as he opened the door and found himself staring at a battered and bleeding Philza. The man let out a pained breath and looked longingly at Technoblade, his left eye closed as blood poured out of a gash in his forehead.

"Please for the love of all things tell me Tommy is safe," Philza rasped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RIP Edward. HONESTLY, I write him into one fanfiction and the poor enderman gets eaten alive by wolves next stream... it's rough. May the fire-side enderman rest in peace. He will be remembered.
> 
> Y'all, this is the last chapter for a while. Don't expect me to post again in the next three days. I'm focusing all of my energy on channeling Tubbo and I've got to make this next chapter work so give me a moment (Dream's being manipulative again and I've got to make the writing good ~) - it'll take a week or two at most (i swear), though I hope to chug it out in a few days. We'll see.
> 
> Also - Techno's my fav (so there's absolutely NO bias in this chapter whatsoever - nope, what are you talking about?)


	6. Shattered Glass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *slams table* Tubbo is traumatized and too good for this world!!  
> Also - the green man stages a suicide (but not his own).

It had been a good day for Tubbo so far. He'd spent a wonderful morning with the bees, checking on the hives, harvesting the honey, and all-around simply making sure all of the little fuzzballs were happy with their warm greenhouse and colorful flowers. His hands still smelled of honey and nectar which was something soothing to distract him from the paperwork and arguing that had plagued the board meeting for L'Manburg's Cabinet.

They were plotting to bring Technoblade to justice. Quackity was certain it was a worthy cause (at least it seemed that way by how adamant he was about it) and honestly, Tubbo couldn't help but understand...

Technoblade had gotten away with hurting a lot of people. Everyone had some aspect of bad blood with the man and some of it just... wouldn't go away. Yes, Techno was gone and for that Tubbo was (and should be) relieved. He didn't want that man anywhere near him - near anyone.

But a small, tiny part of him was angry: angry that Technoblade could destroy so much of their home and get away with it - just like Dream. Tommy burns down a house and gets exiled but Technoblade - Technoblade can just walk away like he didn't ruin everything...

He can just forget about everyone he's hurt?

  
_"Te-Technoblade!"_  


_"Tubbo... Tubbo, I'm sorry."_

__

_There was so much light and color and GODS HE WAS BURNING AND -_

Tubbo put his head in his hands and breathed in the sweet scent of nectar, the tightness in his chest vanishing as the burn scars that ran up his chest tingled. He was okay. It was okay. There were no fireworks or rocket launchers or boxes. There was no execution and no Schlatt...

"So, what do you think Tubbo?" Quackity's voice stirred Tubbo out of his thoughts.

"What?" Tubbo snapped into attention.

"We know Philza has information on Technoblade. I'm almost certain he knows where the bastard is," Quackity repeated coldly. "If anyone can lead us to the pig, it's Philza."

Tubbo had only seen Quackity like this once before; when he was plotting the coup against Schlatt. There was hidden anger in his gaze that made him seem more like a cold-hearted killer than the mischievous shape-shifter they all knew and loved.

Quackity hated Technoblade. Everyone knew that. The shifter, like all of them, had danced world to world but he had apparently seen what "The Blade" was capable of. Tubbo remembered when the warlord had entered the world, how the realization had sent shivers down everyone's spines, and the blatant terror that had filled Quackity's being. The Vice President of Schlatt's regime had spent the rest of the day in his room when he learned of the warlord's arrival all those months ago.

Whatever Technoblade had done to Quackity had created a rift that would never heal, and knowing Technoblade, Tubbo couldn't blame Quackity for that. Tubbo's hands drifted to his chest where beneath his baggy green wool shirt lay the ugly scarring that came when you were shot point-blank with a rocket launcher.

Techno was good at forming wounds that never truly healed.

"Philza should - he should help us!" Fundy chirped hopefully, his ears perking up out of his bright orange hair. "He's my grandpa, he'll help me. He knows how much Techno hurt us, he'll totally understand."

He was not met with equal hope. Quackity had crossed his arms and seemed to doubt that statement as much as Tubbo did. Philza was... nice. He hadn't done anything to make anyone question him but he also was distant - 

He was always good at being distant.

Philza was nice, but he may as well be a stranger to the L'Manburg people. His motivations were unknown and his loyalties questionable. Being a nice guy didn't always mean that he had the country's best interest. Being a nice person didn't make you loyal.

Because... wasn't Tubbo a nice person? And... and he had been a traitor once.

_There was ash in his lungs, choking his screams. He couldn't breathe - he could BREATHE! Everything burned and it wouldn't stop - MAKE IT STOP!_

Nectar... his sleeves still smelled like flowers and nectar. Not ash. They smelled of spring and dew and... and peace. He was okay.

Ranboo, who had been unnaturally quiet all this time finally opened his mouth and, hesitating only momentarily, put forward his thoughts.

"Phil and Techno have been friends for a long time... I don't know if he'll just betray him like that," the enderman hybrid murmured.

"Well it's Technoblade or L'Manburg, you can't pick both," Quackity sneered. Ranboo flickered, though whether in uncertainty or fear, Tubbo couldn't tell. Ranboo seemed to be jumpier nowadays though Tubbo had yet to figure out why. He made a mental note to go hang out with the guy later, see if there was anything he could do to help.

"So, it's settled. We ask Phil for help, find Technoblade, and then bring him back here for a trial and an execution." Tubbo was glad he could make this final. There wasn't so much a concrete plan as a list of objectives to meet, but that was alright, it left room for flexibility.

"We just have to wait for Phil to get back," Ranboo murmured.

Everyone's head suddenly turned to the tall boy who flickered instinctively as all of the eyes fell on him.

"Why? Where did Phil go?" Quackity demanded making Ranboo jump.

"Take it easy Quackity," Tubbo tried to diffuse. 

"No! I'm not gonna take it easy! I just saw Phil yesterday!!" Quackity hissed.

"H-he went to go..." Ranboo's voice failed him and the boy desperately fumbled around as he tried to pull a book out of his suit pocket. He flipped through the pages and quickly scanned over the pages. "I... I didn't write down where he went... I don't know. But... it had something to do with To..." the halfbreed's voice died out quickly as he looked down into his lap.

"Dammit! Ranboo! Come ON!" Quackity moaned, throwing himself back into his chair and slumping in it dramatically.

"I'm sorry," Ranboo murmured, ashamed and embarrassed. Tubbo threw him the kindest look he could manage which seemed to calm the tall half-breed a bit.

"It's okay. Phil will come back and when he does we'll be ready," Tubbo assured the two cabinet members. "He'll tell us how to find Technoblade and then we'll bring him to justice. Technoblade will pay for what he did to L'Manburg and then... maybe some wounds will heal."

"It'll send a message," Quackity pressed. "We kill Technoblade and we prove we can't be walked over. Not by Techno, not by Dream, and not by any other fucking big-shot who thinks they can run this country. But now, we gotta wait for Phil."

"We just wait for Philza to come back," Tubbo soothed, somewhat bothered by that phrase.

__

_"It'll send a message"_

Why did that bother him? He brought his sleeves back up to his face and breathed in that familiar smell of honey once more. It was okay - he was okay.

"It gives us plenty of time to work on our costumes!" Fundy smiled. Tubbo grinned at the eagerness of the fox hybrid.

Quackity wasn't so easily dissuaded. He grumbled about Phil's absence for the rest of the day, his eyes every so often glancing at the vacant survivor's house as he and Tubbo walked the streets of L'Manburg. Tubbo liked these familiar streets - liked the way the wood creaked under his feet in a familiar little tune of wood and nail. It was nice. It was home.

"We could just look through his stuff now - see if there's anything that can lead up to Techno," Quackity muttered, his eyes still glued on Philza's front door, probably trying to manifest Phil into existence.

"We can't go through his stuff," Tubbo reprimanded. "Phil may help us! We can't just assume he's an enemy and... and just go through his things. Then - Then he'll be angry for sure and we'll have made another enemy."

"Tubbo, if he's hanging out with Techno, he's already an enemy," Quackity grumbled.

Tubbo thought of the pleasant elder with his bright smile and kind words. He thought of how Wilbur would sit him and Tommy down years and years ago to tell them about his father. How Philza was a warrior who had a kind soul. How Philza was powerful and harsh on his enemies but gentle with those he cared for.

Tubbo wasn't so sure about Wilbur's stories anymore...

Tubbo found he thought about Wilbur a lot more nowadays. Not the Wilbur of L'Manburg or the crazed maniac who pressed the button that had carved out the crater Tubbo's new home was built on, but the old and kind Wilbur who had taught him how to plant flowers and harvest honey. The Wilbur who smelled like nectar and parchment, whose fingers danced across guitar strings, and whose voice sounded like a summer's day, all warm and bright.

Tubbo missed that Wilbur.

He missed Tommy too.

Instinctively, Tubbo reached over and felt the small dented compass that was strapped to his wrist like a watch. He traced the broken glass on its face, his fingertips running along that spiderwebs of cracks that spread over the glass, his eyes on the red arrow that spun randomly now, broken beyond repair.

"Hey, Pres, you okay?" Quackity's stirred Tubbo back to the present once more and slowly Tubbo pulled his baggy sleeves back over the watch. It was nice not having to wear a suit all the time even if it made him look unprofessional. Quackity had scolded him at first but... but Tubbo hated suits and Quackity hadn't pushed. 

Suits made him look different - 

Like...

Like Schlatt.

"I'm... I think so," Tubbo murmured. Quackity took in a gentle breath and put a hand on Tubbo's shoulders.

"Hey, Tubbo, if you need someone to -" the shapeshifter began.

"GIRANAMOOOOO!" a distant cry filled the air pulling Tubbo and Quackity's attention towards one of the many stairwells that led into L'Manburg where Fundy, Niki, and Ranboo were all sledding down in what looked like dented mine carts, Fundy leading the way as his human form shifted into his anthropomorphic fox form that was grinning with a mouth full of bright teeth.

Niki was cheering as she followed the fox, her arms full with a bouquet of flowers that left a trail of petals in her wake - petals which were flying into a terrified-looking Ranboo's face. The half-breed clenched the side of the minecart like his life depended on it, his existence fading in and out of vision as his scream rose into something more like a shriek of an Enderman.

"Madre de Dios, ¿qué pasa con estas personas?," Quackity muttered as he shook his head at the antics. "What are they doing?"

The group reached the bottom of the stairs, skidding on the wood before Fundy leaped out and cheered, moving to drag the minecart back up the stairs.

Tubbo giggled and grinned as he watched the trio immediately start climbing back up the stairs, Ranboo seeming a bit hesitant with the idea as he shakily exited his own minecart. Niki was saying something about delivering flowers through her giggles but most of her words were lost to the distance.

They were having fun. It was nice to see... It seemed to feel like with every passing day this country felt more and more deserted. Everyone was quiet nowadays, spending more time away... having fun elsewhere...

Tubbo's hand drifted back to the compass on his wrist as he remembered familiar shenanigans...

It had been a while since he'd done something stupid... something fun...

He missed Tommy.

"Looks exciting," a new voice carved through Tubbo's thoughts and made Quackity whirl around with a hand on the hilt of his sword.

"Dream?" Tubbo knew that voice. His skin crawled a bit as he turned around and found the masked man a few steps behind him.

The boards of L'Manburg's piers never seemed to creak under Dream's shoes. Everything in L'Manburg was quieter when Dream was present.

It was a strange paradox. Dream brought Tubbo some comfort and advice but he was the reason for so much hardship. Tubbo wasn't sure if he should smile and greet the masked man or scowl and cross his arms.

Well, he decided to smile and Quackity decided to scowl so... all of the bases were covered.

"What are you doing here?" Quackity's demand was cold and sharp, grating past Tubbo's ears but seemingly running off Dream's mind like water off a duck's back. There was nothing that could phase him it seemed.

"Tubbo... can we talk?" Dream asked - it was strangely gentle, not the typical demand Tubbo was used to. That was how Dream spoke when he wanted to offer advice or play a game of chess or make sure Tubbo was alright. That tone put Tubbo at ease a bit as his smile became a bit more real and his eyes softened.

"Sure, let's talk," Quackity scowled, Dream's tone meaning nothing to him.

"Tubbo," Dream repeated. "I need to talk to _you_."

"I'm his Vice Pres - you can talk to both of -" Quackity began angrily.

"It's fine Big Q," Tubbo soothed. "Sure Dream!"

Dream nodded and gestured for Tubbo to follow as he slowly began walking towards the outskirts of L'Manburg.

"Tubbo..." Quackity began, his voice wavering for a moment.

"It'll be fine, Dream's a friend," Tubbo assured the man as he put on his best face of confidence and jogged to catch up to the masked figure. He risked a glance back at Quackity who seemed to be watching him leave with worry on his features.

Tubbo forced himself to swallow a lump in his throat and put on a bright smile as he looked away and came to Dream's side.

"What's up, Dream?" Tubbo asked hopefully as he fell into pace with the taller man.

"... It's been rather peaceful around here, don't you think?" Dream hung the question in the air with... uncertainty?

Was - was Dream _uncertain?_

"Uh - uh yeah, I think so. I mean, it's been quiet at least," Tubbo answered. Why was Dream asking? What did he want? He always wanted something it seemed - 

"You're a good president, Tubbo," Dream's praise sent all of those thoughts fleeing as Tubbo felt his jaw drop for a moment.

"Wh - wait, really?" Tubbo asked, his voice shaking as his eyes lit up. Those words had been so... so warm and... and real. Was, was Dream being honest? It sounded honest.

"You've made hard decisions and because of those decisions, you've made this place better," Dream nodded gesturing to the city outskirts. 

They were still walking. Tubbo was following Dream now, and a small part of him wondered where they were going, but the rest of him felt like glowing because - because Dream really thought he was doing alright? Dream knew more about this leadership-stuff than Tubbo ever did... Dream could make a room grow quiet with a single word and shoot out orders that went unquestioned. If - if he thought Tubbo was doing alright, then maybe Tubbo wasn't messing up as bad as he feared?

"I mean... If you say so," Tubbo smiled to himself as he looked down. His chest was warm now and it felt like his shoulders had grown a bit lighter.

"That's why I'm coming to you for help," Dream murmured, stopping at the very edge of L'Manburg.

Tubbo felt the world grow still for a moment as he stopped and turned to look the godling over, his eyes wide with shock.

"Y- you need - you need my help?" Tubbo stuttered.

"I would like it," Dream concurred. "If you help me, I would owe you a favor - to make it even."

Tubbo fumbled for a moment, his mind full of discombobulated thoughts and questions.

What did Dream need help with? Why would he come to Tubbo? What could Tubbo do? It... it made no sense.

Why...

What could a favor from Dream be worth?

"So... could you help me out for a bit?" Dream asked again. His white mask had tilted a bit reminding Tubbo of a questioning dog cocking its head in confusion.

"Wh- Yes! Absolutely. What do you need?" Tubbo asked, perhaps a bit more forceful than he meant.

"I've heard that you have a compass that points to Tommy," Dream asked softly - something was wrong. Dream's voice was never soft.

"Well... yes," Tubbo murmured, his hand drifting up and wrapping around his wrist that held the compass shrouded in his large sleeves.

"Then I need you and your compass to come with me, quickly," Dream urged. The man suddenly was striding towards the distant nether portal, his green cloak flowing behind him. Tubbo hesitated.

Why... why would he need his compass? What - what did Tommy have to do with any of this?

Tubbo gripped his wrist before releasing a long breath and taking pursuit. His chest was closing around his heart as a terrible feeling started to curl around in his gut.

"Dr- wait, Dream, why do you need to know where Tommy is?" Tubbo asked as he took pursuit.

Dream stayed silent for a moment - a moment that took too long.

"Did - did something happen? Is he okay?" Tubbo pleaded as he scrambled to Dream's side.

What was wrong? What had happened!?

Dream slowed for a moment and took a long breath. Tubbo's eyes were fixed on that expressionless smile while his gut churned in anxiety. Slowly, that bleached mask turned to look Tubbo in the eyes which made Tubbo feel as if he was shrinking under that beady look.

"I don't know, Tubbo," Dream's soft voice was a sharp contradiction to the unsettling smile that stared Tubbo down. "That's why I need you. Now come on."

Tubbo opened his mouth to ask another question when Dream's gloved hand reached out and grabbed his arm, dragging him along with ease. Tubbo stumbled for a moment as he was hastily led away, his throat closing as he sorted through the plethora of questions that were slamming in his skull.

They reached the foot of the obsidian portal and didn't even take a moment to hesitate. Dream plunged into the swirling purples hues and dragged Tubbo along, releasing him as they stepped into the boiling heat of the Nether.

"I went to visit Tommy yesterday," Dream prefaced as he quickly took off down a strange new path of cobblestone and green clay. Tubbo hesitated once more as he looked at the path - it was new... When had this been built?

How long... how long had it been since Tubbo had been in the Nether? He tried to remember but it seemed like it had been so long, he'd been so busy - there had been so much to do and think about and...

and he really didn't want to go and tempt himself. Because he if came to the nether then he'd...

He'd want to go see Tommy. Because Tommy was only a few steps away, he was only a pathway away, he was only - 

He was going to see Tommy.

Tubbo felt his chest seize and warm all at once at the thought. He was going to where Tommy was exiled... what should he say? Was Tommy angry at - that was a stupid question, of course, Tommy was angry at him, of course, he hated him.

Tubbo felt like there was a monster in his stomach, tearing away at him as anxiety bubbled in his gut.

"And well... it was a mess," Dream's continuation pulled Tubbo away from his thoughts.

"What?" Tubbo asked, quickly jogging over the cobble and clay to catch up. "What's a mess?

Dream's pace was fast and Tubbo found himself having to jog every few steps just to keep up.

"Logstedshire," Dream murmured darkly.

Tubbo felt his gut drop again.

"Wh-what do you mean by mess? L-like Tommy isn't doing well or - "

"Tommy's gone," Dream admitted finally, his voice seemed wrung with some unfamiliar emotion.

"Gone?" Tubbo echoed breathlessly. Gone? What did he mean gone? Tommy had left - he'd run? Or... yes, he must've run.

"I've been visiting Tommy these last few weeks," Dream explained simply. "He'd been getting lonely and... well... he was off these last few visits."

"Off?" Tubbo couldn't explain why his throat was constricting him. He felt like the world was a blur as they approached that portal... Tommy's portal.

"Off - like, acting strange and saying... things," Dream concurred, finally coming to rest at the foot of the portal. Tubbo went to step in when Dream's hand intercepted him.

"Tubbo... what you're about to see... it isn't going to be pretty Tubbo," Dream warned gently.

Tubbo could hardly breathe. He needed to see, he needed to know what all this was about. He pushed through Dream's hold hardly registering what he had done until he was stumbling out the other end.

It was raining, Tubbo had known it was going to rain today - the red sky at dawn had told him that and the bees were always more sluggish before the rains came. He had been given a warning about the rain - he could expect it

B-but...

But...

Tubbo felt as a lump in his throat threatened to choke him as he took in the sight around him. Nothing, no red dawn or bees, nothing could've prepared him for this.

It was a crater - a crater in the ground littered with debris and jagged stone. The remnants of a tent lay strewn in the rubble like a deflated balloon. It looked as though someone had blown it all up... it was strangely reminiscent of what Manburg had looked like once Technoblade and Wilbur were done with it, except this was on a smaller scale.

"Like I said, it's a mess," Dream muttered, suddenly behind Tubbo. Tubbo tried to speak but choked on his next words.

"I just came and found it like this, I don't know what happened." Dream's mask seemed to scan the torn-up terrain, his voice surprisingly even and composed which sharply contradicted the turmoil Tubbo was feeling. He was certain that he was going to fall apart; his knees trembled and his stomach turned as he took a shaky step forward.

"Wha- Dream, what is all this?" Tubbo whimpered as he wandered the wreckage.

"Logstedshire, or - what remains of it. Tommy did a number on it," Dream muttered, kicking up a bit of dust as he scuffed his shoes.

"Tommy?" Tubbo choked as he knelt down in the dirt and brushed bits of stone and soil off a dirtied photo - one of Tommy's photos. "Tommy did this?"

Tubbo felt his hands shake as his throat started closing.

Why? Why? What had happened!?

"Well... yeah, I think so," Dream sighed. "I mean he was the only one out here and - well he'd been talking about this. I didn't think he would do it though."

"Do what?" Tubbo cried standing up and whirling around to face Dream. "Do what!?"

Dream calmly put his hands in his cloak and sighed. He walked up to Tubbo and looked down at the boy, his expressionless smile off-putting in this desperate confusing scenario. Slowly, that mask raised and look beyond Tubbo before gesturing for the boy to look too.

Tubbo slowly turned around and allowed his gaze to drift up out of the crater.

Up, and up, and up...

All the way up to a tall tower jutting into the sky like an ugly scar against the cool gray of the rainclouds. Tubbo felt his breath freeze, his heart clench, and his stomach drop. 

What - what was the tower's purpose. Why - why was it...

Why was it so _high_. Tubbo closed his eyes and prayed that it was his imagination, hoped that it was a trick of the rain, but when he opened it again the tower was still there, looking over the destruction. It stood resolute and unyielding... a small thin little pillar into the sky that could only be served for one purpose - 

Tubbo closed his eyes and tried not to imagine - tried not to think of Tommy. Tommy with his bright eyes and stupid grin, his infectious laugh and mischevious smirk - he tried not to think of Tommy on a tall pillar looking over a crater of destruction and slowly taking a step into nothingness and -

"No... no, surely not," Tubbo's voice was weak as were his knees. Tears were filling his eyes as he looked up at the rain and the clouds and the tower.

"He kept talking about how he wanted it to be over, how he was going to put it all to an end..." Dream's voice sounded like it was from another plane. It floated around Tubbo's mind and ran through his bloodstream filling the boy with icy horror.

"No..." Tubbo whimpered taking another unsteady step forward.

No...

_no_

"I kept trying to tell him it wasn't worth it. That he shouldn't end it. I hoped I could convince him to stay - change his mind. I wasn't gone long but when I came back... It seems that Tommy made up his mind," Dream's words settled on Tubbo's shoulders like iron weights and as the green-clad man finished his explanation, Tubbo took off.

He scrambled out of the crater and raced towards that gods-forsaken pillar. His mind felt shrouded in fog and he could hardly see through his tears. When he reached the pillar of dirt and stone, his hands clamped around the amateur hand and footholds carved into it (Tommy never had been one for safety guidelines when constructing something). Tubbo's fingers dug into the foundation, pulling away pieces of wet dirt that were slopping off the cheap construction and holding them in his small hands as he screamed.

"TOMMY!" he screamed up as the rain picked up and pelted his face. The only answer to his scream was the howling wind and pouring cold rain that slammed into Tubbo's figure like needles. 

He called again and again and again. He screamed and begged and sobbed as his knees gave out from under him and he was left in front of that pillar that had been his best friend's last stand. Tears mingled with rainwater and ran Tubbo's face as he hid his face in his large sleeves and sobbed.

His sleeves no longer smelled like nectar...

"Tubbo..." a voice urged. The rain stopped pelting Tubbo's face and the boy slowly looked up to where Dream stood, his cloak raised to shield the boy from the rain.

"Dream..." Tubbo choked.

"Tubbo, we don't know if he's dead - " Dream began, his mask seemingly gentler as it looked down at the distraught boy.

"We DO!" Tubbo sobbed as his voice cracked again.

Why else would the tower be here? Why else would Logstedshire be a crater?! Why else wouldn't Tommy be here? 

Tommy...

Tommy was gone...

"What about your compass? What does that say?" Deam urged.

"The compass is BROKEN!" Tubbo screamed, his voice shattering into a wail. He viciously pulled his sleeve up exposing the bent metal and shattered glass strapped to his wrist. The scarlet arrow spun around wildly, hanging near north one moment before spinning wildly counterclockwise. It was broken...

It was broken and useless and worthless and - 

... and it was all his fault.

It was all his fault.

Tubbo wailed and hid his face in his hands again, desperately trying to wipe away the unyielding reservoir of sadness. 

It was all his fault.

He killed Tommy. He exiled Tommy. This was his fault - this was all his fault. 

_"Hey, Tubbo, we're in this together."_

All his fault.

Tommy and his bright smile and happy jokes and stupid ideas... his determined spirit and funny laugh and weird quirks and...

All his fault... It was all his fault. He had killed Tommy.

"Come on," Dream urged as he grabbed Tubbo's arm and hauled him up. Tubbo looked back up at the tower, his eyes dim as he took in that terrible structure once more before letting Dream lead him back to the nether portal.

Tubbo felt numb; like he'd been left outside for too long in the cold. He hardly noticed the difference between the chilly downpour and the broiling dry nether as they crossed through the obsidian gate. His tears stung his eyes as they continued to fall and Tubbo hardly made a few steps before he fell to his knees again.

He hadn't... he hadn't even gotten to say sorry... or goodbye... or hello, or anything that he had wanted to tell Tommy. Anything.

He hadn't visited or messed around or... or... he hadn't even seen Tommy since - 

Tubbo hiccuped and buried his face in his sleeves as sobs racked his body. All his fault, all his fault, all his fault - 

"Tubbo, I'm sorry," Dream murmured. There was a damp presence at Tubbo's side as the godling settled down beside the young president. "I really hoped you would be able to tell me he was alive."

"No," Tubbo sobbed. "No - no, I don't - I can't... I - "

"This...This isn't your fault Robi-" Dream seemed to touch Tubbo's shoulder before heavily recoiling "- Tubbo. This isn't your fault Tubbo."

"It is, It is - I exiled him and I - I - I killed him - and -" Tubbo sobbed.

"Tommy made his decisions," Dream soothed, his voice sounded strangely strained. "Tommy made poor decisions and he was punished for them. That was not your fault. You did what was right, not just for you but for the country. I was with Tommy, Tubbo, I saw what was going on with him - it wasn't something that started with you."

"It's my fault - " Tubbo choked.

"It was his choice..." Dream murmured. "You can't blame yourself for his decision."

"I - I never got to - I never got to say sorry..." Tubbo whimpered as he looked up and wiped his eyes. He looked over to Dream's mask before wiping his face and sniffling. Dream gently reached into his cloak and pulled out a strangely-shaped compass.

"I... I found this in the wreckage," Dream offered. "I think it was purposefully smashed but - but I saw him with this a few days before all of that happened."

Gingerly, Dream pressed another broken compass into Tubbo's hands...

It was Tommy's compass. Tommy's "Your Tubbo" compass. It had been smashed and dented so the arrow could only sorrowfully bump against a piece of dented metal as it tried to point at Tubbo's chest.

Tubbo choked and cradled the compass close to his heart, his knuckles turning white as he clenched the large piece of metal.

He was certain now - Tommy was gone. He leaned forward and screamed. He screamed as loud and as long as he could until the air was ripping at his throat and tearing up his voice box. 

His fault. All his fault...

"I'm sorry, Tubbo," Dream soothed, a gentle hand landing on his back. "I am."

"Why?" Tubbo pleaded. "Why? Why?"

"Why what?" 

"Why does this happen? Why to Tommy!? _Why_?" Tubbo wailed. "WHY?"

Dream let out a long sigh and began to rub circles into Tubbo's back.

"Because... bad things happen to good people. The worst of things happen to the best of people," Dream answered solemnly.

Tubbo sniffed and wiped some of his snot away with his baggy sleeves, his hand still clenched on Tommy's compass.

"Feels... feels like it only happens to me... to Tommy... to..." he broke down again and hid his face as tears ran down his face.

"That's not true," Dream denied. "It happens to all sorts of good people."

"Yeah!?" Tubbo felt rage replace his despair for a moment as he pressed the compass into his chest, gripping it so tightly he was sure it would bend. "WHERE!? SHOW ME SOMEONE ELSE WHO - WHO" Tubbo felt his throat close as the tears and despair returned. "... It feels like... It's only me... it's only Tommy... It's only us... It's only _me_ now..."

"No," Dream corrected. "There's... there's Fundy, he's had it rough - there's Niki, there's Ranboo... I know a lot of people who've suffered."

Tubbo held his head and hiccuped again.

"Actually... I knew a boy who, well you remind me of him, actually," Dream murmured.

"Yeah?" Tubbo choked, feeling self-loathing curl on his tongue like poison. "Did he kill his best friend too? Did he... did he mess up _everything_?"

Dream laughed dryly, the empty joke falling as flat as his tone. "No... but he lost everyone, a lot like you did."

Tubbo wiped his eyes and hugged himself. His lip was still trembling and there were still tears dripping down his face but some of the numbness was fading.

"Tommy may come back in another world," Dream soothed. "He may not be permanently gone. He's a strong soul, he'll wake up in some new dimension."

"B-but how will I find him? How will I apologize... how - I've ruined everything, Dream," Tubbo sobbed.

"You haven't ruined anything," Dream denied gently, pulling Tubbo into a sideways hug. "This isn't your fault."

"It is - "

"It's not," Dream stated simply. "How were you supposed to know he was suffering? You never came so you couldn't have known."

Tubbo choked as those words sunk their claws into his heart and forced him to tremble under the guilt on his shoulders. He... he had never visited... he had never... This was all his fault. He couldn't make it right anymore - he could apologize. Gods he wanted to apologize. He wanted to turn back time and run down this stupid bridge and throw himself through that violet-purple portal and into Tommy's arm. He wanted to hug Tommy. He wanted to apologize to Tommy... He wanted Tommy.

"I... I want him back," Tubbo whispered. He took off his wrist compass and gripped it in his palm.

"I know..." Dream cooed. His gloved hand reached down and gently pried Tubbo's fingers apart so that the masked man could see the compass. The green-clad man ran his thumb over the cracked glass and a small hum filled Tubbo's ears.

"You know... I could probably fix this," Dream muttered.

"What?" Tubbo choked.

"I - I don't know if it would make you feel better but I could probably fix your compass," Dream shrugged.

"N-no, Fundy... Fundy said it was beyond repair... he said - " Tubbo blubbered.

"Fundy doesn't exactly have the same resources I have," Dream scoffed as his hand hovered over the small wrist compass. "I could do it Tubbo... Then maybe you could find Tommy in another world."

Tubbo's eyes widened in realization as what little emotion was left in his chest burned with hope.

"Y-you could fix it?" Tubbo pleaded - he knew he sounded pitiful but his chest felt empty and his words echoed in his mind. Sounding pitiful was the least of his concerns as he begged the masked man. "Please - do you think I could find Tommy in another world - I could apologize... I could - "

"You'd have to give me a while," Dream soothed, gently plucking the small compass out of Tubbo's hand and taking a moment to inspect the dented metal. "But... I think it's doable."

Tubbo wiped the renegade tears and nodded. "Please... please do..."

Dream slipped the compass into his pocket and slowly began to rub Tubbo's back again.

"I'd give it time, Tubbo. You still have a country to worry about and... and Tommy, if he did come back in another world, he may not be ready to see you. He wasn't... he wasn't so fond of you in those final days. He said he hated you."

Tubbo had to pretend that those words didn't punch him in the gut, that his lip wasn't about to start trembling.

"I... understand..." Tubbo whimpered.

"Good. I'll see what I can do about this compass though... now let's get you home. You've had a rough day," Dream urged as he picked Tubbo up and led him back toward L'Manburg.

Tears continued to stream down Tubbo's face and the more he thought about it, the more helpless he felt. Tommy was gone...

Tommy was gone...

Even if he had come back in another world... that didn't change how it had ended in this one. Tommy was gone.

And - and what if Tommy never came back. What if the death was permanent - that happened sometimes. People died and were never seen again, their existence erased from the universe and their name absent for the rest of time...

What if... what if that happened to Tommy!?

"Is it okay if I leave you here?" Dream asked as they reached the L'Manburg portal. "I... I'd like to go back to Logstedshire... get some closure."

For the first time, Tubbo looked to Dream and felt himself choke up as he realized how the man must be feeling.

"You... you were hanging out with Tommy in exile... right?" Tubbo managed.

"Yeah... yeah, I... I didn't want the kid to be alone," Dream murmured, stuffing his hands in his cloak. "I... I wanted him to be punished for what he did, I hoped he would learn to... to be less destructive but I never, I never wanted him to get hurt. I guess in the end destruction was in his nature... when there was nothing left to destroy he turned to himself..."

Tubbo thought he heard the low tone of sadness in Dream's voice and with a shaky breath, he stepped forward and hugged the taller man. It seemed to take Dream by surprise as he tensed.

"It's... it's not your fault either," Tubbo whispered, burying his face in Dream's cloak.

Dream's fingerless gloved hands froze for a moment before carefully emerging from his cloak and wrapping around Tubbo.

"Thank you, Tubbo..." Dream murmured distantly.

"No... thank you Dream... You... you were there for him and - and you told me... I... thank you, Dream," Tubbo sniffed. Dream only hummed in response.

Tubbo squeezed Dream tighter, hoping to hide his tears for just a little longer. He wasn't ready to go back to L'Manburg - he wasn't ready to tell anyone - everyone. Everyone needed to know. He was the President, it was his job to tell everyone. For now, he just wanted to be a kid, a kid sobbing his eyes out because his best friend was dead because of _him_.

He never noticed the hint of gunpowder that clung to Dream's clothes like a lingering scent or the wounds wrapped in tight gauze that had been the effect of a divine being's sword, wounds that lay shrouded under that thick green cloak. Tubbo couldn't have seen the smile that had lit up Dream's features from beneath that bleached mask as he glanced at the small compass still in his hands, his gaze locked on that little red arrow that pointed him towards his quarry.

How could Tubbo have noticed?

His best friend was gone. That was all he could think about.

Tommy...

Tommy was gone...

And it was all his fault.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hahaha, I said this would take a few days and then got slapped with inspiration at 2 in the morning. NO PROMISES ABOUT THE NEXT CHAPTER, could be tomorrow, could be next week - we'll see.  
> You guys wanted to know what happened between Phil and Dream? Nope. You'll have to wait another chapter.  
> I may have put in a little easter egg of Dream's past in here. Haha.  
> P.S - I don't speak fluent Spanish so if you notice any grammatical errors - please help.


	7. Merciless Pasts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tommy's traumatized, Quackity is concerned, and there is LORE! ALL THE LORE! SO MUCH LORE!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If this is too much world-building, let me know. I'm not sure how much Lore I should mess with and I fear I may have gone too far.
> 
> lol love y'all

"Is your head throbbing?" Techno demanded, his voice falling into that cute little panicked lilt as he pampered Phil. Phil chuckled warmly and pushed those trembling hands away before gingerly brushing the bandages that covered the top of his head, wincing a bit as he felt the tender part. He was very lucky Dream's ax had only grazed his head or his brains would be strewn all over the beach instead of safely resting in his head (where he would like them to stay, thank you very much).

"Nah, Tech, I'm okay," Phil assured him as he adjusted his sitting position, wincing slightly as the wound in his side screamed in protest - there may be a broken rib somewhere in his messed-up chest.

"You want tea or something? I have healing potions too - I - I mean you gotta tell me what you need Phil so I can help - "

Phil laughed warmly and waved Techno away.

"Just grab me a quick regen, no instant health - some of these things should _probably_ heal normally," Phil winced as he tried to stretch, feeling quite a few bones pop, bones which were probably not supposed to be popping.

"You sure?" Techno's pig-like hears were pressed against his gentle face and Phil felt a bit of his chest warm as he looked into the warlord's large crimson eyes.

"Yes, Techno. Now stop worrying about me, I'm old, I'm not _dead_ ," Phil grumbled with a mirthful gleam in his eye.

Techno muttered something under his breath as he went over to a chest and rustled around in its contents, the sound of clanking bottles ringing through the house. Philza rubbed his aching arm that would probably have a wicked bruise tomorrow, his eyes wandering around Technoblade's warm cottage before finally settling on the boy in the corner of the room who seemed oh-so small at the moment.

"Tommy, you okay mate?" Phil asked gently.

The boy jumped as his eyes snapped out of the space they'd been lost in. Those grey (they should be blue - why were they so dark and distant?) stormy eyes looked over to Phil, gazing into Phil's gentle blue only for a moment before flittering to the ground as the boy muttered something unintelligible before tacking on a 'bitch' for good measure. 

Philza chuckled, keeping a wide smile as he gestured for Tommy to come closer.

"You don't have to sit over there, mate, it's nice and warm over here by the fire."

"I'm good," Tommy muttered, pulling his fur-lined cloak further around him and looking back out the window at the falling snow that was starting to build on the window frame. The boy's shoulders were tense and his knuckles were white as they gripped that light blue cape.

"I lost Dream far before I even headed this way, Tommy," Philza assured the boy gently. With a small gasp, he pushed himself to his feet - much to Techno's displeasure.

"Phil - PHIL! Sit back down!" the hybrid orders as he looked up from the chest he was in, his hands full of bottles with colorful liquids.

Phil gave him a simple dismissive signal to quiet down before slowly limping towards Tommy and staring out the window as the boy did. His eyes settled on the snowy field and the dark woods beyond that which were shrouded by the gentle falling of the light snowflakes that whipped about in the northern wind. Even with the cover of snowfall, Phil's sharp eyes instinctively picked out the shadowed figures of monsters and mutations as the beasts mulled about the night - maybe Tommy thought he saw more than zombies and skeletons in those woods.

"I led him all sorts of other directions before pearling away. I don't care how good a hunter he is, he shouldn't find us," Phil stated darkly, glaring out the window as he dared that smiley face to appear outside. Even in this state, he'd be ready for a round two.

"He... He's gonna hunt me down," Tommy murmured. "He's - I mean he's Dream that's what he does -"

"Tommy," Phil reached over and grabbed Tommy's shoulder. He hated how Tommy flinched at the touch, hated how Tommy's eyes danced in fear for a moment, how the tall boy curled up and looked so small under a simple touch...

He should've bashed Dream's head into a rock twice as hard. Gods, it had been _good_ to feel that mask crack on a stone.

"Tommy, we will not let him get you," Phil swore. "He will not touch you. If he so much as looks at you I'll... I'll - "

"We get it Phil, you'll murder yourself a smiley face. Now sit down before you go kill yourself. You fool," Techno scolded as he pushed a regeneration potion in Philza's hands and led him back to the chair by the fire.

Edward let out a content little humm as Philza settled back down in the wooden chair that creaked under his weight. The tame? enderman was so close to Phil he could touch it, small little purple particles dancing around its tall dark frame. For a moment Philza thought of Ranboo - was he okay? Would Dream go after him next... he needed to send a message to Ranboo, tell him what had happened, and warn him about the godling who would doubtlessly be on a rampage after losing Tommy.

Speaking of - Tommy still hadn't moved from the window, he stood vigilant by the glass, holding that cloak around him like an embrace as he likely prepared himself for Dream's arrival.

The thought made Philza clench his fist.

"Drink up old man, you're wounds aren't gonna heal themselves - well actually they will, but - but it will take a lot longer than I'm willing to sit here for, Phil." Techno urged as he sat down on a chest beside Phil.

Philza allowed himself a small smile as he uncorked the glass bottle and downed the bright pink liquid. The thick substance coated the roof of his mouth as it left the aftertaste of something reminiscent of burnt marshmallows - ghast tear taste likely. As soon as the warm concoction slid down his throat, coating it with its thick syrupy texture, Philza felt his body thrum with relief. Bones slowly began shifting in place and popping back into their sockets as the wounds on Phil's skin began stitching together. A burst of energy filled Phil's chest making him smile and flex his fingers.

Yeah - the high that came with regeneration was one of the best. He'd crash and burn in an hour or so though.

"You sure there's nothing else serious?" Techno muttered as he began reaching out, pressing gently against Phil's side and feeling what ribs were out of place. Phil pushed those hands away again and got to his feet, stretching a bit and sighing in relief as some of the stiffness disappeared.

"Ohh, that feels good," Philza breathed.

"Yeah - that's great Phil, sit back down," Techno ordered. Philza waved him off.

"I gonna go patrol real fast," Phil smiled.

"NO! No, you're not - are you _crazy_!?" Techno cried. "I'll patrol, you stay here and don't. move."

"Tech, I can patrol-" Phil began with a chuckle, but Techno had already adorned his furry cloak and brandished his dark sword.

"Stay," Techno ordered dangerously. Phil gently reached out and put a soothing hand on Techno's shoulder feeling that tension that always lay simmering on the hyrbid's shoulders. The tall man towered over him by a foot at least and at the moment Techno was glaring at Phil who was not intimidated in the slightest. He closed his eyes and reached out with his consciousness, his fingers thrumming with their familiar promise of power as that power seeped into Techno's being before hesitating and waiting for permission. It was always a question, should Techno not want this contact Phil would back down, but Techno (despite everything) was so desperate for connection that he never denied Phil or his abilities.

In a moment, Phil's head was filled with a familiar cacophony of maddening voices - Techno's "chatter" as the hybrid had deemed them.

They were busy, it seemed, and Phil smiled to hear a few of them cheering for him and chanting to protect Tommy. The normal few screamed to be fed with blood, but they were distant it seemed. Good, Techno must've been feeding them with monster blood to keep them so tame. Gently he removed his hand and watched Techno relax as the voices likely dampened in his own head for a moment.

It was always fulfilling for Phil to remember that his interface abilities could offer Techno a few minutes of peace. That Phil could do some good. By connecting with the voices, he turned their attention away from the hybrid and filled Philza's head instead. They were calling now, laughing and chanting their unintelligible words as they bounced around Phil's head.

"Fine, I'll stay here. You be safe," Phil smiled warmly.

Techno's smile was soft as the man likely tried to say thank you but rested only on smiling, his tusks hardly larger than canines as they lit up in a toothy smile, probably enjoying the silence in his head. The tall warlord trudged out of the house, his heavy boots clunking down the front steps before fading into the distance.

Phil walked up to the window, choosing to ignore the voices that were starting to realize they weren't in Techno's head anymore and so were rebelling angrily and pounding on Phil's skull.

How Techno put up with this all the time was... unfathomable. It felt like Phil's brain was trying to pull itself apart.

Phil shook his head and forced himself to focus. Tommy - he needed to focus on Tommy.

Quite a few of the voices agreed.

Phil looked over at the boy who was watching Techno leave into the snowstorm with an unreadable expression.

"You... sure you're okay, mate?" Phil prodded.

Tommy opened his mouth to answer and then closed it. They sat in silence for a long moment while the two stared out that window. Well, Tommy stared at the snow, Philza kept glancing at Tommy, reading the pain and fear that lingered behind those dark eyes.

"I'm fine," Tommy finally managed.

Philza felt his shoulders drop a bit as he looked back out the window.

"You don't have to talk about it Tommy - but I want you to know that you're - "

"He killed Tubbo," Tommy managed, his eyes hardened as they settled on Technoblade's large figure that was nearing the distant woodline, almost completely hidden by the falling snow.

Philza looked from Techno's distant figure back to Tommy, recognizing the conflicting emotion in his eyes.

"Techno did," Philza murmured in agreement, his voice wavering with uncertainty. This wasn't exactly the conversation he had been looking to have.

"You sent me here," Tommy shook, holding himself tighter. "You sent me to Technoblade when you knew - you _knew_ that he killed Tuboo and that I hate him and - "

"And he's the only person that can stop Dream," Phil knew he shouldn't interject, knew he should let the boy vent... but the voices were upset that their master was being insulted and Phil felt his own chest seize as Tommy's tongue lashed out so hatefully at such a close friend.

Tommy flinched at the name "Dream" which made a wave of guilt wash over Phil.

"I..." Phil's words died on his lips as he looked down. Guilt, anger, and despair churning his gut as he wrestled with what he could possibly say to help... How could he fix any of this?

The voices faded away, returning to their master most likely, leaving Phil alone with his own thoughts in that cabin listening to a crackling fire and the soft breaths of a boy.

"I know you don't like him," Philza managed finally. "And... and I know I probably should've warned you about what you were walking into but -"

Phil clenched his jaw as he thought of the sick laugh emerging behind a porcelain mask that had permeated his mind just a few hours earlier. 

__

_"You can't protect him forever, Philza! You can't even protect yourself!!"_

"But Techno is our best bet at keeping Dream at bay," Philza continued. "Dream may be powerful, but he knows better than to mess with Technoblade... and I trust Techno."

"He... he killed Tubbo," Tommy whimpered. "He - he spawned withers in L'Manburg. He tried to _kill_ me!!"

"I..." Philza began to make his defense before he saw Tommy's face, then, the words died on his tongue. Tommy's eyes were filled with tears and his jaw was clenched with anger. Gently, Phil reached over and wrapped Tommy in a hug. Tommy shuddered under his touch for a moment before melting into the hug and tucking his face into Philza's shoulders. In a moment, Philza realized he was crying which only made this all feel so much worse.

"Oh, Tommy," Philza felt himself choke up.

"I'm - I'm so confused," Tommy managed, his voice muffled but the furs on Philza's shoulder. "Tubbo - Tubbo isn't my friend anymore. Techno - Techno tried to kill me but now - now he's - I'm so... and Dream - my friend... Phil, I don't know what to think. I'm all confused and shit and it hurts and I... I want it to stop, Phil."

Philza held Tommy tighter, trying to ignore his own tears slipping down his face. Too much... there was too much on this boy's shoulder. Too much. Why the fuck had he... Why had he let this happen?

Why hadn't he been there? Why hadn't he stopped it? Why had he let Tommy get this hurt? Why... why was Tommy so tall? Philza felt himself choke as he tried to calm Tommy realizing just how big the boy had gotten. So tall and grown and - and so damn broken.

"I'm sorry, Tommy," Philza breathed. "I'm so sorry."

"How do I make it stop, Phil?" Tommy pleaded, gripping Philza's cloak as he shuddered under another sob.

Phil pulled away for a moment, cupping Tommy's face and wiping away some of the tears with his thumbs. He pressed his forehead against Tommy's and took a breath.

"I don't know, Tommy... but I'm going to keep you safe. You're not going to be hurt again, not while I'm here. I promise..."

They stood there for a long moment, listening to each other breathe as the fire crackled and Edward listened to the exchange silently. Philza kept his breathing slow until Tommy's quick breath matched his own and even then they stood there... Philza didn't want to let go... Not again. 

"Phil," Tommy's voice shook after a long moment of silence. "What happened to your wings?"

Phil's eyes widened for a moment as he looked into Tommy's eyes. That was quite the change in conversation.

"My wings?" he echoed.

"You - you had 'em when... when you killed Wilbur and... and then... I was looking for them when Techno dressed your wounds and - Phil... Where are your wings?" Tommy asked.

Phil smiled and chuckled as he pushed some of Tommy's golden bangs out of the boy's face. "Not allowed to fly in this world, mate. I had to lock them away. Don't worry, it didn't hurt."

It really hadn't. Dream had muttered a few arcane words and... it almost felt like removing armor. One moment his wings had been there and the next - gone.

"Why?" Tommy shuddered. "You loved your wings."

"What?" Philza smiled incredulously.

"Wilbur... Wilbur said you loved your wings..."

Philza smiled and shrugged, "There are more important things in this world, Tommy. You, for one."

Tommy's eyes flickered with something dark. "I'm... I'm not worth your wings."

Phil would've rather had Tommy stab him in the gut than say that. Though... it would've felt about the same. 

"Tommy - Tommy don't you ever say that," Philza almost growled as he grabbed Tommy's shoulders. "You - you are worth more to me than any _fucking_ thing. You and Wilbur and Techno - you are the only things that have _ever_ mattered."

Tommy looked away, his dark eyes shadowed by his bangs. Philza almost saw Wilbur for a second as he looked up at his boy - Wilbur as he looked away from Philza with that dark expression of doubt and hopelessness. Wilbur, as he reached for the stupid button.

Philza felt his throat close as he searched for what words to say. How could he explain that Tommy was worth every fucking minute of pain? That Tommy was worth every week it took for Philza to learn to walk after his wings were gone. That Tommy was worth every minute of longing Philza felt when he looked to the sky. That nothing, _nothing_ in this world or any world would ever put Tommy above his stupid wings.

Dream could've carved them out of his back with a dull blade for all he cared, it would've still been worth it.

But Philza couldn't seem to be able to say that, so, instead, he hugged Tommy.

"You are... You are... You are worth so much more than you think," Philza managed as he tried to cradle Tommy's body in his arms. Why was he so big? Why couldn't he fit into Phil's arms? Why... why did he feel so distant when he was right here in Phil's embrace?

Tommy pulled away from Phil's touch this time and went back to the window, his eyes dark. Philza was left standing there, his hands shaking as his throat closed in on him.

What... what was he supposed to say? How could he fix this? How - 

"Techno's coming ba..." Tommy's voice died out as the boy took an unsteady step back from the window.

"What?" Philza demanded rushing over to the window as Tommy backed away slowly, the boy's eyes widening in fear as his hands shook.

Philza narrowed his eyes as his sharp sight easily picked out Techno trudging back home with someone by his side. Someone with a green hoodie and a white mask and - 

Philza wasn't quite aware he had moved until he was throwing the door open with his sword drawn and his chest tight. The wind bit his cheeks and the snow pelted his face but Philza couldn't have cared less.

"Don't you take another FUCKING STEP, Dream!" Philza shouted in rage as the duo approached Techno's front steps.

"Phil - Phil hold on!" Techno demanded. Philza hardly heard him over the blood pumping in his ears and the rage in his chest.

"Philza Minecraft, nice to finally meet you," a voice permeated through the cold, breaking through that rage like a knife through butter - but it wasn't Dream's voice. It was young in nature and very feminine. The green-cloaked figure reached up and pulled the hood back revealing a long mess of blonde hair that blew in the wind wildly. The porcelain mask on the new figure's face was smaller than Dream's oval one, showing a mischievous smile that was about as wild as the storm they were in..

"Who's this?" Philza demanded, confusion trickling into his voice.

The figure bowed dramatically before looking up, their face lit into a bright grin. "Drista, at your service, amazing and all-powerful God of chaos and mischief, and I hear you're looking to fuck with my brother."

~~~

The evening was fast approaching and Quackity hadn't stopped pacing. The rain had grown into a terrible downpour and it slammed into the roof of the community house, drowning out Quackity's steady footsteps.

The Vice President couldn't settle the anxiety building in his stomach. His skin was crawling and prickling under his suit as he thought of Tubbo all alone with that bastard. Quackity approached the doorway again, looking out the open door to the flickering purple portal that was glowing in the downpour.

Where could Dream have taken him? What on earth could be taking them this fucking long!? 

What the hell was Dream up to?

"Are- are you okay, Quackity?" a gentle voice asked nearly making Quackity jump out of his skin. His skin did contort for a moment as it instinctively tried to shift into a better form but Quackity was able to stop it before he shifted into something uncouth.

It was Ranboo, just Ranboo. The tall half-breed stood in the community house covered head to toe in armor with a small little umbrella in his hand that was drenched. Had he,... Did he really just walk here in the rain?

Ranboo hated the rain.

"Jesus, don't do that," Quackity breathed as he held his chest. For such a big guy the half-enderman was freakily quiet.

"Sorry," Ranboo shrunk a bit as he looked to the floor. "But... but you've been here a while."

"Yeah, I'm fine, I'm just waiting for Tubbo," Quackity settled himself and crossed his arms, looking back to the open door.

"Yeah... yeah, I saw him go off with Dream while I was - while I was with Fundy and Niki," Ranboo murmured, closing the umbrella before walking up beside Quackity to gaze out the door. "What... what happened?"

"How the hell am I supposed to know - the guy came up and said he needed to talk to Tubbo! I'm just left out of everything that seems to happen between our country and that fucking green man."

Ranboo flinched at Quackity's harsh tone instilling a small wince in Quackity as guilt flooded his chest.

"Sorry," Ranboo murmured, fiddling with his claws.

"It... it isn't your fault," Quackity sighed, wishing he could kick himself. "I'm... _Lo siento_ , this isn't... there's nothing you've done wrong. I just - " he let out a long sigh, "- I don't like him. I don't like that masked bastard near L'Manburg, I don't like him near Tubbo, and I don't like how Tubbo lets him get away with murder."

"I - I don't think Tubbo means to let him get away with anything," Ranboo murmured.

Quackity could've laughed at that. No, no Tubbo didn't mean for any of this shit to happen and yet it had. Tommy had been exiled placing L'Manburg under Dream's thumb. Technoblade was still on the loose and they were housing the pig's ally down their _own fucking street_. No, no, none of this was Tubbo's fault - but it sure as hell needed to get fixed and it wasn't going to be fixed with the kid bending backward to try and appeal to the masked bastard so they weren't all murdered in their beds by that psyco.

"I - I've... met quite a few bastards who meant to hurt this country. No, I don't think Tubbo's one, but I do think he's... enabling..." Quackity sighed. "This is our country and it shouldn't bend its knee to - to bastards in smiley masks.

Ranboo shifted paw to paw nervously before fearfully looking over to Quackity - the kid almost never looked to his face so Quackity made sure to avoid eye contact to not ruin the moment.

"Tubbo chose his country once... that's why he exiled Tommy... He should've - we should be choosing people - not country. I think - I think Tubbo's trying too hard to chose his country..."

"No, he's just... he's a kid," Quackity sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "He's a kid who's spine is... let's admit it, he has spineless moments - "

"I think he's very brave," Ranboo interrupted. "I think... I think he's much braver than I could ever be."

"Yeah, well, that ain't saying much is it, Ranboo?" Quackity chuckled. Ranboo smiled and looked away allowing Quackity to turn and look the kid over. He had a gentle smile as he stared down at his fidgeting hands.

"That's true," Ranboo laughed, maybe with a little bit of pain hiding behind that smile. Quackity smiled and laughed along. 

"We choose L'Maburg because it's our home," Quackity continued. He put a hand on his chest and furrowed his brow as he thought of all the fucking pain they'd gone through to get this land - get this freedom. "This - our country is the only place we've ever been free. It's our only chance to escape all this bullshit - Dream and Techno and all that. It's our home. We've bled for this land."

"You bled for the people," Ranboo denied.

"No," Quackity growled as he clenched his fist. For a moment he thought he could smell alcohol on his breath and felt a warm hand in his own as if someone was trying to lead him away - in a moment it was gone leaving Quackity shaking, his breaths heavy as his lips tingled. "If I bled for people I'd be on the wrong fucking side all the time. I fought for my home. I fought to have a place to belong. That's what I wanted. That's what I - what all of us, that's what we fought and died for."

Ranboo's tail swished uncertainly behind him.

"But... don't you think people are more important?" Ranboo asked uncertainly. Quackity threw him a look as he shook his head. Honestly, this kid and his 'people' thing. Of course Quackity fucking cared about people - he... he'd cared about a lot of people. But caring about people was useless if you couldn't...

If you couldn't keep them safe. If you couldn't support them. That's why they needed L'Manburg, that's why they needed a government, that's why they had to get rid of all those in power...

That's what Quackity fought for.

"People disappoint you... and hurt you," Quackity chuckled. "But those few that I care for, Ranboo. Those few like Tubbo, Fundy, and you... I'll fight to make sure we all have a safe place to sleep. I'll fight to keep us free from bullshit tyrants and abuse. I'll fight for that. To kick those bastards above us in the balls."

Ranboo shifted uncertainly, opening his mouth to continue but never got the chance as a flash of purple broke through the rain turning both of their attentions towards the nether portal where a single figure had emerged.

"Tubbo?" Quackity called running out in the rain to the boy. Ranboo brought his umbrella back out and jogged after him, being careful to avoid the puddles forming on the pathway.

The boy looked frightfully small in the rain, his green shirt drenched beyond belief much like his hair that was plastered across his brow. His entire frontside was covered with dirt like he had taken a nasty slide in a puddle of mud which made Quackity's blood burn.

What the hell had happened?

"Tubbo? What happened?" Ranboo asked, his voice barely breaking through the sound of rain splattering on the black stone beneath their feet.

Tubbo took a deep breath and stood up a bit taller. He looked from Quackity to Ranboo and opened his mouth...

... and then completely broke down into sobs.

"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! _¡Qué pasó!?¡Qué pasó!_?" Quackity demanded as he quickly came over and put an arm around the boy, leading him down the steps towards the community house and out of the rain.

Tubbo was choking and muttering all sorts of things that Quackity couldn't make out in the torrent of rain. To try and soothe him Quackity pulled the boy closer and tried to shield him from the rain with his jacket.

Suddenly, the rain was blocked out by Ranboo's umbrella as the half-breed held the thing over them, his armor letting out a symphony of clinks as heavy raindrops fell on the dark metal. Quackity gave him a thankful look, Ranboo only nodded in response, wincing as the raindrops touched his exposed skin before setting his attention back to Tubbo.

They managed to get him into the community house, Ranboo quickly closing the door behind them, muffling out the sound of rain and making Tubbo's strangled sobs painfully clear.

"Tubbo?" Ranboo asked fearfully as the young president broke away, rubbing his eyes and apologizing.

"Tubbo, what the fuck happened? Where's Dream?" Quackity demanded chasing after the boy and grabbing his arms. "What did he do!?"

"He - he didn't - that's not - I'm sorry," Tubbo whimpered.

"Tubbo, I swear I'll kill him," Quackity growled.

"Tommy's DEAD!" Tubbo sobbed finally.

The silence that came after that exclamation could've strangled Quackity. The storm outside seemed to rage a little louder, the raindrops slamming into the roof.

"What?" Ranboo sounded so very small with that question.

"What did Dream do?" Quackity demanded.

"Nothing - nothing," Tubbo sobbed. "He wanted to see if we could find him - He wanted me to help him find Tommy - "

"Did you?" Quackity pressed.

"No! He - he killed - Tommy... Tommy killed himself," as those words left Tubbo's lips the boy trembled and Quackity had enough sense to catch the boy as the little guy fell to his knees.

Quackity felt his own gut plunge into his feet as he dropped to his knees with the boy.

Tubbo wrapped his arms around Quackity and sobbed into his rain-drenched jacket. Quackity's hands shook as he hugged the kid back.

"What? Are - are you sure?" Quackity murmured.

"It's all my fault," Tubbo sobs were muffled but his words cut a hole right through Quackity's heart.

"No, no Tubbo - "

"It is!" Tubbo cried. "You and Dream can say otherwise but it's my fault - I did it! I exiled Tommy - "

"Dream ordered you to - you didn't have much of a choice!" Quackity tried to defend... Though... Tubbo had held a choice. They could've fought Dream - they could've kept Tommy safe...

"It's my fault," Tubbo whimpered.

No. NO. Quackity forced himself to swallow his own harsh tongue and tried to assure Tubbo further. He was just a kid. Just a fucking kid. He shouldn't... he shouldn't be suffering through this.

"It's not your fault, _pequeña abeja_ , you... you didn't do this."

"I did," Tubbo argued weakly, pulling away from Quackity and tearfully looking down at a large compass in his hands.

"That's Tommy's compass," Ranboo's voice rasped. Quackity looked up at the other individual in the room and found the half-breed flickering as purple particles danced around him.

Tubbo nodded, tears streaming down his face. "Tommy's dead... Tommy's gone."

"No... no, no," Ranboo denied. "No, that can't be - that can't be - it can't."

Tubbo only sobbed harder forcing Quackity to gently rub the kid's back. Ranboo seemed to debate something before he rushed for the door.

"Where are you going!?" Quackity demanded, hesitating before leaving Tubbo behind (for only a moment, he swore).

"I... I gotta go... I can't... Phil... It can't be," Ranboo rambled as he left the community house, his umbrella up once more. Quackity pursued, grabbing the half-breed's shoulder and whirling him back around to face him.

"What does Phil have to do with this!? Where are you going!? Tubbo needs us!" Quackity felt anger in his head and anguish in his chest.

Tommy? Tommy was dead... Tommy, the kid who had nicknamed him Big Q and laughed about fighting god and - 

"It can't be. I can't... I need to check something," Ranboo managed before pulling away and rushing towards the portal.

Quackity felt like he needed to follow... like he should go make sure the news was real - that it was true. That Tommy was - 

Tubbo... Tubbo needed help. Quackity forced himself to turn away and rush back to the community house. Tubbo needed him...

Gods was it true?

Was Tommy gone?

~~~

"DRISTA!" Tommy had screamed in disbelief when the girl entered the cottage.

"'Sup bitch," Drista greeted with a cheeky nod.

"Bitch yourself," Tommy retorted.

Well... they were definitely on the same wavelength, Phil noted with a reserved smile. The two had gone at each other with eager banter and familiar energy that made something in Phil's chest warm. Tommy seemed... brighter. Drista's blatant antagonizing and eager lust for chaos seemed to click perfectly well with Tommy's older self that lay hidden under layers of fear and trauma.

"So you finally got off that beach, huh?" Drista jeered as she pat Tommy's head. "Good on you, took you long enough."

"Fuck off," Tommy cried as he pushed her hands away. "Why the hell are you here!?"

"Cause," Drista shrugged. "I wanna be."

"Oh you must think you're such a big shot - " Tommy began to mock.

"And you should've seen Philza throw my bro against a rock - it was funny," Drista snickered. "So I had to come check it out."

Tommy's spirit seemed to flicker at the mention of the masked man.

"Does - does he know you're here?" Tommy murmured.

"HA! No." Drista began going through Techno's chest which made the pig hybrid sigh. "Technoblade... do you still have the special rock?" she asked.

Techno let out another long-suffering sigh, Phil only grinned.

"Yes..." Techno sighed.

"Haha," Drista cheered. "Keep it on you, will you?"

Techno only huffed in response.

"Anyway~ What have you guys been up to?" Drista asked.

The night continued on as such. Drista causing a healthy amount of discourse and seemingly brightening Tommy's spirit as he was given a friend - or... god-friend? Philza was quite confused by the whole thing. They talked and joked and argued until Drista was rolling in laughter and Tommy was yawning through his heated insults.

It was about at that point that Philza ordered Tommy to bed (Gods it was reminiscent of when he had ordered Wilbur to bed after too many late nights). Tommy had objected and argued, stuck his tongue out at one point, but eventually stomped his way up to bed where he yelled down that he was a perfectly grown adult who could decide when he was or was not tired. 

The whole interaction left Philza grinning. 

There was the Tommy he knew. The Tommy who argued and fought over everything. It was refreshing to hear the boy in such high spirits.

He sat in his chair, his hands full of tea (Techno swore by this leaf juice), listening to the upstairs until Tommy was quiet for a while. The boy could ever only really be quiet if he was dead or sleeping (Phil assumed sleeping but he sent Techno to check anyway - why, _why_ was Techno looking at him like that?).

"You're helpless, Phil," Techno laughed quietly as he poked his head up the ladder to check on the boy. He came down and looked to Philza with a smile. "He's asleep... and, you know, still breathing."

Phil smiled and took a sip of his tea before looking over to Drista who was perched on a chest, staring right at Edward who surprisingly didn't seem the least bit offended by direct eye-contact.

"So, Drista - " Techno began.

"Shh," Drista ordered, holding up a finger. "I'm in a very serious staring contest."

To that, Phil laughed under his breath. "You know they don't have eyelids, right mate?"

"Shhh, neither do I but you don't see him backing down!" Drista retorted keeping her mask completely steady as her mouth curled into a serious frown.

Techno watched the interaction for a few seconds before sighing and running a hand through his hair.

"Drista, what are you doing here? I - I mean it's great and all and it's not like I really don't want you here in my house going through my things and, you know, messing with my roommate Edward, but I'm pretty sure you didn't just come here to mess with Tommy and bother me," Techno sighed.

"Did the voices tell you that?" Drista taunted, not tearing her gaze away from Edward.

Techno tensed on instinct causing Phil to do the same.

"Calm down, kidding, jeez, so... what's the word - aggressive," Drista sighed.

Edward seemed to have sensed Techno's unease as the Enderman looked back to the fire causing Drista to fist bump the air.

"YES! I AM AN ALPHA MALE!" Drista announced causing her to be hushed by both Phil and Techno. Honestly - they'd just gotten Tommy to sleep.

"Right, right, my bad," Drista murmured sheepishly looking at the ceiling. "He probably needs his sleep - whoops."

"Yeah," Philza nodded incredulously.

"Drista, what are you doing here?" Techno demanded. "You - you told me you wanted to help us stop Dream but - but I'm not getting a, you know, a very helpful vibe right now."

Drista turned towards Techno and lounged on the chest, a wry smile on her face.

"Yeah, I want to help you guys stop Dream," Drista smirked.

"Why?" Philza asked coldly. He hadn't meant it to come out so harshly but he couldn't trust this chaotic god further than he could throw her and her relationship with Dream didn't exactly make her the most "accountable" person. It was a miracle they'd let her in the house at all.

"Why? Cause he's... well because he's being stupid," Drista moaned, scratching her head and messing up her long golden locks.

"Stupid," Philza echoed.

"Like you wouldn't believe," Drista sighed, dropping her head.

"So, what? You're game for us murdering him?" Techno asked, crossing his arms and tilting his head. He never had been a subtle one - always straight to murder (this time, however, Philza agreed).

"I mean, sure I guess but that's not gonna do a lot," Drista shrugged. "I came to you guys because I need some help."

"Help how?" Philza asked, narrowing his eyes.

Drista sighed as she sat up again, her small mask staring right at Philza as her usual smile melted into something more serious.

"Dream's been corrupted," she murmured darkly. There was no response to that. Techno didn't move an inch nor did Phil. The storm outside continued to rage and the fire in the fireplace crackled but the room seemed unnaturally quiet after those words.

Philza looked into his cup of tea as he thought of the repercussions that those words stood for.

He was... He wasn't exactly surprised. Dream had been a little off as of recently - but corruption? Surely the godling hadn't broken much of his oath that he was in such peril. Did Philza care, honestly? No. In fact, it felt rather nice to know the bastard had ticked off the universe.

Techno, on the other hand, looked greatly disturbed.

"How... Well that's unfortunate," the pig hybrid covered up his expression quick but it had caught Philza's eyes. Techno seemed uneasy.

Drista hummed in agreement with Techno.

"It's not unfortunate, though, it's stupid," Drista sighed. "He's making the same mistakes he made last time."

"What happened last time?" Philza asked.

Drista's lips curled into a smile as her mask turned to look at Techno. There was something about that grin that gave Philza feel like he had a rock in his gut.

"Techno remembers," she snickered.

Techno didn't confirm or deny it. He only crossed his arms and looked into the fire, his blood-red eyes seemingly flickering with memories.

"What does she mean, mate?" Philza asked.

He was met with silence for a long moment before Techno slowly opened his mouth and spoke.

"You remember the time... You remember when I got corrupted," Techno asked gently. "And.. and how I had to go fix that, Phil? You remember that?"

Philza's throat went dry.

  


_Battlefields of corpses and carnage. Blood in the air the smell hovered above the crimson ground much like the vultures and ravens. Philza's throat was raspy and desperate as he screamed Techno's name, his eyes scanning every corpse in terror as he waited to stumble upon the body of the teenager. The body of that poor boy who couldn't have survived this - no matter how gifted he was._

  


"Yeah... yeah, I remember," Philza managed.

"That's... that's when I met Dream," Techno muttered, his fingers digging into his arm.

Drista began to swing her legs patiently as Techno told his story, Philza leaned into every word.

"He was... vengeful. He wanted to go kill... everything. Get vengeance for some family of his or something - I can't - I mean you gotta understand I wasn't exactly cognitive during all that and my memory is a bit - you know, it's a little fuzzy."

Philza did remember. He did understand, on the surface level. Technoblade had sworn an oath (be it one he didn't have a choice in or not) to remain victorious and feed the Blood God and when he broke that oath he had... he had lost himself. Not only that, but Phil had lost him - only for a moment, but a moment that had cost a world all of its inhabitants.

  


_Blood and carnage. Philza finally found him amongst the thick of it all. Techno had fallen where he had fought, the boy's chest slowly rising and falling marking him the only survivor - one who had fallen to exhaustion and not a cold blade._

_"TECHNO!" he had screamed in - shock? had it been shock... or horror?_

  


Drista hummed in approval. "Yeah... Dream was... pretty angry."

"Wait - wait," Philza felt his throat grow tight. He could smell decomposing flesh and the acrid stench of blood as the memories played out before him. "You... you were with another godling at that... that massacre?"

Philza racked his brain to try and remember the other corpses he had seen but they had all faded to time - only Techno's injured body stayed clear in his mind's eye.

"Yeah, you should've seen it Phil, pure chaos," Drista sighed with a smile on her face. "They were terrifying - the two of them. Never saw Dream act like that... he was... efficient? I dunno, I didn't watch long, it wasn't my kind of chaos - but it was his."

"I - I don't understand, Techno why didn't you tell me?" Phil demanded.

"Tell you what, Phil?" Techno asked simply. "That I purged an entire world for the hell of it, alongside another guy who had the same messed up issues as I did, I mean - I'm not sure exactly how that's supposed to come up in conversation?"

"That Dream left you there on that fucking battlefield to die!" Philza cried standing up. 

  


_Blood, so much blood. Philza had stemmed most of the bleeding thankfully but there was... there was so much. He gingerly picked up the teenager, his breaths short as he realized how light the child could be. How... how could this boy do so much damage?_

_The voices were trapped in Phil's head now, they were screaming in glee and joy - finally satisfied that the boy had given in - that they were fed. Phil clenched his jaw as he cradled the boy's head, cursing out the voices as they celebrated this sick victory._

_"I did it... I did it... they're quiet now," Techno whimpered, the smile on his face disappearing, his eyes squeezed shut in confusion._

_"I have em', Tech. I have the voices. You're okay," Philza pleaded as his mind flashed with all the ways they could escape this world._

_"No - no, it's fine Phil. I did it, they're happy now. I can - I can handle em'," Techno rasped._

_No. Phil held Techno closer and cursed himself. The corruption had acted up so much faster than he expected... Phil hadn't even had a chance to try and help - this was his fault in a way... Gods, everything was his fault._

_"I'm sorry - I " he began._

_"I fixed it, Phil... No more corruption. I kept my oath," Techno sounded so relieved as he pressed his face into Phil's chest. "They aren't angry... I won't die... Technoblade never dies... I fed them... they're happy. Blood for the Blood God. They're happy..."_

  


"He didn't," Techno denied gently. Gods he was so much bigger now, basically towering in the room as he stared into the fire. Phil pressed his fist against his mouth as he realized just how much all of the boys had grown. "Dream didn't leave me - he died first."

Phil glanced at Drista for affirmation. Her smile was gone and in its place was a hard frown.

"Really?" Philza asked.

"Went and died after we won," Techno murmured. "Called it justice or something like that."

"Pfft," Drista's laugh was sharp, far too sharp to actually hold mirth. It was spiteful. "Justice. What bullshit. It was self-destruction. That's - that's what he does, you know - "

The girl stood up and began pacing the perimeter of the room, gesticulating wildly as she vented, her mask tilted towards the ground.

"He - Well his oath is so fucking stupid in the first place so he just always finds a way to break it. He breaks it and the corruption sets in - and the only way he can fix it is by making up for his broken promise and start following the rules again, right? Well by the time the corruption sets in he's already stripping his humanity away like it's - ugh, I can't stand him when he gets like this. It's just a cycle of destruction and once he has nothing left to destroy, he's just gonna turn to himself," Drista sighed.

"No offense to you, mate, but I wouldn't mind Dream falling on his own sword," Philza stated with a sharp bite.

"Well, neither would I if he didn't do it every hundred years or so. Like, the guy's got to learn eventually right!? But nooo, he just goes and gets attached to some stupid human who leaves or perma-dies or something like that and then he goes ballistic, dies, and then respawns and mopes for years. _Years_ guys. He's annoying," Drista sighed.

"So... what, you want us to give him therapy?" Techno asked dryly.

"No," Dirsta chirped. "But you gotta keep him from winning this time."

She smirked and held up a finger. "This time, guys."

"What do you mean?" Techno asked.

"Well, I know a bit about my bro, and he's not going to even think about doing anything really stupid until he wins - So, you guys gotta keep him busy before he gets his way. I think you can do that," Drista smirked.

"You know his game plan - cause that would be pretty helpful," Techno muttered.

"Not detail, but I know he's trying to get some, I don't know: peace - in some twisted and weird way," Drista sighed.

"Peace," Phil scoffed. All of Tommy's abuse was for _peace_? Wilbur's madness was for _peace_? All this suffering for _peace_!? Bullshit.

"Look, I didn't say it's the type of peace you'd want," Drista defended.

"What's in it for you?" Phil asked darkly. "All this? Why try and intervene?"

Drista's smirk grew wider as her fingers brushed over her porcelain mask.

"I... hmm, well I get to mess with Dream and teach him a lesson," she chuckled. "It's about time the guy got knocked down."

"He's still your brother," Philza muttered.

"And Tommy's not really your son, but... uhh, didn't stop you," Drista smirked.

"So what? We just keep Dream busy?" Techno asked uncertainly. "Cause - I'm kinda retired and - and you know going from peaceful retired Techno to 'I'm taking on Dream' are two opposite sides of this spectrum."

"Just keep Tommy safe," Drista shrugged. "Don't know why, but Dream's dying to get him back."

"Why?" Phil gritted.

"I just said I don't know," Drista deadpanned. "I mean, I can try and find out but I probably shouldn't help you guys out too much because Dream's gonna be ticked at me in the next few hours."

"What did you do?" Techno asked knowingly.

Drista smirked and stuffed her hands in her hoodie pockets.

"You could say I... I'm planning on 'relocating' a few of his things. Ya know, for fun," she shrugged.

"What sort of things?" Philza asked. She was being cryptic and that was never a good sign. In response, Drista took a few steps towards Philza, staring down at the injured being with a smile that Philza really didn't quite appreciate.

"Like these," she smirked as she reached up and pat Philza's shoulder.

GODS - 

The pain was immediate and shocked Phil so terrible he was given no time to even curse. Philza hissed in pain as he gripped the chair handles. Somewhere in the distance, he heard Techno crying his name and Drista's giggling but all sounds and sensations melted away in those few seconds as his back throbbed and pulsed with a strange weight. All he could feel was the burning sensation in his back as something burst through his skin and pressed against his shirt. Soft feathers brushed against his tender skin like gentle touches, strong muscles pressed through thick wool, breaking seams and burst through layers of clothing until Philza was panting in relief and leaning back in his chair.

It was over - it was over... it was...

Techno was staring at him in shock. Those bright red eyes were full of familiar awe and something soft that Philza hadn't really seen in the warlord since he was a boy.

Something in Phil's brain knew what had happened, it knew what the weight on his back was and the gentle caresses that brushed against his skin. Still, he... he had to check.

He slowly looked behind him and felt his throat close in a choke of awe and... euphoria.

Wings... his wings.

There were large and grand, spreading out behind him like an aura of grey feathers and rustling plumage.

Philza felt his eyes grow warm... he couldn't cry, he wouldn't cry. Even as his hands drifted over to brush the feathers, run those soft quills through his callused hands, he knew he shouldn't cry.

But... but they were his wings...

"Phil..." Techno murmured. Phil realized he had tuned the world out and looked back to the hybrid, at a loss for words.

It was then he realized that Drista was gone. She seemed to just have vanished.

"Where... where's Drista?" Philza asked, his throat tight.

Techno seemed to come to the same realization as the hybrid immediately scanned the cottage in shock.

"I... I don't know..." Techno managed.

Philza forced himself to stand, stumbling now under the unfamiliar weight that clung to his back. He couldn't help but smile.

"Phil... your wings," Techno murmured, his hands reaching out to brush the feathers before the hybrid seemed to realize what he was doing and quickly retracted his hand. Philza smiled as he took Techno's hand and led it back to those feathers.

Techno always had loved his wings. As the boy's fingers sorted through Phil's plumage Phil smiled to see the familiar trance fall over Techno's face as he took in the texture. Even as a boy Techno had always climbed up and set to gently sorting through his feathers - even helping Phil preen them as he got older.

"Yeah... mate," Phil laughed through his cracking voice. "I... I got 'em back."

Techno seemed to come to his senses and quickly pulled his hand away from Phil's wing, stuffing his fingers in his cloak and looking around the cottage, those red eyes falling on a note left on the floor.

Phil saw it too and he would've bent over to grab it if he wasn't so worried about falling over due to the new weight he'd been gifted, honestly he felt like he was standing for the first time all over again. Techno grabbed the small note as he crouched down and gave it a quick read, his face growing tense as he took it in.

"What is it?" Phil asked, the smile on his face almost melted away (but not fully because he had his wings back. They were back! Gods it had been a while since he felt this good.)

Slowly, Techno handed it over for Philza to read.

_Thought you'd like these. Don't let my bro know. He doesn't like rule-breakers._

_If you get caught, he'll remove them again_

_and it won't be gentle_

_Good luck!_

_(;_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I oversaturate this with lore?... I fear I may have - Sorry!!  
> I know it's a little confusing so I'll explain it real quick (but it will be explained in future chapters)  
> Godlings aren't actual gods - more like humans infused with god-like capabilities because they made an oath to a higher power.  
> For example:  
> Techno was forced into an oath as a child. The oath forced him to live a violent life where he was always victorious. Should he ever lose to someone or choose peace, the god-like powers within him would revolt (corrupting him) and either FORCE him to kill (hence the massacre mentioned here) or would force him to destroy himself. Make a bit more sense? Sorry, it's confusing!! Ma bad. Hope you still liked it!


	8. Confidential Protection

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dream is hunting, Tommy panics, Techno is bad at emotions, and Philza makes promises that he might not be able to keep - whoops

Dream had lived better days. He had been given better luck. At the moment, however, it seemed the universe was set to work against him.

That was fine - it was the recent usual, but it was still somewhat annoying.

The compass in his hands had grown warm despite the raging ice storm. The red arrow still swung around uselessly, only hesitating northward for a few moments. Those moments were enough for Dream who had spent lives learning that it was the small movements that mattered. The enchantment was damaged, not broken, something in it still worked - and that hesitation in the compass' needlepoint was all he needed.

His boots fell lightly on the snow, leaving nearly no footprints as he crept along the forest, his eyes scanning for fallen trees or disturbed snow. Anything truly helpful would be blotted out by the snow that was streaming down from the sky and whirling around the angered northern wind, but there was still evidence that a human had been near:

A broken branch snapped clean off a tree led Dream to the frozen corpse of a spider left still in the snow at the bottom of a steep bank. Someone had been through here - and Dream would bet from the erratic slashes that covered the arachnid's body that whoever had struggled against it either was terrible at swords play, or were frantic - Tommy was average with a sword, but his emotions were a very large player in his fighting style. All recent events considered, the boy should be frantic.

Dream hummed as he reached to the corpse and pried one of the spider's undamaged eyes out of its frosty face, holding the scarlet orb in his hand thoughtfully before storing it in his ingredients pound that hung on his belt.

Damage potions could be useful soon.

The trail ended shortly after that as the wind picked up force, leaving Dream blind in a whiteout with only the damaged compass in his hands to guide him. Pulling his hood further over his head he was thankful for his mask that shielded his face from the cold bite of the north. He reached into his cloak, his fingers curling around one of the many cool ender pearls he had stowed away. 

A blind throw later he found himself nearly colliding with a tree as the purple particles drifted around him. As he studied the particles, his mind caught on to one of his many fleeting thoughts. Ah yes, he'd have to go pay a trip to Ranboo later. He waved the particles away from his mask and took refuge under the spruce branches as he looked to the compass.

It was spinning wildly now, either bothered by the cold or off-set by that last teleportation. Dream sighed and shook it, listening to the mechanism rattle around in its dented metal casing that was wanting in sturdiness. 

He waited for another few minutes until the compass calmed down momentarily and kept its arrow pointed northward for a brief moment.

Always northward - always _north_.

Dream hissed as he gripped the compass until his knuckles were as white as the snow around him. There was no guarantee the compass was even working. It had been pointing northward for the past few hours and while the remnants and clues of humanity lay scattered around him, there was no guarantee that it was indeed Tommy.

Tommy...

Dream clenched his jaw as he readied another pearl to throw through the storm.

It had been going fine - perfect, he dare say. Tommy had been so - so _good_ recently. He'd been happy and passive and - 

Philza.

Dream's head ached momentarily at the thought of the man. There was the unsavory memory of having his legs taken out from under him and his face slammed into a rock, cracking his old mask apart like it had been china, the remnants digging into his skin and - that had been a lucky blow. Luck, nothing more. Philza had only gotten lucky.

Dream's fingers twitched as he longed to reach for his sword. Anger pulsed in his head, an anger he forced back down.

It had been emotion that had cost him Tommy, emotion that had let Phil scrape by with his life in that fight, emotion that kept his chest twisting like a dying animal caught in a trap.

If it continued... if he kept fumbling like this, he would have no choice but to - 

Light; there was light. Dream had just teleported away with his pearl and found himself squinting through the storm at a flicker of light far in the distance. 

He tried to swallow the burst of eagerness that overtook his being.

If Tommy was out here - he'd need a fire to survive and the fact that the boy wasn't dead (Dream knew he wasn't dead - he would know if the boy died) meant that he had to have found shelter somewhere. 

Unless Tommy hadn't gone north at all and the compass was leading Dream awry. The thought brought another bout of anger to Dream's mind that was quickly overshadowed by the eagerness to seek out the light. If it was Tommy, Dream could easily coax him out of this storm - anything would be more tempting than this frozen hell that promised nothing but frostbite and hypothermia.

Maybe if he was lucky he'd find Tommy half-dead and could take him home without a fight.

He trudged through the thick snow, hesitating as he came closer. The light was too bright, too structured. A fire would be flickering and dancing with the wind, disappearing from sight like a blinking light in this blizzard. The light Dream regarded with cold realization was warm and constant - a house, a structure.

Who lived this far out here? Who - 

Technoblade.

Dream could feel his presence from where he stood; that uneasy prickling that went up his spine, speaking of how his rival was close. The warlord had mentioned retiring up North - but really, here? Though, it made some semblance of sense - Techno had always felt at home in the cold. Every time the two of them had wandered into a frozen landscape, back in those glory days, there'd been something reminiscent in the pig's gaze. Dream knew the look. 

Dream felt his posture loosen as he sighed again, disappointment eating away at any energy he'd felt boosted by. Anger set in, gnawing on his nerves and pounding in his head as he looked at the compass again, throwing yet another pearl northward.

Techno was a plan B - if Dream couldn't find Tommy then he'd have to get to the boy through Philza... And if anyone knew where the clipped bird was, it would be Technoblade.

But... would Techno... No, no he'd have to play it cleverly. If Phil had been in contact with Techno then the whole conversation would be useless - Techno would just kill him where he stood for what he'd done to Phil (though Phil should count himself lucky that an ax blade to the head and arm were all he was afflicted with). Technoblade was usually reasonable and easy to diffuse - except when it came to Phil, then the hybrid gave into his emotions: it made him vulnerable and _extremely dangerous_. An uncontrollable Technoblade spelled nothing but death and destruction for the world.

Dream stumbled after the next teleportation, his foot catching on a collection of rocks hidden beneath the snow. He cursed as he caught himself, noting how the tips of his toes and fingers were numb from the cold.

If Tommy was out here in this - he was likely close to death freezing to death in one of these snowbanks. Though Dream doubted Tommy was anywhere near here, the boy could've run miles away by now - and he honestly had no idea which direction the boy had run after he left Logstedshire. All he had to rely on was a broken compass that sat sadly in his palms, it's arrow spinning erratically now, hesitating momentarily southward.

Dream clenched the compass until his hand shook and the shattered glass in the mechanism cracked further.

This was pointless. The thing wasn't even working and left him following meaningless breadcrumbs that were likely the remnants of Technoblade anyway. Tommy wasn't anywhere near here - Dream was wasting time.

He was wasting precious time.

Dream whirled around and started back for L'Manburg, the snowy winds blasting into his mask mercilessly as he strode back towards Technoblade's house. Dream took out another ender pearl but hesitated before throwing it.

Perhaps Techno had seen Tommy. Perhaps Techno still didn't know about what had happened between Dream and Phil...

Perhaps he did.

Dream didn't like uncertainties.

He also didn't like wasting his time, so if he could do something productive on this trip northward he could quell some of that boiling anger in his chest. He would see if Techno was a friend or a foe. He could send a message that he knew where Techno lived... it would also be nice to see an old friend again, if Techno was indeed still a friend.

Dream gently pressed a hand on his mask and closed his eyes.

"Techno," he kept his voice gentle, Technoblade was always unnerved by what was gentle. "Mind if I drop by really quick? I have something I'd like to talk to you about."

~~~

_It was dark. So very, very dark. Tommy wandered around Pogtopia, using his hands to guide him around the rough cave walls and straining to listen for any sign of life. Where had the lanterns gone? Why... why was it so dark? His footsteps echoed through the cold stone offering accompany to the dripping water that trickled down the cave walls._

_"Tommy," a familiar voice murmured._

_A warm orange light flickered to life behind Tommy causing the boy to turn and find Wilbur behind him. Wilbur, sitting on a wooden chest, hunched over like a wounded soldier, dressed in patch-work garb and a tattered trenchcoat whose collar was perhaps a bit too high. Wilbur, with his messy hair that hung over one of his eyes with the rest of it bunched into an old beanie that had fallen limp from use. Wilbur, whose eyes were entranced by the burning match in his hand, like it was something beautiful he didn't dare look away from._

_"Wil-Wilbur" Tommy's voice broke halfway between the word._

_It couldn't be Wilbur... Wilbur was dead. Wilbur was dead. Wilbur was -_

_"Why did you betray me, Tommy?" Wilbur's voice cracked. He sounded so hurt, so shattered. Tommy's eyes widened as he took a step back._

_Wilbur still hadn't looked up from the match that was nearing his fingertips._

_"I - I didn't," Tommy tried to sound strong._

_"You promised we'd be in it together," Wilbur murmured weakly, finally looking up from the small flame and right into Tommy's eyes. Wilbur's eyes were deep, brown like the wood in thick forests... A forest burning down to ash - but they were large and sad, tears flecked their corners like watery frames._

_Suddenly, the match went out and the two were plunged into darkness again. Tommy tensed as he waited for the attack; the strike of a sword, the blow of an ax, the simple crack that came with a palm as it connected with his face. All he got was a voice - a familiar beautiful voice that had sung him lullabies and told him stories, a voice that sounded so fucking sad he thought he may break with it._

_"What happened?" Wilbur's voice rang out in the darkness, bouncing off the walls of Pogtopia. Silver moonlight began spilling in from the roof, perfectly illuminating the scene before Tommy who had to choke back a sob._

_Wilbur; strewn on the floor like a broken doll. A hole in his chest like a little diagonal slot that leaked his crimson lifeblood. Tommy took an unsteady step back, then another, and another._

_This wasn't real - this wasn't real - this wasn't real._

_"Tommy?" a new voice asked uncertainly._

_Tommy leaped around and found himself facing a teary-eyed Tubbo. They were on the walls of L'Manburg now - the obsidian walls Dream had put up. It was raining. It was raining and Tubbo was crying._

_"Tubbo," Tommy breathed._

_"Tommy, why did you hurt us?" Tubbo pleaded as he wiped his nose with one of his suit sleeves. "Why?"_

_"What - I - I didn't hurt anyone - " Tommy began desperately._

_"You hurt EVERYONE!" Tubbo cried anger laced in between every painful word. "You're SELFISH!"_

_"I... I didn't mean to... I - " Tommy could feel tears prickle his eyes as he took another step back._

_He didn't... he really didn't._

_He hadn't meant for Dream to get so angry. He didn't mean for the walls to go up. He hadn't meant to mess it all up..._

_he hadn't..._

_He took another step back and found himself slipping off the edge of that obsidian wall, plunging off the side with a yelp._

_Tubbo didn't move to catch him._

_Tommy fell. He fell and fell and fell -_

_But he never hit the ground._

_He found himself lying in the sand of Logstedshire. The sun was out - that was rare - and the waves were calm. Tommy sat up and looked around uncertainly. It was calm and quiet now... safe even. He wasn't falling, it wasn't raining, there was no moon or fire or blood..._

_"Tommy."_

_That voice sent shivers up his spine as it curled in his ear. Tommy jumped to his feet and whirled around to face -_

_Dream._

_"Dream," he choked out._

_"Why did you betray me, Tommy... Why did you hurt me?" Dream asked gently taking a steady stop towards him._

_"No... no, no, I didn't, I didn't!" Tommy cried as he frantically backed away._

_"I was your friend! I came and visited you! I took care of you!" Dream sounded hurt, he stretched out his arms like he wanted a hug. Tommy shivered as his eyes ran up those callused hands, following his gaze down Dream's arm and up his cloak until he was staring into those beady dotted eyes._

_"You... I didn't - "_

_"You DID! After everything I did, you betrayed me!" Dream cried._

_"No - NO!" Tommy clapped his hands over his ears and closed his eyes trying to ignore how his face was growing wet from the tears streaming down it. "No..."_

_"You hurt everyone, Tommy," Dream's voice rang out in his head - he couldn't escape it._

_Suddenly Tommy was in Dream's arm, Dream's hand was carding through his hair, Tommy's nose was filled with the scent of foliage and dew as he buried his face in that cloak._

_"You hurt everyone," Dream repeated._

_It wasn't true, it wasn't true - It wasn't TRUE_

  


"Tommy!"

Tommy choked down a scream as he flew up out of bed, nearly slamming into Phil who's face had been hovering over his own as the man shook him. Tommy shuddered as he looked around for the reason of Philza's urgent awakening.

"Tommy, we have to go," Philza urged as he grabbed Tommy's arm and dragged him out of bed. Tommy's foot caught in the sheets of Techno's stupidly large and comfy bed that had been strewn on the ground, causing him to stumble. His face would've met that wooden floor had Phil not grabbed him and dragged him towards the ladder.

"What - What's going on!?" Tommy cried desperately as he struggled to regain his footing. Phil rushed him down that ladder. He blinked the sleep out of his eyes after he descended and realized as he looked up that Philza was shadowed by two huge grey wings. "Your... Your WINGS!"

"He's close! GO!" Techno's sharp order made Tommy flinch as he fearfully backed away from the hybrid who was pulling a sword out of a chest while watching the windows like a predator at the foot of a cave. There was anger in Techno's gaze and Tommy spied two pearl-white stubs poking out of the man's lips like tusks.

"Wha - what? What's going on!?" Tommy demanded as Phil ushered him down the next ladder before following suit.

"We've got to hide, mate," Philza soothed as they descended into Techno's cold basement. The stone was freezing against Tommy's bare feet and he subconsciously began to shiver. A dark pickaxe materialized in Phil's hand and with one strong stoke the newly-winged man had broken through Techno's floor revealing the small crawlspace beneath.

Tommy felt his throat close at the sight of the dark hole.

_"Armor in the hole, Tommy. You know the drill"_

"Come on, Tommy, we've got to get in," Philza urged.

"Get in?" Tommy's voice cracked. The confusion and fear all flew away in a sudden rush of emptiness that clutched his chest.

In... in the hole?

__

_"Light the dynamite, Tommy. I want you to do it."_

"No... no, please Phil," Tommy begged, backing away. He didn't want to go in... he didn't -

He smelled smoke; smoke and ash. His ears were starting to ring.

Philza looked up at him and those blue eyes seemed to read everything - he seemed to understand everything.

Tommy wanted that. He wanted to understand what was going on this this fucking useless brain of his that was all foggy and confusing making him want to cry, scream, and stay perfectly silent all at once.

"Mate... mate, it's okay. I'm going down with you, you're not going to be alone," Philza soothed gently approaching Tommy. He grabbed Tommy's hands and that... that was grounding.

This callused hands gently ran over Tommy's cracked skin. Tommy focused on that. He focused on Philza's hands, how rough and coarse they were but how gently they held his own. He focused on the scars that lined Phil's skin like little miscolored lines - like the lines of color he'd get when he colored with a marker when he was younger giving him those rainbow stripes that Tubbo would laugh at before doing the same. They'd laugh as they looked at those lines and Wilbur would make fun of them with a smile on his face, he'd usually had his guitar and would start singing something about rainbow boys and streaks of color - the words never matted in the end anyway...

Philza led him with those hands to the hole - no, _don't think about the hole_. Think about Phil's hands, those strong and strangely small hands compared to Tommy's own. Those hands that guided him down, down, down. They slipped into the dim of the hole that was soon plunged into absolute darkness once Philza sent to work covering the hole back up.

It was dark and cold - so fucking cold. Tommy's skin pricked and his throat started closing.

"Phil - Phil what's going on?" Was that... was that his voice? It was small and weak and... broken. It sounded so wrong to Tommy...

Large strong arms wrapped around him and pulled him close into a warm chest. There was a rustle of feathers as Phil's new wings wrapped around them, brushing against Tommy's ankles. Like... a cocoon.

"Phil," he begged. He was so cold and unsure and - 

"Shhh," Phil pleaded, running a hand through Tommy's hair. That should've been something calming - Wilbur used to do it all the time but now...

Tommy felt Dream's callused fingers running through his hair, he heard his voice whispering in that gentle honey-thick tone and - 

And he couldn't breathe.

Why was he here, why was he here, why was he down here?

What had he done? What had he done _wrong_?!

"It's okay, you're okay, I'm sorry," Philza breathed in his ear, holding him tighter and slowly starting to rock him.

Tommy choked down a sob.

"I'm so sorry, you're gonna be okay," Philza breathed.

Tommy felt warm tears run down his face as he buried his face into Dream's cloak. He must've done something wrong. He must've done something - this was his punishment. Being here in the dark and the cold - 

"Dream, I'm sorry," Tommy pleaded quietly.

"Please, Tommy, please be quiet," Dream begged - Dream never begged.

A kiss was pressed to his forehead, sending shocks through Tommy's body.

The fog cleared for a moment - as if someone had just taken it all away. Dream wasn't here. He was under Techno's basement in Phil's arm. Phil was shaking - why was Phil shaking? Tommy slowly opened his tearful eyes and found Phil shakily pressing his lips to Tommy's head with tears in his eyes that seemed to be glowing in this darkness.

"We're gonna be okay. You're gonna be okay," Philza breathed breaking away and pulling Tommy back into his chest. The man was shaking - that seemed so wrong.

"Phil - Phil what's going on?" Tommy demanded pulling himself out of Phil's embrace that wasn't near as strong as it had been. The boy turned his head towards the stone ceiling and began to get to his feet when he heard something shift above him.

There was a footstep a few floors up - someone stepped on the loose floorboard. Techno never stepped on the loose floorboard. Even Tommy had learned to avoid that floorboard in the short time he'd been here.

The fog was returning to Tommy's mind and Phil's shaking was stilling. Phil reached up and pulled him close so that Tommy's back was pressed into Philza while those large wings wrapped further around him. Tommy sat there absolutely confused, trying to peer through the dark, past the large feathery shapes of Phil's large wings.

"So, mind if I take a look around the place," a new voice rang out above them as someone climbed down the ladder. Tommy felt every vein in his body turn to ice.

Dream. _Dream_. It was _Dream_...

The fog was back and it was choking Tommy, strangling him for all he was worth as conflicting emotions went to war.

Dream was his friend. Dream hurt him. Philza was good. Philza abandoned him. Wilbur was good. Wilbur hurt him. Technoblade hurt him. Technoblade was his friend.

There was a scream in his throat, building and gurgling out as his skin prickled and his nerves fired at millions of miles a second. He had to let it out - it was tearing him apart, ripping into his throat as it tried to escape.

He opened his mouth to release it - 

Philza clamped a hand over his mouth and pressed it firm like a vice over his face. Tommy tried to scream - he wanted to, but Philza's voice in his ear was whispering small begs; pleading with him to stay quiet as he rocked him back and forth.

Tommy should listen. Listening hurt less. He'd made Phil mad. Phil was upset. Tommy closed his eyes and shuddered as a strangled sound pressed out of his lips and tried to squeeze through Philza's hand. His tears seemed to be the warmest thing in the room as they ran down his face and stung his eyes.

Someone was opening chests in the room above them, their boots clicking against the cold stone as they paced the room.

"I really would prefer you not go through my stuff." Techno... that was Technoblade. Technoblade was a friend.

__

_"Then DIE LIKE ONE!!!"_

No - NO - Technoblade killed Tubbo. He could hear it - Tubbo's pained scream ripping through the sound of fireworks. His hands shook as remembered bloody knuckles and a bruised face - his blood dripping off Technoblade's knuckles as the hybrid looked at him coldly. The air smelled like smoke and death as the terrifying scream-like calls of the Withers filled his head.

"What's this?" Dream's voice was cold. It was cold and terrifying and he was angry and Tommy was going to get hurt. Tommy immediately turned around and drove his face into the only source of warmth in this cold cellar, clenching the fabric in front of him, balling it in his fists as his entire body shuddered.

Phil held him tighter like he was afraid Tommy was going to fall into a million little pieces - which may have been a fair assertion.

Tommy wanted to beg, wanted to _scream_. He did none of that. He only sat there and shivered while Phil rubbed his back and rocked him back and forth. All the while his friend-not-friend paced the upstairs. 

"You're okay... you're okay... you're okay," Philza repeated over and over again, his breath hardly louder than the rustle of Tommy's soft clothes on his icy skin.

But Tommy... Tommy didn't feel _okay_ and he hadn't felt okay in a long time. A part of him felt (knew) that he'd never be okay again.

He was broken. He was broken. He was...

~~~

"What's this?" Dream asked, his voice had suddenly gone hard as he pulled a familiar porcelain mask out of one of the downstairs chest.

Techno felt his heart skip a beat. That was the mask he had found on the night he found Tommy curled up in the snow...

He could've kicked himself.

_BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD He KNOWS! Oh NO HE KNOWS ABOUT TOMMY! Carl? uh oh HE KNOWS dream vs technoblade BLOOD HE KNOWS HE KNOWS HE KNOWS UHHHHHH Philza!! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!! Technolies! SCARED! BLOOD! He Knows Uh oh_

"Oh, that?" Techno asked, keeping his voice as nonchalant as possible despite the growing red in his vision. "Found it a while ago in the snow while taking Carl for a ride, figured it was yours.

_TechnoLIE BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD chatdistract!! Blood!Blood!Blood! Kill! Revenge!_

Dream studied the mask he had in his hands while Techno struggled to hide his bloodlust. His tusks were growing - he could feel them pressing against his lips much like the voices pressing on his skull.

"It is mine," Dream agreed finally. "I was wondering where it went... must've lost it when I was exploring."

"Oh, good, was a little weirded out by it, you know - Never knew you had other masks that didn't have the - " Techno pointed to his face as it lit up in what he hoped was the most terrifying smile the godling had ever seen.

"Yeah," Dream's voice revealed he was smiling. "And you're sure you haven't seen Tommy?"

_He doesn't suspect OH NO! UHHHH whoops BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! Tommysafe? Technosafe? PHILZA!! DADZA! Dead Dream. Homeless man BLOOD! oh no he totally knows Technobusted KILL! ummmm_

"I told you, if the kid did come up here, I haven't seen him. He probably would avoid me like the plague anyway," Techno stated simply, crossing his arms.

Dream hummed as he nodded. "Yeah... I suppose trying to kill him with Withers and executing his friend just aren't the best ways to go make him a friend."

_Ohhhhhhhhhh He didn't just - BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! HOMELESSGREENMANROASTSPIGBOI BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! HAHA - LOSER! KILL KILL KILL KILL! TEAR HIM APART! ANARCHY! ABORT ABORT! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!!! haha BLOODFORTHEBLOODGODBLOODFOR -_

"Yeah," Techno managed as he scratched his head trying to ignore the cacophony.

"If you see him, just, let me know," Dream asked politely as he tucked Tommy's mask in his cloak and brushed past Technoblade to reach for the ladder.

"Absolutely," Techno gave a curt nod, forcing his breaths to stay steady and slow as the voices screamed and demanded blood, _blood from the godling blood from the one who hurt Phil who harmed Phil spill it on the ground and let it stain the floor with the crimson leave nothing behind let the scarlet fill the room feed us feed us blood for the blood god he's in your reach all you have to do it throw him to the ground and slam his head again and again to feed us give us the blood let him bleed for what he's done blood for the blood god -_

"And... Techno." Dream paused with his hands on the ladder rungs.

"Hmm?" Techno clamped his jaw down, wincing as his tusks dug into his lips.

"Has Phil contacted you?"

Hand on the sword hilt. Fingers wrapped around the hilt. Techno could fee the familiar indents in the leather-wrapped hilt where his finger longed to be. His mind was full of voices screaming vengeance, remembering the ugly blue and black bruising that still sat on Phil's rips, the ax blow in his arm, the chunk of skin missing from Phil's head.

He thought of how if Dream's ax had been just a little more accurate, Phil would've been gone -and he wouldn't have been able to stop it.

"No... why?" Techno asked, almost breathless. His vision was turning a dark red, thumping with his heartbeat.

"I need to talk to him," Dream shrugged, finally ascending the ladder and leaving Techno's sword range. The bloodlust faded a bit. 

"About what?" Techno asked, slowly following the masked man.

He could probably take him. He could take Dream by surprise, pin him to the ground and plunge his sword through that perfect little mask. It didn't even have to be a surprise attack - he could give him a headstart. He could chase Dream down and snap his legs like toothpicks, beat him within an inch of his life until the voices were satisfied - until Philza was avenged and safe. He could do it - he could fight and _make him bleed, make Dream bleed until the godling begged and pleaded for life but those pleas would mean nothing for he had hurt Phil and he needed to be punished no one touched Phil and lived no one hurt Phil -_

"Just stuff," Dream's voice chuckled from above.

Techno paused his ascension and nearly contemplated slamming his head in a wall.

"We can't chat... we do it and he'll know," he breathed carefully to those voices.

They roared for blood anyway. They cared nothing for consequence; only for violence and vengeance.

"I just haven't seen him in L'Manburg recently so - you know, I figured if anyone had seen him, it was you," Dream's voice almost sounded like a taunt - but surely, surely the masked man was stupid enough to be taunting Techno while nearly everything in him screamed to tear the godling in two?

"Uh, no," Techno sighed as he reached the upper level. "Haven't heard from Phil in a while now - figured he was out working on his secret base."

"He has a base?" Dream perked up.

"Well, yeah, but I figured the term 'secret' clued you into the rest of that message."

"Do you know where it is?"

"No," Techno answered slowly. "You do know how secrets work, right?"

"Yeah, yeah okay," Dream waved him off. "Alright, don't tell me."

Techno huffed as the man opened the front doors, letting in a blast of cold air and a parade of dancing snowflakes.

"But you will tell me if you find Tommy... I'm worried about him. He's just a kid, can't really handle himself too well out here," Dream muttered as his mask stared into the blizzard.

Techno voted to ignore the sudden crescendo of angry screams in his head as he gave a slow nod.

"Sure. Doubt he'll show up here though."

"Thanks, Techno," Dream sighed, still standing at the edge of the doorway. Techno waited patiently for him to leave - but was sorely disappointed when the masked man turned around and shut the doors behind him.

"Are you going get out of here or do I need to start writing an eviction notice?" Techno deadpanned.

"Could I just... could we talk for a moment," Dream asked as he walked over to the fire. Edward leaned away from the godling, letting out an unhappy sort of warble. Dream's mask turned towards the enderman and tilted, as if he was some confused puppy.

"Dream - come on it's... it's like two in the morning!" Techno sighed.

"Just... a quick chat," Dream urged.

_Kill! KILL! Tommyhurt! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! Dream sad? greenblobboi Blood for the blood God PHILZA BLOOD TechnoDUMB KILL He KNOWSSSSS Ummm Bloodbloodblood-_

"How quick?" Techno demanded.

"Do remember... many years ago, when we first met?" Dream asked, his attention turning away from Edward and back to the fire, his hands hidden in his cloak.

"I - I gotta be honest with you Dream, not really in the mood to reminisce," Techno grumbled.

"Would you do it again?" Dream's question was startling; loud and raw - something the godling usually avoided being.

"Do... What do you mean 'do it again'?" Techno snickered. "The murder part or the - "

"If you were to get corrupted, would you go that far to fix it again?" Dream asked gently.

Techno narrowed his eyes as he thought of Drista's words. He stayed perfectly still near the ladder and crossed his arms, glaring at the back of Dream's head.

"Would you?" Techno retorted cooly.

There was a long hesitation, long enough for Techno's skin to prickle as even his voices leaned into the godling's answer.

"I... yes," Dream answered finally - it was soft, strangely vulnerable. "Yes, I would. You?"

The voices stopped crying loudly for blood as Techno took a breath.

He'd almost forgotten how complicated life got when Dream was involved. It was always how it worked, with sudden emergences of honesty. For a man so wrapped up in lies and deceit, he'd always been strangely honest with himself around Technoblade... and for some reason... Techno felt his throat longing to respond.

Dream understood him... in a way Phil hadn't always had - but that wasn't settling. It wasn't ever comforting.

Dream turned to him, those dotted eyes not nearly as beady as they had been when Techno had first seen them.

"Would you?" Dream hung the question in the air again and it weighed heavily on Techno's shoulders.

He remembered the fogginess of corruption, how... how lost it had felt. He'd been a puppet to his instincts - he remembered blood and screams. He remembered how for the first time in his life all of the voices had been in absolute agreement, how they had cheered and chanted filling the entire world with their eagerness - it had been so freeing, so wonderfully relieving...

But he also remembered Phil's tears. He had made Phil cry.

Techno looked down at his fine garb and held himself a little tighter as he recalled the scent of blood in his nose and how the substance had slipped between his fingers and dripped off his sword like water.

"No," he growled.

He looked up and met Dream's eyes.

"I'm not saying I... It's not that I disagree with what I did - I did the right thing," Techno stated firmly.

"We did," Dream nodded slowly. Techno threw him a glare - it hadn't been a 'we' sort of statement.

"But... but I'm not... I don't like just being a Blade, Dream." Techno held out his hands and looked at their pale complexion, how there were littered with burns and scars like a worn book. "I'm more than a weapon, and I'm more than my oath."

_"We're more than the just higher powers we're held to, mate. You're still a person... you're still a kid..."_

"You said somethin' once, Dream... about how you hated being a puppet to the universe," Technoblade growled.

Dream nodded slowly.

"Well... that's all we are when we're corrupted - when we let it get to our heads. So, if you want to go lose yourself, go for it... but..." Techno took a step towards Dream, fully aware of how he towered over the lithe hunter. "But if you're asking me this because you're thinking of starting something like that, and you hurt me... you hurt Phil more... and I'll kill you, Dream. Don't... don't think that our history somehow makes us buddies."

Dream nodded. "Never thought it did. I wasn't asking as a friend... I was asking as a godling... as someone who knows what you go through."

"And I'm telling you, as Technoblade - I... I don't recommend you try to pull a similar stunt this time. I _will_ stop you."

Dream nodded before silently sliding past, towards the door - Techno noticed he was mindful of the loose floorboard this time, those brown boots gracefully landing lightly as they headed for the door.

"Thanks, Techno," Dream dismissed. His voice lifted into that familiar fake cheeriness as the masked man gave him a wave and open the door. "Always nice to see you."

With that, the cloaked figure slipped out in the blizzard, leaving Technoblade to close the door behind him. Techno watched Dream make his way south before the man vanished in a cascade of purple particles - teleporting out of his vision.

"Can't say the same," Techno murmured, taking a long breath.

__

_He GOT AWAY! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! Tommy!! blood? Carl! Ranboo!!! BLOOD! Dream'shousenotfound Ghostburrrrr BLOOD!! Tommy hurt TechnoLIES PHILZAAA_

Techno shook his head and climbed down the ladder once more, taking one last moment to check the windows for prying eyes before descending and tapping on the floor with his boots.

"It's okay - he's gone now," Techno called.

They hadn't been given much time to plan for Dream's unprecedented visit (honestly, the guy had woken him up in the middle of the night with one of those stupid mental messages). Techno should've just stabbed him for that. Luckily, Techno had been emptying out a lower floor for storage and such. It wasn't large but it had held Philza and Tommy well enough...

Why weren't they coming out?

"Hallo?" Techno called uncertainly, crouching down and putting his hands on the floor. "Phil? Tommy?"

A pickaxe materialized in his hands and with a heavy blow he managed to break through the flimsy replacement rocks Phil had concealed the entrance with.

"Hello??" Techno called again, sticking his head down the hole.

"We're down here Techno," Phil assured him, his voice was strained and shaky, like an uneasy rowboat boat taking on water.

A strangled sound reached his sharp ears and quick as he could Techno had pulled a torch from the wall and was sticking it down the hole illuminating a sorry scene.

Phil was cradling Tommy who looked... pathetic. Yeah, pathetic was a good word.

"Is he... uh... anything I can do?" Techno asked awkwardly as Philza rocked the boy who was burying his face into Phil's shoulders and silently sobbing.

"Yeah, help me get him out," Philza ordered weakly.

Techno dropped down into the hole as Philza unfurled his wings out of the protective cocoon they'd been draped in. Tommy curled closer to Philza as that soft feathery blanket was taken away. Techno lay the torch off to the side to give some light and uneasily tried to hold his hands out in a _'hand the child to me if you must'_.

"It's okay, Tommy. It's okay. He's gone," Philza soothed shakily as he bushed Tommy's long bangs out of the boy's face. Tommy shuddered under that touch, as if he couldn't decide whether to pull away or lean into that contact. The boy seemed half-awake, entranced in some nightmare that he still wasn't still quite awake from.

"Help him up there," Philza pleaded as he struggled to stand, holding the boy as close as he could and wincing as his wounds doubtlessly acted up. Techno had to swallow a cry of alarm as he saw pain flicker across Phil's face. Yeah - there was no way he was lifting Tommy up to the next floor in that state - it was a miracle he'd gotten Tommy down here without hurting himself.

Why was he like this? Why were they both like this?

Techno reached out, somewhat uncertain on how he was supposed to pry Tommy away from Philza but deciding that the torso was the best bet. He wrapped his arms around the boy's chest and began to lift -

Tommy screamed. His silence was gone in a long torn scream that faded into begging as he clung to Phil as if his life depended on it.

Techno almost dropped him in shock. Tommy's legs gave in and he fell like dead weight in Techno's arms, Phil dropped down with him in comfort so they both were on their knees. Techno didn't let go until Tommy was back on the ground.

__

_Tommysadinnit KILL! BLOOD! help him BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD help him Fix him. broken Therapy Dadza? BLOOD!_

"Tommy, Tommy, it's okay," Philza soothed gently cupping Tommy's face and staring into his eyes that were just overflowing with tears. Techno didn't know it was possible for someone to cry so heavily. 

"Please... Please, I don't want to go back, I don't want to go back," Tommy begged as he clung to Philza's haori. He shook his head viciously and buried it back in Phil's shoulder. 

"Tommy we're just going to get you out of here, okay? You're going to be alright, mate."

"I don't want to," Tommy begged in a sob. "I don't want to - I'll be better. I'll be good."

_KILL! KILL! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! KILL DREAM!!! HELP TOMMY HURT! PROTECT HIM! HELP! KILL! BLOOD! SAVE HIM! REVENGE! PHIL! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!_

"Techno," Philza's voice was low. "Techno be ready to help him up."

That wasn't a good tone.

Techno wasn't able to get a word in as Phil's gently pressed his fingertips against Tommy's skull and closed his eyes.

"Phil - Phil wait!" Techno demanded.

He couldn't take in all of Tommy's baggage right now - TOMMY couldn't take all of his own baggage right now!! And Phil was injured and tired and - 

Tommy's sobs grew silent as the boy stilled. Like a mirror image of how Tommy had been, Phil squeezed his eyes shut and clenched his jaw before his entire body started shivering as if he had been left out in the cold.

"Phil?" Tommy asked uncertainly, his eyes a little brighter as he slowly released Philza's haori.

"Come on, Tommy," Techno urged reaching down and grabbing Tommy's shoulders. 

"What's... what's going on?" Tommy asked as Techno led him away.

"Up you get," Techno ordered, trying to be gentle as he hoisted Tommy to the hole in the ceiling.

"Techno - " Tommy asked before he let out a small yelp at finding Techno's strength being used to lift him to the upper level. The boy climbed into the proper basement, peering down uncertainly at Techno with wide eyes that were flickering with fear.

Phil probably couldn't keep all Tommy's thoughts and madness for long. Techno threw an uncertain glance back at the shuddering angelic figure before taking a breath and hoisting himself up after Tommy.

"Come on, let's get you upstairs," Techno tried to be gentle like the voices (some of them at least) instructed.

Tommy shakily climbed up the ladders and stumbled into the living room. Techno led him over to a padded chair before draping him with a thick wool blanket - it had been freezing down there and Tommy was lucky he hadn't gotten pneumonia from his last endeavor out in the cold. Techno wasn't going to push it or Phil would be up all night in watchful vigilance for the sick kid.

"T-Techno," Tommy stuttered as he pulled the blanket further around him.

"Yeah?" Techno was rustling through his cabinets for a package of tea leaves - they all deserved a cup after today (or... maybe it was yesterday by this point?)

"Dream was here," Tommy choked.

Techno looked back and saw Tommy staring into the fire, his gaze much like it had been when he had been clinging on to Phil but with less terror and tears.

"He... was, yes," Techno agreed as he pulled out the tin can of leaves and pulled out his tea kettle.

"Why?" Tommy pleaded.

"To talk. You - you know the guy isn't a very nice guest, I mean he's going through my stuff and asking me all these questions. He didn't even ask permission to show up he just invited himself - "

"Was he looking for me?" Tommy almost sounded hopeful making Techno want to break something. _Take a breath. Close your eyes_. He forced himself to breathe until the red at the edge of his vision faded.

"Yes, Tommy. He was looking for you," Techno murmured, watching the boy carefully for a response.

"Was... was he angry?"

Techno voted to stay silent with that question as he poured some of his bottled water into the kettle. If he said yes - Tommy may break down again. If he said no - Tommy may keep sounding hopeful and happy that Dream ( _Dream who had hurt Phil, who had made Phil bleed_ ) had been in this house looking for him.

"He's... he's a good friend, Dream I mean," Tommy murmured tiredly.

"You sure?" Techno asked as he poured a heavy dose of leaves into the water and set it by the fire. Edward made a happy chirp as he recognized the kettle (Techno always did make the fire a bit bigger when he was making tea). Techno fanned the flames a bit before looking back to Tommy. "You sure he's a friend?"

Tommy was holding the blanket closer to him, his eyes foggy and grey, a lot like the clouds that promised snow. "Yeah... he always comes to see me."

There was a creak from the ladder as Philza ascended. The man looked a bit shaken but his eyes were bright again. Techno went to greet him when Tommy spoke again.

"He was always there for me," Tommy murmured. "When no one else was... right? Right? No... no... that's... my head feels all shit again."

Philza's eyes were full of pain as he walked over and put a hand on Tommy's shoulder. Tommy flinched at the touch but watched Philza with wide eyes as the man crouched down beside him.

"You feeling okay?" Philza asked gently.

"No," Tommy's voice cracked at the truthful answer but if there was something the boy sorely lacked, it was communication skills, and so he said nothing more. Techno could... he could understand that.

The voices started growing in volume again.

Techno kept his jaw clenched as the voices chanted and cooed. Some reminded him of similar times when he had looked at Phil with wide eyes and a fearful voice that never seemed to be able to tell the older man what was wrong, only that it was wrong and he wanted it to stop.

Techno swallowed a growl as he pushed those thoughts away.

Philza was gently rubbing Tommy's shoulder in the strangely alluring silence, his movements slow and gentle like he was lulling Tommy back to sleep.

"You're not going back, mate," Phil's voice broke the silence finally. "Not if I can help it. You're staying here, with me, with Techno. We'll keep you safe."

"Techno?" Tommy's voice broke again. "He killed Tubbo."

Oh for the love of - Really!? He just sheltered the kid and they were back here again!?

"I was peer pressured," Techno responded instinctively.

_Peer pressure! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! TUBBO IS GONE!!! Peer Pressure! Technobullied!!_

"BULLSHIT!" Tommy cried angrily, despite his cracking voice, throwing the blanket off of him as he tried to stand. Phil was at his side, soothing him and trying to calm him down as the boy stood up - like he was going to lunge at Technoblade. Techno stiffened in preparation as Philza held the boy back.

"YOU KILLED TUBBO! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE ON OUR SIDE - You were supposed to be with us... you killed him... you destroyed L'Manburg... you... you..." Tommy was sobbing again. He was holding on to Philza and sobbing.

Techno felt the voices pounding in his head... but they weren't as strong as the strange lump in his throat. His chest strangely hurt more than his head and while he didn't quite understand it he knew that it would probably lead to the voices getting louder so he turned and abruptly walked out the door, noting the sad call of 'Techno' from Phil's lips before he stormed off into the snow.

Why didn't Tommy understand - why didn't he understand?

He was exiled from that town - that country that Techno had warned would fall like all the others. Still - _still_ Tommy defended them, after everything they did to him! But no, Tommy couldn't see that, couldn't forgive Techno. Because he was right, he was the bad guy - because...

_BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD_

Ah, there they were.

Techno shoved everything in his chest and throat further down as he scanned the terrain and found a plethora of monsters to hunt in the icy gale. He could do killing. He could handle blood and bile and pained shrieks and moans from the many monsters he'd grown up fighting.

He couldn't... he didn't do whatever it was Tommy wanted, no, _needed_ him to do.

Tommy was a stupid kid who was following the same footsteps of every other fool that came before him. Half of this was his fault anyway - but somehow it was Techno's fault!?

No - no, Techno let out a strange sort of battle cry as he carved a zombie in two. All of the strange things in his chest manifesting into some sort of broken roar.

He waited for the pain to go away, waited for the weird weight in his chest to give way to the joyous calls of the chatter as they praised him for his kill...

The chatter was strangely quiet. The northern wind howled and roared but the voices seemed strangely tame despite the blood on Techno's sword. He wasn't even seeing red.

_Technosad? Technosad Blood? Phil? Tommy Dream! Wilbur. Technosad Ghostbur Dadza Tommy bloodforthebloodgod_

Names... all names. Names that made the feeling in Techno's chest twist and turn - he hated it, he hated it. 

He carved through a skeleton praying for a louder reaction from the voices - then he turned to a spider. More and more. He needed more. He raced around that storm littering his path with corpses and blood until the voices were cheering, finally dropping whatever soft sayings they had been murmuring.

Techno panted after he dislodged his sword from the remains of a creeper, the voices in his head cheering, drowning out that feeling in his chest - shrinking it down until he could breathe again. Techno took a long breath and sheathed his sword, closing his eyes as the snow blew around him...

His eyes stung... 

He... he hadn't been crying...

He hadn't.

~~~

Philza gently handed Tommy a cup of tea and watched the boy's eyes get lost as they stared at the contents.

"It's good for you, mate. It'll help you relax," Phil urged gently as he sat down on the chest next to Tommy. Edward let out a happy hum, clearly pleasantly surprised by all this early morning company.

Techno had been gone a while now and it was taking everything in Phil's power to not go looking for him. He didn't care how much prowess Techno had, he was a fool to be out in that storm this early in the morning.

"Phil," Tommy breathed.

"Yeah mate?" Philza asked as he poured himself his own cup of tea.

"Why - why are you helping me?"

Philza looked at the boy and felt his wings shift subconsciously as they refolded themselves uneasily.

"Because, mate... you're - " Philza began.

"I can't... I can't replace Wilbur," Tommy breathed.

Philza felt his heart clench.

"Tommy, Tommy _no_ , that's not - "

"Then _why_!? Why are you wasting time?" Tommy demanded with his cracking voice. "If you're not trying to make up for Wilbur, then... why are you wasting time with me!"

"You aren't a waste of time," Philza stated firmly, trying to keep his voice gentle despite the rage in his chest that wanted to throttle whoever had made him think that he was _ever_ a waste of time or space or - 

He knew exactly who had made Tommy feel like that... it wasn't a question at this point.

"I'm all messed up, Phil... I know I am and I know you're - you're... I know you're trying to help me - I - I don't..." Tommy held his head and bit his lip in frustration.

Phil gently placed his tea aside and got up, his wounds groaning and crying out but being promptly ignored. He knelt down in front of Tommy and slowly, so Tommy could see what he was doing, Philza cupped Tommy's face.

"Tommy... I know I've messed up. I know you're upset at me and... and mate, you have every right to be - but I still _love_ you, Tommy. You are still... you are still my boy and despite all this... shit that's happened, and no matter what's going to happen, that's how it's going to stay. I'm going to keep you safe. I'm going to protect you. I'm not going anywhere, neither is Techno. And... and you can be angry at us all you want, but it's not going to change the fact that I care about you."

"But... but I'm all messed up - " Tommy breathed as he pulled away from Phil and held his head. Phil moved his hands down to Tommy's shoulders and waited the moment it took for Tommy to find his eyes again, those reluctant greys flickering with pain and uncertainty.

"Then we'll get better, together. Okay, mate?" Philza asked gently with the bravest smile he could muster. He had felt everything when he had interfaced with Tommy - he'd felt the confusion and conflict, the panic and despair that must always be sitting at the back of Tommy's throat. He had only been able to take that away from Tommy for a short while in order for Techno to get him upstairs... but those moments had informed him of everything happening in his boy's mind...

He wouldn't even think of leaving Tommy alone until he was certain that fog of conflict had cleared.

Small tears slipped down Tommy's face, nothing like the giant panicked ones that had emerged during his panic attack, but they were just as impactful.

Tommy seemed to want to talk. He opened his mouth and closed it as he looked down, his shoulders trembling as he clenched his teacup with one hand while the other held his head.

"I'm here for you, Tommy," Philza murmured. "And I promise I am _never_ leaving you again."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, look at all that hurt/comfort... would be a shame if someone were to add more hurt for no reason... hehe
> 
> Anyway! Y'all see Tommy's latest stream!? DREAM IS GONE - CRAB RAVE! HAHA! That endgame finale tho, PUNZ SUPREMECY. I was so happy. I couldn't have been happier - you can sue me, I was so freaking happy.


	9. A Heartless Chest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ranboo is not home, luckily. Dream has mommy issues and sees Puffy as a mother figure he lost... Dream actually has a lot of issues and trauma, including him shoving down his emotions - literally! Drista tries to "help" -  
> Drista is NOT a good therapist, she stabs people, with forks.

The snow had melted into rain as Dream teleported his way back, crossing miles in the span of minutes until he was landing in ankle-deep puddles of mud that leaked into his armored shoes and left his feet soggy.

As soon as he believed himself to be close enough he set aside his pearls and took to walking, striding across the drenched territory and leaving light footprints in his wake. Any marks he left behind him were quickly washed away by the torrent.

The rain was... pleasant. Warm and constant as it pelted away at his porcelain mask and dripped down his cloak. No one was out in this weather, nor this early in the morning, leaving Dream to his own devices as he wandered around his familiar stomping grounds.

He took a moment to peruse the halls of Geor- no -Eret's castle, leaving a slightly damp trail in the bright carpet as he paced those halls, running his fingers along the grooves in familiar stone that built up the solid walls. The halls were strangely empty and foreign nowadays, almost otherworldly to the godling as he stopped to run his hands down the many banners, taking a moment to rub the colorful fabric between his fingers...

So many colors... he could pick out each individual shade and admire it as he ran it through his fingers.

There was a void somewhere, something that should be feeling... but Dream felt strangely peaceful. He didn't miss the feeling (whatever feeling it was supposed to be) that should be curling in his chest as he regarded all of those colors.

The godling noted the quiet rooms that housed the castle's inhabitants, being extra cautious as he passed Eret's room (she always had been a light sleeper) as waking them up at this untimely hour would only result in tension. Eret thought the castle was rightfully his as the king, Dream thought he should know better.

 _Of course_ , the castle belonged to Eret - but this world was _Dream's_ and it was _Dream_ that gave Eret his crown, his power... everything. As a king, Eret should be mindful to tread lightly around such benevolent higher beings. Dream had sacrificed much to put the king back on his throne...

Too much, perhaps...

Without much of a second thought, Dream left the castle, drifting back out into the torrent of rain that had his semi-dry cloak soaking yet again in a matter of moments. Dream wandered through the trees, running his hands over their bark and relishing the way the rain bounced off the canopy in a little symphony of splatters and shaking leaves. Dream wandered until the twinkling lights of L'Manburg came into view.

Ah, L'Manburg. The sickness and root of all Dream's problems that had infected _everything_ , everything in this world.

Rage bubbled in Dream's throat as he regarded the town that was lit up, as if someone had trapped the stars on the ground and left them there to rot and flicker in the falling rain. His fingers longed to take a knife to that disease and carve it out of his earth like he would a deep-rooted parasite locked onto his skin...

So much discourse. So much anger and hatred and pain and all for what? A collection of wooden houses and piers built over a hole, like a messy bandage that would never cover the wound it was supposed to conceal? 

Dream's eyes picked through the distant houses, noting the unlit interior lights where L'Manburg's inhabitants slept soundly despite the pouring rain. His eyes settled on the dark interior of a very familiar house that lay still in this downpour.

Dream felt his face curl into a smile.

Oh... he _had_ been meaning to visit Ranboo...

He made his way down the slope, leaping lightly over a small crevice between the mountain and town, landing on Ranboo's house like a light-footed cat. His footsteps went unheard in the pouring rain as he strode over Ranboo's wooden roof. Within a few moments, he was carefully opening the upstairs window and slipping inside, painfully aware that the moment he allowed the cacophony of rain to breach the sound walls it would reach the half-breed's ears. Ranboo would know someone was entering.

Good. Let him panic.

Dream slipped through the window and this time, let his feet land quite heavily on the floor. No real cause for stealth anymore.

"Oh, Ranboo~" he called sweetly as he closed the window behind him and summoned his familiar ax to hand, a bit of blood still on its blade from his skirmish with Phil. The godling's ears strained to make out any sound from the half-enderman but found the house to be strangely silent.

The bed was a mess of sheets lacking any warm body and after a thorough sweep of the room, Dream found no other sign of sentient life.

Something scampered across the floor downstairs.

Dream flew down the ladder in a moment and prepared to intercept the runaway before he bolted for the door - 

The downstairs was also vacant other than the dog who awoke lazily from a fluffy bed in the corner and looked puzzledly towards Dream. Dream slowly approached with outstretched hands, ignoring the warning growls of the canine. He allowed the dog to sniff his gloved hand and let his other hand run through the dog's thick fur, scratching and itching methodically as he lulled the dog out of its aggression. The dog wagged its tail in appreciation and panted in relief as those fingers dug into its skin and soothed its muscles, no longer caring for the stranger invading his master's house. Dream let out a little hum as left the dog and turned to the rest of the empty room. He scanned the tables, counters, and bookshelves that lined the house, hoping to see the familiar glint of mixed eyes or the shuddering figure of someone cowering.

"Ranboo? Are you here?" he asked as he relaxed and began scouring the room closely. His fingers brushed against barrels and crafting tables, running up the sides of brewing stands and down the length of bookshelves. At one point he crouched down to study a chest when something moved in the space between the chest and the wall.

Dream's hands moved like lightning, grabbing the thing that let out an angered yowl. Slowly, Dream stood and studied the struggling black cat that he had held by the scruff. A little nametag dangled from its neck marking it as "Enderchest".

"Oh, how cute," Dream sighed as he studied the angered thing that tried to swipe at him. "Were you left behind?"

Ranboo wasn't here...

Where _was_ he?

Dream scowled under his mask, hating how the expression pulled against his face unnaturally.

The cat hadn't stopped struggling and mindlessly, Dream twirled his ax in his hand, his eyes darting around and easily picking out the other animals in the room. More cats lay slumbering on the top of bookshelves and the dog was still content where he lay, back to sleep like a good little canine.

He wanted to teach the half-breed a lesson and perhaps here would be a good place to start. His grip tightened on the ax as he glanced back at the feline in his grip.

Enderchest let out another yowl as it thrashed in Dream's grip hissing and trying to claw him - Dream was used to cats going limp when held in this position but this cat seemed to be just as foolishly unnatural as its owner. Dream bounced the ax in his hands, noting how it glinted in the dim light.

... He wasn't usually a pet killer. That was someone else's title (There was that feeling again, knowing something was missing from his chest but that it was something he didn't miss as that absence left him feeling at peace).

"I could kill you, you know," Dream sighed as he shook Enderchest a bit. The cat finally fell limp in his grip, still wiggling a bit until Dream finally placed it back on the ground and released it, allowing it to dash under a bench and hiss angrily at the godling.

Dream laughed at the little thing's anger.

Foolish little things. Little mortal things. Things that thought they could stand up to gods and gain control. Things that thought their life was in their hands.

Stupid little things.

Dream would have to return here again... when Ranboo was home and they could have a heart-to-heart chat. The ax in Dream's hands disappeared as a little bubble of anger filled his heart.

He had been so looking forward to this.

Where had Ranboo gone? Did he know where Philza was... where Tommy was? 

Dream chuckled to himself as he unlocked Raboo's door and walked out, leaving the door open behind him.

He'd have to ask Ranboo next time he saw him.

Dream started off again, this time heading towards the Badlands - another minor annoyance. The journey to the other 'country', however, was interrupted as his foolish chest pulled him away at the sight of someone else.

Puffy.

Dream spied the woman making her way through the rain down the Prime Path, her arms full of flowers that she seemed to be trying to protect from the rain. Her fluffy hair was drenched by the rain, the little streak of rainbow color in it looking much duller in this lighting. Her fine clothes were soaked too, the silk uniform drooping from its usual clean-cut and her little pirate hat seemed to sag under the weight of the water.

Dream snapped his fingers.

The rain stopped.

Puffy froze mid-walk and looked up in amazement, a smile lighting up her face as her lamb-like ears perked up. Dream followed her gaze and watched as the clouds drifted away abnormally fast, revealing the twinkling stars behind them.

"HA HA!" Puffy cheered, her voice suddenly clear in the silent night without the sound of raindrops crashing into the ground to drown her out. Puffy seemed to realize that too as she looked around the dark houses sheepishly and laughed a bit before heading towards her and Niki's flower shop.

Dream started to follow. _why was he following?_

He fell into pace with her on the Prime Path, making absolutely certain to keep his footsteps light on the wood as he trailed her.

_why was he being quiet?_

He ducked low when she glanced to the side, her eyes on a giant spider that was wandering a little too close to her for Dream's comfort. _why did he care?_

He slipped out of the bush and continued to quietly trail her, ducking in and out of sight as she continued on, oblivious to him. Something stirred in that still chest of his and he froze for a moment.

  


_"Aww, don't worry little man. We'll fix you up."_

_A warm voice, a gentle voice. Gentle hands that didn't hurt or strike or burn as they pressed a cold cloth on his aching face. A gentle touch as it ruffled his hair and a happy little laugh that sounded like a sheep bleating. The gentle coo of someone who could let his muscles relax because here he was safe, she kept him safe, he could be okay for just a moment..._

_"You've had it rough, haven't you? Who hurt you?"_

  


Dream stumbled.

No, _no_.

Anger coursed through his veins as he pushed down whatever that was. It was _nothing_ , it had to be nothing - 

"Hi duckling!" 

Dream wasn't startled, he _wasn't_.

Puffy had turned around and was smiling at him warmly. 

"Ya know, it's really concerning when someone follows you around at four in the morning, buddy," Puffy snickered.

Dream tried to answer but... but he didn't exactly...

What was he supposed to say?

"Well... what are you doing up so early?" Puffy asked as she turned around and started back down the path.

He should be heading to the Badlands - past the Badlands, to the prison, to Sam.

Then _why_ was he following her?

Why was he just following after this short happy little sheep as she continued on with her life that had _nothing_ to do with him. She even continued speaking after he didn't answer her because her life didn't have room for anything that he could bring to it.

He was nothing to her, and she was nothing to him. This was _nothing_.

"Ya know I found these last night and I just had to get them for Niki, for the shop and all," Puffy explained over her shoulder as she held the flowers in her hand a little higher.

Dream stayed silent. What was he doing? He had to go. Why was he here?

"Do you like them?" Puffy asked.

Dream glanced at the flowers colored blue and white. Blue orchids hung limply, made heavy by the rain while the collection of white lily of the valley sat in little bunches overtop the blue like clouds, also limp from the wet rain but still bright and healthy. There were bunches and bunches of them held in Puffy's hands like she was holding a bit of summer sky.

"Yes." Dream wasn't quite sure where the answer had come from or why he had said it but the way Puffy's face lit up made him feel that it wasn't a waste of breath.

"Awww, well which one is your favorite?" Puffy asked as she turned and held them up a bit higher. 

Dream hesitated. He raised a hand to point and found himself unsure of which color to point at.

Blue... or white? His chest was still empty but there was that sense that he was missing some emotion, missing something human.

There was a cold surge of anger through his veins again.

It shouldn't matter, it _didn't_ matter. They weren't for him and he didn't care.

He didn't - 

Blue or white. Blue or white? _Blue or white_ -

"Here," Puffy had managed to shift all of the flowers in one arm and was picking through them with her soft white-furred hands. Gently she picked out one of each and held them out for Dream to take. Dream found himself struggling to reach out and take those flowers.

Why was he still here?

"Oh, come on, I picked these myself," Puffy laughed as she urged him to take the two wet blooms. Dream finally found it in himself to wrap his fingers around the damp green stems and pulled those two away from Puffy's hand. He held the flowers close and used his other hand to ghost over the delicate petals of the blue and white flowers. They were damp, soft, and so strangely pleasant under his fingers.

"Thank you." That was his instinctive response. He'd been given something and that meant he was supposed to be grateful even if he lacked the warm feeling that should be flickering in his chest...

He did miss feeling grateful sometimes.

No, _no_. No, he didn't.

"Oh, you're welcome Dream," Puffy cooed at him, her ears perking up and her face in a bright smile.

_He didn't. He didn't._

Puffy smiled at him for a bit longer than he wanted her to - why was it her smiles hung on him so long? Why... why did he care?

"I've got to get these to the shop, you coming?" Puffy asked as she turned on her high-heeled boot and started back down the wooden planks.

_No. No, he couldn't - he shouldn't. He didn't -_

He did. He trailed after her. He kept those flowers in his hands as he followed at a distance, his eyes drifting from the flowers to the back of Puffy's head as she walked along, her white fluffy hair bouncing behind her as it dried like she wore a cloud on her head. 

She kept looking back as if to make sure he was still following 

_Why did she care?_

He was always there when she looked back.

_Why did he care that she cared?_

She would give him a smile every time she saw him like he was a pleasant surprise..

_Why?_

He felt the ends of his lips curl into a soft smile when she looked back.

_WHY!?_

Dream hesitated as he watched the flower shop come into view. The windows were warm with light and Dream picked out the figure of Niki as she (the early riser she was) set about to arranging flowers. Puffy saw the same thing so she picked up the pace, but Dream found his feet unwilling to travel any further.

He shouldn't be here. He needed to be elsewhere. He... he was wasting time. His foot landed at his side instead of taking another step forward and he continued no further down the path.

Puffy pushed the door to her shop open and looked back with a broad smile... and Dream was gone.

Well... not completely. Dream still watched her. He sat perched in the tree, watching as Puffy's face fell from a bright smile to a confused sort of sad expression that would've made his chest clench had he still had space in him to waste time with such things. Puffy looked around for a moment turning around and scanning all sides, her ears drooping as she saw nothing.

He didn't care. He _didn't_.

He held the flowers in his hand a bit tighter as his jaw clenched. His fingers curling into the white, blue, and green of the delicate plants.

He didn't care.

"Puffy?" Niki's voice rang out.

Puffy's face lit up again as she pushed into the store, the door swinging close behind her, sealing her inside that space of warmth and sweet scent. Dream pressed the flowers against his chest and took a breath.

He didn't care

  


_"Shh, don't cry... you're gonna be okay."_

_"Why!? Why do they hate me!?"_

_"Because they're stupid, that's why. Come here little guy let's fix you up- "_

_"It's... it's me... it's my face... it's this -"_

_"No, no Dream. Don't listen to them. You're perfect. You're fine -"_

_"I'm a FREAK!"_

_"Please, Dream -"_

_"LEAVE ME ALONE!"_

  


Dream dropped the flowers. They landed somewhere beneath the tree he was perched in and he felt no less without them. His chest was still empty and that left him feeling peaceful. He forced those memories back and felt a smile light up the face under his mask.

He didn't care.

Like a shadow he drifted his way back on course, slipping through the Badlands and across the plains before coming upon the familiar dark building that looked quite fearsome in the growing purples of the dawn.

He stood there for a while, hands in his cloak as he watched the prison grow brighter and brighter as the sun slipped up over the horizon.

Quite a brilliant little building, it still was somewhat amazing what a man like Sam could do with the right motivation. If Dream could still feel fear, he'd be intimidated by the walls of black stone.

"Dream?" Sam's voice stirred Dream out of his contemplation. He turned and saw Sam making his way towards the prison with a load of tools in his hands and strapped to his belt.

"Hello, Sam," Dream greeted cordially.

"What are you doing out here?" Sam asked slowly. The creeper hybrid tilted his head a bit, a small hiss escaping his lips as he approached. His golden plate armor shone radiantly in the sunlight but his eyes flickered with that usual emotion of confusion that Dream seemed to instill in everyone.

"Just came to - to check on the progress and all that," Dream sighed gesturing at the structure.

Sam looked rather proud, as he should.

"And... I'd like to pay you for... well, I need another commission," Dream smiled, of course, even though Sam couldn't see it.

"Another one? I'm... well I'm not done yet and - "

"It's a minor one," Dream assured him. He pulled out Tubbo's compass and held it out. Sam took it gently, studying the dented metal and shaking it near his ear.

"This... uh... what happened to it?" Sam laughed.

"It's gone through some... trouble. Can you fix it?" Dream asked.

Sam took a few moments to study it, his gloved finger brushed out some of the broken glass from the compass face. A wry smile came to his lips making his somewhat green-tinted skin ripple like the surface of a pond and his golden-flecked eyes sparkle.

"Yeah, yeah I can do something with this. The Redstone mechanism is still intact and the enchantment isn't harmed - it's just been beaten up and has a messed-up calibration. Would take me a while, it's a delicate sort of thing... and I may have to take a break from that." Sam gestured to the prison.

Dream nodded and let out a contemplative hum. The prison could wait. It was nearly finished and every room Dream needed was ready to hold someone... Tommy was more important than the building anyway.

"Put a hold on the prison, this is important," Dream ordered.

Sam nodded, taking a moment to turn the compass over in his hands.

"There's an engraving on here, it's been worn away but I could probably - " Sam began.

"That would be great," Dream cut Sam off before he could question it further. "It's Tubbo's compass and I think he'd appreciate that."

"Oh," Sam nodded, his face growing solemn. "Poor kid."

It seemed the entire world had heard about Tommy's "death" and Tubbo's troubles. Dream sighed a bit and shook his head.

"It's a shame," he muttered; A shame that it was so easy. Tubbo didn't question it, didn't think to question it. Didn't think that Dream was capable of faking one of Tommy's fits of destruction and setting the stage to look like the boy's final hurrah. Tubbo was naive, so easily malleable... because he was, well... he was only a child...

_"Children don't belong in strife, Cornelius."_

No... no, they didn't. But here Dream was, with children who thought themselves soldiers and men who thought themselves gods. All these years later and Cat's words still stuck him as meaningful... painfully true and honest.

"Yeah... Poor Tommy," Sam sighed, he seemed to grow a bit unsteady at the thought of the boy, but the tall man quickly regained himself and nodded, rubbing his eyes and letting out a long breath.

"So... When can you get this back to me?" Dream asked.

"This? Uh - uh, a week maybe," Sam answered quickly.

"Wonderful," Dream nodded. He reached under his cloak and felt the weight of hefty payment that lay strapped to his side. He pulled out a pouch and handed it to Sam who took it, experimenting with its weight and peering inside.

"You sure, Dream, it's just compass?" Sam laughed nervously as he took the bag of diamonds.

"Think of it as a rush job. I'll need this done in a day or two."

"Oh." The tall man seemed a little shocked by that announcement. "Yeah... I'll get right on it then."

"Thank you," Dream dismissed, turning to leave the hybrid to his own devices.

"Dream!" Sam called after him, stilling Dream's stride.

Dream hummed as he turned back to Sam, tilting his head quizically.

"If you need anything else done, don't hesitate to ask," Sam smiled.

Dream pondered that for a moment, rolling the words over in his mind like pebbles in the rapids of a river. Did Sam think him... kinder? for paying to fix something of Tubbo's. Was this Sam's way of thanking Dream for helping Tubbo?

If so, the man was a fool.

"Thank you Sam, I'm good though," Dream laughed lightly - people always trusted things that were gentle and light.

With that, he left the hybrid with the compass and disappeared into the woods. The trees hid him from the rising sun, dappling his cloak with changing patterns of leaves and sun. Fallen foliage shifted under his gentle footsteps and damp grass bent under his heel. 

It was silent here; not a complete silence but a natural one, one broken up by shifting leaves and rustling grass as nature breathed her typical song.

Dream paused in a clearing, the warm morning sun melting into the hotter noon as the rays fell upon his mask and cloak. It felt warm on his exposed skin and as he reached up to his mask he felt how warm the material had gotten in the golden rays.

He hesitated... leaving the clearing before his fingers could pull the porcelain off. 

He had work to do.

Off he set again, through the trees that melted into mountains and to the hidden base he kept tucked beneath the earth. He descended the redstone contraption and paced down the long hallway. His footsteps echoed loudly here

Item frames stood at the ready, awaiting their allotted items. Each frame delicately carved and ready to hold the keys to the future. Dream's fingers slid along the dark stone, drifting just under the item frames much like his mind drifted.

He'd have the compass soon... he'd find Tommy.

He'd find Tommy and make sure the boy couldn't get away until he was perfect. He would have angry, vicious, insubordinate little Tommy coming like a good dog to his beckoned call. After that, it would be easy...

He'd show Tommy the truth. The cold unspoken truth that all worlds shared. The boy would be scared - Dream had been scared when he first learned it, but Tommy would be alright - he'd have Dream and Dream would help him. He'd teach him, train him, give him everything he'd ever need until Tommy was... until Tommy was perfect.

Tommy would understand - he'd have to understand by that point.

He'd understand Dream and what Dream did and why he did it and they'd do it together. They'd accomplish what Dream couldn't do alone...

Tommy would understand...

Dream slammed the side of his fist into the wall, forcing himself out of the thought.

_Focus._

_One step at a time._

_Focus!_

It was these foolish daydreams that caused him to waste precious time.

Dream pulled his hand back and shook it, cursing himself as forced his anger back down. This was getting out of hand now - if he couldn't keep that emotion down he'd put himself in danger...

Maybe... maybe it was time...

Dream froze.

He'd been walking down the hall, holding his somewhat jarred hand. He'd froze as something in the corner of his eyes caught his attention.

The item frames weren't all void. There were weapons and aspects pinned to them like pretty little butterflies on a corkboard. One of Dream's favorite pinned butterflies were the gray thick wings that Philza had given him without a fight. A surrendered treasure that had long been one of the best-won prizes of Dream's collection...

Philza's wings were now gone.

Dream walked over to the empty item frame, his breaths growing short and heavy as the anger in him began to broil. He reached out and pressed his hands on the glass that those gorgeous feathery appendages should be trapped behind and felt himself shake.

Where were they?

_Where were they!?_

_Who had TAKEN THEM!?_

His fist broke through the glass, shattering it and filling his hand and wrist with glass shards that dug into his skin like angry teeth. Blood bubbled out of his wounds and dripped down his arm like little trickles, reminding him that he still bled... even if it wasn't crimson.

Even if his blood was as black as ender dragon scales and dark as he feared his soul was, he was still human. 

A whimper escaped his lips as the anger threatened to overflow. It pumped and ebbed like a vicious tide taking Dream with it as ancient memories resurfaced. He clenched his bloodied fist and fell to his knees as he tried to force it down. 

This was the straw that broke his resolve!? THIS!?

He would _not_ falter to emotion. He would not he would not he would not.

  


_"Freak!" the children screamed as they punched him into the dirt. "You can't hide behind your magic!"_

_His visual enchantment flickered as they punched him again and he saw them all recoil as his true face came to view. He felt anger fill his blood as they looked at him like he was some monster. Anger filled his head, his chest, his fist, his heart until he was pinning them to the ground and hitting them again and again and again through tears mixing with his own blood because why was he like this and why couldn't he be different and why did he give in to his anger so easily? Why why **why**?_

  


He dug his other hand into his wounds to pull out the glass as viciously as possible. He hissed and clenched his jaw as he spilled more of his dark blood that stained his cloak. The pain pulled tears to his eyes but it didn't get rid of the anger - 

Why couldn't he get rid of it!?

  


_He couldn't save anyone. He was on his knees cradling the broken body of the only person who'd ever been kind to a monster child like him like she had all those other times. He couldn't save anyone, not even her... the village was burning. He was crying and sobbing as he begged her to wake up but after that wave came all he felt was rage because the only person he cared about was gone and it was all their fault and... all their fault, all their fault..._

_The raiders were still setting fire to the village when he walked out with an ax in hand. He was more than a child now - not a man, but more than a child._

_All their fault all their fault all their fault -_

_He laughed as he tore them apart._

  


Dream was running now. He could feel the anger in the back of his throat, it tore at him like a monster and he wasn't going to survive.

He had to get to the chest - he had to get to the chest.

The anger had to go - he couldn't live with his rage anymore! This anger, this emotion, this was what had scared Tommy away, this was what Philza had manipulated, this emotion was why Dream was failing.

He couldn't keep it. He didn't want to keep it.

  


_He raged as he looked at the execution stand. He had lived so many lives and none of them had brought him rage like this. None of them had hurt him like this. Perhaps his first life had brought him such anger when they had killed the only thing akin to a mother he had ever had... but this was different. This was empty anger, not at someone but at **everyone**. He fell to his knees before the execution stand and screamed, a raw and terrible scream, a scream that ripped through the sky as he thought of the innocent man dead... the innocent... Catboy had been innocent... Cat... Cat..._

_Robin. Cat. Robin. Cat._

_A bright smiling boy. Happy child with a handful of flowers and a missing tooth._

_Soft distant blind eyes that looked at him warmly as those gentle hands slipped in his own. A peaceful, kind man._

_Cat. Robin. Cat. Robin._

_Rage._

__  


Dream fell to his knees, his hands flying to his mask.

He needed it out. He needed the anger gone.

His fingers pried against his mask, trying to tear it away. It clung to his face like the second skin it was supposed to be and Dream breathed heavily as he squeezed his eyes closed and pulled.

It was like tearing his face off, bit by bit in slow torture. His fingers pried at his mask, their callused fingertips finally latching onto something before pulling and pulling until something snapped and Dream could breathe.

He knelt there, stunned for a moment. His entire body shook like a leaf in a gale but he felt stronger now... the anger was still there but he could stomp it down like the distraction it was.

In his hands sat a porcelain mask... but not the one that smiled. No, his normal one still lay safe on his face, still concealing him from the world.

The one in his hands had narrowed eyes and a scowl painted on the bleached surface. His anger...

Dream took a shaky breath and forced himself to stand, holding the physical manifestation of his anger in his bloodied hand.

It was gone now. It was all gone now. His chest felt empty but it was freeing. He felt so incredibly peaceful as he regarded the mask coldly. There were no more distractions from his plans, no more threads someone could pull or manipulate.

He was only a mask now.

Good.

He found his resolve and strode to a wall that he swiftly broke down to reveal a rock of obsidian. He broke the rock apart to reach the single chest laying hidden in the shadows, surrounded on three sides by bedrock, it's surface dusty and unused.

The sight of that chest made him hesitate for a moment.

All of his emotions - all of them, locked into one small little wooden box. The mere sight of it made his throat close as he sensed all of them trying to find their master - trying to chain him back down.

He crouched down and lifted the lid, oh so slowly.

Sadness screamed to be remembered. Guilt and Remorse begged to be let out. Empathy demanded freedom. Happiness pleaded. Hatred called. Affection sobbed. Envy, Fear, Gratefulness, Pride... all of them called to him as Dream lifted the lid and looked in at the many porcelain masks that lay on the interior, all of their faces looking up at him.

"I hope you're not about to do the stupid thing I think you're about to do."

Dream slammed the box shut and whirled around to find -

Drista!?

Drista... standing a few feet away... eating a bowl of soup... with a fork.

"'Sup," Drista greeted.

"Drista," Dream breathed.

"What'chya got there?" Drista asked, a smile on her face as she took another bite.

Dream clenched his anger, holding the mask close as he narrowed his eyes.

"What are you doing here, Drista?" Dream demanded coldly.

"First of all, ouch, love you too. Second of all, you were supposed to say ' _a smoothie_ ' so that the joke was funny but you ruined it, man. You ruined it."

"How did you get here?" Dream felt anger trying to bubble its way back up his throat but he was easily able to push it back down now that it was outside of him.

"Just... happened upon it," Drista shrugged as she stuffed a fork-full of food into her mouth.

The pieces clicked together for Dream very rapidly.

"You took Philza's wings," Dream accused.

Drista shrugged. "Yeah... maybe. Look, bro, if you don't want me to have things, don't leave 'em out."

With that, Drista held up a familiar porcelain mask with an angry expression drawn on it.

Dream froze as he looked down at his hand that now held an empty bowl that still smelled like soup. He dropped the wooden bowl and slowly looked to Drista.

She'd switched them... when... how?

"Give it back," Dream hissed.

"Yeahhhh, no," Drista laughed as she tossed the mask into the air and caught it.

" _Now_ Drista!" Dream ordered. Anger was creeping up his throat again and he was struggling to swallow it - the emotion had to go in the box!

"So what? You can shove it all down and pretend it's all okay?" Drista taunted.

Dream flexed his hand so that his ax appeared in his grip.

"Ohh, scary blob boi has an ax, what will he do?" Drista laughed.

Dream charged.

He needed that mask back. If Drista stole it, or heaven forbid _kept it_ -

"Too slow!" Drista taunted as she ducked under the blow and - 

And STABBED him in the mask with her fork. He hissed as he stumbled back, tearing the utensil out of his mask angrily while Drista's giggles filled the room around him.

"Drista!" Dream cried as he whirled around to find her standing there.

"What? You want this?" Drista taunted as she spun the mask around. "Come get it."

Dream did so gladly. He relied on lives of training as he launched at Drista. He swung his ax for her legs, her arms, anything that would damage but not kill. Drista was immortal regardless but hitting anything vital would hardly slow her down. It was not because there was something in him that didn't want to see Drista bleed or panic or -

"DRISTA!" he demanded as she avoided his ax blows, and leaped over him once more, her hands ghosting over his mask before completely yanking it off.

Dream stumbled, shocked.

His... his mask shouldn't be able to... it shouldn't...

It was Drista, of course, she could do the unthinkable and achieved the impossible. She'd taken off his mask, the thing he thought was untouchable.

He slowly turned to face Drista, taking a long breath. The girl had landed right beside his secret chest. She tossed his smiley mask away and put a hand on her hip as she regarded his exposed expression.

"Really?" Drista sighed as she looked him up and down, her eyes settling on his face. "That's like, another mask under a mask."

Dream reached up and felt his face. His skin was cool to the touch, hidden within the glamour enchantment that made him look... human. Drista's mouth was curled into a frown and with no grace whatsoever, she raised her hand, summoned an ax, and slammed it into the hidden wooden chest at her side.

Dream crumpled.

He fell to his knees as the crack in the chest leaked all of the worst emotions he had tried to lock away.

"Bro. You do this every time. You can't hide from this stuff!" Drista scolded but she sounded so distant now.

Guilt racked his chest - he had to force it away. Sadness choked him - he had to swallow it. Wrath and Hopelessness clutched him mercilessly but he wouldn't, he _couldn't_ let it consume in.

"Give it back," Dream rasped as he pushed himself back up and gripped the ax. He felt his glamour enchantment flickering as he struggled to hold back those annoying calls of his emotion.

Drista looked at the mask in her hands, her knuckles turning white as she gripped it.

"Why? What are you going to do with it?" she demanded, her mirthful tone was gone and in its place was something cold and... hurt?

"It needs... it needs to go in the box," Dream struggled. "I can't... I can't live with it."

"So... what? You want to be an empty shell? You want to just shove it away like - like some - I mean don't you remember what happened last time!?"

"I CAN'T Drista!" Dream hissed. Drista hesitated for a moment. "I can't live like this," he hated how his voice wavered. He felt fear trying to hold him and he tried to push it back.

"If I don't put it all away, I'll never be able to reach my goal - " Dream began shakily.

"You want to be a fucking psycho? huh? An emotionless walking corpse who does whatever the hell he needs to do to get shit done which just gives you an excuse to do fucked up stuff!?" Drista yelled in retort.

"IF I DON'T MAKE THEM FIND PEACE I'LL DIE!" Dream yelled. He froze as soon as the confession left his lips.

No, no, _no_. He could not be this weak to emotion. He couldn't be this bad. He cursed himself as he felt warm tears run down his face... the tears broke his mirage. He glanced over to Drista who's frown had grown taunt as she saw his true face.

Gods he felt so broken with all these emotions trying to get back in his head.

"The corruption," his voice shook as he tried to regain composure. "Drista, you know my oath. I swore, _I swore_ that I'd protect and keep the peace over my world. I've failed... and if I don't make them all fucking get along... Drista that's not an option."

"You expect me to believe that if I don't put this mask in a box you're going to perma-die?" Drista scowled.

"I have to make them get along, I have to make this world peaceful. Those... those things - " he pointed at the mask in Drista's hands " - make me weak. I either... I have to... I need the strength to do what needs to be done or this world will end... it will end in death. I'll reach peace one way or another way, Drista, and I can't... I don't want to kill them."

"Then don't!" Drista cried. "You act like your only options are - "

"Those are the only options, Drista!" Dream cried desperately. "Either I make them get along, I kill them all, or I die permanently! Peace needs to be reached and I am the _only_ one who can do what needs to be done."

Drista's frown seemed permanent now. She glared at Dream, or he could assume she was glaring under her own smiling circular mask.

"You know... that's what you said after Robin," she murmured.

Dream felt like he'd been slapped.

_"I am the only one who can do what needs to be done!"_

_"Dream... I mean... sure... but you're talking about - I mean this is genocide, I'll be real with you, bro."_

_"Good. This is the only way this world will ever find peace..."_

"Don't..." his voice shook... he wasn't begging, he _wasn't_.

"Last time we were here, I watched you put your final emotion in a stupid box because you told me it was the only way you'd survive. You told me that you were going to fucking die if you didn't get revenge for that stupid kid and Catboy - "

"DON'T!" Dream screamed.

" - AND WHAT HAPPENED DREAM!?" Drista challenged. "WHAT HAPPENED? YOU MURDERED AN ENTIRE FUCKING WORLD AND THEN DIED ANYWAY!"

"It wasn't the corruption that killed me... I... I just- " Dream's argument was flimsy at best but he... he couldn't...

__

_"I'm with you, Cornelius. I'm not leaving."_

He was crying. He couldn't do this. He hated this!!

"I'm not letting you do that again," Drista breathed. She held up his mask of anger and Dream knew she was glaring at him. "Find peace some other way, but don't you ever lose yourself to this dumb shit, not again."

"Please, Drista," he begged. He hated begging. He hated this. He wanted to seal that hole in the wooden chest and stop the things that were tearing at his actual chest made of flesh and blood.

"No," Drista scowled. "You made an oath, now keep it. _You_ keep it. Don't turn into whatever psycho shell you try and make yourself into when this kind of shit happens to keep your oath."

Dream felt all sorts of emotions tumble through him, the most prevalent being desperation and anger.

He needed that mask. He needed it!

He lunged. His ax was left somewhere on the floor and he had no weapons, he lunged with only his hands, ready to tackle Drista and pin her to the ground.

Drista tapped her foot and Dream found himself slamming into a mirror.

Damn her. Damn her and all her god-like powers.

Dream stumbled backward, falling on the ground as the mirror shattered into hundreds of pieces that fell to his feet.

Drista's cold laugh filled the room as it grew further and further away.

"Look at yourself, Dream," she instructed distantly. "You piece of shit."

And with that, she was gone. Dream knew she was gone, he could sense it. She'd left with his physical anger and she wasn't coming back.

He'd lost... he'd lost.

Dream's hands were shaking as he pushed himself up. He glanced at the shattered mirror and froze.

There was no mirage to hide his face now as it's shattered reflection looked back at him.

Nothing to hide the green eyes that glowed too brightly as tears dripped down his face or the permanent smile that was far too wide on his face despite how his lip was trembling. Nothing to hide the teeth or the scars or the... the monstrous form of it all.

Dream looked to the ground and found that same reflection thousand of times over in the bits of shattered glass strewn on the floor, each one showcasing just another detail that made Dream want to curl in on himself and cry. His eyes, his high cheekbones, his gaunt face, his smile, his smile, _his smile_ -

He scrambled over to where Drista had been and frantically picked up his smiley mask that still had a hole from Drista's fork. He pressed it desperately to his face like it was a lifeline - like it was the only thing keeping him in one piece...

And it was...

Dream sobbed. He cursed himself and pressed the mask firmly against his face as if he could stem the tears.

No. No. No. NO!

He would not fail like this! He would not! He couldn't! He...

Dream frantically fell over himself as he ran over to the chest, desperately avoiding making eye contact with any of the mirror shards even if he had covered his face again. He reached the chest and viciously pulled Drista's ax out of it, sending splinters flying. He ruthlessly pulled out wooden planks from his space pocket and began nailing them on the chest to cover the hole in the chest like a desperate patch on a torn coat. He panted as he closed the hole, the emotions in his chest fading as he blocked them back in the wood.

It was fine now. The patchwork job he'd done on the chest was working.

There was no more pain in his chest. He was empty again... he was at peace again.

There was still a bubble of anger. A simmering presence in the back of his mind that told him that it wasn't locked safely away, that it was out in the open, in the world...

Damn Drista.

Dream took a breath and forced the anger down.

He was fine - he could force the anger away when it came up. It wasn't in him anymore, he could handle it.

Dream coldly looked at the mirror shards thrown all over the floor and the shattered mirror sitting solitary in the room. He walked away from it, holding his injured hand that still bled from where he had punched the glass.

So...

He had to think...

Philza had his wings back. That could prove difficult but could also be used as an advantage - Philza was breaking rules having those wings but that made him a public enemy... He also couldn't hide as well.

That was fine. He could handle Philza having his wings.

Drista had his mask of anger. That was also fine. He'd be alright... he'd be _fine_...

He could handle it...

He was fine...

He composed himself and walked away from the mess that he'd have to pick up later. Later... he told himself, later. He had a lot to deal with at the moment. He needed to think...

He needed to breathe...

...

He needed to find Tommy.

~~~

Drista sighed as she wandered around the world.

Where to hide the stupid mask? Where wouldn't Dream look? A stronghold? Nah - he'd definitely look there. The Nether? While the idea of throwing it into a laval pool was tempting, it wouldn't have the effect Drista needed.

Dream needed to learn.

He was so scared of his emotions corrupting him... let's see what happened when he realized his stupid actions could corrupt his precious stupid world and its peace.

Close... She'd leave it close to Dream.

Close to home. Close to all that stupid shit that he was so desperate to stop caring about. Close to the people he refused to acknowledge as important to him.

Close to Dream's fucking heart...

'Cause if he even had one of those anymore, it wasn't in his chest, it was in this stupid world.

She found a nice little corner in the back of a dark mine and tucked the mask in it.

Close to Dream. Close to everyone.

Let it corrupt the world. Let Dream learn.

He wouldn't die. She'd make sure - but he'd learn...

He'd learn.

As Drista watched the mask shudder under her touch she couldn't help but sigh. She didn't want it to go this far - she didn't. But it happened and it needed to happen.

The corruption rooted well enough, the mask sinking into the stone and spreading out scarlet roots that dug into the earth like bloody scars. Drista hummed and left it to grow.

Left it to fester.

Just like how Dream left everything else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me to myself: Do NOT make Dream Out Of Character, don't make him ooc, don't make him ooc-  
> Me: *Makes a tragic ooc Dream*  
> Me: DAMMIT!
> 
> Anyway, look at all that Dream backstory that I'm going to use in future chapters... Look at the Mad Village I threw in...  
> Oh, it's beautiful...  
> So much suffering in the future...  
> Haha


	10. Broken Little Things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ranboo has a crisis or two, Ghostbur is too precious for this world, Philza just wants his kids to be okay -  
> Tommy would like to stop being broken thank you very much, he is quite done with having trauma.  
> Ding dong - who is it? Plot? Nah. Not here.

Ranboo shuddered as he cowered in the small cave, hugging himself as he gazed into the torrent of rain... well, it was more like sleet at this point, somewhere between ice and rain. The wind was chill and sent shivers up and down Ranboo's spine. His umbrella lay off to the side, a few ribs snapped off the metal shaft leaving the canopy looking more like a dead bat strewn on the floor than the neat little folded piece of protection it had been at the beginning of the journey.

Ranbo hugged his knees as he rocked himself, his flickering torch offered some light in the terrible darkness. He had hoped the storm would pass, but it only seemed to worsen as time went on. He forced himself to breath, _deep breath in, deep breath out_ , if only to keep him conscious. The rain was relentless as it slammed into the stone at the mouth of the cave, freezing almost instantly as it hit the freezing earth. Ranboo's breath danced around him like a cloud as he tried to control his breathing.

He...

He wasn't lost... he wasn't... he wasn't.. _he wasn't_.

Ranboo held his head as a whimper emerged from his throat. He could remember - he could remember and find his way home. He wasn't lost - he... he just had to remember!

Why had he left L'Manburg alone? Why? He couldn't' remember.

His nails dug into his scalp as he shuddered, unsure of so much. He couldn't remember where he was or why he was here or where he was going...

He had been looking for someone... Who?

_Deep breath in. Deep breath out._

Ranboo reached under his heavy black chest plate and into his suit where his memory book sat safely tucked in his pocket. Its pages were damp and its cover was a bit soft from all the rain he'd trekked through.

Why had he done that? His skin still tingled from the humidity and he had burns on his skin from where rain had slipped through his armor and brushed against his skin like fiery tears. Why had he gone out in the rain?

Why - he hated the rain, he _knew_ he hated the rain, so why did he...

Why did he leave L'Manburg!?

He ripped through the pages of his memory book, desperately searching for a clue as to why he was out here. Surely he had written it down - he wrote down everything - he _should_ have written it down! Why, _why_ was it blank!! Why didn't it have ANYTHING!?

_Breathe in. Breathe out._

He had to think - _think_ , why had he left L'Manburg?

Tommy... Tommy, it had something to do with Tommy. No, that must be wrong... Tommy was exiled, why would he...

Dream... Tubbo... Dream had said something to Tubbo - what had he said? What had he said?

He clenched his hair in his claws and pulled - he tried to pull it all out, pull the memories back from wherever they went. He needed to remember - he needed to remember!!

Something stung his cheeks making him yelp and scramble back. He pressed a trembling claw to his cheeks and felt the burns his tears were leaving in their wake. He quickly wiped his eyes and forced himself to take deeper breaths.

He wanted to go home. He wanted to curl up in bed with Jjjjjjeffery or Enderchest, he wanted to be in a warm home instead of a cold cave, he wanted to be nice and dry... not of painfully damp, he wanted to be happy... not... not sad.

Why was he sad?

Ranboo looked up as he tried to blink the tears away. There was a memory there, something pressing in the back of his mind.

Tommy... Tommy... Tommy and Dream... Tommy and Tubbo... 

Cold nights as Tubbo hiccuped and sobbed in Ranboo's house because _he was so sorry and he shouldn't have exiled Tommy and what had he done? he was a monster and he'd lost his best friend - he was just as bad as Schlatt._

Ranboo remembered that.

He remembered a beach with gentle waves that lapped the shore and how Tommy didn't look at the waves but at the horizon, with that sad sort of stare, because _no one cares about him and Tubbo hates him and nothing matters anymore except maybe for you Ranboo and you know what, Dream matters a lot too, he's a friend_.

Ranboo hugged his knees tighter to his chest. He definitely remembered that. He remembered Dream's cold voice curling in his ear and a blade to his throat. He remembered Tommy's exile and that sickly sweet tone Dream spoke in as he gently tied his noose tight around Tommy's throat so that the boy never knew - never saw what Dream was doing to him.

" _Let's just keep this between friends_."

Ranboo whimpered and tried to curl even further around himself.

He didn't really want to remember that...

" _Tommy's DEAD_!"

Ranboo slowly released the grip on his knees and looked up in realization as he heard Tubbo's agonized scream in his mind.

That's right... that's right... Tommy was dead. Dream had said Tommy was gone. Tubbo believed him.

Ranboo didn't. Ranboo couldn't believe anything Dream said.

Ranboo took a deep breath and quickly began writing in his journal whose pages were a bit dryer, using a torch as his light.

  


_Dream told Tubbo that Tommy died_

_Did Tommy kill himself?_

_Tubbo thinks Tommy is dead_

_Phil was going to see Tommy yesterday - he left in the morning_

  


Ranboo closed his eyes and tried to remember what he had seen. There had been a pretty red sunrise that morning, the crimson light spilling into the house as the blond-haired man had compiled all sorts of items together. Phil had told him to be careful, to watch out for Dream. He said he was going to go help Tommy.

Ranboo had been happy.

Ranboo quickly scribbled more down.

  


_Philza didn't come back_

_Where is Philza?_

_Where is Tommy?_

  


That was where Ranboo had gone - to Logstedshire. That was where he was. The half-breed adjusted the helmet on his head and risked peeking out of the cave to the plains above his little burrow where, off in the distance, Ranboo could see the foreboding tower far in the distance towering over the trees. Tommy's tower...

  


_Went to Logstedshire - everything is destroyed. There's a tower._

_Did he jump?_

  


Ranbo wrote that last line with shaking hands.

No... no not Tommy. He couldn't - shouldn't have. He... 

Ranboo clutched the book and whimpered. Dream had been... Dream had been so mad. He'd warned Ranboo to stay away and Ranboo hadn't listened. Was this.... was this Ranboo's fault? Had Dream hurt Tommy because Ranboo had visited him? 

Was that what pushed Tommy to this?

  


_What happened to Tommy?_

  


With the final question written down, Ranboo closed his book and huddled in a corner of the cave.

He needed to find Philza. He needed to know what had happened.

Where was Phil? He had said he would be here!

Ranboo held his head and tried to keep himself from crying. He couldn't remember if he was missing anything or if he was supposed to remember something. He couldn't... he couldn't...

The rain continued to patter on the stone at the foot of the cave... like the sky was crying. Everyone seemed to be crying a lot more nowadays.

"Hi Ranboo!" 

Ranboo leaped to his feet and drew his sword, a shriek of terror on his lips as his cells contorted in an attempt to escape.

Grey skin. Yellow sweater. Happy smile. Fingers stained with blue dye.

"Ghostbur?" Ranboo's voice was rough and glitching like the rest of him as his mind put together the pieces in front of him, compiling them all into memory as Ranboo forced himself to relax.

The ghost's face lit up in a happy face as he drifted closer to Ranboo.

"Hi Ranboo! Take some blue," the ghost gently pressed some blue dye into Ranboo's hands and looked at the half-breed with that strange softness that he always held in those brownish-grey eyes.

"Hi... Ghostbur," Ranboo rasped, feeling himself calm down a bit. He sheathed his sword and sat back down, still trembling from the cold and the fright. "What... what are doing here?"

"Well... see it's kind of hard to remember. I... I'm not supposed to see Tommy - cause he's angry at me and all - but I sort of got lost and I've been - Ranboo, I've been in the wilderness!"

He sounded so proud of that fact.

"The... wilderness?" 

"Yeah!"

"Why - why were you out there? Ghostbur you've been gone for WEEKS!"

Ghostbur laughed, it was a happy lilting laugh, something akin to small bells in the wind or the song of a bird. His voice and laugh always seemed musical and brought some warmth to Ranboo's chest - though the warmth was useless in the current chilly atmosphere.

"You seem stressed, Ranboo, do you need more blue?"

"Ghostbur, _please_ , why..."

Ranboo's voice died down as he was handed more blue dye by the ghost who was looking at him eagerly.

"Take more blue," Ghostbur whispered, acting like it was some harmless secret shared between friends.

Ranboo clenched the blue and held it to his chest. Ghostbur had left - he'd chosen to leave? He was okay... Ranboo had been worried. But now - not the fact that Ghostbur was alright only seemed to carve Ranboo's heart apart because if Ghostbur was alright then he had _left_ Tommy alone with _Dream_!

"Ghostbur, _where_ have you been? Why did you leave!?"

"Oh! Well, I was making invitations for Tommy's party!" Ghostbur began happily. "I started delivering them when Dream came over and started helping - he's very nice, Dream I mean. Anyway, he was helping me deliver the letters when he told me that Tommy wasn't very happy with me - and - and well... Tommy doesn't really like me here sometimes..."

Wilbur seemed to droop at that thought, he clenched the blue in his hands that grew a darker shade of indigo before he shook his head and put on another smile.

"Tommy doesn't like you?" Ranboo breathed.

"Oh, only sometimes. Only when he thinks I'm Wilbur - or when he misses Wilbur... you know, it's very confusing sometimes," Ghostbur pondered.

"Okay - okay forget that, what about Dream. What did Dream tell you to do?" 

"Oh! He said I should go travel for a bit, just until Tommy calmed down. He sent me out in a very nice direction and told me he'd come to get me when Tommy felt better!"

Ranboo felt his chest clench. Ghostbur hadn't left Tommy alone - it had been Dream. Dream... Dream _must've_ lied, he must've. He had tried to kill - 

"And I went on for a bit - but then it started raining just a little while after I left L'Manburg" Ghostbur sighed as he floated around the cave. "And... well I don't really like the rain, Ranboo - I melt, you know."

"Yeah... I feel that" Ranboo chuckled dryly, his throat closing more with each passing second, the reality of the situation falling on him.

Did Dream know it was going to rain? Had... had he tried to _kill_ Ghostbur? Was that possible?

"So anyway, I had to hide from the rain - and then I found this lovely snowy place but there was a house there, and I figured to myself ' _Dream probably wouldn't find me if I hid in a house_ ' and he was very insistent on the ' _wandering_ ' part so I left it there - and then - OH RANBOO! Ranboo, I found _Friend_!!"

"What?" Ranboo asked.

Ghostbur drifted over to the mouth of the cave and cupped his mouth.

"Friend!! Friend!! Over here!" he called in a strange sort of stage-whisper.

There was a pitter-patter of stones falling from above as a blue-dyed sheep followed the call and wandered into the cave, coming right to Wilbur's hand and nuzzling it before moving over to Ranboo, its coat of wool heavy from the rain.

"This is Friend!" Ghostbur smiled proudly.

"...Hello, nice to meet you," Ranboo greeted awkwardly as he avoided eye contact with the fuzzy animal.

The sheep let out a small sort of bleat before moving close to the torch and settling down to dry off and sleep.

"Yeah! I found Friend," Wilbur smiled, sounding over the moon as he showed off his new companion. "They were just hanging out in the snowy place - it's so much easier to dodge snowflakes than it is to dodge raindrops you know - right near that nice cottage."

"Do you know who's cottage?" Ranboo asked.

"Hmm? Oh. No. Why?"

Ranboo bit his lip.

"I'm looking for Tommy, Ghostbur... Have you - "

"I was looking for Tommy TOO!" Ghostbur smiled. "I came back to try and see if he was feeling any better and found Logestshire all... well all blown up. It's quite sad. Where'd he go?"

"I don't know..." Ranboo murmured. "I don't know..."

"Well, why don't we start asking people!" Ghostbur smiled.

"Like who, Ghostbur?" Ranboo didn't mean to sound so cold but...

He held his knees closer and put a claw in his hair, pulling on his strands as he tried to come to terms with all of this.

Maybe... maybe Tommy _was_ dead. Maybe...

"Tubbo should know, I gave him a compass that leads to - "

"Tubbo doesn't know," Ranboo snapped. No, no he shouldn't snap at Ghostbur. This wasn't Ghostbur's fault, this wasn't anyone's fault - No - it was Dream's fault. It had to be Dream's fault!

"Oh... Dream then, Dream should know!"

"Dream is... Dream doesn't know," Ranboo answered in a small voice as he thought of the cold smiley face. He could almost feel a cold blade pressing on his neck.

"Hmm... then we should ask anyone nearby! Maybe they saw where Tommy went!" Ghostbur smiled as he floated over to Friend and began running his grey fingers stained with blue through the indigo wool.

"...Maybe..."

"We can ask the people in that cottage up North - it was pretty close!" Ghostbur chirped.

Ranboo looked at him slowly and considered it. He didn't know too many people out of L'Manburg and... and the ones he knew of weren't supposedly nice people.

"Let's do that!" Ghostbur cheered. "We'll head out as soon as the rain stops!!"

Ranboo sighed and slowly looked up to the rain that was still slamming down from above a few feet away.

"Okay," he answered in a small sort of voice.

Ghostbur smiled.

"Lads on tour," the ghost breathed in a happy sort of whisper. Ranboo only hid his head in his knees.

He didn't want to despair... he didn't... he didn't...

There was still hope - he had to hold on to that hope. He had to be certain. If there was a chance Tommy was still out there, he had to find it.

He had to stay hopeful.

~~~

Philza had many more promises, both spoken and unspoken ones, since Tommy had arrived.

He promised aloud to keep Tommy safe and he reminded the boy of that every time he could. He repeated it over and over again like a mantra when the boy was in his arms. He promised he'd never leave Tommy again. He knew it was foolish to promise things out of his control but he also knew that the doubt flickering in Tommy's eyes was worse than any death Philza could ever suffer - so he promised aloud he wouldn't leave, even when neither of them could fully believe it.

But the quiet promises, the ones that never left Philza's lips, those were the ones that weighed heaviest on Philza's shoulders (heavier than his newly returned wings).

The unspoken promise that he would never, in his life, remind the boy of the begs and pleas that Tommy has whispered to him as they stayed hidden in that half-basement while Dream strode around untouched upstairs. He'd never tell anyone how hurt the boy had been. He'd never let anyone else ever know of that vulnerability.

There was the unspoken promise that Philza would never give Tommy reason to flinch away from his touch.

The promise that, no matter the consequence, when Tommy clung to him like a lifeline Philza would never let go.

Philza found himself having to make more internal promises as the hours dragged by. He couldn't sleep - not when every gust of wind was Dream coming for Tommy. Not when the monsters shrieking outside sounded like a pained shout from Techno when he was ambushed. Not when Philza's hands couldn't seem to stop clenching the sword handle of the blade he slept beside.

He promised that if Dream came back, he'd protect Tommy.

He'd kill that fucker.

From the sound of it, Tommy couldn't sleep either. The boy tossed and turned restlessly for hours, sometimes settling down for a while before gasping away, pursued by some memory or... dream, both the subconscious one or the memory of the man.

Philza could lay still. He could lay there as sleep evaded him and pretend that he wasn't disturbed by the thought of their earlier visitor. He could listen to Tommy's silent struggle and wonder if he should acknowledge it. He could sit and wait without making a sound like a predator lying in wait.

But, when the front door was opened and Tommy swallowed another scream, Philza didn't hesitate to show just how awake and alert he had been. His sword was drawn and aimed to decapitate whatever sorry creature climbed up the ladder, his wings splaying behind him to hide Tommy from view.

"Who's there!?" he demanded, tensing as he prepared for the silky voice or the porcelain mask.

"Just me." Techno's response was monotone and grating. While it was a relief to Phil that Techno was back, he also knew that tone and it took a lot to push down the surge of worry that consumed him. Techno had been out for _hours_ , but he was back now.

It was Dream, it was Techno. It wasn't Dream, it wasn't Dream, it wasn't...

Phil looked back at Tommy's whose eyes were wide in fear.

"It's just Techno," Philza soothed gently, re-sheathing his sword and strapping the casing back to his belt.

"Uh... yeah... right... I wasn't - you know... Goodnight," Tommy stopped trying to deny his fear and instead quickly hid his face from Philza's view and pulled the covers closer around him. 

Phil was torn.

Comfort Tommy... or Techno? Did Tommy want his comfort? Did Techno need it?

In one hand was a boy terrified of everything that moved too quickly, a boy who hated Philza and needed him. In the other hand was a boy who always had needed Phil but had never reached out unless it was too late.

Which one should be comforted first?

Damn indecision.

Philza took a step towards Tommy's bed and saw how the boil curled further around him as his shadow fell over his resting place.

Philza carefully backed away and retreated down the ladder.

"Call if you need anything," he breathed.

Tommy said nothing and Phil wasn't sure if that should make him worried or not. Still, he made another silent promise: to never tell anyone of the nightly demons that haunted Tommy and to never abandon him needlessly in the night. He would be there should Tommy ever need him to be.

Philza landed lightly on the lower floor and found Techno sitting by the fire, near Edward, the two of them gazing into the crackling flames as Techno cleaned layers of new blood off of his blade.

"Hey Techno," Phil greeted...

Techno huffed in response.

Techno was in his pig-like form. His snout was covered in frosty crystals and his long pink hair hung messily and loose behind his head like a mane, remnants of monster blood and snow caked in it. His hands were larger, covered with a thin layer of pink fur that was also caked with the remnants of Techno's night-time spree.

"How you doin' mate?" Phil asked gently as he came up and sat down on a nearby chest. He scanned Techno's figure for wounds, any blood that wasn't the residue of a fallen foe.

"Fine, I guess," Techno muttered as he turned his blade over and began to clean the other side.

Philza searched Techno's blood-red eyes for any insight into what the blood-lord was thinking. There was... pain. There was always pain in those eyes but it was fresh now, much like newly-spilled blood it was raw and warm. 

"You want to talk about it?" Philza asked gently as he reached out and began to comb through Techno's thick locks. He'd need a brush to make any real dent in the pink mane, but this had been their ritual.

Techno would get emotional, he'd deal with it in the most Technoblade way possible, and he'd come home for Phil to try and pick up the pieces. Usually, the picking up of pieces was done while Phil took those wild pink locks and tamed them into a braid.

Technoblade was a strange one, and Philza loved him so dearly for it... because despite all his edges and thorns, all the things that pushed people away and chased their fear like a hungry predator, Techno was only human. He still felt and hurt and suffered like anyone else.

He just never let himself heal. 

Techno pushed his feelings down, drowned them in blood and the screams of his voices. Philza worked through Techno's hair gently prying a knot apart as he thought of all the times he'd sat behind Techno after one of his 'fits'.

" _I'm sorry... I'm sorry... the voices - I didn't. Phil, I'm sorry_."

Philza smiled gently as he picked out a few pine needles from the pink and discarded them on the floor.

Techno believed what everyone told him - that he didn't have emotion, that he shouldn't have emotion. That he was supposed to be untouchable. It made Philza sick.

" _They're so loud... they're too loud..._ "

Techno pulled away from Philza's touch, surprising him as he recoiled.

"Tech?"

"I'm - Look, I'm fine, Phil," Techno dismissed gruffly. "So don't go and worry about me."

"Techno, I'm not worrying - "

"Just - "Techno broke off as he seemed to try and search for the right words. "Just... I'm fine."

Phil opened his mouth to argue - because Techno was _not_ fine. He was very clearly upset and they wouldn't get anywhere with Techno shoving it down like - 

"I'm going to go fix Tommy up some better armor," Techno dismissed as he sheathed his sword, stood up, and moved over to the ladder. "Goodnight, Phil."

That... that was the tone that meant Techno didn't want to talk anymore. That was the " _This conversation is over_ " tone.

Philza always had been good at challenging that tone.

"Mate, you should talk about it," Philza scowled as he stood.

"Goodnight," Techno dismissed gently as he descended the ladder, leaving Philza's emotional stability debating between crying or punching something.

He collapsed in the chair and held his head as he stared into the fire.

So... so broken. Everyone in this house was so fucking messed up - PHIL himself was fucking messed up. He wasn't qualified to help or fix or... hell, he wasn't even qualified to comfort.

What was he supposed to do?

Phil let out a long sigh as he closed his eyes.

What to do... what could he do?

How could he convince Tommy that he was safe?

How could he help Techno learn that he was more than a monster?

How could he help _himself_?

Fuck.

" _You know, Phil, you're not too good with people._ "

Wilbur's little voice rung through Philza's mind pulling a pained smile to his face.

"No... no, I'm not," he breathed.

Wilbur had been good with people - Gods know where he got it from, definitely not Philza. Phil smiled to recall all the times he'd left a village store to find a crowd gathered around his little boy as he preached or sung or riled up the crowd. Maybe it was his siren blood that made him so alluring and appealing... maybe it was his charisma. 

Wilbur had been good with people...

~~~

Tommy agreed with the silence.

As the three of them sat down for breakfast, Tommy appreciated the lack of questions. The way all three had just decided to ignore the bags that sat under all of their eyes. The way Philza's all-seeing eyes kept to themselves and didn't look into Tommy because... 

Because every time Philza looked at him it felt like he was seeing everything Tommy wanted to shove down and forget. It felt like he saw and knew, he _knew_ how Tommy had clung to Dream how he'd begged Dream to stay and how he'd been pathetic and weak and hurt -

"So what's the plan today?" Tommy asked, breaking the silence because anything in the air was better than the shit going on in his head.

He liked the silence. He hated the silence.

He hated questions and stares and pity. He liked voices and laughs.

If he could just pretend it was all okay - it would be so. 

"I... uh, well I was actually going to go mining for netherite," Techno answered. "You know, you need some new gear and all."

Tommy glanced at Techno and noticed how the man avoided his gaze.

What the fuck was up with him? Why was he being nice and -

"Will you be okay going alone?" Philza asked.

Techno gently looked up across the table, not afraid to meet Phil's eyes before giving a small nod.

"Well, what if I want to go?" Tommy challenged, crossing his arms and leaning back in his chair.

Well, now they both looked at him. Right in the eyes. Fuck. Tommy chose to look at Techno instead of Philza. Techno's eyes didn't leave him feeling exposed or vulnerable - they reminded him of rage and anger and...

They made him feel more like Tommy. Like the Tommy who glared at THE Technoblade with no fear. The Tommy who challenged Techno and Schlatt and Dream...

Not the Tommy who cried or found it hard to breathe when he was all alone or -

"I don't know if that's a good idea," Phil murmured. 

"Why not?" Tommy refused to look Phil in the eyes - he wouldn't. He glared at Techno. Techno with his stupid soft face that looked weird covered with scared and those weirdly gentle red eyes and the jewelry on his flappy pig-like ears that peeked out from his messy pink hair. Techno, who looked strangely soft right now when he wasn't covered in blood or wearing a maniacal smile on his tusked face.

Just... Techno...

"He can come," Techno shrugged, tearing away from Tommy's gaze and looking to Phil. "I'll keep him safe."

"Dre- It may not be safe." Philza didn't say the name but he'd meant to and as much as Tommy hated it - as much as he loathed how weak he looked... he couldn't help but tense.

" _I'm here for you, Tommy. I care._ "

Dream was looking for him. He was trying to hunt him down. If he found Tommy... would he kill him? Tommy had left exile and...

But they were friends, so maybe - NO! no. _no_.

Dream was _not_ a friend. Dream was NOT A FRIEND!

"Well, what do you think, Tommy?" Techno asked. "Do you think Dream will be waiting for you in the nether?"

Techno looked back at Tommy and they locked eyes. Techno wasn't hesitant about saying that green bastard's name. Tommy's skin crawled as he watched Techno assess his reaction like he was some experiment or some shit. Tommy wasn't... he wasn't something to watch. Dream did enough of that.

"Fuck off, bitch," Tommy sneered. Techno's eyes sharpened and for a moment Tommy thought the scars that stained Techno's skin seemed more pronounced. He suppressed a shudder.

It... it wasn't fair how one minute, Techno could look so gentle, and the next he looked like he could crucify you to a tree with a sword and not give a shit. Tommy scowled and looked away, clenching his hands in his lap as he stared at the bowl of soup in front of him - who the hell ate soup for breakfast anyway?

"Well, I - I mean I really don't need to bring him. He's got no protection and he's probably safer here with you anyway," Techno dismissed as he scooted his chair away from the table and began to lace up his tall armored boots.

"That may be best," Philza concurred.

Tommy fumed silently, clenching the fabric of his pants in his fists as he glared at the floor. Did he want to go? He didn't fucking know. He wasn't sure of anything anymore but - but he didn't like whatever the hell this was. This... this dance they all were playing, treating him like some delicate glass figurine on a shelf... treating him like he was pathetic...

He was pathetic - but... but...

" _Tommy, you're rather pathetic, you know that? Come here, I'll keep you safe so just put your armor in the hole. Not like you need it anyway._ "

Tommy's jaw clenched as that stupid honeyed voice wormed through his mind. He wanted to thrash and fight until it was out and gone for good. He hated how it made him feel, how it made his throat tight and his heart race like he was some stupid trapped animal.

"Tommy. If you want to go - " Philza must've seen his expression. Philza saw everything. Tommy hated it - he _hated_ it. Philza's eyes bore right into him, they saw how pathetic he was, how broken and messed up and useless. They saw him clinging to Dream as the masked man's hands ran through his hair and whispered warm words that made him think - just for a moment - that someone cared and he was loved and... 

Philza saw it all. He saw how disgusting it was, how disgusting _he_ was. Tommy knew Philza saw it... he _knew_.

"I'm fine!" Tommy cried. The response was sharp, louder than it needed to be, sounding like Tommy's voice was being dragged across a plain of broken glass that tore him apart.

Tommy glanced up and saw... pity. It was etched in their faces - even fucking _Technoblade_ had the gall to look at him with pity. Like this wasn't Techno's fault - like he had _any_ right to feel bad for what had happened.

"I'm fine," Tommy repeated. It was true - it had to be true. He would be fine. "I'm fucking fine..."

"Tommy," Philza began in that stupid caring tone that was soft and warm and... and sounded so fucking genuine. 

Tommy grated his teeth together as he closed his eyes.

Why was he so upset? Why was he like this? They hadn't done anything - he was just - he was just all messed up. He ran a hand through his hair, clenching the golden locks together as he tried to block it all out.

" _You hurt people, Tommy. That's what you do; push them away. I mean, that's why Tubbo exiled you, right?_ "

Tommy pulled harder on his hair as he felt those strong fingers card through his hair like an apparition he couldn't stop. He couldn't pull away from the ghostly touch, couldn't resist even though it brought his world crashing down around him.

"How about - " Techno's voice broke through Tommy's thoughts. It chased away those invasive touches that weren't there... because Dream wasn't here and he was safe... "- You stay here, Phil. I'll go to the nether, and should anyone else, _no one specifically of course_ , but should anyone else in this house want to come with me, you know, they can meet me outside in five minutes with some spare armor and a sword."

Tommy looked up slowly to where Techno sat, finishing up his boots with a tight knot. The hybrid cooly looked back at him with some sort of glint in his eyes - mirth? Was... was Techno being a smart-ass!?

"Bitch," Tommy muttered as he slowly released his hair.

Phil laughed. It took Tommy by surprise as such a genuinely happy sound bounced off the walls and danced around the room. Philza was laughing... like they were normal and happy and this was fine...

Maybe it was fine.

Techno snorted and shook his head before pulling his heavy cloak off a chest where it had lay strewn. 

"Outside. Five minutes. 'Kay, Tommy?" Techno demanded, walking over and climbing down the ladder, throwing Tommy a last-minute glare.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, fuck you," Tommy rolled his eyes and found it a little easier to breathe. He looked back to Phil who was smiling, his eyes dancing with energy as he regarded Tommy.

"What are you lookin' at!?" Tommy demanded.

"Nothing," Philza laughed - he really was having a hard time keeping that dumb smile off his face, what was so funny anyway!?

"I'm going with Techno," Tommy challenged as he waited for the rebuttal, the refusal.

" _Tommy, you can't do that... you'll get hurt, Tommy. Shhh, just stay here with me._ "

"I mean, if you want to, mate," Philza relented, a smile still dancing on his lips.

Tommy swallowed a lump in his throat he didn't know he had been choked up with.

"But you'll stay with Technoblade," Philza tacked on.

Tommy rolled his eyes.

"And you'll be careful - you know what, you should take these," Philza began rummaging through the potions chest, pulling out glass bottles of orange and pink liquid.

Tommy scoffed as he went to rummage through another chest for a set of spare armor - he'd lost his iron set when Techno found him and he hadn't known where to find it and wasn't quite ready to face the punishment of asking for it back.

He gently pulled spare armor out, always glancing back at Phil for a signal that he was touching something he shouldn't, or hear a snarl from Techno that he should keep his hand to himself.

Neither came.

Tommy fastened leather straps and adjusted metal plating until he was protected head to foot in a mix-matched set of armor.

He had been putting on a pair of boots when someone knocked on the door.

It was a timid knock, something more like a gentle tapping than an actual knock. It made Phil freeze, his wings puffing out like a gathering storm as he stared at the solid door. Tommy felt his muscles lock and tremble as he backed away like the door was a predator. There was a clatter as Techno dropped whatever he was doing and raced out the door on the lower floor.

"Who's there?" his distant voice was such a contradiction to the warm tone at breakfast, this Techno was harsh, cold, and dangerous.

"Oh! It's Technoblade!"

That... that was definitely not a dangerous voice.

"Hii Technoblade!!"

That... that was Ghostbur.

"Wil?" Phil was at the door in a moment, opening up which made Tommy freeze as ice ran through his veins.

What if it was a trap? What if Dream was right behind Ghostbur? What if -

"Phil!" a new voice cried.

Tommy knew that voice. He crept across the room to the open door and peeked out into the brisk morning.

There stood (well floated in one case) Ranboo and Ghostbur. Ranboo looked somewhere between panicking and crying as he looked from Techno who stood at the bottom of the stairs and Philza who stood before him.

"Ranboo?" Tommy questioned.

Ranboo and Ghostbur both looked at him and Tommy faltered as he saw Ranboo's eyes flash with what must've been a million different thoughts and emotions.

"Tommy?" Ranboo's voice trembled. "You're... you're not dead..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys! This chapter took me foreverrrrrr, I couldn't figure out how to end it. It was all fluffy and introspective and weird so I just rolled with it. It was a nice break from the heavy angst and lore from last chapter but...  
> But guys I REALLY like angst and lore.  
> So we're gonna have more.  
> Look forward to fluff next chapter - it's the last bit of fluff you'll get.  
> Hahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaa


	11. Patience of a Hunter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well, Dream can't cope so his friend-not-friend-they're-totally-sociopathic-friends comes and helps. Punz is the best, fight me!!!  
> Tubbo is still sad and, well, Dream is a manipulator at heart, what can I say?  
> Compass gets fixed, Techno is in trouble, and who the heck ordered a bunch of plot this chapter??

Punz found him in the Holy Land.

Dream sensed him coming long before Punz arrived, and while part of him instructed him to put on that mask of calm and control, a much smaller part of him whispered that despite everything Dream tried to hide, Punz could be trusted and Punz knew him well. No façade was necessary.

Punz wouldn't question why he was hacking training dummies apart in the outskirts of the Holy Land. Punz wouldn't think it was strange how his composure was gone, wouldn't probe him as to why his hands were trembling.

He wouldn't have to know that somewhere in this gods-forsaken world Dream's anger lay buried thanks to a chaotic god - that Dream had no idea how to find it or how to stop it from eating him alive from the inside out. He didn't have to know that the anger was tearing Dream apart at his seams as he watched his carefully laid plans start to unravel. Punz wouldn't know anything was wrong.

"Hey man, you okay?"

Dream struck another wooden dummy, a bit of satisfaction accompanying the splintering of wood as it fell in two to his measly dull stone training sword. He ignored Punz's first remark... he didn't want to talk - didn't want to answer questions even if he knew Punz wouldn't ask them.

"Dream.. hello? Anyone in there?" 

Dream clenched his jaw and cleanly decapitated the misshapen head of yet another dummy, the wooden sphere went tumbling into the grass like a renegade soccer ball.

"Dream!"

Punz's sharp voice finally pulled Dream away as he took a breath and looked over his shoulder at the mercenary. The anger in his blood was quelled with his fatigue and as he took a moment to breathe he was able to study his visitor.

Punz seemed... blasé, yes. He was blasé about this whole situation. He stood there casually with his hands in his sweatshirt, eyebrow raised at the decimation of wood that lay scattered around Dream (much like his sanity, Dream thought dryly).

"Punz," Dream greeted cordially. Good to know he still managed to _sound_ competent despite his foolish emotion trying to take control.

"Hey man... what's all this?" Punz asked gesturing to the wooden carnage.

"Oh... just... training," Dream dismissed as he sheathed the training sword and threw the casing aside into the grass. "Why? What brings you here?"

Punz shrugged, looking around with a level of disinterest that Dream knew had to be fake. 

He liked Punz... well, he understood Punz. No loyalties, no foolish attachments, just a desire for riches and an affinity for the thrill. They were very alike the two of them, but Dream had more experience in the ways of deception - Punz had only ever mastered the art of ' _looking like I don't give a shit_ '.

He could understand Punz...

Sometimes.

"I guess I was worried about you, man," Punz shrugged, finally looking at Dream. His eyes danced over Dreams mask before returning to the apparently more interesting sky.

"Worried?" Dream wheezed at the foolishness. "Why?"

"You've been... distant," Punz supposed. "I dunno man, I just... it's a little weird, you know. No one sees you for weeks and then I find you... here," he gestured to the training ground.

"I've been busy," Dream shrugged nonchalantly - and that wasn't a lie. He had been extremely busy.

"Uh-huh," Punz threw Dream a disbelieving glance as he ran a hand through his hair. "Busy..."

"Extremely. I'm being honest."

"Oh, I don't doubt it, Dream," Punz cocked an eyebrow as he sauntered towards Dream. "But... um... if you want to take out whatever problems you're having on something, maybe find something... sturdier?"

"Sturdier," Dream echoed. He watched with a level of appreciation as Punz unclipped armor and let it fall to the grass like a shedding skin until he was standing before Dream unprotected and strangely happy.

Dream mirrored the actions, ignoring the fact that logically, this was foolish. He didn't need to spar and definitely shouldn't be so incredibly unprotected ever, even if this was the Holy Land. But, there was still anger festering from his interaction with Drista... it would be nice to relieve some of it.

Punz unclipped his sheath from his belt, throwing it aside before raising his fists. He lowered himself as he got in a stance and smirked at Dream.

"Come on, you throw the first punch," Punz snickered.

Oh... when was the last time Dream had done this? As he raised his open palms and shifted his footing he felt a strange sense of familiarity settle upon him. Unprotected and unarmed - just two people of flesh and blood competing to test their metal...

He used to do this so often with -

Anger flared up in his chest like a hungry beast rearing its head. It made him surge forward towards his opponent like a tidal wave. Punz shuffled back as Dream closed the distance between them and the mercenary blocked the first blow, barely saving his neck from a jab before taking a swing of his own. Dream swayed away from the closed fist and took a step back, his right foot taking the opportunity to slam into Punx's side with a rounded kick.

Punz grunted as he stumbled to the side, recovering quickly and taking his turn to go on the offense. He moved, in Dream's opinion, like a wild cat. Quick to retaliate and quick to retreat. He hissed and took a swipe before backing away and preparing for the next blow. When things got dire, he'd charge and throw blows recklessly like it was all he had.

Dream loved it. He loved knowing how to manipulate the fight. He could thrive here, in this chaos, because it was all he ever knew. He knew where he could punch to make Punz recoil, he knew how to loosen his muscles when Punz got a lucky strike in and he knew how to deflect all the failed attacks. Most importantly, he knew how to push Punz to the edge until he destroyed himself to his own foolishness. He knew this life.

Punz knew it too. This pain, this familiar throb of aches and bruises - he knew this life like it was his only friend. His smirk never left his face even when blood trickled from his nose and his split lip made him wince. Even when he charged recklessly and Dream swept his legs out from under him, there was a smile on his face. When he hit the earth like a heavy brick and knocked all of the wind out of his lungs, Dream could feel Punz's spirits soar.

"Alright... maybe you win this time," Punz wheezed from his position in the grass, wincing as he rolled onto his side.

Dream made himself laugh - he'd always done that before, before he lost his humor and his joy and was left with this empty chest that now only festered in anger - his chuckle growing into the familiar wheeze that was something much like muscle memory, even if there was no true mirth in his heart.

He sat down next to Punz who had given up on trying to roll over and instead was propped up on his elbows, staring up at the blue sky with a smile on his bloodied face. Dream settled in the grass and waited patiently for him to break the silence.

"You feeling better?" Punz asked finally, looking over at Dream who glanced at him.

Dream internalized the question for a moment - was he feeling better? He wasn't feeling anything... that supposedly meant that his anger had been quelled so... perhaps he was.

"Yes," Dream answered.

Punz smiled.

"I don't suppose you want to talk about it," Punz snickered as he settled down and laid in the grass.

Dream stayed silent.

"Yeah, figured as much," Punz muttered dryly.

They sat there for a while longer, soaking in the warm sun that danced on the breeze. The bamboo rustled in the distance, striking against one another in a calming melody that was familiar to the two of them.

How many times had Dream been here? How many times had he soaked this all in after an intense match or a day of strain and strife? How many wounds had he wrapped as he sat on this grass?

He supposed a part of him was supposed to be reminiscing, there should be some sort of... ache. Instead, he felt disconnected. He felt like a stranger to this place because though he remembered loving it here he felt nothing. This Community House... this place of memories and warm old feelings was pointless. It did nothing for him.

Dream sighed.

"Punz..." he began. "Could I... ask for your help."

Punz perked up and Dream smiled. So happy to assist, so eager to be of use. Punz was a man of utility and if he did nothing then he was useless (at least to himself) so it was best to keep him close, keep him busy. He wasn't loyal, but he was predictable, and Dream appreciated predictable.

"Sure, what's up?" Punz smiled, sitting up and leaning closer.

"There is... I'm being challenged at the moment and I need to know if you're willing to be... on my side."

Ah, there it was. The flicker of hesitation - Punz hated loyalty. He hated forcing himself to serve someone, hated being restricted...

But he loved Dream.

He loved Dream because Dream never cursed him for his nature or damned him for his fickleness. Dream was reliable and Dream was kind...

Dream knew this. He felt his words ring with dissonance through Punz's whole being and he felt Punz recoil, a gentle hand to the shoulder was all it took to calm that.

"I'm not asking you to drop everything," Dream laughed lightly. "I just... You're all I can turn to at the moment, Punz. You're the only one I can trust."

Punz hesitated. Oh, the ache in his eyes was as apparent as the sun above. He was trusted and that was as strangely warming as the sunny day. Dream gently squeezed Punz's shoulder and let out a little sigh. 

"You know what I'm working towards... and you know that I'll pay you in the end - "

Punz scoffed at that, a soft smile on his face. "Yeah, you better."

Dream nodded in affirmation. "I will make this world find peace and I will build us into a family... but I need you to protect something."

Punz shifted uncertainty and Dream felt a wry smile light up his face - Punz didn't think Dream had anything worth protecting: good. If even Punz thought he had no attachments, then it had to be true.

"Sure... what do you need?" the mercenary asked.

"I may have to do something... bad. It'll make a lot of people angry with me so I need you to be my eyes on the inside... and should anything happen to me, I need you to protect something very precious to me."

"Anything," Punz nodded, a mirthful smile on his face.

"I have a base, at these coordinates - " Dream drew the numbers into the dirt at their feet and watched the man quickly memorize them before rubbing them away into the dust once more " - and in that base, there's a chest hidden in the wall beneath obsidian. No matter what happens, you cannot let anyone open or take that chest."

Punz's brow furrowed as he took in those instructions. He knew better than to ask questions but Dream sensed the curiosity flickering behind his eyes.

"If they do... I will be in danger, do you understand?" Dream asked. Punz nodded slowly, thoughts whirring behind his eyes like dancing lights.

"Protect the chest," Punz repeated.

"Please," Dream smiled. "I don't have any payment on me, but I can - " 

"No, no, Dream," Punz spoke gently now, a strange expression on his face that Dream couldn't read. "You can... payment can come later. I've got you. I'll stand by you."

Dream smiled under his mask and settled down. 

"Thank you Punz."

Punz chuckled.

"Anytime Dream."

_~~~_

_"You need a job?" the masked man asked the disgraced mercenary. Punz scowled and glared at the man who offered him a gloved hand._

_"Maybe..."_

A hand offered. A deal made. An alliance - Punz had never made one of those before - but he made one that time. A masked man who put faith in him and trusted him. Gods, it felt like that had happened eons ago. Lives ago he had met Dream and he had found... something more than an employer...

A friend? No... no Punz didn't have loyalties.

_"The world needs more people like you, Punz."_

He hated alliances for he always betrayed them... but this one... no matter how many treacheries he committed, how many betrayals made... the masked one always came back.

_"It's in your nature, Punz. I can't fault you for it."_

He had always come back, again and again. Asking for help, for his sword and shield, for his place in battle.

_"I can't expect you to be anything than what you are, Punz."_

Punz had no friend. He had no allies. He had employers and enemies... and then he had Dream. What was Dream? 

A friend? 

An... an ally?

_"You know what, Punz,"_ the masked one laughed after a battle, clapping him on the shoulder with a wheezed breath. _"You're always reliable. I can always count on you!"_

Punz clenched his jaw and steeled his nerves. 

He was reliable... he was counted on. Dream was the only one who understood, the only one who stayed around.

He was... something more than an employer. Less than an ally but more than an employer... yeah... that was a safe label.

_"I need you to protect something very precious to me."_

Punz could do it - he would do it. For Dream... and for himself. It always had to be for himself...

_"What do you have to gain by helping him?"_ that little nag in the back of his mind whispered, Punz brushed it aside. Dream was an employer, nothing more. He did it for the money, nothing more...

But in his heart, he knew that wasn't true.

Dream counted on him... no one really counted on him anymore... but Dream did...

That had to count for something, right?

~~~

Dream hummed to himself as he strode into L'Manburg. If he still had spirits they would've been raised by that wonderful agreement with Punz. But alas, he was empty and so he was left humming a strangely familiar tune to fill the air and that space where his heart should be. 

It was a nice day with a brilliant sky and a happy world to observe it - well, mostly happy.

The somber expressions of Quackity and Fundy suggested otherwise.

Dream lifted a hand in greeting and saw both men's expressions turn into glares. Dream could've laughed.

"What do you want?" Quackity bit as Dream stopped a few feet away. Also driven by emotion, that one was, always so spontaneous and rash - entertaining, of course, but also dull. He was just so angry all the time, it got bitter after a while. Quackity wasn't like Tommy - Tommy got angry too, but it was that rich anger, that pain-fueled, fascinating, absolutely gut-wrenching fury that could make that empty part of Dream burn with joy at the thought of a challenge. Quackity's anger was dull when compared to that.

"Hey, Dream, you still with us?" Fundy demanded.

Dream lifted his head and let out a long breath. Foolish thoughts, invasive brain-blurring daydreams that wasted precious time.

"Yes, I was... you know, just passing through. Thought I'd check in with Tubbo, see how he was faring after the... well you know, what happened with Tommy," the lie rolled easily off Dream's tongue - for it wasn't a lie but more of a half-truth. Those were the safest sort of lies.

"Where have you been?" Ah, there was that familiar accusatory tone that Quackity just _loved_ to take when Dream was near. "You kind of vanished after that whole fiasco."

Time to put on a little play for the accusor.

"I was... looking for Tommy," Dream let his voice get soft, let his figure slump slightly and his shoulders tense. He let them see him get vulnerable, or the closest he could get to it.

"Wh-What do you mean you were looking for Tommy, you told Tubbo he was dead!" Fundy cried.

"I know," Dream left his voice gentle, weak even. He saw uncertainty dance over Quackity's face and it almost made Dream smile. "I... I had hoped Tubbo would tell me he was alive - so that I could... I just want to make certain that he was... you know, dead. I... it's stupid, but I just can't stop hoping..."

"You created this world, didn't you, wouldn't you be able to tell if Tommy was still alive?" Quackity accused.

Dream let himself fidget, it was a strange thing to do consciously but it was familiar enough to make the action seem natural.

"I know what happens as it happens. If Tommy died while I was asleep... I wouldn't know." A truth - which is why Dream never slept. Sleeping was a waste for an immortal, it was needlessly vulnerable, something that cost him time. He hadn't slept in... gods, how long had it been?

"Oh..." Quackity looked away and crossed his arms.

"It's... it's stupid I guess, but I just - I guess a part of me can't accept the truth," Dream breathed softly, Fundy's ears pressed against his head as he eyed Dream with... pity?

Such a big heart in such a tragic man. Why was it the fox hybrid's eyes always looked at him so gently? There should be something in his chest twisting at warm memories of a candle-lit dinner and a happy night - but the memory was cold now so Dream felt nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

They stood in silence for a while more, the somber mood turning something akin to grief as Quackity bit his lip to hold back whatever emotions threatened to spill from his eyes.

"Have you seen Ranboo?" Fundy asked finally.

"Ranboo? No, why, is he missing?" Dream asked. That was intriguing... so Ranboo was gone. Dream hummed as his mind bounced different possibilities around.

"Since yesterday," Quackity nodded. "He went out in the rain and never came back. Don't know where he went..."

Dream nodded slowly - Had Ranboo gone off to meet with Philza? With Tommy? Did the hybrid know something? Dream would have to ask him...

"And Tubbo won't come out," Fundy sighed as he looked up to Tubbo's house.

"Oh?"

"The kid isn't taking it too well," Quackity breathed, his eyes softer at the thought of the young president.

"I'll go try and talk to him," Dream offered, taking a step towards the house. The boy was hurt, probably distraught... that meant he was vulnerable, malleable even. Quackity stopped him.

"He said he doesn't want to see anyone." The vice president was oh so protective at times and so easily dissuaded at others.

"It couldn't hurt to try, right?" Dream asked gently, watching the question smooth over the suspicion in Quackity's shoulders.

He brushed past the Vice and stepped up to Tubbo's front door, rapping gently at the door with a knuckle.

"Go away!" a distant voice cried, cracking like a brittle layer of ice over a stream.

"Tubbo," Dream called melodically. "Can I come in?"

There was hesitation. Good. 

Tubbo was learning that Dream's questions weren't optional.

Dream pressed through, closing the door softly behind him as he stepped into the warm house and tried to locate the sound of muffled sobbing. He climbed up a ladder and found the president curled up in the corner of his room with his head tucked in his knees. He was still in his pajamas even though it was late afternoon - which meant he probably hadn't eaten anything either. Truly a pitiful sight.

"Oh Tubbo," Dream crooned gently as he approached. Gentle words, warm sentimental words that brought the boy's head up and had his teary eyes meet Dream's mask.

He opened his mouth to say something before plunging his head back in his knees and sobbing again.

Dream stepped forward silently, crouching down and gently laying his hands on the boy's trembling shoulders. Tubbo curled away from the contact - a familiar motion - but Dream gently gripped them, trapping him under his fingers. Tubbo couldn't avoid this, couldn't prevent this.

"Shhh," he soothed gently as he leaned closer. 

Tubbo desired comfort, he needed comfort. It was natural for such emotional creatures... especially young ones. Children wanted to be held, wanted to be loved, or just know that someone was there - Dream knew that. He knew that when a wail bubbled out of Tubbo's throat it was him trying to fight against the urge to throw himself into Dream's waiting arms - so Dream pushed harder. He snaked his arms around Tubbo's back and held him closer, murmuring gentle assurances into the boy's ears.

It took a mere moment. A moment of faulting resolve that sent Tubbo's arms wrapping around his chest and wailing in his cloak.

Oh, how delicate children are. How soft and pliable, like clay or mortar. Time ruined people, it ruined this gentle naivety. Had Dream been a little stronger - a little wiser - he would've stripped away his humanity as soon as the first child entered his world and taken them all someplace safe, someplace that couldn't poison them as time did. He would train them all to be strong and prepared - so that no matter how hard the world pushed it would never crack them. He'd shape them into the perfect sort of family, one that never broke.

If only he had been braver - he could've given Tubbo a safer life away from all of this. But... he had been foolish and sentimental, he'd been selfish to hold on to his attachments and emotions, and so Tubbo was damaged and had to be cut away with the rest of the sickness.

"I'm sorry," Tubbo cried. "I know... I know it's pathetic... I... I'm sorry - "

"Oh, Tubbo," Dream cooed as lovingly as he could. "You're allowed to be upset."

"I was... I was doing alright - " Tubbo choked. "And - and then I remembered he was gone and I just... I can't do it Dream - I hate this - "

"Shhh," Dream was tempted to run his hands through Tubbo's hair, but that was more comforting for Tommy - wild, untrollable Tommy who Dream always felt he needed to keep a hand on to control him. Tubbo was so much more gentle, just a small little pawn in a large game. Instead, Dream rubbed circles into Tubbo's back, massaging at those knots and bunched up muscles, supporting the weak little one.

"I hate this..." Tubbo repeated.

"I'm sorry, Tubbo," the lie rolled off his tongue like honey and tasted just as sweet to see the boy's reaction. How those big eyes filled with tears and buried into his cloak once more. "You never should've been put in this position," Dream continued, planting his seeds of dissension and doubt. "It was cruel of Wilbur to expect you to run a ruined nation, it was cruel of anyone to expect you to do this, you're far too young."

Tubbo grew smaller at every word. Dream knew he was voicing those nasty little thoughts that whispered treacherous thoughts in Tubbo's ears. The boy was so close to breaking it was tempting to push him further off of that dangerous edge, and watch him plummet past the point of return - becoming a beautiful little tragedy for Dream to put back together.

Alas, Tubbo was too far out of his reach. He'd never manage it without some obnoxious person trying to intervene... someone like Quackity or Niki. So, he had to keep Tubbo in one piece for now and abandon him to the rest of this callused world.

Perhaps, in another life, Dream would feel regret. He rubbed Tubbo's back and hummed as he allowed those sinful daydreams to encompass his brain for a moment.

In another life, Tubbo could be a loyal little brother. A part of the family; someone who turned to Dream when he was hurt and would stop looking for solace in the anger of Quackity. He and Tommy would be a lovely little duo, running around and causing chaos... Dream could teach them both. They'd fight harder, strike truer - Tommy would never miss another shot and Tubbo would never earn another wound. Oh - in another life, it could've been wonderful to have them as his perfect little ones.

Dream sighed as he cast the daydream aside.

There was room for Tommy in his life - not Tubbo. Only Tommy - never Tubbo. The situation was dire and Tommy needed to grow quickly - Tubbo would slow that process.

"But you've done wonderful, Tubbo. I do mean it." Praise fed the broken ones, it made Tubbo sit up a bit straighter like a watered flower and his tears slowed. Large brown eyes met his mask and Dream felt his lips curl into a smile.

Maybe... maybe it wasn't too late. 

Maybe Tubbo could be his next project. He'd get Tommy - that was certain - he'd shape Tommy into his protégé... but Tubbo didn't have to be abandoned. It was cruel to abandon young ones. He could come back and train Tubbo - the boy had a knack for strategy and even if he was sheepish at times he had the chaotic spark of Dream's own spirit.

Tubbo could be a fine addition to the family after Tommy was reconstructed.

"What?" Tubbo choked.

"Listen, Tubbo, with everything you've had to deal with, you've always made the hard decisions. You always did what was best," Dream soothed.

"I... no... No, I killed Tommy - I - "

"Tommy brought about his own end - you cannot continue to blame yourself. Listen to me - " he made his voice harsh and watched those brown eyes sharpen with his tone. " - Tommy would not want this."

Ah, there was the nerve he wanted to strike.

Tubbo whimpered and trembling like a scared lamb.

"Tommy wouldn't want you to blame yourself - at least not the Tommy you knew. You can't shackle yourself down because of this. You're strong, Tubbo."

"Strong... no... no I don't think - "

"It's true," Dream praised, watching Tubbo straighten up so slightly. "You've run this country all by yourself. You saved this country when Tommy's stupidity nearly ruined the peace. You... you convinced me to view this place as an independent nation - all of that was you, Tubbo."

"Wha - really? You - you think we're... You respect L'Manburg?"

Dream chortled and let Tubbo out of his embrace.

"Of course, Tubbo. I respected your decision to exile Tommy - it proved you were serious. I've respected L'Manburg for a while now."

Lies. So many obvious lies that Tubbo's innocence never picked up on. It was... adorably innocent. Dream could never do this with any of the others; Fundy or Quackity. He couldn't take them into a hug and twist their foolish ideals away from such destructive paths - they were too callused for that. But Tubbo, Tubbo was soft and malleable and so desperate for stability that he easily latched onto Dream.

Dream decided then that he preferred dealing with children. They were so much more enjoyable to mold.

"But... Tommy..."

"It will heal," Dream promised. "It'll heal, all of that pain can disappear with time. But you have to continue on."

Tubbo let out a shaky breath a wiped his eyes. "Tommy... Tommy would want me to... "

"Exactly," Dream praised. "Whatever happened to Tommy after Wilbur died was part of his self-destructive spiral. All his hatred for you was just part of the spiral - the Tommy you and I knew well would want you to stand up and move on."

"I... I don't want to move on," Tubbo choked.

"You have to," Dream urged gently. "You can't just... stay like this. Right?"

Tubbo wiped his nose and sniffed.

"Right," his voice cracked as the boy agreed.

"Now, come on, let's get you something to eat," Dream soothed, pulling Tubbo to his feet and leading him toward the ladder.

He made sure the boy ate and waited downstairs as he changed into something more suitable for the afternoon. They talked gently about less heavy topics, every conversation serving to emphasize just how Dream was _there_ for Tubbo. How he was _there_ to support and stand beside the young president.

So, when Dream took his leave, Tubbo stopped him at the doorway and hugged him.

"Thank you..." Tubbo breathed quietly.

Dream laughed - because he had won and Tubbo was his and no one was going to pry him away from him easily, _not like they took Robin no one would ever do that again_ \- and hugged the boy back.

"Tubbo... don't thank me," he cooed. "I just want to help you."

"You do..." Tubbo smiled pulling away. "You help me a lot, Dream."

Dream gently reached out a ruffled his hair. Robin's hair had been that soft - _NO!_

He recoiled and silently took his leave, ignoring the pain in his head.

He took off down the boardwalk and towards the forest, stopping only when he caught Quackity in his peripheral approaching him. The Vice President stopped before him with a strange sort of expression on his face.

"Quackity," Dream greeted.

"Dream." Quackity's voice was strained and his eyes refused to meet the mask. Strange...

"Can I help y-" Dream began.

"I wanted to say thanks," Quackity spat out.

If Dream still had emotions he would've taken a step back in astonishment. How the mighty fall... Quackity, thanking him? 

"Oh?"

"I just... don't look at me like that you bastard. You comforted Tubbo and watched out for Tommy until he... you know... and then you offered to help with Ranboo and... Look, I know we aren't friends and I don't want to pretend that you're not an absolute dick... but... you... Look, I'm just saying thanks, you know."

Dream chuckled and nodded.

Tommy's "death" was already having profound effects on the people in this world... gods what was going to happen when Tommy returned by his side. Part of him wished he could still get giddy with excitement.

"Anytime Quackity," Dream dismissed as he walked away, leaving the Vice President struggling with wounded pride and an aching heart.

Emotions drove so many people in the world... and Dream was fabulous at manipulating emotions.

_~~~_

"Done? Already?" Dream asked, a smile spreading under his mask.

"Well... it was curious," Sam laughed as he handed him the compass. "I started working on it yesterday and, it was ruined, no doubt, so replaced a bunch of mechanisms - it was almost addicting honestly, like a puzzle - and... well, I got it done."

Dream took the compass from Sam's hands and smiled as the red arrow twisted to point northward like a stoic little soldier. 

He felt the excitement within him fluctuate at the thought of a hunt. He was enraptured at the thought of the journey ahead, the inevitable victory; the mental image of Tommy squirming in his grasp as he dragged him back to where it was safe and where he could make certain that things worked out. He held the compass as if it was something precious and delicate before he grinned under his mask, turning the metal over in his hands and running his thumb over the engraving.

_Your Tommy_

His Tommy...

"So, when are you gonna give it to Tubbo?" Sam asked.

Dream perked up and found himself speaking another lie without another thought. "Not for a while, he's struggling a lot right now and I'm afraid this may ruin all his progress. It's a fresh pain, you know... so... in a while."

Sam seemed a little disappointed but nodded in understanding.

"I get it..." he murmured.

"Thank you so much, Sam," Dream praised. "This means a lot."

Sam grinned. "No problem, Dream. And it should point to Tommy's last point, I didn't mess with the enchantment."

"Yeah... Logstedshire," Dream smiled. Good, Sam hadn't seen the compass move and so didn't suspect anything - that bode well for the future. Sam was a valuable asset even if his morals were something annoyingly steadfast. Dream waved goodbye as he began following the arrow's direction, if it hadn't moved for Sam then Tommy was distant and there was much ground to cover. "Later, Sam."

Sam waved in return but Dream barely saw it.

The hunt was on.

Something primal in Dream trembled in eagerness and as soon as Dream was out of sight he took off running.

He ran and teleported, then ran and ran some more until his heart was racing with his eager lust for victory. He followed the arrow as if he was a wolf who had caught a scent, and he wouldn't falter. He would reclaim Tommy, and take him home.

He would not lose him again.

Northward. Past the forests and the plains. Over the ocean and into the frozen north where the snow crunched under his feet and the wind nipped at his fingertips. Past the spruce and the snow and Techno's house and -

wait.

Dream paused as he landed from teleportation and looked at his compass. The purple particles from his ender pearl still dancing like snowflakes.

It was pointing south now.

No... surely not.

Dream walked back, taking refuge in the trees as he backtracked to Techno's cottage.

It had to be a mistake.

Dream looked from the compass to the house... back to the compass... back to the house.

No...

No. Techno wouldn't... Techno _wouldn't_ \- 

Laughter. The piercing sound broke through the frosty afternoon air making Dream crouch even lower until his chest was pressing against the layer of snow that always hung around this Northern land.

Dream knew that laughter. He peered at the house and saw the open windows where the sound originated. He was about to creep closer when the side door was thrown open and a head of familiar golden hair appeared in the rays of the sun, dawning a bright blue cloak and a familiar smile.

Tommy.

Dream's blood ran cold as his mind burned with fury.

It was Tommy.

The boy was jeering at someone in the house as he collected a pile of snow in his hands and packed it into a ball. With a loud yell of "bitch" the snowball was thrown into the house resulting in a distant roll of laughter.

Tommy was here.

Tommy had been here all along.

Technoblade had known.

Techno had _lied_

Speak of the devil, the hybrid lumbered out of the house with a scowl on his snow-caked face before the great warlord stooped low and gathered a pile of snow below him. Tommy was laughing and spewing fake apologies before he was knocked into the snow by one of Techno's painfully accurate snowballs.

The... the traitor.

Dream felt something low in his gut burn with rage. If he had kept his sadness in his chest it would be twisting with betrayal. He wasn't upset - he _wasn't_!

What did it matter if Technoblade had lied to him - they had no reason to be loyal to one another! Technoblade was a villain, a monster of blood and violence with ideals that lacked morals and loyalties that lacked flexibility. He was _nothing_ to Dream.

What did it matter that they had seen each other when they were most vulnerable? What did it matter if Technoblade was the only one who could ever understand Dream? So what if they had spent eons together fighting alongside and against one another? So what if Techno betrayed him... it didn't matter...

It didn't...

There was an iridescent shimmer as a ghost curled up around Tommy who was getting to his feet and cursing out Technoblade - Ghostbur.

Damn it! _Damn it_! 

The ghost was alive!?

Anger clawed at Dream's throat forcing Dream to swallow a lump and clench his jaw. He needed to calm down! This was foolhardy - a waste of energy. His anger did nothing but warm his chest.

He tried to take a deep breath, but the next person to emerge through that door made Dream feel bile rise in his throat as his corruption rooted deeper in his soul. The darkened roots settled in his heart and demanded peace and order, the destruction of all who break his rules and the absolute rule he must impose. All of it centered on one man; Philza.

He emerged like he was an angel, wings folded high and proud behind his back, unfurling like a rising velvet curtain of grey clouds studded with white diamonds. A picture of chaos incarnate, disobedience, and insubordination as he wore his wings like a trophy.

Dream felt pain lace up his chest as the corruption, displeased with his lack of action, attacked its host.

It was his anger. His anger was feeding the corruption like food to a parasite - he took ragged breaths as he forced himself to look away from the group.

Anger did nothing. Rage and fury were pointless. He needed to think - think and scheme. This could be fixed... this was not world-ending. He could fix this.

When Dream looked back, he saw the final member of this little group of renegade rebels; Ranboo. Dream wasn't sure what to think of the half-breed's appearance. Timid as he looked he seemed pleased to see Tommy and was comfortable around Technoblade...

Ranboo could spoil of this should he tell L'Manburg Tommy was alive...

But he was with Technoblade...

Ah... there it was.

The anger in Dream's throat receded like a tide as he satisfied himself with a new plan. Technoblade would rue lying to him. Philza would pay for striking him and stealing what was his. And Tommy? Tommy would be home. 

Woe to anyone who got in his way.

He raced back to L'Manburg, feet light and chest heavy as he forced his anger away and whatever other residues of emotion lay in his throat. Foolish - it was foolish to be bothered by others. So they stood against him - they would pay. Simple as that.

This was his world, they were to follow his rule.

The corruption in his chest purred at the sound of that, releasing its grip on his chest ever slightly as it reminded him of his oath over and over again.

_"Keep peace. Keep control. Keep the peace. Keep the control. Your world cannot fall to any hand but your own. Keep the peace. Keep your control."_

Dream's feet practically slammed onto the wooden boards of L'Manburg carrying him all the way to the door of its young president. He knocked eagerly, a wicked grin behind his mask.

Slowly, the door opened and large eyes poked out curiously.

"Dream?" Tubbo asked softly. "What's going on?"

"Well, Mr. President," Dream began slowly, tilting his head. "I think I've discovered something to lighten your spirits."

"Oh? What?"

"How about the location of L'Manburg's public enemy number one?" Dream chuckled. "Technoblade."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hahahahahahaha...  
> Oh, now the fun begins.


	12. Precarious Peace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Techno and Dream are apples. No, I will not give context.  
> Quackity has trauma - TRAUMA I TELL YOU  
> Also, Techno blade totally does not like Tommy - no, what are you talking about (denile is not just a river in Egypt).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: alcohol abuse & abuse in general

Techno's house was filled with life and a strange sort of chaos that was very foreign to the Blood Lord. Domesticity had never been an option or, to be frank, a desire that he'd ever had for his future. It was weird, turning a corner or climbing a ladder to find every room full of laughter or lively argument. It set his nerves on edge every time someone entered a room quietly or touched him without warning - but it was nearly unavoidable with four people (and a ghost) wandering around his cottage. It left him unsettled... but strangely warm.

The voices hummed in excitement.

Their cries for blood were subtle, almost dismissable honestly. They mostly cooed in pleasure when Tommy smiled or laughed at Ranboo's little shenanigans. Sometimes they yelled or cheered, but it was rarely for blood. The times they did scream, they roared, roared in anger, anxiety, or fear. They snarled at the thought of Dream or L'Manburg, twisting and gnawing like a caged wolf, but they didn't lash out at those around him. It was a simmering rage, one that reared its head like a patient predator with its prey in sight.

When Tommy flinched from loud noise or a gentle touch, the voices pounded on Techno's head begging for Dream's blood, begging for pain and retribution from the smiling godling. When Ghostbur or Ranboo spoke of L'Manburg Techno couldn't help but feel disgust curl in his chest, squeezing his heart in its vice-like grip as he felt anger burn in his eyes and devour his sanity. When he thought of Phil, treating his wounds or envisioning Dream's retribution, he felt fear - cold terrible fangs - sink into his skin and tear him apart... He could not let Dream ever find Phil.

Other than that, the voices were soft, easily drowned out by a kind word or a loud boisterous laugh from one of Techno's guests. They cooed when Techno's hands were stained blue from Ghostbur's many gifts or when Tommy's voice filled the house in tandem with some music disc he'd put on. They laughed alongside Ranboo's jokes and cheered for Phil whenever he did much of anything. They weren't angry at much anymore and that was... lovely.

Techno still made sure the cries in his head were fed. He went out every night, covering his sword with blood and entrails that colored his steel and slung to his clothes just to ensure that the voices stayed happy with him. They did, they stayed happy with him and with Philza and Tommy and Ghostbur, and... they'd even found an affinity for Ranboo and fawned over him.

Technoblade didn't care to understand why the voices had suddenly become soft, but he was thankful for it. It let him think - gave him times to plan. After all, it was only a matter of time before Dream found them and he wouldn't stop until he had what he wanted. Technoblade could only kill him so many times before the masked godling got creative...

He'd take Tommy. Most importantly, he'd hurt _Phil_.

Dream would find a way, he always did. The guy's schemes were nothing to scoff at and definitely not something to underestimate. He had a mind of a predator and it was sharp as a steel trap - just as dangerous too.

He'd hunt Phil down, and if he found out Phil had broken the rules - that he had his wings back - then he would enact whatever justice he deemed necessary and knowing Dream, it wouldn't be gentle. There would be blood, thick and red and _beautifully terrible and it would cover Phil with his gentle smile and warm laugh all painted red by his blood because we are the blood god but Dream is of chaos and while we worship blood the green one draws it heartlessly so it'll cover Phil like a blanket and he'll never wake up because Dream is like us with his power and so he fears no punishment for the permanent crime and he'll make Phil bleed and scream and beg_ -

There were times when Techno had to step away. Had to breathe. Moments when his mind flew too colorfully over terrible futures...

Technoblade contemplated it one evening with Tommy sleeping in his bed upstairs and Ranboo on the couch below with Ghostbur milling about mindlessly, likely cuddling with his sheep downstairs. He sat in his chair beside the fire with Phil's gentle fingers running through his hair, brushing away his discourse and anxiety with those steady fingers that seemed to weave magic through his untamable mane.

"Phil," he rasped as he gazed into the fire.

Phil hummed in response, tugging a bit on a tangled strand of pink hair as he did so.

"What are we going to do?" Techno asked thoughtfully. It really hadn't meant to sound as hopeless as it did... their situation wasn't hopeless - far from it. As long as Techno was nearby, he'd deter Dream because, despite all of Dream's power and conniving, he still feared the raw power of the Blood God. Their situation was... limiting. There were in Dream's world playing by Dream's rules and therefore had to play safe. 

Techno knew that at long as he was here, Phil would stay safe... Dream wouldn't attack.

Now, of course, that meant they could never stray from each other far - though it's not as if Techno minded that. If he had his way he would stay by Phil's side in every world, for all time. A rare smile graced his face as he leaned into Phil's touch, relishing the warmth in his chest as the man ran his fingers through his hair. That warmth bubbled up and settled in his throat before being let out a small little sound, something not human but not a monstrous roar either, just a content little huff.

Phil chirped in reply and chuckled warmly, Techno could hear his wings shifting as he settled in a chair beside Techno to continue the braid. Philza draped the pink strands over one another in their hypnotic pattern, little warbles emerging from his throat like a songbird's morning tune. It was a familiar lullaby of random chirps and calls that Techno matched with his own snorts and huffs that were instinctual and warming.

_Save Phil proteccc KILL DREAM aww soft boi hours TechnoSOFT DududuDUdu SpeedrunSafety TechnoBRO Tommy!! SLEEPYBOIZZZ BirdiePhil Lookatthatsoftyyyy So soft Dadzaaaaaa We love to see it SleepyBOIS TechnoSoft Awwwwww F in the chat bois depression is ded e e e e e e_

"Phil," Techno forced himself out of that euphoric daze and looked sideways at the closest thing he ever had to family. "What are we going to do?"

The angelic man stared at him for a moment, those light blue eyes shifting like the surface of an icy pond in the morning sunlight. Finally, Phil leaned back, his hands leaving Techno's hair for a moment as he thought about his response.

"I figure as long as we stay here, claim this as our own, Dream should know better than to mess with us," Philza reasoned. "We can't let him get Tommy."

"Or you," Techno added simply. "Cause - you know he's probably angry at you and all that - "

"Techno." Phil's voice was hard for a moment, taking Techno by surprise. He raised his brows and glanced at the man who had crossed his arms and stared at Techno with something between earnestness and desperation. "If it comes to you deciding between me and Tommy, you need to go save Tommy."

So many arguments filled Techno's head. So many loud voices screaming and clawing at Techno's skin in frustration and denial because Tommy may be a child _but he had chosen his fate and he could never come before Phil, Phil's blood was thick and warm and should never be spilled but Tommy's was bright and fresh and could be drained but never Phil's - never Phil_.

"Fine," Techno _lied_. He lied and he hated himself for it. He'd just _lied_ to Philza. He wanted to dig his nails into his arms until their nails pierced his skin and sent his own blood trickling down because he had lied. No matter what happened he could never abandon Phil to anything, he couldn't... he wouldn't...

Phil's hands went back to the braid, gentle tugs pulling on Techno's skull that was home to a rising orchestra of rioters.

The voices were starting to get riled now, tearing Techno's skin off of him and exposing the monster underneath. Phil could see it - Phil _must_ be able to see it. The voices tore away the soft clothes and warm skin, they stripped Techno of his jewels and his crown until he was nothing but the gruesome monster that smelled of blood and rot. The killer and liar who didn't deserve this warmth or these gentle touches.

He pulled away from Phil's hand as the man finished his braid and tried to gently lay in on his arm.

He had lied to Phil.

"We need to upgrade our weapons," Techno reasoned as he stood up, his braid swaying behind him, solid and strong. "Tommy needs armor and I'll be frank with you - I really don't know what Ranboo is doing here but I - I may as well just get some more netherite in case."

He could smell the blood on his breath - souls of the damned screaming in his mind and tearing him apart layer by layer. They churned in his stomach and ate at what was left of his heart leaving Techno nothing but a shell of death. He couldn't look at Phil. He could hardly bear to look at his hands - scarred and burned from centuries of strife that never satisfied him... he'd never be satisfied.

"Better do it tomorrow. Sooner rather than later, you know. We have no idea how long Dream will take to find us... and Wilbur's arrival interrupted your plans yesterday," Philza agreed.

If he smelled the blood, he gave no sign. Philza was always kind like that - pretending that he didn't smell the rot that ate at Techno's soul.

"Sure," Techno managed. "You'll be safe here, hopefully... Tommy can borrow my spare set of armor. If Dream comes - "

"We'll be alright, Techno," Philza laughed warmly. He stood up and walked up to Techno - too close, _too close_. He could surely smell the blood, how it clung to Techno like a curse. He could see through Techno, right into his rotting soul that hosted worms and grubs of destruction and chaos. He could see everything... As Phil clapped a hand on his shoulder Techno was sure his true nature was about to rip through his skin and snap at the man.

But the voices only hummed in encouragement and the monster in him stayed dormant.

"I'll go," Techno murmured, reaching for his cloak hanging by the mantle.

"Now?" Phil asked.

Yes. Now. Before his rot spread to Phil, to Tommy, to Ghostbur or to Ranboo. Techno threw on his cloak and was out the door before Phil's soft words could lure him back into the warmth that he didn't deserve or the protests of the voices could convince him otherwise.

He traversed the tundra and slipped into the nether, his pickaxe in hand and his chest burning with something unfamiliar and terrible.

He slaughtered the first group of hellish demons he found.

The voices cheered, as usual, but they also... wept?

_"If it comes to you deciding between me and Tommy, you need to go save Tommy."_

Why - why was he so bothered!? Why were the voices somber and outraged by that request? Well... he knew why, but maybe if he refused to admit it, it wouldn't be true.

He blew caverns into the depths of hell, finding remnants of ancient debris left strewn all over the red rock and lava caves. He collected and worked until his hands ached from strain and his skin stung from the long exposure to heat.

Still... all he could smell through the ash was his blood and rot...

"You seem busy."

Techno whirled around with a snarl on his lips at the familiar voice. His voices screamed in joy and anger _because now is our chance so kill him now spill his blood break his legs make him crawl make him beg there's nowhere to run only places to burn but don't let him burn let him bleed only burn what remains_.

Dream sat on an outcropping of nether stone, looking over the newly blown cavern, his bleached mask seemingly focused on a stream of lave trickling from above. The fact that Techno didn't know how long he had been there made his skin crawl.

"Dream," Techno greeted through clenched teeth. Red was filling his vision, blurring the stone and lava together in a blind rage and blood lust. "What are you doing here?"

Dream hummed and lounged back, holding the back of his head in his hands as he leaned on the ashen red stone of the nether. 

"Well, I was in the nether - still on the lookout for Tommy and all - when I felt you were nearby and then I heard some explosions so I just thought I'd check-in."

"Well - there's not much to see in all honesty so you don't have to - you know, really wouldn't want to waste your time," Techno smirked, the smile failing to reach his eyes.

Dream's head tilted a bit as he looked down at Techno. He must've come to some conclusion because the guy hummed before sitting up and jumping down to Techno's level. He sauntered over like some sort of cat with its tail held high and its ears erect. A cat Techno was willing to give flying lessons through a well-placed kick.

"You seem tense, Techno. Anything wrong?" Techno hated that tone, that unreadable honey-thick tone that made you feel all sticky and wrapped up in Dream's taunt little strings. He hated when he couldn't read Dream, not his face or his voice.

"No," Techno huffed in response. "Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to - you know - get back to work." _Leave before I kill you_ went unsaid.

Dream only came closer. Every footstep made Techno's hand clench around the handle of his pickaxe and boosted the growl building in his throat. Those sharp boots stopped inches away from Techno's own as Dream's mask turned to gaze up at him.

Such a small man... he looked so meager and small right now - like a twig that would bend and snap at its brittle breaking point beneath Techno's heel... but Techno knew better. He knew what that lithe figure could do, how he could jump and twist, turning every weapon sweetly as he ripped it out of foes who were corpses before they hit the ground.

Now... Techno couldn't tell if the rot he was smelling was from him... or Dream.

"Come on, Techno, what's wrong?" Dream taunted - it had to be taunt. Techno felt anger and fear clench his gut as the voices screamed at him and his own mind raced.

_Bad! Uh oh AH! KiLL HIMMMM! blood for the blood god MURDER TOMMY! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD PHILZA!! Tubbo is bad Tubbo is GONE BLOOD! E KILLL Get em' TECHNOO Homeless MAN BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD Get em! Homeless green man BLOB bOi PHILZAA Help - BAD BAD BAD BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD MURDER BLOOD KILL_

"Nothing," he growled, shoving Dream aside with his shoulder as he continued on.

"Oh no, don't give me the cold shoulder Techno - I know that look... you're feeling guilty," Dream supposed.

Techno felt his body freeze... he couldn't remember the last time he'd felt so cold. His blood felt like it froze in his veins.

"Hmm, now why would Technoblade be feeling guilty?" Dream wondered aloud as he began pacing behind Techno. His boots clicked against the warm netherrack filling the space and slamming against the white noise in Techno's hear as the screams of his voices turned into some sort of static cacophony.

"I - I really don't know what you're trying to do here, Dream," Techno managed to put his words to a dry chuckle, his eyes fixed on the edge of the cavern.

A hand was placed on his shoulder making Techno's skin prickle and his nerves burst. Dream's touch was not warm or gentle, it wasn't Phil's soft caresses or his careful brushes that ghosted over the skin like they were always asking permission. Dream's touch was just as rotten as Techno was, it was harsh and strong, clamping around his shoulder and filling his senses with blood and chaos as it festered and molded.

Dream let out a distant sort of hum as the hand drifted down Techno's shoulder and told hold of his blue cape. Techno growled, low and dangerously as he watched the man study his cape out of the corner of his eye.

"You know, I think I prefer you in red," Dream hummed as his finger rubbed the edge of the Antarctic logo.

"Well - it isn't really your place to start lecturing people on fashion and style," Techno gave him a look over and took in the greens that covered Dream like he was some paint swath.

Dream cocked his head, perhaps feinting hurt. He didn't release Techno's cape which kept the anger bubbling in Techno's throat.

He could just kill him now. It would make him feel _so_ much better.

"I like you in red - reminds me of an apple," Dream shrugged.

"Why would I want to look like - "Techno began.

"All nice on the outside - you know," Dream continued. "Hiding what's beneath it under the thin red or green skin."

The voices in Techno's head screamed as Techno felt everything else in him recoil...

Dream could smell the rot. He saw the blood. He saw and he knew.

Techno's hands shook as he imagined turning Dream's green hues red with the man's blood. It would be so easy. So simple.

"What happened, Techno?" Dream asked gently as he leaned into Techno's side. "What's got you so down."

"I'm gonna be real with you, I'm fi - " Techno began trying desperately to hide the strain.

Dream hushed him. The masked godling's hands gently drifted up to his face and pulled off that unsettling mask as he leaned closer. What was underneath wasn't anything more soothing.

Techno regarded that horrific face with the same monotone expression he had when Dream first showed him the truth that lay underneath that smile. A small voice in the back of Techno's head warned him that Dream never dropped his glamour enchantment, that Dream hated showing his true expression and would never reveal it so casually - 

The voices screamed that this was dangerous. That Dream was dangerous... That Dream was danger in every form of the word.

Techno only found himself taking in the face of his fellow damned soul. His gaze ran along the human aspects of Dream's face, taking in the starry golden freckles that littered the pale face that was white as fine-china. He met those flickering green eyes with his steady red ones and was reminded of times when those eyes had been dim with anger and vengeance. Finally, he risked a glance at the mouth - that permanent smile that curled upward almost painfully forced, littered with self-inflicted scars that discolored his soft lips which hid the unhuman fangs behind them.

Dream twisted his head side-to-side as if to show off his gruesome appearance. It was so wrong. Dream hated his face, hated being exposed, hated the stares. He cowered in dark corners and fled from mirrors to hide what he was... or at least he had always done that. Now... now he seemed to relish in the way Techno's eyes took in his hideousness.

Not... hideousness... that was... that was cruel. In truth, Techno had met worse - uglier even. Beings that were more twisted and misformed. In a certain light, maybe Dream could've even been considered pretty with his wild eyes and bright complexion (as long as you didn't look at his smile). 

"What's wrong, Techno?" Techno nearly took a step back as he watched Dream's lips form those words, curled into the eternal smile. "Don't like what you see?"

"What's going on with you Dream?" Techno didn't quite mean for his voice to come out so... weak. This was wrong. The rot festered in Techno's chest and seeped from Dream's smile.

"Me?" Dream laughed a bit as he took a step back from Techno. "I'm fine - actually better than usual."

That wasn't good. 

"Why?" Techno growled.

Dream tapped his chin thoughtfully as he tilted his head and twisted his smile into what could've been considered an expression of pondering.

"Well... as of recently, I've come to the... conclusion, I guess - yes, I've come to the conclusion that I have been trying too hard," Dream supposed.

"Trying too hard," Techno echoed, narrowing his eyes.

Dream's eyes slipped into some deeper shade, some sort of sad? coloration before Dream slipped his mask back over his face and stuffed his hands in his pockets.

"It's just so - " Dream let out a dejected sort of sigh, his shoulders falling for a moment, "- it's so hard to pretend to be different."

"Different?"

"Human, mortal, normal," Dream explained with a fake sort of laugh. He waved his hand around to gesticulate the quantity, "I've been trying so hard to be... human. Happy and peaceful - complacent, even."

"Really?"

"Don't give me that tone, Techno! Come on. It's true. I tried to keep the peace, tried to be civil - I think I've been very kind!"

Techno raised a brow and crossed his arms, pickaxe still in hand. "And - not to rush you or anything - but where is this going?"

"I'm done," Dream said simply. "I've decided to take one out of your book."

"Heh?"

Dream sighed at Techno's questioning tone and spread his arms wide as if he was going to embrace Techno ( _he better not - Techno would kill him and it would be justified_ ).

"We're monsters, Techno. You and I. We always have been, always will be," Dream laughed.

The part of Techno that Philza loved rose up to argue. It was silenced by the voices and the smell of rot. Techno floundered for a moment as he tried to keep himself still.

"We've never been good people!" Dream continued with his happy little taunting tone. "So why am I trying so hard? I should've just accepted myself years ago - would've saved so much time."

He was right about the first part - that wasn't a question. Techno had long accepted what he was. Good people didn't long for the smell of blood. Good people didn't hear voices screaming for death. Good people weren't rotting from the inside out. Monsters on the other hand...

"Why are you talking to me about this?" Techno demanded.

"Because we're the same, you and I," Dream supposed, his voice dark and encasing - like a moonless night or the depths of the sea. 

"We're not the same, Dream," Techno forced himself to smirk. "I can still put your head in the ground."

To that, Dream chuckled.

"I mean we're the same morally. We understand our highs and lows, we... we're the closest thing to each other we'll ever find..."

Techno gruffed and went to turn away. He hated how he felt tethered, trapped in webs and strings that dripped from Dream's fangs and reached for his throat. _Kill_ the voices said, but the order felt empty now. He should - he really should... 

"I understand you, Techno," Dream's voice was softer now. Something strangely gentle and - Fake, it had to be fake. Techno's skin crawled with guilt as he tried to destroy whatever was in his chest, twisting his heart.

"Good to know, Dream."

"I'll never hate you for being a monster - for what's in your nature," Dream continued.

"Great," Techno hissed as he forced himself onward.

"... Will you ever hate me for mine?" Dream prodded gently as he trailed Techno for a moment. Techno hesitated as he turned back to the masked godling.

"...What?"

"My nature? Will you ever hate me for doing what's in my nature?"Dream asked again, his voice stills soft, sounding delicate as it hung in the air.

Dream's nature... 

Techno thought of the fleeting chaos of a battle, how maniacal laughs rung through the air and corruption rooted in his chest. He thought of how the most expressive he'd even seen Dream in his corrupted state was when he was covered in blood and smiling grotesquely. He thought of Dream's nature, the calm and collected man who could even be kind until corruption ate him alive.

He thought of the godling and the god he was held to and he found some resolve.

He remembered Philza's dark bruises and deep wounds. He remembered Tommy's fear and Phil's anxiety. He thought of bloodied fields littered with corpses and thousands of voices calling in unison their support. He thought of a broad smile and a crazed laugh with green eyes that glinted sadistically. He thought of the corrupted godling he'd fought beside and he found his answer.

"Yes." Techno was certain with his answer as he squared off with the godling. "Yes... goodbye Dream."

He walked away, feeling the slightest bit of relief when Dream didn't follow.

"No matter what happens, Techno," Dream called after him, his voice bouncing off every wall in Techno's mind and churning the voices once more. "No matter what - I'll never forsake you. No matter who you hurt or who betrays you."

The worst part of it was - Techno knew that wasn't a lie.

They were damned, the two of them. Ruins and fallen temples spoke of their glory and the battlefield whispered their fate. They were apples, sitting beside a tree looking young and beautiful that hid the ugliness of the corruption and rot that was always at their core.

There were damned...

Techno said nothing more but strode away; out of the nether, through the snow, all the way home where he was greeted with warm welcomes and gentle hands that were wasted on a rotting monster like him.

It didn't matter if no one else smelled the rot or saw the blood on his hands. He did - and he knew Dream did too.

~~~

There was something off.

Quackity couldn't put his finger on it - but something was up. This whole situation settled uneasily with him. Tubbo's eyes were dark as he laid out the plan (Dream's plan). He watched the young president throw orders around like he had been born to lead and for a moment Quackity swore he saw goat horns poking through the boy's hair. The shiny horns glimmered like metal bars as they slowly grew and twisted, curling around and framing Tubbo's gentle face like a cage.

He blinked and they were gone.

It was just Tubbo, with his young face and large eyes that sat above dark bags. Those brown eyes glanced at him and Quacktity swore there were permanent tears etched into the boy's expression.

"Tubbo," he managed, putting a hand on his president's shoulder.

"We're going to get him," Tubbo turned to face Quackity and the shapeshifter watched familiar emotions stewing in Tubbo's eyes. The type that sat and festered because you could never find it in yourself to deal with them. Tubbo's expression fell through a few bouts, guilt-sadness-despair-anger, before finally settling on an uneasy smile.

Quackity knew that smile.

"We're going to get justice," Tubbo smiled with his pain-hurt-anger-sad eyes.

Quackity opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted by Fundy's objection,

"Shouldn't we wait for Ranboo - " Tubbo silenced the fox hybrid with a hand and put on a strange sort of expression that was somewhere between a tearful smile and a scowl. 

Quackity saw the words failing to leave Tubbo and so took charge. He knew Tubbo, he knew what he was going to say. He knew how to lead - he knew what to do.

"We don't know where Ranboo is so we can't plan for that. I'll try and get a message to him but we can't put this off. As soon as Phil returns to L'Manburg - we need to take that chance," Quackity urged.

This was usually the part where Tubbo would say something about being humanitarian or giving Philza the benefit of the doubt.

Silence. Quackity turned and saw Tubbo nodded slowly as if he had accepted it with few grievances. Something in Quackity's chest twisted in sick joy to see Tubbo finally accepting what was necessary. Tubbo was listening to him, agreeing with him - 

"Technoblade needs to come to justice. We can't wait any longer," Tubbo insisted. "Wounds need to heal."

The phrase _so that I can start healing other things_ went unsaid by the young president but Quackity heard it clear as day. He felt his own heart quicken at the thought of Technoblade begging for mercy - retribution and justice for all his wickedness. What would he give to see fear in those red eyes... God it would make him feel strong again. If he could kill Technoblade, he could deal with all the rest of his fucked up shit.

The board meeting was dismissed and contrary to their usual, Tubbo went off alone. Quackity went to follow, wrap up any fears or second-thoughts that the young president had but found no such conversation to hold with the boy.

They walked in silence, the two of them. Mindlessly, Quackity felt himself get smaller and smaller as the young president's gait turned into something driven and familiar. There was a familiar rage in Tubbo's eyes, the kind of pain-filled replacement that was an old friend to Quackity.

"Tubbo... we're doing the right thing - " he began slowly as he tried to pull the boy out of those depths. "I know," was the boy's only response.

It was terrifyingly familiar. Quackity felt his throat close as the quick dismissal, his footsteps falling unevenly as if he had taken a blow to the gut. He smelled alcohol, it clung to him like a sickness. It was on his clothes, in his hair, on his tongue, dancing on his warm breath like some sick reminder of the last person who could make him shut up. There was a low chuckle as someone's panted breath danced over his neck like the ghost of a memory that caught his chin and touched his lips.

Quackity had grabbed Tubbo's hand like it was some sort of weapon he could use to take the feeling away. He pulled Tubbo out of that trance-like march and forced the boy to look at him, mourning at the darkness in the boy's eyes.

There were horns, curling and cresting like nightmares come to life. They curled through Tubbo's soft brown curls and framed his brown face, their tips pointed towards Quackity's chest where two hearts beat; one in his chest and one in his stomach.

There was blood on his tongue, mixing with the alcohol and choking his words away like someone had him pinned against a wall with his throat in tow.

"What?"

Tubbo's demand was sharp and cruel, striking Quackity in his chest and carving through his beating heart, tearing it in two once more.

"Please," Quackity rasped. He forced himself to blink and meet Tubbo's large eyes. There were no horns... no Schlatt.

"Please what?" Tubbo tilted his head ever so slightly and Quackity felt his world spin.

What was he supposed to be begging for? Help? Ha, that was a fucking joke. They were all so fucked up there was no one left to help them. Was he asking Tubbo to stop looking so depressed - to stop being broken? That would be fucking rich from him. He was a kid - he had every right to be like this.

What was he asking!?

_"Use your fucking words, Quackity."_

The voice rang through Quackity's head like a haunting call, some sort of coo in his mind that felt like venom through his veins. Quackity felt his knees threaten to give out from under him.

" _Fucking loser, pull yourself together_ ," he tried to will himself.

"Don't just..." he pleaded, there were no words in his useless shit brain of his to explain what the hell he was begging for.

"Tubbo!" Dream's distant call was salvation and damnation all tied together with a pretty little green ribbon that wrapped around Quackity's throat and cleared his mind. He released Tubbo's hand as Tubbo's soft face lit up in the closest thing to a true smile Quackity had seen since Tommy's death.

"Hello, Dream!" Tubbo greeted warmly. "How are you?"

The masked man walked up beside Quackity. He always felt so... cold. Quackity glanced to his side and noticed how high Dream carried himself, his shoulders square and his head high.

Like he wasn't as fucked up as the rest of them. Like somehow he was above them.

Quackity found it in himself to stand up straight and hold his head just a little bit higher as he threw a glare at the masked man.

"I'm alright," Tubbo managed almost sheepishly as he rubbed the back of his head. "I told the cabinet about the plan, they're all on board."

Dream chuckled with some sort of counterfeit-warmth before reaching out and ruffling Tubbo's hair. There was something in Quackity that burned cold and furiously at that interaction.

"What are you doing in our country, Dream?" he demanded coldly.

Dream turned to look at him, almost as if he had just noticed the Vice President which only made Quackity's blood boil.

"Quackity!" Tubbo's cry out outrage was lost when Dream took a step closer to Quackity. They were close in height, but for some reason Dream just seemed to tower over Quackity, that smile of his tilting slightly as he regarded Quackity.

"Why? Am I not allowed in here?" Dream's stupid voice was so fake and sweet it would've given Quackity a tooth-ache if it was candy.

"You've caused a lot of hurt, Dream," Quackity began, Dream's stupid little humm cutting him off as the man leaned closer.

"So have you, Quackity, but now you're the Vice President. We've both chosen poorly. I'm doing my best to help Tubbo - to help him with L'Manburg," Dream explained simply.

Logic screamed that it had to be a lie - reminded Quackity that Dream had laughed when Manburg was blown to bits, reminded him of the joy in the bastard's voice as he dragged Tommy away from all of them, Tommy with his tearful eyes and angry screams.

Everything else in him was curling as he thought of Wilbur and Tommy fleeing L'Manburg as Schlatt's laugh rang in his ears, matching his own... 

Everything else was reminding him of how sad Dream had seemed after Tommy died. How he had coaxed Tubbo out of whatever darkness he'd been in - and that part felt guilty. That part made him feel small and stupid.

He was... so small..

So small on this stage.

He felt like curling up on himself and screaming himself close.

But Dream's little chuckle made him equip his tongue.

"I don't trust you, Dream," Quackity snarled like some sort of cornered animal, knowing he was snapping at a hunter who could kill him but relying on the fact that the man was a sadist and just loved to watched him struggle. "I don't trust you and no matter what happens - I don't think you'll ever be on our side!"

"Quackity - that's enough!" Tubbo shouted, anger and rage in his usually bright voice.

"That's... that's funny," Dream chortled.

"What?" demanded Quackity.

"Well, you make it sound like I'm picking L'Manburg when - well I never said anything like that," Dream supposed casually as he walked over to Tubbo and threw his arm around him. "I'm not on your side, Quackity. I'm on Tubbo's."

For the first time, Quackity took in the two of them. He saw the anger in Tubbo's eyes and how the boy was suddenly standing straighter with Dream's arm on his shoulders. He saw how Dream was slouching a bit to keep himself a bit closer to the boy...

He saw lines drawn in the sand and he saw one dividing him from the two of them...

And he felt like he was dying. Like that ribbon round his neck was growing taunt and it wasn't just Dream pulling on it - it was Tubbo too. Tubbo with his goat horns and cold glare, with his tongue that would soon smell of alcohol and his breath that would grow warm and loud.

"Quackity!" Tubbo snapped. "Dream is our ally. He gave us the information of Technoblade and he - he kept an eye on Tommy!"

"A LOT OF GOOD THAT DID!" Quackity spat with all of his anger and guilt and despair leaking into one well-formed barb that he threw right for Dream's heart.

And Dream seemed to stumble. For a moment Quackity saw Dream's high stance fumble and euphoria like nothing he'd experienced in a while filled his body, because he'd done it - he'd hurt Dream.

"Quackity."

The Vice looked back to Tubbo and felt all that happiness turn to cold terror at the boy's expression.

"May I talk to you, for a moment." Tubbo's words were ice to Quackity's fiery rage. They quenched his fire like being doused in ice water and the whole time the boy led him to a small alley he felt like he couldn't breathe. He smelled alcohol again and felt someone's warm breath on his neck.

He was ready for when Tubbo grabbed his shirt and pulled him a centimeter lower so that he had to look into the kid's furious brown eyes.

"What is wrong with you!?" Tubbo demanded.

"Wh-what do you mean?" Quackity deflected with a nervous laugh.

"You're - You're completely out of line!" Tubbo cried. "You had no right to do that! No right!"

"You can't seriously trust him, Tubbo - " Quackity tried to reason.

"I do!" Tubbo cried. "He's proved he's trying to help and he's done a wonderful job! You were the one who wanted to kill Technoblade in the first place! I - I figured if anyone would show him at least a sliver of respect - it would be you!"

"Show Dream respect!?" Quackity spat the word out like it was filth, which it was when paired with that smiling bastard. "Tubbo, he's the reason Tommy was exiled in the first place!"

"SHUT UP!" Tubbo screamed, surprising the both of them.

Quackity took an unsteady step back as Tubbo quickly wiped away the tears in his eyes. Quackity saw the tears - but he also saw the horns.

"You _will_ respect Dream while he's helping us," Tubbo managed shakily. "You can show at least a _bit_ of restraint. Right?"

The boy didn't wait for an answer as he turned on his heel and fled the scene, tears falling down his face. It left Quackty rattled and shaking like those words had taken his insides and scrambled them up in some sort of jigsaw puzzle that he couldn't put back together. Quackity felt bile rise in his throat as he stood there, his mind failing him as his heart ached and raced.

He stumbled out of the space between the two houses and leaned on one of their wooden walls to keep himself upright. He looked down the boardwalk and saw Dream and Tubbo walking away. Dream had a hand on Tubbo's back and seemed to be supporting the young president who was still wiping his eyes.

That had been Quackity's job not too long ago.

What had happened?

Quackity stumbled all the way home, vile poison in his mind and bile in his throat. He just barely remembered reaching the cabinet before pulling out a bottle and pouring a glass that quickly made it past his lips.

He hated alcohol.. he hated it. He did. He absolutely did.

He hated the warmth it gave him as it traveled down his throat, biting his lips and curling around his tongue as it held him in warm arms and murmured to him with his rough voice. He hated it - he hated him.

He hated Schlatt. He did, he did, he did... he had to. 

His lips tingled and his heart ached as he felt another heart other than his own beating in his stomach. Blood was rising in his throat, bringing Schlatt's heart with it. Tears fell down his face, someone was cupping his face and laughing at him - but then they were gone. The laugh was falling in tandem with the heart in his chest as he tried to scream.

He had to get it out - it needed to get out.

He somehow reached the toilet where he retched and heaved, desperate to get Schlatt's heart out. He could only taste blood on his tongue. He closed his eyes and saw Tubbo with Schlatt's horns and Dream's smile. He saw the wedding ring on his finger even though he'd thrown it away months ago - it was burned into his skin like some sort of brand.

Desperate to get the blood out of his mouth, he reached for the bottle he'd left on the bathroom sink and didn't even both to pour a cup. He put the bottle to his lips and drank until the blood was gone and the heart stopped beating as his ring faded from view - till it all faded from view.

When Karl and Sapnap found him they must've brought him to bed. They probably scoured the whole house for any other bottles to throw away (he'd just buy more anyway). They must've cleaned him up and gotten him in his nightwear. They must've taken so much time and wasted it on him because when he woke up he was on their couch laying on Sapnap's chest with Karl's head on his shoulders, Karl's honey-colored hair soft under his cheek, and Sapnap's body unnaturally warm and welcoming.

He tried to rasp out an apology, tried to defend what the hell had happened but could only curl in on himself as warm tears of shame poured out of his eyes. Karl was asleep but his breaths were so gentle - so pure and even. He shouldn't touch him - should put all his fucked up baggage on Karl's shoulders. It only made him cry a little louder which he hated himself for - he'd wake them out.

Sapnap, who must have never even fallen asleep, hushed him softly and pressed a kiss to the crown of his head. Every part of Sapnap was warm and safe and as wrapped Quackity in his arms, it was easy to try and feel okay.

"I'm sorry," Quackity sobbed quietly, pressing his face in Sapnap's chest.

"It's okay," Sapnap lied.

But it wasn't... it wasn't...

~~~

Techno spent hours improving his tools, upgraded armor, and layering hefty enchantments over it, spiking his dark chest plate with thorny implants, burning fire runes into his sword, sharpening and reinforcing until he was certain everything was perfect. 

Tommy called him crazy (though it may have been affectionate - hard to tell with that kid); crazy for spending so much time on that stuff. Those dim eyes watched him as he worked, insulting and criticizing him all the way with that stupid mouth of his. They spent hours in the forge, sweating in the heat and throwing insults back and forth like old friends. There were times Tommy would gaze into the fire for a bit too long for Techno's liking, and when that happened the voices would scream for Techno to do something. He'd throw the kid some sword to sharpen or make him go fetch a tool, which would earn him a few more minutes of lively banter.

He understood why Phil liked the kid. Tommy was spirited (stupid) and bright, weirdly smart in somethings (absolutely foolish in others).

When Techno handed him the new armor he'd constructed he watched Tommy's eyes light up in wonder and pure joy.

_"If it comes to you deciding between me and Tommy, you need to go save Tommy."_

Techno swallowed the rage swelling in him like the sea - because Philza can't ask him to do that. Phil can't expect him to choose...

"Thanks, Big man," Tommy laughed as he strapped on the last of the armor. "How do I look?"

Techno only huffed in response, some relief in his chest because at least now Tommy could defend himself. He looked good adorned in the dark metal, somewhat normal.

If he was smart, he'd never have to choose... he'd never have to admit that he lied when he told Phil he would put Tommy first.

And he wouldn't have to lose Tommy... not that it mattered anyway, right?

"It looks great!" Ranboo offered happily as the tall hybrid took in Tommy's new armor.

"Right? Fucking badass!" Tommy grinned.

"Now get your sword," Techno ordered.

"What, why?" Tommy asked.

"Because you suck with swordplay," Techno gruffed.

That ruffled Tommy's feathers. "Oh you know what, fuck you, you think you're such a big shot don't you - "

"You're getting lessons, let's go," Techno ordered as he walked out the lower level's door.

He didn't turn to see Tommy's expression, which was probably something between awe and happiness, his dim eyes would be sparkling just a little bit, and Techno would remember when he had looked at Phil like that - with happy eyes and an eager expression...

Because Tommy was like him ( _no_ \- NO!)

He growled as he trudged through the snow. The voices cooing and taunting him with futures and jeers.

That's all anyone seemed to do - taunt him.

"Bring it on Big Man!" Tommy laughed from behind him.

"Be careful!" Phil's voice warned from an upper window where the smell of stew wafted into the tundra. He was likely busy with Ghostbur compiling some sort of concoction for dinner that Tommy would complain over.

Techno breathed in the cold air and found some solace here. He turned to Tommy and held up his sword.

"Now, Tommy... let's see what you've got."

Tommy smirked in response and lunged.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trauma! Trauma! Trauma!  
> *Hugs Quackity*  
> Child, you deserve the world.
> 
> Thanks so much for all the support guys, your comments give me LIFE! Please feel free to leave more because I LOVE seeing you guys rant. Anyways, hope you guys are still enjoying it!


	13. Entangled Connections

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I got slapped with inspiration, people, and so I wrote more angst than I planned to because I'm a terrible person.  
> Look at that fluff...  
> Oh no I made it angsty.  
> Oh - but look at that brotherly interaction between Techno and Ranboo!!  
> Oh no... I added more plot.  
> Whoops~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: There's a pretty bad panic attack in here so.. be careful. I'm probably done putting trigger warnings in because the tags explain everything but the last thing I want to do is hurt someone so... just stay safe, kay? Get help. Take care of yourself. Drink water. Eat food. Sleep. Don't make me be a Mom friend.
> 
> ALSO - feel free to gimme kudos and comments. I want clout and your opinion (anything you like, anything you hate, etc...). Y'all can share this with people too - just don't, like, claim it as your own - cause that's cringe.

Tommy had found... warmth.

After so long in the damp and cold loneliness of exile, he'd forgotten what it was to be warm, which was strange. Here, he was surrounded by nothing but ice and cold that numbed his senses, but somehow it all made him feel warm and... _alive_. 

He spent mornings out in that brisk air with his breath clouding his vision and his throat being bitten by the ice in the air. He spent mornings with armor straps pinching his shoulders and chest. He spent mornings with a sword in his hands, rubbing against his callused hands and weighing in his arms as he exchanged blows with Techno.

Not just blows - words.

He found himself _taunting_ Techno. Taunting him! Like an idiot. The Blood Lord could've killed him a thousand times over in these little skirmishes - Tommy certainly had been knocked into the snow enough to give him the opportunity. But instead, Techno always helped him back up, critiquing his footing or his stance before putting the boy's sword back in Tommy's uncertain hands and getting back to work.

Tommy found himself speaking before he could hold his tongue. He insulted and mocked and jeered, always recoiled afterward because it was that attitude that pushed people away and left him alone, but he still did it...

And Techno never left.

Techno always threw such words right back at him with a smile and a snicker, insulting his swordsmanship or his posture or some other shit that was so fucking pretentious...

But he never left.

He helped Tommy get back up again and again. Tommy would charge, swing his sword and, if he was lucky, would get a few blows in before landing heavily with a new bruise.

And then Techno would give him praise (be it in the most Techno-Bladish way possible) that would make something in Tommy's chest flicker in excitement.

"Wow! You're almost not sucking, nerd!" Techno laughed once as he shook the arm that Tommy's sword had bounced off.

"SHUT UP! God, you're so annoying!" Tommy retorted before he could stop himself (he didn't physically recoil at least as the words left his lips). A smile broke over both of their faces.

"Ha!" Techno lunged and knocked him off his feet and laughed as Tommy's face slammed into the snow.

"Bitch boy!" Tommy shouted as he spat snow out of his mouth. Techno only laughed like the little shit he was... before Tommy pelted him in the face with a snowball. The shock on the Blood Lord's face was enough to make Tommy throw back his head and laugh. The undignified hybrid sputtered and wiped snow out of his face.

Techno glared at him and for a moment that shut Tommy up. Fuck had he taken it too far, did Techno hate him now?

The literal mountain-ton of snow that smacked his face suggested otherwise, especially as Techno's cackled broke through the air.

Tommy sputtered as he furiously wiped away the burning ice crystals on his face, smiling as he blindly grabbed another handful of snow. He threw it blindly and heard Techno's jeer.

"What was that? I was miles away!" Techno taunted.

Even with his nose running and turning numb, with his fingers tingling and his lips chapping, he still felt warm. He wiped snow out of his eyes and threw another and then another. Techno jeered and dodged, returning fire without hesitation.

They must've continued on like that for a while before a rogue snowball went and pelted Techno in the face, sticking to Techno's hair like a crown of frost.

Both of them froze and looked over to a snowdrift where Philza stood, wings raised as he held two icy globs in his hand and a smile on his face. Behind him, Ranboo stood covered in thick layers of fur, compacting snow into more ammunition with his thick gloves and a small little smile, his tail twitching happily as he took shelter under Philza's wings. They must've seen the fight and decided that they were not going to be simple bystanders.

"Philza... you're betraying me!?" Techno's false hurt made Tommy snort.

"Get em' Phil!" Ghostbur's voice rang out from the upstairs window where the ghost was watching eagerly.

"All's fair in war, Techno," Philza threatened as he readied a snowball.

"TAKE COVER!" Tommy cried to no one in particular as he dove for a snowbank. It was freezing in there, making every inch of his body tremble and shiver but he was laughing so hard he hardly noticed. He laughed and laughed as Philza pelted Techno mercilessly as the ruined Blood Lord desperately enlisted Tommy into building a snow fort where they could return fire.

This was so stupid - so fucking stupid (and it was so fucking cold) but Tommy felt like he was flying. The sun was bright and the snow was gleaming and everything was just so stupid and pretty and -

Even when Ranboo's snowball hit him in the face (though softly because that kid apparently had _no_ upper arm strength) he smiled and just returned the fire. Ranboo yelped and dove behind Philza's wings for cover as Tommy's retribution chased him in the form of frozen snow spheres.

"Sorry, Tommy!" Ranboo cried. "In my defense - I didn't think that would hit you!"

"YOU'RE SO FUCKING DEAD RANBOO!" Tommy laughed as he packed together another ball.

He peeked over the fort and saw Philza raise his other wing to block a fearsome snowball that had been thrown viciously. Phil smirked over to where Techno was peering over a snowdrift, his human form melted away into his piggish snout and a wicked grin.

"USING WINGS FOR SHIELDS PHILZA!?" Techno laughed dangerously.

"Don't act like you aren't using your form to stay warm!" Philza retorted as he took a snowball from Ranboo and chucked another one. "Weather-proof Pig!"

Techno cackled as he risked running from his drift over to Tommy's base while under enemy fire. He dodged Phil's snowball and skidded over until he was sitting beside's Tommy, his breaths heavy and thick in the cold wind but his red eyes gleaming with the love of competition.

"He's using his unfair advantages! Curse him! We'll just have to utilize his weakness! No worries guys, he's a wounded old man, we can take him!" Techno snickered to seemingly no one - maybe he was just talking to Tommy. He did have the weird thing where he regarded himself in the third person sometimes.

"Chill, chill Techno!" Tommy laughed as he packed together another snowball. His cheeks stung from the cold and he couldn't feel his nose anymore - but god he was all warm.

"What's wrong Techno!? Getting chilly!?" Philza taunted, his voice rising into the big blue above.

"NEVER!" Techno laughed boisterously as he popped up above the bank and chucked another snowball, one that smacked Philza right in his face.

The divine survivor slowly wiped the ice off his face and smiled dangerously, his blue eyes glowing like the sunny sky above.

"Oh, it's fucking _on_ then!"

~~~

It was near dusk when they finally retired their warzone and trudged back up the steps into the cottage, laughing their asses off like there were a bunch of drunken teenagers, covered in ice and chilled to the bone. Phil's wings were coated in ice, his feathers stuck in terribly frozen clumps, Techno's pig-like appearance had frost clinging to every bit of him, Tommy's hair seemed to be permanently frozen in some terrible hairdo. The only one untouched was Ranboo and even then his thick clothing had splotches of ice from renegade snowballs. All of their faces were red and wind-bitten, their noses were running, and their eyelashes seemed to be frosted too.

Ghostbur laughed as they walked in.

"That looked so great!" he cheered as he clapped his hands. His legs and feet materialized so he could walk up and mingle with them. Friend gave out a half-hearted baa as they trotted over and tried to check the frozen group for any food.

"Okay, right... everybody over by the fire. Get warmed up. Anyone have wet clothes?" Phil asked as he shook out his icy hair and began to unbutton his thick coat. "If so, change and hang em' up by the fire."

Tommy nodded and began to take off his coat too, letting out a yelp as the ice that was coated on the fur lining slipped down his back.

"SHIT!" he yelped which made everyone laugh.

They brushed the snow off their skin and out of their hair. Phil quickly set about preening his wings and laughing as Techno complained about the snow frozen to his hair. Tommy laughed as he hung up his coat and put his gloves near the fire. Phil nagged them all about getting into dry clothes, eventually forsaking his preening to make sure everyone was getting warm.

He mothered them like a fucking hen until Tommy finally pushed him off and went to sit next to Ranboo who was already comfy by the fire and was making conversation with Edward. The fire was wonderful to his frosted skin, but he couldn't help but grin as he noticed that his chest was still warm. He felt alive - was this how he was always supposed to feel? When was the last time he'd done absolutely nothing for most of the day? When's the last time he'd played that hard...

It had to be at some point before fucking L'Manburg, honestly, when he and Tubbo had - 

Oh.

He didn't feel so warm now.

He shivered and hugged his chest as he scooted closer to the fire, sniffing as his stupid nose continued to run.

"Cold?" Ranboo asked as he offered to shared the thick wool blanket he was using (it smelled like woodsmoke and pine needles).

Tommy snickered as he grabbed the corner and wrapped it around himself. "Thanks."

"You're welcome!" Ranboo chirped.

Edward chirped something in response.

"Oh - no, we can share - don't worry!" Ranboo assured the monstrosity with a warm smile.

"Hey, you think you can teach me to speak Enderman or some shit?" Tommy asked.

Ranboo gave him a blank expression. "Uh... oh geez, I never considered teaching someone - I guess that means I'd have to remember how to speak it."

"Wh-what do you mean you don't know!?" Tommy cried. "You just talked to fucking Edward."

"No, he just talked to me," Ranboo answered puzzledly.

Well, that just started a whole other conversation. Tommy ranted and argued, smiling at Ranboo's confused retorts and somewhat-witty remarks. He rubbed his running nose and wrapped the blanket even closer around him as a chill came over him, still laughing at Ranboo's shenanigans. They sat there, warming by the fire as Phil and Techno went to the kitchen and prepared something for dinner (It was probably soup - seemed to be the only thing these people could fucking eat - that, steak, and fucking golden apples or some rich-people shit).

Tommy was laughing over one of his own stupid jokes when someone strummed a guitar.

Tommy felt like the earth fell out from under him. He looked over his shoulders and found Ghostbur holding a guitar he'd dismounted from the wall - Wilbur's old guitar. Not the one he'd brought to L'Manburg or the one he'd constructed the national anthem on, but the one that had hung up in their old house. The one he'd composed lullabies on and sang stupid parodies on. The one with a crack down the back and an A-String that never sat in tune. The one with the dent in the shoulder where Tommy had knocked it into the wall, the one with green finger paint staining the bottom curve from where Tubbo had touched it without washing his hands.

Funny, he'd never noticed it on the wall before - why the hell did Techno even have it hanging up? How did Techno get it?

... Phil probably.

Ghostbur handled the wooden instrument delicately, almost like he was holding a baby. He pulled some of his dark grey wispy hair out of his eyes and settled down beside Friend, holding it in the familiar cradling position as he ran his fingers over the atrociously out-of-tune strings.

"I know this," Ghostbur murmured softly as he ran his hand along the neck.

Ranboo had fallen silent and was looking back at what Tommy was entranced by. Tommy knew he shouldn't stare but as the ghost began to twist the pegs and tune the strings he couldn't bear to look away.

When the ghost got to the A string, he chortled as he watched the peg slip.

"That one never did stay in place," he reminisced before jumping to the G string. Soon he was strumming chords and then plucking strings before his eyes narrowed and he played a small tune. It was harmless really, just a few chord progressions and a fumbling arpeggio that were obviously put together by an immature musician who hadn't yet grasped the complexities of the minor scales... but it made Tommy feel like he couldn't breathe.

He couldn't breathe because... because it wasn't Ghostbur there anymore - it was Wilbur. Wilbur with his bright smile and quirky little voice, his unsure fingers that fumbled on the strings, and his cracking teenage voice that was still somehow so incredibly enticing and alluring. Wilbur who used to lay Tommy down, tuck him in, and sit by the doorway to strum his a song. The Wilbur who would make him stupid stuffed animals that were always _so_ fucking ugly with mix-matched buttons for eyes and messy stuffing jobs. The Wilbur who would bring him and Tubbo to fields to see the bees and sing about the sky and the grass as Tommy fell asleep next to him in the bright sun. Wilbur.

He bolted for the ladder and raced up it before his stupid tears could ruin the day. He climbed as fast as he could hoping he could outrun the sobs in his throat that were trying to break free. 

Stupid. Stupid. _Stupid_.

He was supposed to be fine! He was supposed to be okay now! It had been months - he _should_ be fine! Why was he so fucking weak!? Why was he going to ruin this stupid night by being a stupid brat?

He reached his bed and barely made it before a sob broke through the floodgates and almost breached his lips. He shoved his face in a pillow and hissed in anger and pain because _fuck_ , it still hurt and he was such a fucking baby; _why was he like this_!?

Wilbur was _dead_. Wilbur was _gone_. It didn't matter anymore - it _shouldn't_ matter anymore! 

But he couldn't stop thinking of Wilbur's soft voice as it wafted into his ears with his hand stroking his hair on those late nights with the crickets at the window and Tubbo's snores filling the bedroom.

_"You're my right-hand man, Tommy."_

DAMMIT!

Tommy punched his pillow and muffled another sob. Pathetic. He was so fucking pathetic...

"Tommy?" Wilbur's lilting voice drew Tommy away from those thoughts for just a moment. He shakily looked up from the pillow and looked over.

Wilbur was there with a concerned expression, he knelt down beside his bed and reached out like he was going to ruffle his hair.

"Will?" Tommy choked, desperately reaching out to grab those hands because he didn't know how his brother was there but if he was back he couldn't let him go again.

"Tommy, are you okay?" Wilbur began - his hands phasing right through Tommy's.

Betrayal and shame burned in Tommy's throat as reality crashed in. His tears spewed thicker, rolling down his face like molten rock, feeding the rage choking him.

It wasn't Wilbur - it was Ghostbur. 

Wilbur was _dead_. He and all of his madness and cruelty and all that bullshit he'd done at the end, all of that was gone - all that was left was Ghostbur. There were no more villains, no more explosives, no more glares or jeers or taunts or songs or hugs or stories or -

"GO AWAY!" Tommy yelled viciously as he flung his pillow at the apparition. In went right through the ghost and slammed into the dresser behind him.

Ghostbur's eyes flickered for a moment in something between guilt and fear. It made Tommy's gut twist viciously before it plummeted to his toes.

_"You hurt everyone around you, Tommy."_

Dream was at his ear with an arm around his shoulder. His tone was like ice to Tommy's warmth, extinguishing in completely and leaving him shivering with a running nose and a sobbing throat.

Ghostbur was retreated back down the ladder with a shameful expression leaving Tommy alone with Dream - Tommy couldn't breathe. He tried to scream, tried to fight but he was tangled in that stupid web and Dream was right there. He could hear his voice and feel his hold.

"Wait..." he tried to beg as Ghostbur disappeared from view - he'd pushed him away. He'd pushed him away and he was alone now. He was alone with _Dream_.

He grabbed the sheets on his bed and hid his face in them as he let out a ragged scream. He wanted to hide! Get away, escape, ANYTHING! But Dream was there and he couldn't get escape...

He hated this - he hated this!

"Tommy! TOMMY!" someone was calling out but Tommy didn't want them. He'd push them away, he'd hurt them, they'd leave, they'd hurt him.

"Go away," he croaked.

_"I'll never leave you, Tommy. We're friends."_

Dream was right next to him, leaning into his ear. Tommy sobbed louder. He couldn't stop this - he couldn't do anything!

"GO AWAY!" he screamed.

Dream tried to grab him. Tried to pull him into one of those hugs (not hug - hold. The hold that held him in place, that kept him still and docile and helpless and he _hated_ it).

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" He thrashed as he begged and screamed. He had to get away. He had to get away!

He tried to scramble away, anywhere, anywhere other than here. The hands holding him released him and he scrambled to the corner of the room. There was nowhere to go, nowhere to run! 

He wanted to scratch at the wood and break it down. Tear the planks apart to escape but it was hopeless, Dream would grab him and pull him away before he got too far. He pressed his body as close to the wood as he could and sobbed as he curled in on himself.

"Please... please..." he had to beg, had to hope Dream would forgive him. He was so fucking useless. So pathetic. He hid his ugly face and wiped at the snot but it was so fucking hard to breathe.

"Tommy... Tommy I won't touch you. It's okay. I need you to breathe," Dream instructed gently.

It was a lie - It had to be a lie. Dream wasn't his friend. Dream _wasn't_ his friend!

"Tommy... look at me," the instruction was gentle... but it was a demand, and Dream hated being ignored.

Tommy choked on a sob and forced his eyes to open. 

Blue eyes met his... Blue... not green eyes or black dots on a white mask. Blue...

"Phil?" he asked.

Why was Phil here?

"Tommy," Dream's voice was in Phil's lips and Tommy found his vision blurring. "Tommy, breathe."

"I... I can't, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'll be better - "

"Shhh, you're okay, you're okay... look at me Tommy, it's me, it's Phil. You know me."

Tommy found himself hyperventilating, every inhale coming like a jump of his lungs. He had to listen - he needed to listen or he'd get hurt. He tried to grab his lungs and force them to work slower but his damn chest was in the way so he ended up just clenching his thick clothes, his fingers not able to get past his armor.

His armor.

Fuck, fuck, _fuck_. 

He desperately tried to make his useless fucking fingers undo the straps on the armor (what the hell was he thinking!? Why did he have armor!?). His fingers were still numb from the cold and fumbled uselessly with the leather straps. He whimpered uselessly as he failed to get his shoulder pads off.

"Tommy... listen to me," Dream's voice was still soft but it was going to get sharp soon if Tommy didn't fucking hurry up!

"I'm sorry," he pleaded. He needed to buy time - he needed to -

"Can you tell me five things you can see?" Dream asked gently.

 _Why?_ Tommy swallowed the question and recoiled as he tried to make his vision work. He couldn't fucking breathe. He grabbed at his chest and held his breath for a moment before letting it out, tears streaming down his face, mixing with his snot as his breath broke up into little gasps. He tried - he really did, he tried so fucking hard to breathe so he could look and listen, so he could be good. It was takings so long - Dream was going to snap any minute now.

"It's okay, Tommy. You're doing great," Dream praised. That was good - he had time then. Time before Dream snapped.

Tommy viciously wiped at his eyes as his breaths fell into a more controllable mess of gasps. He managed to clear his vision enough to register some of his surroundings. Five things... five things...

"Amor," he choked - a hidden plea of forgiveness.

"Good, what else?" Dream encouraged.

Tommy choked and looked beyond his armor to the wooden floor below him that he had collapsed on.

"Wood," he whimpered. "Wood..."

"That's two," Dream praised. Tommy dared his eyes to travel a bit across the wooden floor to Dream's boots, taking in the fur lining that was soft and white.

"Fur..."

"Mmhmm."

That wasn't Dream's hum. Tommy's gaze drifting up from the fur-lined slippers to the long cloak of grey and light blue, up to the gentle face framed with blonde hair and the soft blue eyes that stared at him.

"Phil?" Tommy choked.

"Hi Toms," Phil breathed, his hands forcefully clamped in his lap like he had been forcing himself to sit still. His wings were pressed against his back, but their icy-feathers were puffed up, still messy from their snowball fight from earlier - he never did get a chance to finish preening.

"Phil..." Tommy felt shame crash into him and bring warm tears to his face. "Phil... I'm sorry."

He fucked everything up. He fucked it all up. They'd had a good day and he fucked it up - 

"That's four... how about number five?" Phil encouraged.

Tommy forced himself to breathe and furiously wiped his tears. 

"I'm sorry... I'm sorry, I didn't mean to - I just - "

"Stay with me, Tommy. Another thing you can see," Phil urged.

Tommy sniffed and nodded as he blinked. "Wings... your wings..."

"Good," Phil smiled. "Good... four things you can touch."

"What?" Tommy whimpered. "Look, I'm sorry..."

"You're okay, Tommy," Phil promised. "I just want you to stay with me."

"M-my clothes. The wall. The... the floor... the... I don't know - the fucking air..." 

Philza smiled in relief? was it relief?

"Tommy... can I touch you?" Philza was asking for permission and while Tommy's chest screamed to hold Philza, the rest of his was burning in shame because he was safe and he always had been safe but he'd... he'd fucked it up. He curled in on himself as the two sides went to war, the side that longer to hug Phil and sob like a child and the side that was aflame with guilt and shame.

He hugged his knees and wiped his eyes, refusing to look Philza in the eyes for a second longer than he needed to. His breathing was normal now but his chest felt tired.

"Do you... want me to go?" Philza asked uncertainly.

Yes... Yes, Philza should go. He should get as far away from Tommy as he could before Tommy hurt him more. Before he ruined everything. He hugged his knees tighter and swallowed the fear that was building at the thought of being alone.

"I... can go," Philza admitted softly. "Whatever makes you comfortable."

Tommy squeezed his eyes shut and tried to ignore that pain eating his chest up as he heard Philza's wings rustle as the man went to leave. It was good he was leaving - it was good it was good it was - 

He was desperately scrambling after him before he could control himself and had grabbed a handful of feathers desperately as a sob clung to his throat.

"I'm sorry," he breathed... because he wasn't strong enough to be alone - he was going to hurt Philza because he wasn't strong enough - because he was pathetic.

Feathers slipped from his grasp as Phil turned and wrapped his strong arms around Tommy like he was some sort of feathered shield. Tommy tried to resist the relief but inevitably melted into a puddle of tears and stupid blubbering as he punched at Philza's chest because here he was again - relying on others because he was too fucking weak and too fucking broken and useless and pitiful -

"You're okay," Philza told him. "I promise, you're okay."

"I'm sorry," was all Tommy could whimper.

"You have nothing to apologize for," Philza left no room for debate. "This is not your fault."

"I'm _sorry_..."

Philza's hand cradled the back of Tommy's head as he pressed a kiss into the crown of Tommy's head. Tommy wasn't sure how he was able to fit all of his long limbs into Philza's hold but the survivor somehow managed to wrap him up in a cocoon of feathers and arms until he was all warm and held and _safe_.

"You're okay. Dream's not here - " Philza swore.

"He is," Tommy cried in a ragged breath. He held his head and pulled on his hair as he felt that shadow in the back of his mind with its taunting smile. He wished he could pull that stupid mask out of his mind where it had taken root. "He's in here..."

Philza looked at him with such a sad expression that Tommy was sure he was about to start sobbing again. Philza pulled Tommy back into his chest and tightened his hold ever so slightly.

"That's not your fault. You will be okay. This will get better," Philza swore.

"No... no, it won't."

"It will... I promise Tommy. You've got to stop blaming yourself for this. You are not at fault, mate."

"... I yelled at Ghostbur," Tommy confessed.

"You were upset," Philza defended.

"I threw a pillow at him..."

Philza chucked. "Somehow... I think he'll forgive you for that."

"I thought he was Wilbur." Tommy waited for the response and instead found Phil holding him tighter. He couldn't help himself, the words just seemed to spew from his lips. "I thought he was Wilbur and I... I got fucking pissed and shit and I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. I'm - I just miss him and I know it's stupid and I'm sorry - "

"It is _not_ stupid," Philza promised firmly. "I still miss him too..."

Philza's words were a sort of soft shamed confession.

"Yeah..." Tommy's voice cracked. "But you don't, like, starts sobbing and shit, like a fucking baby..."

"I do," Philza murmured softly. "I've cried. I've cried because it hurts. You have every right to hurt and you have every right to cry. Okay?"

Tommy bit his lip.

"Okay?" Philza urged gently.

"Fuck you," Tommy managed, earning a chuckle from Phil.

They sat there for a few moments, Philza's warmth seeping back into Tommy like some sort of weird fireplace. His heart stopped hammering as his chest relaxed ever so slight, still sore and tight but nothing like the cage it had been earlier to his panicked lungs.

"Are you feeling better? Is there anything - "Phil began.

"Can we just - " Tommy wanted to ask if they could just stay like this. But that was a fucking stupid question... there were other people in the house and he shouldn't be selfish (he always was selfish) and he couldn't keep demanded Phil's attention like a spoiled child or a needy brat or - 

"Of course, mate," Phil whispered gently as he rearranged himself gently and continued to hold Tommy. "Of course."

Tommy buried his face in Phil's shirt and took a long breath... Phil was always warm.

~~~

Ranboo was... happy.

Which was weird because he was being housed by his country's biggest enemy who was currently housing an exiled criminal along with a secretly traitorous citizen of L'Manburg... Oh, and the ghost of the country's first president who blew it up... and that president's blue sheep.

It was all just weird.

He had thrown a snowball at Technoblade today - that had been weird too.

There was just so much strangeness permeating through the air that it left Ranboo feeling like he was dreaming. It was a wonderful dream though. He got to see Tommy smile and laugh as the old Tommy had. He got to see Technoblade smile and cackle like he was a human being and not the epitome of violence and destruction. He saw Philza truly content and peaceful, smiling with bright eyes and a glowing heart. He saw Ghostbur belonging, boldly speaking and rarely being pushed aside. He saw himself being welcomed and warmed by this strange little light in the middle of the tundra.

Here, people mattered. Here, it seemed the only priority was fellow people.

The only clue that this wasn't a wonderful dream were the bad parts. The parts when Tommy woke up screaming with night terrors or fell into some sort of dark daydream that left him sobbing and apologizing. The parts when Techno's eyes gleamed like blood and sent him out in the snow, returning with blood on his hands and a cruel expression. The parts when Philza winced from a broken rib or cursed late at night, visions of vengeance in his blue eyes. The parts when Ghostbur looked like he was going to cry before putting on a smile and handing everyone some blue...

The parts when Ranboo remembered he couldn't stay here.

Tubbo still needed him. L'Manburg was still his home. He couldn't just leave it - right?

Gods, Tubbo didn't even know Tommy was alive. He was probably still crying on Dream's shoulder - the thought made him sick. He'd found out one of his friends was safe from the masked demon only to remember that another was going down the same path. Dream just seemed to have his hands in everything, pulling everyone's strings and hanging them up like little puppets and broken dolls. Ranboo hated it... but he didn't know how to stop it.

Why was he so useless!?

" _Are you well, small one?_ " Edward was a great part of this dream-like future. He was always kind. The enderman's eyes were trained on the fire (he called it the living one or something like that) but his words were for Ranboo.

"Yeah..." Ranboo sighed. He looked up at the ceiling and wondered what was happening between Phil and Tommy. The sobbing and screaming had stopped... so that was good. Ghostbur was downstairs - he had looked sad and the blue in his hands had stained his yellow shirt.

" _Why the darkness_?"

"Oh... umm..." Ranboo scratched the back of his head and sighed. "I'm just confused I guess."

" _This is a new term. What does it mean_?"

"Confused? Oh... um... that's a good... hmm... conflicted, I guess. Yeah, I just... I don't know what to do."

" _This, I understand. What causes such conflict in such a small one?_ "

"I... well... I've got friends, right. And some of them say that Technoblade should die because he'd bad. But Technoblade has been protecting Tommy and I like Tommy and if Technoblade dies then... well I'll feel really bad. I don't think he deserves to die! I just... I don't want to pick a side but I don't know what to do."

" _Factions are troubling matters. Hard to choose between them when both are justified._ "

"Exactly! I wish we didn't have sides! So much could be fixed! So much hurt could've... it just would've been better."

" _What faction would support your neutrality?_ "

"What?" Ranboo asked.

" _If you wish to avoid the choosing of factions, then consider which faction would seek you harm and avoid them._ "

"So... pick... pick a side?"

" _Choose a haven. Consider it as such. Not a position in a faction, but a haven from harm. Do not actively work against the said harmful faction but find sanctuary in the tolerant one_ "

"What side would hurt me if I stayed neutral? I... I don't know... I.. I think Quackity would probably..."

_"It's L'Manburg or Technoblade. You can't choose both."_

"I think L'Manburg would probably be angry with me if they knew I was here..." Ranboo admitted, pulling a blanket around him.

" _Would they seek you harm, small one_?"

Would they? Ranboo didn't... he wasn't sure. Quackity probably would - but would Tubbo allow it? Tubbo who was gentle and kind and sweet and... and a friend of Dream. Dream who hurt Tommy and who hurt Phil and who probably wanted to hurt Ranboo. Dream who had already convinced Tubbo to turn against Tommy.

"Maybe..." Ranboo choked.

" _Then remain here_ ," Edward stated simply in a syllable. " _Where you are safe_."

Ranboo put his head in his hands and sighed. "But I care about people there. I care about Tubbo - I can't just abandon him! Dream's gonna hurt him and twist all of them. I can't just let him win!"

" _This... dark one you mention - they are dangerous_?"

Ranboo laughed mirthlessly as he thought of the blank smiling face. "Yeah... you could say that."

" _They will harm your close ones_?"

"He already hurt Tommy... He hurt a lot of people..."

" _They are the reason the young one screams under the moon? They are the darkness responsible for the bloodied one's anger?_ "

"Yeah..." Ranboo croaked. "Dream did that to Tommy... He's... Techno probably doesn't like him much either."

" _The one with the false face_."

Ranboo looked up to Edward and nodded. "Yeah... you know him?"

" _The Queen's thrall is known to all... their oath binds them to us. Their false face is known to many. They are dark, small one, there is much darkness under their false face. If your close ones are under their false gaze, you take great risk to save them_."

"I can't just let Dream get them!" Ranboo cried. "And what did all of that mean!?"

" _Tread carefully, small one. The false faced one is clever_."

"I - I'm trying to be careful - but I don't know what to do!" Ranbo pulled at his hair and felt his chest grow tight.

"Please don't stress Edward out, he's very susceptible to anxiety," Techno's voice broke through Ranboo's clouded beginnings of panic. He turned to see the piglin hybrid in his human form, standing at the door with a strange sort of smile on his face, his eyebrow cocked at the interaction.

"Oh... hi Techno," Ranboo greeted sheepishly.

"Hallo," Techno smiled. He looked up the ladder and back to Ranboo. "Any word on how Tommy's doing?"

"No..." Ranboo murmured.

Techno hummed with a simple nod.

"You hungry? I've got soup in the kitchen," Techno asked as he trudged over.

"Not... really," Ranboo sighed.

"Yeah, me either," Techno nodded as he sat down in a nearby chair.

" _This dark bloodied one is reasonable. Stay here, small one. Better the darkness that protects than the darkness that hunts_ ," those were Edwards's final words in the conversation as the enderman looked back to the fire and settled down, his purple eyes glazing over as he quickly fell asleep. Ranboo sighed and internalized that advice for a moment. He fiddled with his claws and looked over to Techno who had pulled a book out of a chest and had put on his reading glasses.

"Technoblade..." Ranboo managed.

"Hmm?" the hybrid looked up, his red eyes waiting patiently.

"Uh... L'Manburg..." Ranboo began.

Immediately those red eyes darkened.

"Yeah, what about it?"

"They're... they're planning to kill you," Ranboo spat out.

Techno's eyebrows raised, he almost looked unimpressed. He adjusted his reading glasses and settled back down.

"That's nice," he shrugged.

"What!?" Ranboo sputtered. "I mean, they've got plans and costumes and - and they're serious."

"Sure~" Techno rolled his eyes and shook his head. "When those kids find a real fighter and become a real threat, let me know. Till then, they're gonna get smacked around like the nerds they are."

Ranboo looked down and tried to hide the anxiety prickling under his skin. Techno seemingly read the room and sighed, putting his book aside and taking off his reading glasses before leaning forward and looking Ranboo in the eyes.

"Thanks for telling me and all I guess. I'll... I dunno, keep more of an eye out," he sighed.

"Thanks..." Ranboo murmured.

"Didn't know you cared," Techno chortled.

"I do," Ranboo murmured. "I... I wasn't sure I would - we... you don't... they don't really say good things about you - "

"What do they say?" Techno demanded, perking up. 

"What?"

"What do they say?"

"Uh... that you're evil and destructive and like... really bad."

"Do they all say that?" Techno pried.

"No... no not... yeah... yeah they all do, not gonna lie."

To his surprise, Techno laughed. "The propaganda _spreads_. Join anarchy, screw government. Yes. See, it's the hidden brilliance of my plan, because if the government is scared of me it means everyone who hates the government will leave me alone - brilliant!"

Ranboo snickered and shrugged. "Well... I guess if you're not concerned - "

"Nah~" Techno smirked. "Technoblade never dies."

Ranboo smiled and turned in attention back to the fire.

"I like it here..." he murmured.

"Yeah?" Techno hummed.

"Away from... everything..."

"Are you askin' to move in?"

Ranboo laughed. "No! no no no no, haha, I can't pay rent - "

"I mean, you can," Techno shrugged. "Though I do charge an incredibly hefty fee - "

"Yeah, that's why only Tommy can stay here," Ranboo teased.

"Look - Phil covers for him. That kid's broke," Techno dismissed.

They laughed for a moment and Ranboo continued smiling.

... Maybe Edward had a point.

~~~

Bad wasn't a superstitious fellow. He wasn't one to look at the crows flying overhead and wonder what sort of trouble they foretold. He was, however, someone who trusted his gut, so when he wandered in the mines and felt his gut twist uncertainly he stopped.

Perhaps it wasn't smart to mine alone today.

So, he enlisted Antfrost. He masked it under the guise of simply hanging out, but it was relieving to wander the mines with someone else - he would've asked Skeppy but the diamond-skinned elemental was off... likely messing with someone (he was always a troublemaker, the little muffin). 

Though, Antfrost was much more soothing to have for company. He was a cautious voice of reason and a great fighter. The cat hybrid listened intently to Bad's thoughts for the room they were carving out and even supplied some building tips (What a great friend to have!).

"So why were you carving it out down here?" Ant asked as they wandered through the stone tunnels. Bad looked down at the man who didn't even reach his shoulders and smiled. 

"Well, you see Fundy asked me to carve it out for him first. He said it was for... Dreamons or something like that - though I don't know what that means. But anyway, I got started and the little muffin said that he didn't need it anymore... so now I just have this big room and I have no idea what to do - well, I mean I have some ideas - "

"We can expand it a bit and make a really cool storage room," Antfrost offered.

"I... hmm, I don't know," Bad pondered, ducking low to avoid a piece of low lying rock that nearly scraped against his dark horns. "I also wanted to make a surprise for Skeppy but I - "

"Bad..." Ant interrupted. That was wrong, Ant barely interrupted (he was always so sweet and considerate - Bad was so happy to know so many wonderful people). They had just walked into the room Bad had been talking about, the ceiling was wonderfully tall allowing Bad to stand up to his full height without fear of hitting his head. Bad looked down to Antfrost and saw the anthropomorphic cat with slit-pupils and an uncertain gaze as his fur stood the slightest bit on end.

Bad followed Ant's gaze and picked out the strange presence off in the corner. Tendrils of vines spread out on the stone, like thin little red strings all tethered to the strange lump in the corner of the room.

"Is that yours?" Ant asked uncertainly.

"No..." Bad answered quizically. "What... what is that?"

Ant drew a sword and hovered his claws over the potions on his belt, his tail swishing uncertainly as he crept closer.

"Ant!" Bad hissed. "Hold on, we don't know what it is."

He nervously pulled out his sword and followed the cat as he stalked closer. It was a red sort of lump, covered in scarlet moss and crimson leaves... it was... pretty. Bad tilted his head as he took it all in...

"It's... an egg," Ant murmured.

"Yeah..." Bad took a step forward and felt something squish under his claws. He lifted his foot and found one of the little crimson vines squirming under his foot. Oh... he hadn't meant to hurt it...

"Don't touch it - " Ant warned (he was always so worried, it was sweet!).

But Bad was already kneeling down and trying to smooth out the indentation he'd left.

"Sorry little buddy! I didn't mean to!" Bad began frantically as he smoothed out the little vine. The crimson sap clung to his claws... it smelled wonderful...

It reminded him of the smell of that one birthday when Skeppy had made him a pie, all soft and warm inside. He'd been so happy (and Skeppy had been so proud) and it had tasted wonderful. They'd spent the rest of the day hanging out, messing around the Badlands, and cuddling after the sun went down. It had been a great sort of birthday. Bad laughed a little at the memory as he studied the sap clinging to his dark claws.

"Ant... Ant, it smells good... and it's kinda cute," Bad laughed as he sat down and stroked the vines all around. They curled under his touch like small little fish, like Mr. Squiggie and all of his cousins that swam about Bad's pond. The one Skeppy always threatened to eat, cackling as Bad chased him away from the pond like the little pest he could be with a smile on his face.

Ant wandered over and sat down. Bad offered him his claws with the crimson substance and Ant eyed it warily before giving it a half-hazard sniff. His pupils grew wide and dark as a smile lit up his face.

"It smells like cake," he smiled. "Like red-velvet!"

"Red-velvet?" Bad questioned. "No - it smells like pie, you muffin head."

"No..." Antfrost shook his head and smiled. "It's definitely red-velvet."

"Hmm... weird," Bad wondered. His eyes wandered back to the egg (it was so big, so helpless and defenseless. Why was it all alone? The poor thing). Bad gently stood up and walked closer to the egg, sheathing the sword (he was a muffin for pulling it out, this thing couldn't hurt them).

"I think... I like this thing, Bad," Ant murmured, standing up and coming up next to bad, both being careful to not step on any more vines.

"Me too!" Bad laughed. "I wonder where it came from?"

"I don't know... but I'm glad it's here," Ant smiled (aww, Ant's smile was always so bright). Bad grinned and wandered over to the egg that was just so cute and welcoming... it felt like home.

"I am too..." Bad smiled as he pressed his claws against the mossy exterior of the egg. It was soft under his touch and warm, something living and breathing with a slow heartbeat and a steady breath.

He didn't think about the instantaneous change, the switch that he and Ant had suffered as soon as they touched the crimson. There was no rhyme or reason for them to forsake their caution but the aroma smelled of the things they loved and the egg itself instilled the thought of home and love...

They didn't wonder why. It just was. Like the vines that spread under their feet and crept up on their skin like pretty little snakes eager for warmth and attention. Like the thrumming heartbeat of the egg that rang in their head or the soft murmuring both just faintly made out.

They didn't wonder why it felt like all their anger suddenly seeped out of them to feed the crimson...

They didn't know about the mask rooted in the center of its case, safe from harm and eager to corrupt the world around it. They didn't know about the godling's missing anger that was desperate to affect the world around it.

How could they?

How could they.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EGG~  
> So, if you didn't catch on, Dream's manifestation of anger IS the crimson (though he doesn't know it yet). There'll be more lore and explanations but just for some simple explanation - the egg feeds off other's anger (making them freakily happy - hmm, almost like a familiar godling who shoves his anger away~) and lures people in by making itself as appealing as possible (smelling like the person's favorite aroma, reminding them of home, giving them good vibes, all that jazz).  
> Look. Sorry not sorry about Tommy's panic attack, but trauma doesn't go away and it DEFINITELY doesn't just wait for a bad day to set in.  
> Love y'all.


	14. The Parting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ranboo gets called back to L'Manburg  
> Dadza's not just about to let him go alone  
> This was a mistake  
> *It was at this moment, Fundy realized, he fucked up*

The message came like an omen of misfortune. 

Ranboo had spent the morning bantering with Tommy over a breakfast of fresh bread, butter, and honeycomb straight from the hives. It had left him with sticky fingers and sticky lips - and had somehow gotten in Tommy's hair resulting in him and Philza spending thirty minutes by the fire with Tommy howling insults as Phil washed out his sticky hair using nothing but his fingers and a bucket of water, which was, according to Tommy, _very_ fucking cold... Techno laughed the whole time before he left the two to their devices. While Ranboo could've watched the two blondes throw insults at each other while Philza scrubbed at Tommy's messy locks, he decided to follow Techno.

He followed Techno to the turtles, leaving Tommy to the closest thing to a bath they had up here. Techno carved a trail through the snow, following yesterday's tracks out to the warm biodome where Ranboo could just barely glimpse green shells. There wasn't much snow to push through since it really hadn't snowed in a while, which was wonderful, though Techno had said that there was going to be a blizzard later that evening - something in the air pressure or something like that, it had been rather confusing. Ranboo didn't quite like the frequent snow storms this place recieved. Less snow meant there was less water to sting Ranboo's skin (not that much could touch him in these bundles of layers). Snow didn't sting as much as water, though maybe that was just because the temperature numbed his senses.

"Here we go," Techno murmured warmly as he opened the gate to the biodome, the warm air slamming into Ranboo like a wall made up of of heat and humidity. Techno threw off his cloak and began to weave around the large turtles that lay in the sand, some trying feebly to scoot towards him in search of kelp.

Ranboo loved the turtles. They were always cute and dorky, flopping about the sand in their mass quantities, looking up at him with soft dark eyes as they raised their necks and silently asked for food. There were just so many of them - Ranboo could just sit down and laugh as what seemed to be a hundred turtles scooted up and tried to bite at his fur-liner or the ties on his boots.

Techno had an affinity for the young ones. He always seemed to know and remember just where the oldest clutches of eggs were and was always there, crouching in the sand as he greeted the newcomers to the beach. He'd run two fingers over their small shells and would count them out, muttering to himself as he made a mental headcount. It was strangely unreal to see the Blood Lord so at home on a beach full of turtles.

Ranboo gingerly stepped side-ways to avoid a clump of sand on the beach where it was clear a new clutch had been laid when he received the mental call that assaulted his brain and rang in his ears.

" _Ranboo. Where are you? We need you back in L'Manburg, like now man. You lost?_ "

Ranboo froze and stood absolutely motionless for a few seconds as the words hung in his head. That was Quackity's voice - Quackity had sent him a message. That only ever happened if things were really bad and everyone was impatient. Mental messages were fickle things, sometimes ringing in everyone's head instead of their deliberate receiver. It was a last resort sort of thing... so... so he really needed to get back, there was no way to avoid it now.

He had to choose now. He had to pick now. Did he stay? Did he listen to Edward and stay here where it was nice and safe and pleasant with big smiles and bright laughs - where Tommy was alright and Techno was kind... where he wanted to be?

Or did he go back to L'Manburg? L'Manburg with its wonderful friends and warm houses with bright flags and glowing lanterns - where they needed him.

"Well that's... you gonna answer that?" Techno asked as he stood up from where he had been crouching by the baby turtles, looking to Ranboo.

So... so he had heard it too.

"Uh... uh... I don't know," Ranboo managed uncertainly as he began to fiddle with his claws. "I... I don't know if I should..."

Techno looked unimpressed as he looked away from Ranboo and down at the baby turtles he held in his palm.

"You don't want to go?" he asked.

"... no," Ranboo murmured.

"Then don't," Techno shrugged.

"I need to," Ranboo denied as he shook his head and let out a long sigh. Tubbo still needed him (he didn't even know Tommy was alive yet - he couldn't just leave Tubbo to Dream's grip). Quackity still needed him (he had to be the voice of reason sometimes - just someone to balance out Quackity's radicalism). Fundy and Niki probably were worried, they really made Ranboo feel the most guilty. He'd left without so much as a goodbye. If he were to stay here he'd... he'd hurt them.

Niki didn't deserve that. Fundy didn't deserve that. They were both kind and happy - he couldn't hurt or ruin them...

"Alright, come on then," Techno sighed as he gently placed the baby turtles back on the beach, giving them a parting stroke on their soft shells before he picked his way through the beach, pulling his thick blue coat off the fence post and wrapping it around his shoulders.

"Where are we going?" Ranboo asked uncertainly as he followed suit.

"Well, we gotta tell Phil, can't just let you leave yet - the guy's partial to you," Techno chuckled.

"Oh... yeah," Ranboo laughed. "But... but you know, I may not have to leave now."

"Uh - it sounded like an immediate-sort of thing," Techno deadpanned as he threw a look over his shoulder back at Ranboo.

He was right...

"Yeah... yeah you're right," Ranboo murmured, his eyes dragging along with his feet as he forced himself to follow, a terrible feeling in his gut as he realized this would be the last walk to the cottage he'd have in a while.

"Look - I - I'm not trying to force you into anything and all, I mean you know how I am with governments and my thoughts on them. If you were to - you know if you were to decide and stay or something like that - not that I want you to do that either, cause I can't get a moment of peace around here anymore - but you're welcome to. Phil likes you, and you're - you know, you're kind of okay."

Ranboo smiled, a taunt on his tongue. "It's just Phil who likes me?"

"Don't push it," Techno threatened, making Ranboo chuckle.

They returned to the house where Phil took the news rather well.

"You'll be okay an all? You sure you want to go back?" Phil's eyes were full of hidden worry but he made no move to argue.

"I... I'd like to stay - I really would. But - but I can't, I _can't_ leave Fundy or Niki... and I can't leave Tubbo," Ranboo nodded with some sort of certainty in his words. 

"Dream will be hanging around there," Phil warned. He was seated in one of the rocking chairs, his wings draped over the sides, one laying on the floor and the other stretched out to Philza's side where he was taking precious time to preen them, smoothing every feather back into its proper place.

"I... know," Ranboo's throat closed at the thought of Dream. He instinctively put a hand to his memory book hidden in his coat - he'd filled a page with warnings about Dream so he never ever forgot. He could never trust Dream - he had to remember that.

"He may hunt you down again, mate, if he's in the mood," Philza murmured darkly.

"I... I won't tell him where Tommy is - I promise," Ranboo murmured.

"Oh - mate I wasn't even - Oh, Ranboo," Phil chuckled as he stood up and reach up to clap Ranboo on the shoulders. "I was more... I'm more worried for you all alone out there. Dream probably still wants to hurt you."

"But he's hurting Tubbo right now," Ranboo managed from his shaky voice. "I can't... I can't sit by - I need to tell Tubbo Tommy's alive and - "

"What do you mean Dream's hurting Tubbo? What the hell is he doing!?" Tommy basically leaped from upstairs, forsaking the ladder completely. His entrance scared Ranboo so badly the half-breed nearly shrieked.

" _Such a jumpy small one_ ," Edward supposed from his place by the fire. Ranboo chose to ignore him.

"What's that fucker doing to Tubbo?" Tommy demanded, emotion lacing every part of his words.

"Didn't Tubbo exile you?" Techno asked incredulously.

"Shut up," Tommy snapped angrily.

"Alright, alright calm down," Phil soothed, looking between Tommy and Phil with his stern eyes. "We'll figure this out."

"But what's happening to Tubbo!?" Tommy demanded as he looked desperately to Ranboo for more information. He looked like he was about to lunge across the room and pry the words from Ranboo's throat. Ranboo couldn't help but scuttle a bit behind Phil's wings.

"He just - just what he does to everyone - what he did to you. Tubbo still thinks your dead and... and Dream's good at manipulating and all so I just... I can't remember why I think that... I - " Ranboo pulled out his memory book and desperately began to flip through the pages, almost cowering behind Phil's wings.

Why did he think Dream was hurting Tubbo? There had to be a reason - there had to be - 

"I'm sure you're right," Phil's gentle hand landed on his book and pulled it down so he could look into Ranboo's eyes. Ranboo immediately looked away as those bright blue all-seeing eyes touched his mind for a moment.

"But... So what do we do?" Tommy pleaded from the side.

"Tommy - " Techno began, his voice ringing clearly out from across the room and conflicting with Tommy's wavering argument.

"No, _no_! No we can't just let him continue thinking I'm dead, we _can't_! We can't let Dream hurt him - " Tommy shook in emotion - he looked ready to crumble.

"Maybe we can get the message to him," Phil assured Tommy gently. "I just don't think it should be Ranboo who delivers it."

"What? Why?" Tommy demanded.

Ranboo wasn't sure what to say to that.

Phil adjusted the hat on his head and sighed. "Cause it might make him a traitor in their eyes."

"What!?" Tommy cried.

"He's been living with _me_ , Tommy, that isn't exactly loyalty to the government!" Techno scoffed, crossing his arms and narrowing his eyes.

"Yeah - yeah but Tubbo will understand - " Tommy laughed nervously.

"Tommy, they _exiled_ you, what makes you think they'll forgive Ranboo!?" Techno demanded.

"Shut UP!" Tommy snapped back in fury, his voice cracking into a broken sort of argument. "You don't - you don't know shit so... so back off!"

"What? You think they'll forgive Ranboo because he's gonna tell Tubbo an exiled criminal is alive after the kid just spent weeks conspiring with the most wanted criminal of the country; me?" Techno laughed cruelly. "Tommy! They exiled you for a bit of light arson! What do you think they'll do to Ranboo for blatant betrayal!?"

"SHUT UP!" Tommy screamed.

"Alright, alright - that's _enough_ ," Phil threw a glare at both parties and let out a long shaky sigh. Ranboo was thankful for the feathery appendages Phil offered him to hide behind. The glares being thrown across the room made his gut curl as he felt the serenity of the house shattered by sides and disagreements. He hated sides - he hated this fighting. It needed to stop, it had to stop. He had to stop it!

"I...I don't have to tell them _where_ Tommy is," Ranboo offered quietly, eagerly ducking back down to hide below the tension building to unfathomable levels, choking everyone in the room with anger and awkwardness. Tommy was glaring at Techno through tear-filled grey eyes while Techno returned the gaze with a cold sort of look.

"You will, they'll make you," Philza denied gently as he looked back to Ranboo. "They won't just take your word for it. They'll want to know where he is, and have proof which will make you lead them right to Techno and sell yourself out. Better to stay quiet and stay out of trouble."

"But - but _Phil_ , what about Tubbo!?" Tommy practically whimpered.

Phil let out a long breath as he looked at Tommy. He closed his eyes and let his wings adjust their positions on his back. The silence between them was long and arduous, Ranbo strained to make out the deliberation of thoughts rampaging through Phil's eyes as his mouth curled into a frown.

"I'll go with Ranboo," he sighed finally.

"What!?" Techno and Tommy both cried.

"Phil - what are you - did you listen to a word I just _said_!?" Techno demanded. "They'll _kill_ you if they know you're with me!"

"But I'm not on the Cabinet - I'm not really even a citizen, they just gave me a house," Phil chuckled as he dismissed Techno's words with a simple wave of his hands. "Besides, if it gets dicey, I have an escape plan now."

He splayed his wings a bit to get the point across before looking to Tommy. He took a gentle step forward and looked up to the boy.

"I'll get there, tell Tubbo you're alive, and then I'm coming _right back_ , okay?" he put his hands on Tommy's shoulders and gazed earnestly into Tommy's eyes. Tommy nodded and muttered something - Ranboo thought it sounded a bit like a thank you, but it could've easily been a 'fuck you'. Knowing Tommy... it was probably the latter.

Phil looked back at Ranboo with a smile on his face. "This way - we can get a feel for the situation and if it's too dicey, I can get you back home. Sound good?"

"Yeah... yeah!" Ranboo felt his chest warm a bit at those words. Home... was this home now? It didn't have his pets or Niki or Fundy... but it was nice. It was welcoming and warm.

"If we see Dream and he comes at you ax drawn, we're coming right back," Philza laughed.

"That would be... yeah that would be preferred," Ranboo admitted sheepishly.

"Great!" Philza grabbed the sheathed sword that was kept propped up by the door and strapped it to his belt. "Then let's get going - maybe if we're lucky, I'll be home before tomorrow morning."

Techno took an uncertain step forward like he wasn't sure whether to argue or not. Philza saw his movement and sent the piglin hybrid a gentle smile.

"I'll be right home," Philza promised.

"You - you curse us when you say things like that, you know that right?" Techno sighed.

Phil only laughed as he pulled the door open and threw on his second coat.

"Always so positive Techno. Don't kill each other, alright? And keep an eye out for Ghostbur - haven't seen him since last night, getting a little worried," Phil threw the words over his shoulder as he gestured for Ranboo to follow.

"His sheep is still downstairs so I doubt he went far," Techno deadpanned. "He loves that thing."

"Jealous of a sheep Technoblade?!" Tommy jeered.

"That - that was not even remotely close to what I had in mind," Techno stammered.

"Don't kill each other!" Phil called behind him in a chuckle as the two of them exited.

Ranboo laughed along with Phil as they walked down the front stairs and headed for the nether portal that lay only beyond the icy foothills. As they climbed the hills Phil stopped, turned around, and waved. Ranboo followed his gaze down the snowy slopes to the quaint little cottage with smoke billowing out of its chimney, and a familiar head of blonde standing at the stable-side, watching them go. Ranboo knew it had to be Tommy.

"You sure you're okay coming with me?" Ranboo murmured uncertainly. "Is it okay to leave Tommy?"

"Techno can protect him for a bit... besides - it would be worse if I didn't go. Like it or not Tubbo's still important to Tommy, and I'm not going to cut him off from people..."

_Like Dream did_ , Ranboo thought dryly.

"So, no, I don't mind," Philza laughed.

"Thank you..." Ranboo murmured.

Phil gently reached over and took Ranboos hand, placing a small emerald earring in his palm as they walked.

"What's... what's this?" Ranboo asked uncertainly as he brought the earring closer to his face so he could study the small little jewel encased in gold.

"I was waiting for the right moment to give it to you," Phil laughed as they crested the hill and spied the flickering nether portal laying beside the icy shore. "It's just a little memento - Techno calls them Friendship emeralds. I have one, Tech has one, Tommy has one, I gave Ghostbur one but I don't know where it went... it's just... you're a good kid, Ranboo. You're welcome here anytime."

Ranboo clutched the emerald earring close to his chest and smiled.

"Thank you, Phil," he murmured, his voice shaking in happiness. "I'm... I'll miss being here... I really did like it..."

"Aww, mate. Don't get all mushy on me, I'll start crying," Phil laughed as he clapped Ranboo on the back. "Let's get you home to L'Manburg."

~~~

Dream was, undeniably, bored. 

He sat atop the Community House, sitting guard for the nether portal, fletching arrows. It was a nice task, something familiar and time-consuming, but at the moment it only felt tedious. There was that unquenchable energy building in his chest, that primal excitement that he'd never been able to lock away. It burned in him, thrumming through his body like unceasing adrenaline and all Dream wanted to do was hunt. Hunt and chase and catch.

Quackity had sent the message - Ranboo would come. It could take a day, or perhaps days. The Half-Breed would come to his superior's beckoned call but would never be able to arrive at the heels of his masters... Dream would make certain.

Sweet little Tubbo was waiting for Ranboo so he could solidify the plan. Quackity just wanted another opinion - he was so _desperate _to find reasons to distrust Dream, it was admirable honestly, how stubborn the shifter could be. And Ranboo... well the Halfbreed would never arrive at L'Manburg. He'd stay right where Dream wanted him, struggling like fish in a gill-net. He'd stay missing - at least until Phil came to rescue him...__

__And Phil would come to rescue him. That was the thing with people like Technoblade or Phil, they were nearly uncontrollable unless you threaten those they care for, then they were helpless little dogs on tight leashes..._ _

__Ranboo was Phil's leash, Dream was almost certain. He'd seen the look in the divine being's eyes when Dream had tried to teach Ranboo his fist lesson - such a protective gaze. Dream knew that look, he'd dawned it many times through his life, and always to protect those who could be used against him._ _

__He finished the tip of one arrow and slipped it into his quiver before picking up another long stick of birch wood and setting about to fletching._ _

__Ranboo would bring him Phil. Phil would bring him Technblade. Technoblade would leave Tommy defenseless - and therefore would give Dream Tommy._ _

__Tommy, who would writhe and scream after all this time in Dream's grip, all of Dream's hard work wasted and glossed over by Phil's foolish words and healing hands. Phil had likely slapped on those false bandages and tried to convince Tommy that he was fine. Phil likely was still pretending Tommy was alright, ignoring the broken pieces and desperately hoping that somehow he'd fixed what was shattered, never accepting that Tommy would never be the way he was - that offered Dream some comfort. But the thought of how much Tommy had fallen back and how much work would have to be done was almost frustrating a, but Dream was able to stomp down that anger before it festered in his stomach. Phil was just foolishly sentimental - he couldn't see the possibilities that lay before Tommy if only the boy would release his stubbornness and independent rebelliousness. Phil couldn't do for Tommy what needed to be done... Dream could. Dream would._ _

__It would take swifter action to break Tommy down again, Dream would have to be crueler - a good thing he no longer held apathy - but it would be so unpleasant to get there once more. It wasn't the breaking down that was exciting - it was the building up - the reconstruction. It was watching those who thought themselves unshakable twist and bend into something useful and meaningful. It was molding a lump of useless clay into something beautiful and strong, something unbreakable and wonderful._ _

__Tommy could be wonderful - would be wonderful. He'd be happy again, happy besides Dream. Happy and powerful and safe, he'd be the perfect little one. Then maybe Tommy could convince Tubbo to join their ranks - it wouldn't be hard, Dream could teach Tommy how to twist his otherwise blunt words (though that would take much time). Tommy would be untouchable, no one would dare harm him..._ _

__Dream shook his head as he tried to get rid of the daydreams. Wastes of time. Foolish dreams and useless visions. He needed to focus on what he had before... him..._ _

__Dream looked up as the nether portal fluctuated, immediately forsaking his arrow and pressing his chest to the roof of the Community House as he carefully watched two familiar figures step through._ _

__He felt his usual steady heart flutter in primal eagerness._ _

__Phil..._ _

__Phil! If Dream still had mirth he would've laughed and screamed in jubilation. Phil was here - there was no need for extra steps - the man was already here, on his own accord!!_ _

__Dream alighted from the roof and raced to the house of Quackity - the man with the best initiative around here._ _

__And of course, Quackity perked up at the words, like a hound set on the blood trail. He went around baying his call and summoning his fellow hunters as bloodlust filled his gaze and set the city alight with the fires of revenge. Dream almost felt like skipping down the metaphorically burning streets of L'Manburg as everything fell into place better than he ever could've hoped for._ _

__Tubbo would be desperate to prove himself to Dream today, he would be desperate to get rid of the pain in his heart from Tommy's loss. He'd try his hardest to do this well - it would be lovely to watch - and he would grow so much. Perhaps he'd finally learn to stand firm with Dream behind him, unswayed by others unless it Dream's own advice - that would be wonderful. He'd already made such leaps and bounds since Tommy's "death". He'd taken initiative, planned the hunt, prepared for difficulties, set up the execution, and even practiced his speeches for Dream, the eagerness to please burning in the boy's gentle eyes. Dream would've been proud if his chest wasn't empty._ _

__Tubbo would fulfill his role wonderfully, and Phil would walk right into his cage._ _

__Oh, he wished he could still get giddy with excitement._ _

__Phil would be detained. Ranboo would be too cowardly to speak up. Tubbo would prove himself. Techno would pay for his lies..._ _

__And Tommy? Tommy would come home. Tommy would be home, where he belonged._ _

__Oh, Dream couldn't _wait_ any longer._ _

____

~~~

Phil kept his eyes on every rooftop and on every corner as he kept Ranboo at arm's length. He could've sworn he saw a flash of a green cloak disappearing from the community house as his vision swam with the violet hues of the portal - but that may have also been his paranoia. His wounds were mostly healed from the last time he'd seen the masked bastard - but the memory of their pain was still there, thrumming at his fingertips as he escorted Ranboo back to the familiar houses sitting perched above a pit on the side of a mountain.

Ranboo climbed the stairs to his front door and looked back at Phil uncertainly. Phil's heart ached to see the boy so unsure, stuck between two worlds, loving both and belonging in neither. 

"You'll be okay here?" Phil asked uncertainly as he scanned the surroundings for any sign of Dream.

"Yeah," Ranboo nodded. "You?"

"I'll grab a few things from my house and then go find Tubbo," Phil shrugged as he looked to his house. It was a decent thing - four walls and roof, so not bad all things considered. It just wasn't... pleasant. It had never been home, rather a base of sorts - something to keep him tethered to this country that Wilbur had died for. He'd hoped the house would keep him warm, let him find the strange twisted love for this country that his son had held long ago - but all possible fondness seemed to have died with Wil. 

He left Ranboo to his own devices as he strode over to his house and pushed open the door, the hinges squeaking upon their unwanted movement. A dusty, drab sort of emptiness greeted Phil and the survivor regarded everything around him with a level of disinterest. It was quiet and empty - lonely and dark. He wanted nothing more to do with this place. With any luck, it would rot away after he left it. It would rot and fall into the deep crater below, clattering off the stone and crashing into thousands of pieces.

He wanted nothing to do with L'Manburg... not anymore.

Why Ranboo found this place welcoming was a mystery to him. 

This country had been cold from the moment Phil had entered it. Cold and callused, corrupting and consuming like a vacuum of power and necessity, far from the warm dreamland Wilbur had written about. It was stained with blood - Wilbur's blood. His boy's last actions had been to destroy this place. Yet everyone seemed to forget that. No one remembered that their first president had yearned to tear down what he created - maybe that was why it always felt rotten to Phil, like a zombie. Something supposed to be long-dead forcing itself onward through foolish determination as a mere memory of what it had been, a fragment of what it once was. This whole place was just something that was twisted and wrong.

Phil closed the door behind him and drifted over to the chests sitting by the empty fireplace. He pulled out a collection of potions, checking their colors and thickness before strapping them to his belt. He went around the house pocketing more items; a few baubles here, a blaserod there, anything remotely useless was left in the dusty chests, left to time and space and whatever was to come after Phil.

He never wanted to return here again. 

He wanted warm nights with snow sticking to the windowsills. He wanted Techno reading in a chair by the fire, his glasses gleaming in the flickering light. He wanted Tommy on his shoulder, his eyes bright and blue with spirit returned to them as he jeered about something pointless. He wanted Ranboo next to Edward, speaking their little warbles like some strange sort of birds. He wanted a home - not this... not this house of lonely nights, sickening memories, and ghostly emotions.

Phil's eyes finally rested on the chest laying right beside the fire...

Speaking of ghosts -

Gently, almost ceremoniously, Phil lifted the lid of the chest and pulled out the wrapped diamond sword. It was heavy in his hands and for a moment, Phil considered leaving it with the rest of the bad memories. There was ash in his throat and tears in his eyes until Phil stowed it in his spacial pocket and let out a long sigh as he knelt there, staring into the empty chest.

He couldn't just pretend it never happened - no matter how much he longed to. No matter how much he longed to heal with Tommy, patching wounds and laughing around hurt gazes, he couldn't leave it all behind...

No matter how much he wanted to.

He stayed kneeling there for a moment, his eyes staring off into space as his mind danced with different thoughts and options - mostly of Wilbur and Tommy... and now of Tubbo, and the conversation Phil would have to have with the President of this Godsforsaken country.

His thoughts were interrupted by a collection of people impatiently ringing his doorbell.

He couldn't help but scoff. He hadn't even been here an hour and the people were already trying to test him. Taking as much time as humanly possible, Philza stood up and strode over to the door, ignoring the insistent ringing that he was probably going to kill someone for.

He pulled the door open with a witty remark on his tongue that rotted and died the moment he lay eyes on his visitors.

"Hello, Philza," Tubbo greeted - coldly. When had the kid's voice gotten so hard and sharp? Philza felt his muscles tense as he saw the cold anger in Tubbo's gaze.

Tubbo, Quackity, Fundy... Ranboo.

They stood before him in bloodied aprons with axes in hand, a glare in all of their eyes (except for Ranboo who looked like he was moments away from blind panic, Phil recognized that look).

"What's going on?" Phil asked slowly, taking a step back as he considered closing his door as fast as possible. He was thankful he'd tucked his wings under his cloak before coming here - it seemed like explaining why he was breaking the world's rules wouldn't be the most pleasant of conversations to have at the moment.

"Philza, Philza, Philza," Quackity tutted - like he was some child to be scolded. The tone made Philza's blood run warm and furiously - he didn't like to think himself proud but that didn't mean he was about to be scolded by an arrogant child. "You're in a bit of trouble here."

"Oh?" Philza could feel his wings ruffling instinctively as his eyes ran up the gleaming diamond blades of the axes.

"Philza Minecraft, you've been conspiring with Technoblade." It wasn't even an accusation from Tubbo, it was a statement.

Shit. Well, this was not the conversation Phil wanted to have with the President this morning.

"What are you - " Philza laughed nervously.

"Don't lie - " Tubbo snapped, emotion lacing his words. "We have reliable intel placing you at Techno's cabin."

Reliable intel? What the fuck was going on!? Ranboo... Ranboo hadn't - had he?

Phil's eyes glanced at the panicked gaze of Ranboo. He thought he saw panic in those eyes, along with confusion. The kid looked too overwhelmed to be behind this so unless he had fumbled and told someone in the last five minutes - this wasn't his doing.

"What's going on?" Phil demanded sharply.

"We're hunting down Technoblade," Quackity snapped, looking at Philza like he was some sort of monster to strike down.

It wasn't _shocking_ per see, it was easily insinuated in all honesty just taking in their garb (had they really slaughtered pigs just to color their aprons like some cultish ritual?) and their glares. Still, the thought of these people disturbing his home, his boys, made him swallow a curse and reach for his sword. They would not so much as _touch_ Techno with his gentle look and uncertain words nor would they frighten Tommy with his bright smile and wavering voice. They would not bring blood to that warm home.

"Good luck with that," he managed with false bravado. "Who knows where he is."

"You do," Tubbo accused.

Phil felt his surroundings fall away as he took a deep breath and focused on his foes. He wouldn't have to fight Ranboo - but that still left Quackity, Tubbo, and... Fundy. He locked eyes with his grandson and watched the man meet his gaze - there was perhaps a bit of remorse. 

Phil wasn't going to pretend their relationship was anything other than strained. The first time he met the man was at his father's funeral, not the most glorious of family reunions. The fox hybrid was clever, he'd heard, bright and happy, somewhat devious at times but good-natured at others. The fact was Philza hadn't really gotten the chance to learn as the man avoided everyone nowadays it seemed - 

He was reminiscent of Tommy in that way. A family member who was the furthest from the family you could get - a literal stranger. A stranger who Phil wasn't sure about - a stranger who couldn't decide if he loved or hated his family...

Well, Phil was about to make that decision for him now. 

"Fundy," he breathed. A silent plea for help. He could take on the three of them, but if Fundy stepped aside then -

The man finally looked away, his gaze instead turning to Tubbo - awaiting orders.

Phil felt rage.

Fury screeched in Philza's mind as he took in the fight he was about to have. It would be no easy feat getting past Quackity and Tubbo - let alone Fundy, but Phil could do it. If he took Tubbo out at the knee it would distract Quacky long enough for Philza to catch him in the ribs - and Fundy could get whatever blow Philza felt suited him in the moment. He prepared to break through the lines when Ranboo looked up - his gaze on something above Phil's door and full of fear.

Why?

"Now, Philza, you can either comply - or we do this the hard way," Quackity threatened.

"Comply?" Philza scoffed as his hand clenched his sword hilt.

"Yes," Tubbo nodded sternly. "Fundy, the boots, please."

The little traitorous rat came over and handed the President a pair of iron boots with runes carved into their side leaving a shimmering sheen over their surface. Tubbo held them up and offered them to Philza as Quackity help his ax at the ready.

"What are those?" Philza asked, faking pleasantry as he glanced at the window - could he break out of it and fly away? Surely it was worth a shot, it would be less of a risk than charging the three of them - though Quackity looked ready to let lose the ax. Maybe he could feint a charging attack, get Quackity to swing first, and lodge his ax in the floorboard, buying Phil enough time to escape through the window.

"Philza, for your crimes against L'Manburg, I'm sentencing you to house arrest until further notice," Tubbo stated. Philza thought his voice wavered for a moment but he really didn't care if the kid was having second thoughts. He skimmed over the runes of the boots and thought he made out the familiar runes of binding and restrict - making those a nasty choice of footwear for him.

"House arrest?" Philza laughed as he shot them all a glare. "You're not going to get me to tell you anything. Keep me here all you like, but you won't find Techno."

"There's no need," Quackity sneered. "We know where you and the pig live."

Philza's eyes again flickered to Ranboo. Surely not... surely not... the kid wouldn't...

Ranboo was still staring at the roof in terror. Could he just not meet Phil's eyes in shame? No - no he was looking at something - someone.

Cold realization washed over Philza as he began to connect dots. He only knew of one other person who knew where Techno lived...

"Dream..." he breathed. "Dream's helping you."

Like a god summoned by name the masked bastard descended from Phil's roof, landing right next to Ranboo which was nearly enough to make Phil snarl. Ranboo looked like he wanted to combust right then and there, his eyes never leaving that white mask, like it was some sort of snake about to bite him.

"I am," Dream nodded as he faced Phil, that dinner-plate-sized smile tilting ever so slightly. "Not to spite Techno or anything. Nothing against you or Techno, Phil - it's just business."

He couldn't... he couldn't know about Tommy, could he? Did he? Was this part of Dream's plan to get Tommy - or was Tommy still safe? Would Tubbo call this hunt off if he knew Techno was protecting Tommy - would that just tell Dream where he was?

What could he do? What could he do!?

Phil desperately glanced around the room for some sort of escape but found himself being boxed in by walls, wood, and diamond axes.

He couldn't tell Tubbo about Tommy now - not when Dream was right there. If Dream didn't know Tommy was with Techno - then maybe Tommy could hide and Techno could fight the fuckers off. He couldn't betray Tommy...

He couldn't let these fuckers get Techno either.

Phil wanted to pull his hair out in handfuls as his head ached and his throat closed. There was nothing he could do - damned if you do, damned if you don't. If he did nothing, they'd hunt down Techno and kill him. If he told Tubbo that Tommy was alive, there was a chance the hunt would be off (unless the kid was as corrupted as Phil figured) but then that would just tell Dream where Tommy was! There was nothing he could do!!

He couldn't fight through them all - he'd only barely gotten away from Dream the last time they'd fought.

Hopelessness clamped his chest like a vice and Phil's mind screamed for him to rebel, to do anything other than be complaisant. But the rest of Phil felt numb. Numb from the powerlessness of the situation, from Fundy's betrayal, from Dream's involvement.

Gods, the universe was out to ruin him wasn't it?

He tuned out whatever pretentious bullshit Tubbo spewed next along with the sadistic laugh of Quackity. He tuned out all instructions as Tubbo handed him the boots. He hardly registered anything as he gripped the cold iron and leather prison shoes in his hands. He looked up once to see Ranboo standing there, shaking uncontrollably until Dream put a stilling hand on the boy's shoulder.

Philza snarled a snarl as he watched Ranboo swallow a scream. If Dream touched Tommy or Techno he'd -

He'd what?

What could he do right now?

Philza clenched the boots in his hands.

"Put em' on old man, we don't have all day," Quackity demanded.

Philza forced himself to be still, he _wouldn't_ tremble before these fucks. He crouched down and pulled his dark armored boots off before replacing them with their cursed iron counterparts. The leather and iron clung to his skin like something hungry and living - the Curse of Binding. It dug into his flesh and hugged him too tightly like a glove a few sizes too small, but the glove was stitched to your skin with tight wire and cruel flesh.

Phil swallowed a string of curses as the group laughed at his predicament, mocking and taunting as they left him in his living room, disgraced and despairing.

Only Fundy stayed by the doorway as the others went down the stairs, Phil hardly noticed he was there until the man dared to speak.

"I'm sorry it had to go like this... but I still love you, grandpa," Fundy offered, his soft face looked at him uncertainly, his red ears perking up and his tail unusually still behind him. It was like he was waiting for something - like he was waiting for someone to assure him that it was alright.

But it wasn't alright - it wasn't even close to being fine.

Philze met Fundy's eyes and felt something low and sinister bloom in his chest as he took in those words. He was _sorry_? "Sorry" couldn't even begin to atone for this fuckery. The fox was on his way to hurt Techno - _his_ Techno. Tech, who talked to his horse like it was a person, who read stories to Tommy at night by the crackling fire always ignoring the blond's interruptions, who smiled and laughed, who nervously leaned into Phil's touches, who thought the world hated him and so tried to hate the world back even though his heart was too fucking big and his mind was too fucking full.

Phil let out a cold laugh as he glared at the fucker who thought he could hurt his Techno and then _apologize_ like it was some simple little mistake.

"You're fucking dead to me."

Phil meant for those words to sting and couldn't help but feel a bit of satisfaction to see the man recoil like he'd been stabbed. Fundy's eyes filled with tears as the hybrid quickly turned and fled after his comrades. Phil watched him run, cold fury in his gaze as the rat scuttled back to the rest of the infestation who made their way to corrupt his home and hurt those he loved.

Ranboo was in the group too, Dream still beside him like some sort of bodyguard - it made Phil sick. The half-breed glanced back at Phil and his whisper filled Phil's head.

" _I'll protect him._ "

Philza nodded as the whisper filled his ear and hopefully no one else's. Ranboo's words were well-placed but they did nothing to quell Phil's rage and helplessness.

Ranboo couldn't do anything to stop them.

Philza tried to breach his doorframe and found a heavy enchantment keeping his feet glued to the house floor. He cursed as he backed away, slamming the door shut as hard as possible, knocking a picture off the wall, and splintering the doorframe.

He needed to do something - he needed to stop this! He raged as he shoved a collection of brewing stands off the shelves, leaving the glass to shatter to the ground like the peace Philza had been hoping to preserve.

He had to do something...

He had to do something!

He whirled around and stalked towards his stone furnace, sitting down in front of it and raising his right foot. With as much force as possible, he slammed his feel into the furnace, feeling a bit of the cursed metal bend under the impact.

It would take hours to wear the durability of boots down and break them - but Philza was ready to try. They shouldn't know the nether way - unless Dream somehow did (fuck. maybe he did) but either way that gave Phil at least three to four hours of travel at minimum. He slammed his foot into the furnace again and watched a bit of rock go flying as he chipped his furnace. That was fine - if he broke the furnace he'd move on to the stone wall. His fury drove every kick, bending metal under his feet as he grit his teeth and used all of his mental energy to send a message - he needed to warn Tech!

"They're coming, old friend. Hide Tommy. L'Manburg hunts for you," Philza hissed as he slammed his heel into the furnace again. He had to hope only Techno got it... he had to hope...

Wilbur. Techno. Tommy.

Wilbur. Techno. Tommy.

He repeated those names to himself with every impact that sent more metal bending. He would not stand by - he would not be still.

He would not let them die! No one else!

_"Kill me, Phil! Please!"_

No one else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh, sorry Fundy, love you darling!! You'll get a chapter soon, I promise!  
> Don't worry, the crimson will come back, they were sidelined for a while in canon and so will be here since it's not critical right now.  
> There's SOMETHING wrong with this chapter, but I can't put a finger on it so if any of you have criticism, I would love it. I have no beta so... ya know, we're vibin.  
> Thank you all who gave me such beautiful comments, love you guys! (;


	15. Unknowing Betrayal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Techno has a great day.  
> *Kalm*  
> Techno gets Phil's message.  
> *panik*

Techno was tuning out the voices. They'd gone feral since Philza and Ranboo had disappeared beyond the horizon, their footprints carving a trail to the nether portal like a constant reminder that they were gone. The cacophony clawed at Techno's mind, ripping it to shreds as they screamed and howled in protest.

_PHIL nuuu RANBOO DREAM STOP STOP STOP THEM BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD Dadza not safe BUTCHERS TechnoDUMB Tommy!!! Dumb! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD Ranboo oh no DREAM this is fine DREAM KNOWS TOMMY HIDE TOMMY Philza NO STOP THEM TECHNOOO BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD_

It made dealing with Tommy difficult. The kid seemed to decide that today of all days was the opportune time to cause as many problems as possible. Techno had taken refuge inside to deal with the voices and mediated for a while before he finally stepped outside, perhaps an hour after Phil had left, in order to call Tommy inside before the brat caught a cold (since he refused to wear his coat when no one was around to force him to).

It was a day made for change - the wind had changed direction at some point last night, blowing from the north instead of the east. It promised a storm and judging by Carl's uncertain pacing in his stall it would be a nasty one. Techno stepped out with Tommy's coat hung on his arm and lumbered down the steps, half-focused on Carl's distant whinnying, when he spied the kid's project.

A cobblestone tower.

The kid was lugging stones across the tundra and stacking them together with some meager substitute of mortar (probably the coarse gravely clay that littered the area). He'd made incredible progress in the minuscule amount of time Techno had dared to leave him alone but that only made Techno's annoyance fester a bit more.

"Tommy!" he called up the base of the nearly ten-foot-tall tower, his ears twitching anxiously as his voice echoed through the air ...

Where was the wind? Was the storm moving in that fast?

"Hey~ Technoblade, my friend!" Tommy answered back, his impish little face peeking down from above where he was laying more stonework.

"Tommy, what is this!?" Techno demanded as he gestured at the hideous column that now stood in his front yard like an ugly beacon that practically advertised Tommy's location.

"I'm making my cobblestone Tower of Power!" Tommy laughed as he disappeared back to the roof leaving Techno fumbling for arguments.

_RacconInnit awww STOOPID!! DREAM This idiot PHIL NO! RANBOO HELP TECHNO - Blood for the Blood God e e e e e BLOOD Tommy you dumb fu- DREAM WILL FIND DREAM KNOWWWSS TECHNOOO whyyyy TUBBO IS NOT GONE! BUTCHERSSSS Tommy I swear - BLOOD BLOOD huminahuminahumina WATCH OUT! TECHNO!_

"Tommy," Techno growled as he strode around the base of the cobblestone, searching for a door. The voices screamed and mocked leaving Techno holding his head and gently tugging on his hair with a hand as he went around the entire perimeter of Tommy's abomination only to find it had no door. "Tommy!"

"What?" Tommy defended as his head peeked back over.

"Tommy... what is this?" Techno's voice was low and dangerous as he glared at Tommy who faltered under that tone.

_Ohh nuu! TechnoBAD HELP HIM Technosoft plz SLEEPY BOIZ BLOOD PHIL NO - let him have his tower RANBOOO PLEASEEE DREAM STOP Aww, Tommy_

"It's my - "Tommy went to repeat again.

"We need to take it down," Techno growled.

"No - come on, please Techno," Tommy begged as he vaulted himself over the side of the tower and landed in front of Techno. He was about Techno's height... okay, maybe slightly shorter, but Techno's hooves did give him a slight advantage in this situation. Actually, as Techno took in the boy's visage, he found some strange sense of relief. Tommy was broader, it seemed. He'd filled out a bit and had much more color to his cheeks nowadays. He was livelier, fearing nothing (and apparently being as stupid as humanly possible) and having the energy of a young rabbit. No... not a rabbit - rabbits were skittish and wild when they were young, Tommy was still hesitant in some things, but he was mostly just confrontational, he was some other small furry creature with an affinity for getting into as much trouble as humanely possible.

"Tommy - you're trying to _hide_ , remember? This is - this is the opposite," Techno sighed as he held the bridge of his nose and massaged it to try and quell the voices.

"But - come on, Techno!" Tommy cried in protest. "I'll just make a little one!"

"In the middle of my lawn!" Techno cried.

"It makes it look better!" Tommy argued.

"How!?" Techno cried, gesturing to the building as a whole. "There are so many other blocks you could use! At least _try_ to be creative if you're going to ruin my lawn!"

"That _is_ creative! No one else builds cobblestone shit!"

"Because it's garbage!"

"It is not! Fuck you!!"

Tommy went climbing back up the side of the tower and miraculously made his way back to where he had been, ignoring Techno's next remark as his fingers found little divets in the stone to pull him back up the wall. Techno watched him go, noting how strong he'd gotten since he arrived. He was scaling cobblestone walls like a squirrel and could swing a sword with a ferocity that was reminiscent of Philza in his younger days.

"You're going to tell everyone where you are!" Techno called up. "This is the opposite of stealthy!"

"Fuck you!" Tommy yelled back down.

Techno sighed and grumbled to himself as he realized this was a losing battle.

"At least wear your coat!" he scolded as he balled up Tommy's coat and threw it up and over the wall where he had to hope Tommy would find it. "It's going to storm soon!"

There was no reply from Tommy leaving Techno standing in the silence. Well, the closest he'd come to silence in a while. There was the feeling that Techno was missing something as the tundra fell into a strange sort of lull...

He chalked it up to Philza being gone. The guy was just a familiar presence that Techno had grown accustomed to... maybe Ranboo was the same. They and Tommy were the warm ghost of a touch hovering inches from his skin, and once they were gone he was left with his nerves tingling and his senses on edge.

_PHILZA! DADZA NOOOOO TechnoHELP TechnoDUMB DREAM aww Technosoft Tommy!! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! RacoonInnit precious RANBOO Quackity NO haha house arrest F in the chatter folks NOO F F F DREAM NO - awwww TECHNO!! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD_

Techno gave up on trying to reason with Tommy as today just seemed to be trying to give him a headache in every way - between Philza leaving, the voices going crazy, and now Tommy losing his mind it was a miracle he was still in one piece and sane. He walked over to the stable where Carl greeted him eagerly with a nicker and a playful bump of his head.

"Yeah, I'll take you running when Phil gets back," Techno murmured as he stroked the horse's snout gently. "Get you to stretch your legs."

The horse pawed at the earth impatiently as if to demand a run this instant, but gave up his stubbornness when Techno pulled a golden carrot out of his cloak. Carl took his snack and paced around his stall once or twice, shaking his thick mane and rattling his chain mail as he looked nervously to the north.

Techno took a long breath and closed his eyes as he felt the strange stillness that Carl was likely unnerved by - the calm before a storm. It would be a big one, some sort of terrible gale. He'd have to make sure the house was fit for it (maybe it was a good thing Phil would be in L'Manburg tonight).

He spent the rest of the day making preparations, barring windows, ensuring that the chimney flue was still intact and was venting the smoke well, along with finishing up the siding of the house that had been falling apart from the last few windy storms. The flurries began near noon, small little white specks that danced down from the greying sky. He'd nearly finished the north face of the wall when those delicate flakes turned into something more like the heavy ways of thick clumps Techno had been fearing. He finished nailing another slab to the house and gave it a small pat as if willing it to stay together before he hurried around the house to make sure there was nothing in dire need of fixing up.

That's when he heard it; Phil's voice. Phil's voice stretched taut and thin over fear and anxiety that pressed through Techno's voices like a beacon of light in the cacophony.

" _They're coming, old friend. Hide Tommy. L'Manburg hunts for you_."

Techno felt his blood run cold as his muscles burned and his heart pounded.

Phil? L'Manburg? Tommy?

_BUTCHERS! DREAM HIDE Technodumb BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD Philza nuuu hehe house arrest Clipped Wings TOMMY NO! BLOOD! murder TECHNO PLEASE LISTEN ghostbur no! HIDE TOMMY RUN BUTCHERS TECHNO - bad this is bad uh oh POTIONS get the sword PHILZA NO! Tommy HIDE! Take down the TOWER DREAM NO PLEASE TECHNO KILL BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!_

Techno stumbled as red filled his vision and his head pounded.

"What did they do to Phil?" Techno growled as he held his hair. His skin was stretched as his tusks protruded and his face pushed out into his hog appearance. There was a growl on his lips as he looked to the south, the wind on his back howling like the screams in his ears.

"Tommy!" he roared over the wind as he raced for the steps of his home.

How much time did he have? Was Phil in danger? How many were coming? What kind of armor did they have? Should he grab swiftness potions or the turtle master potions? Were fireworks necessary this time - did he have any time to roll up the explosives? Would he have to fight them off? How did they find him? Would they find him? What were they after?

Were they coming for him... or...

"What's up Big T?" Tommy's voice was a jarring invasion to Techno's clouded mind that brought a snarl to his lips as he looked back to the door where the blond flinched.

_Protect DREAM NO hide him Friend PHILZAAAA e e e e BLOOD hideee! TOMMY NO Techno please!_

Almost immediately Techno felt his face soften as he looked at the fear in the boy's eyes; he'd caused that fear. Techno grit his teeth on his tusks and winced as they caused pain to lace up his jaw like a fiery line of magma in his bones. He scrambled to hook up bottles to his brewing stands for extra protection, pouring vials of blaze powder in after the nether wart along with a dash of gunpowder. The voices were building a wall up around him with their tongues, laying every stone with flesh and laying the mortar in blood. They screamed for blood and were swimming like sharks beneath his feet as they threatened to take away whatever foundations he had laid here.

The chanting had grown in volume. The constant chanting in the back of his mind that called for him to spill blood and draw forth screams for _it is in your nature and now they hunt for you so that they can win some sort of vengeance and can say they've won but their victory will be cheap and empty as you will show them blood and spill it on the snow for you are the blood god and we are you and we hunger so feed us blood lord with your enemies_.

"What's going on?" Tommy's voice was shaking.

The chanting lessened for a moment as the coos returned, gently caressing Techno's mind as they reached out for Tommy to try and coddle him, protect him, comfort him. Techno looked up from the brewing stand and looked back at the boy who still stood by the door like he awaited permission to step inside. 

Philza had told him to hide Tommy.

"We have trouble," Techno told him simply as his eyes darted around the room, settling on the crate he'd pushed off in the corner, its dimensions large enough to hold Tommy.

"What kind of trouble?" Tommy asked, keeping his voice together very well even if Techno could hear the terror building in his throat.

"I don't know, Phil said something about L'Manburg hunting me down and he told me to hide you," Techno stated simply as he strode across the room and opened the box, staring inside at the empty dusty wood and nodding. This would work.

"L'Man-L'Manburg?" Tommy asked. "Why - Phil was going to talk to Tubbo, why are they hunting you - "

"Well I don't know Tommy," Techno replied sarcastically, "Maybe because they're a corrupt government who wants to get their revenge!"

He picked up a golden apple from the counter and gripped it in his hand as he glared at its gold-encrusted surface.

So they wanted vengeance? They'd get blood. Nothing but blood.

"I - I don't understand Techno. I thought - " Tommy continued desperately.

Techno, for the first time since this whole panic had set in, looked Tommy in the eyes and took a breath. Tommy was the same tall, lanky sort of kid that he'd always been... but now Techno could see Phil in his eyes and in the way he cocked his head to the side in confusion. There was fear in Tommy's eyes and his posture was unusually rigid.

Phil had asked him to hide Tommy.

He grabbed a handful of invisibility potions from the nearby chest and stuffed them into Tommy's arm before leading him to the crate.

"Tommy, Tommy, listen. I need you to go in there, take these, drink them when I tell you, and hide," Techno ordered. "Sound good?"

"B-but why do I have to hide?" Tommy demanded.

"Tommy - " Techno warned. He needed to hide Tommy. Phil needed him to hide Tommy. Phil needed him to keep Tommy safe. He had to keep Tommy safe.

The voices were screaming now, pounding on his head as they screamed of the danger fast approaching.

"No - no why? Why do I have to hide? If it's L'Manburg then it's my friends and - and maybe - " Tommy argued.

"Tommy - They think you're dead!" Techno snapped. "They think you're dead and you've been with _me_ , Tommy! They did something to Phil and they'll hurt you too if you're with me!"

Tommy looked pale as Ghostbur - oh no, where the hell was Ghostbur? Techno instinctively looked to the snowy window and felt his chest seize. Oh no oh no oh no - 

"You think they'll hurt me?" Tommy asked, his voice wavering.

Techno looked back to Tommy who was hugging the potions to his chest and he could've scoffed. Of course, they would. They exiled him, they'd hurt him. To Techno it wasn't even a question. The power of the government was like acid and a toxin, it had leeched into the earth and Tommy was just beginning to feel the effects knawing on the edge of him. He had started understanding the absolute rot that festered with power - the rot that clung to Techno's chest.

"I don't know Tommy," he lied. "But I don't think you really want to take that chance, so I'm going to finish brewing the potions. You put those invisibility ones in the crate. We should have a few hours before they get here unless they have some highway through the nether or something..."

"What - what about Phil? And Ghostbur?" Tommy demanded.

"Phil is out of commission right now, but that'll be dealt with after this whole thing blows over. I have no idea where Ghostbur is but there's no time for him. For now, you go tear down that tower so that no one knows you're here." Techno explained as he uncorked empty bottles and replaced them with the new strength potions. His mind was racing. 

"Wha - no! Why!?"

"Because I'm trying to hide you and you're making it very difficult! Come on, work with me Tommy!" Techno ordered sharply. His mind was aflame with schemes and plans that he hardly noticed Tommy flinch before slouching back out the door with a pickaxe in hand.

How many would there be? Two? Twenty? Should he set up defenses? Was there time for that? Would the storm hold them off, or hinder his fight? Should he mount Carl and look for Ghostbur? No, that would take too much time - 

"Ghostbur!" Tommy's yelled seemed to smack Techno in the back of his head as the hybrid stepped to the window and saw Tommy back atop his cobblestone tower, chipping away at the stone with a dark enchanted pickax and calling out to the brewing storm. "GHOSTBUR!!"

Techno shook his head as the cold wind bustled through the house, dimming the fire and making Edward let out a sad hum.

Techno let the boy yell his lungs out to the storm as he started more preparations. He left his potions brewing knowing that would take at least an hour so he set to sharpen his sword, re-wrapping the hilt's grip, and ignoring the voices that pounded in his head. Well, he tried to ignore the chanting that writhed under his skin like a parasite.

_Blood for the blood god Blood for the blood god Blood for the blood god Blood for the Blood God Blood for the Blood God Blood For The Blood God Blood For The Blood God BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD **BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD**_

They'd have it. Techno knew that before this day was up, the voices would have it. They'd rejoice and sing and cheer as human blood touched his blade, dressing it up in the sweetest sort of decoration that would litter his home with those red stains that always lay in the back of his eyes.

He'd have blood. They'd have blood.

As much as he hated it, a part of him trembled in anticipation. He'd longed for a worthy fight, his oath binding him to that of a worthy victory. He was made for this, built for this. 

He'd have victory.

He'd have blood.

He cursed himself and cursed his fate as a smile ghosted over his lips, marking him the monster he knew he was.

A monster.

A monster who hurried Tommy into the crate like he was something to be packed and forgotten, shoving the potions and golden apples into his hand as he tried to trick himself into believing that he wasn't cruel and wasn't terrible. A monster who assured the boy that it was all going to be alright because he knew it was. He knew that the rot sloshing under his skin would keep him from losing and that he'd return to the crate with bloodied hands and a monstrous grin that would send Tommy running for cover.

He was a monster who couldn't help but smile as the distant glimmer of torches illuminated the trees after dusk had fallen, nearly hidden by the blinding snow. Even when he saw Ghostbur leading the four butchers he smiled. Even as he saw the panic in Ranboo's eyes he grinned fearlessly. Because despite all his pretentious hopes that he could live peacefully, he was still a monster.

A monster whose voices eagerly hummed now... chanting and chanting and chanting as they lusted for the blood.

He'd deliver it. His hands tightened on the hilt of his sword as he stepped outside, a smile on his hog-like face. He'd deliver it.

~~~

Ranboo couldn't stop trembling. He hadn't stopped trembling since he'd left Philza at the man's doorway. He tried desperately to remember the expression on the avian hybrid's face but it was all fuzzy now, like a wet photograph. Had he been angry? At Ranboo... or at Tubbo...

Ranboo couldn't remember and it was killing him. His hands gripped around the handle of the ax he was holding and felt his heart seize at the thought of their destination. Dream was leading the way, his green cloak flickered in and out of view in the Spruce Forest like some sort of forest spirit...

Ranboo noticed there were no tracks to follow. It was almost like Dream never existed and if it wasn't for the occasional white flash of that terrifying white smile piercing his gaze, Ranboo could almost pretend that he didn't exist...

But Dream did exist and the man was leading them to Techno...

To Tommy...

Ranboo wanted to cry. His throat was closing as he glanced up at the snowing sky who's thick flakes were easy to brush aside and not nearly as painful as raindrops but still stung a bit as they bit his skin. 

"Come on, Ranboo... can't be much farther," Quackity urged as he pat Ranboo on the back, nearly making Ranboo shriek as he too easily imagined that hand to be the head of Dream's ax. Ranboo shakily looked to Quackity and saw that the Vice President wasn't even looking at him. Quackity's eyes were gleaming with some sort of hunger and there was a smile on his face that danced with his warm breath on the wind.

"We've been walking so long!" Fundy complained as he threw his head back.

"We're almost there." Dream was suddenly beside Ranboo and Ranboo did shriek a bit this time as he desperately scrambled away from the masked man who was too close. Too close.

"Geez Ranboo, you're so jumpy," Quackity laughed.

"Lighten up man, it's four versus one, Techno won't stand a chance!" Tubbo smiled warmly at Ranboo as he walked on.

But... but Ranboo didn't want to fight Technoblade. He didn't want them to find Technoblade. He didn't want Dream to find Tommy.

Did Dream know where Tommy was? Was this why he was doing this? Or was Tommy's location still secret? Ranboo wanted to scream and cry and thrash until he was untangled from these threads and questions.

"Are you alright, Ranboo?" Dream's voice was something thick and suffocating that grabbed Ranboo by the throat and choked him. The hybrid went rigid as Dream's gloved hand came up and rested gently on his shoulders. "You seem tense."

"You... you... " Ranboo scrambled to find words. He pleadingly looked ahead of him, where his three friends were leaving him behind to the predator's jaws.

"I?" Dream taunted. "I what, Ranboo? You've been jumpy around me all day, what's wrong with you?"

Ranbo shuddered and clenched the ax in his hands.

"Do you know about Tommy?" Ranboo rasped. Stupid, _stupid_ question but he had to know. He had to know if Dream was here to hurt Tommy - he had to know if Dream knew about Tommy.

"Wow, Ranboo you do have a bad memory. Tommy's dead," Dream sighed, clapping him on his shoulder. "It's alright, we'll fill you in after Tubbo gets his justice."

Well... that wasn't the answer Ranboo was looking for, but surely Dream would've at least taunted him or something if he knew Techno had Tommy... right? No... no Dream wouldn't tell him his plan.

Ranboo watched the masked figure gently follow the other three "butchers" and felt like tearing himself in two. He needed to help Techno! He needed to save Tommy! He couldn't betray Tubbo! 

He held his head and whimpered as he struggled. What to do? What could he do?

"Ranboo! Come on!" Tubbo called from ahead. Ranboo whimpered a bit as he looked up and gingerly followed, his armored paws leaving their heavy indents in the snow like scars as he continued onward, silent and useless.

When he caught up to the group he found them standing before a familiar apparition sitting under a tree.

"Ghostbur!" Ranboo cried as he ran to catch up.

"Oh! Ranboo! You're here too!" Ghostbur greeted warmly. "We're all here now!"

"Ghostbur, what are you _doing_ out here?" Fundy cried gesturing to the thick spruce woodland and the snow falling around them.

"Oh! I'm just hanging out with Techno!" Ghostbur smiled. "Ranboo knows!"

For a moment Ranboo could only hear white noise. He didn't dare look over to see Tubbo's reaction.

"Wh-what?" Ranboo laughed nervously as he kept his gaze fixed on a tree.

"Can't you remember? We were hanging out together!" Ghostbur smiled happily as he floated upwards and danced about the trunk of the tree. "We hid from the rain - I found Friend... where is Friend... oh... oh no... I left them behind - oh dear."

Ranboo felt fear creeping up his spine as he shook. They'd know he was with Ghostbur and they'd know he was with Technoblade - They'd know he betrayed them... they'd know, they'd know, they knew, they - 

"I think you're mistaken, Ghostbur," Tubbo laughed sweetly, kindly even. "You've been missing from L'Manburg for a long time."

"Not that long," Ghostbur denied puzzledly.

"Pretty long," Quackity tacked on.

"Oh..." Wilbur saddened a bit at the thought. "Did I forget again?"

"It's okay - I do it all the time!" Ranboo laughed, trying to mask the fear in his heart. They didn't suspect - why didn't they suspect, wasn't it obvious?

"Hey - Ghostbur, you think you remember where Techno lives?" Quackity demanded.

"Oh! Yes!" Ghostbur clapped. "He's just over that hill. I was wandering a little bit - I didn't have to you see but I thought it would be a good idea and - Oh! Hi Dream!" the ghost drifted out from the safety of one tree to the tree that Dream was under, the masked man had been leaning on a trunk of spruce nonchalantly and his stance didn't change in the slightest as Ghostbur drifted over.

"Hi Ghostbur," Dream sounded pleasant enough but Ranboo thought he sensed a hint of reluctance there and was reminded of the reason Ghostbur had gone wandering in the first place.

"I went wandering - and you're right, it was fun! I found Friend! It was great, thanks so much!" the ghost cheered.

"I'm glad," Dream nodded slightly.

"Ghostbur, we're trying to get to Techno's, and I'm almost certain the masked bastard's gotten us lost," Quackity growled as he gestured to Dream with his head.

Dream scoffed, "We're not lost."

"Oh! I can help! I can take you, it's pretty close!" Ghostbur laughed. "I was just out because Tommy was mad at me and all, but maybe he's better now... maybe I should go back - it has been a while."

Ranboo froze. Tubbo went rigid. Quackity and Fundy looked at the ghost in shock. The entire world seemed to freeze like its breath had been stolen by the ghost's words. Ranboo could hardly think anymore, his heart was pounding in his ears as he realized that everyone, everyone would now know Tommy was alive - Dream would know, Dream would _know_ Tommy was with Techno. Dream would know!

He couldn't - couldn't think. Couldn't remember. Was it bad if Dream knew? Of course, Dream hurts people, he wants to hurt Tommy - he wants to use him. Why? Ranboo didn't _know_ \- he didn't know. Was it bad if Tubbo knew? No... no, it... was it? Tubbo was kind and gentle and... and with _Dream_ , he was with Dream and he laughed with Dream and played with Dream and listened to Dream. _Dream_. Dream who hurt Tommy and would hurt Ranboo and now knew where Tommy was -

"Oh, Ghostbur." Dream's sweet tone felt like Ranboo's mind was swimming in honey and distantly he noticed Dream approaching the ghost casually, his shoulders somewhat lower and his head hanging lower.

"What?" Ghostbur chirped.

"Oh, Ghostbur, Tommy forgave you for that a long _long_ time ago. I told you to go take a walk in the woods around L'Manburg for a bit so I could talk to Tommy and calm him down, I didn't want you to go wander off forever... Oh, Ghostbur, Tommy's gone," Dream's sorrowful charade eased the tension in Tubbo's shoulders and made Quackity relax as well, like little children who'd just gotten their hopes dashed against a rock.

Ranboo still could hardly breathe. Was this Dream's charade? Was he trying to get the others to believe Tommy was still dead - or did he really think Ghostbur was talking about that argument from so long ago? Was this... was this okay? Did Dream still not know? Did he suspect? Ranboo was drowning in that honey-thick tone and he thought certainly that if he didn't figure out what to do he was going to die. If he said the wrong thing he'd sink deeper but if he didn't scream for help he'd continue to struggle...

What could he do!?

What should he do!?

"What do you mean Tommy's gone?" Ghostbur asked, tilting his entire body in confusion.

"Ghostbur, I'm afraid you've been away much longer than you thought - Tommy died," Dream explained sadly.

"What? No... no, I just saw him yesterday. That's silly!" Ghostbur denied with a smile that was faltering.

"I'm sorry," Dream sounded the part. and if Ranboo wasn't certain the masked man was full of shit he may have had the same expression of pity that Tubbo wore.

"Tommy... Tommy can't be dead, that's silly - silly... silly green man... silly green boi..." Ghostbur's voice faded away as the ghost began drifting away into the storm, towards the direction Dream had been leading them. Dream silently gestured them to follow and silently the group progressed after the ghosts whose ramblings were lost to the storm.

"Poor guy," Quackity muttered.

"He'll forget about Tommy in a few minutes," Dream dismissed. "He forgets the bad stuff, remember?"

"He won't forget about Tommy," Ranboo found his voice strangely enough and he used it like he used coarse gravel, letting it fall and scatter to the group. "Ghostbur cares about Tommy, he won't forget about him..."

Dream let out a little hum, something noncommital before tilting his head and looking up at the cloudy night sky above them. They walked for a few minutes before Dream broke the silence again.

"Does it snow often here, Ghostbur?" Dream asked.

Ghostbur perked up and turned around before drifting back to the group that had been trailing him.

"Oh yes, quite often. It's not as bad as the rain in Logstedshire though!" Ghostbur laughed, all joy and smiles again. Ranboo felt his gut plunge for a moment.

"Hey, Ghostbur, what do you think about what happened to Tommy?" Quackity asked, his eyes flickering with some sort of conflicted emotion.

Ghostbur's head tilted. "What happened to Tommy?"

Ranboo felt like he'd just been punched in the gut. He'd... he'd forgotten so fast - not even Ranboo forgot that quickly.

"Jesus," Quackity sighed putting a hand to his head. 

Dream only nodded his head and pressed onward. "Nothing, Ghostbur, don't worry about it. You just can't seem to remember anything important."

Ranboo saw how Ghostbur recoiled after that, he saw the barb that sunk into the ghost's chest and he felt for him.

Fundy, who had been strangely silent since the ghost's arrival, pushed forward as well. He brushed past the ghost and trailed after Dream, his human form melting into thick orange fur as he braved the storm that had picked up, his torch alight and dancing in the wind. Quackity and Tubbo followed suit, Quackity using his larger figure to break up some of the wind for the young president. Ranboo reluctantly followed, Ghostbur by his side.

It took only a minute for Ghostbur to forget why he was downcast and soon he was flitting about the group, talking about Technoblade and his house and his turtles and all the things that brought warm feelings to Ranboo's chest that were quickly dashed with icy horror as he realized what he was about to partake in.

The horror never stopped. As they crested the hill and emerged from the treeline, Ranboo could've screamed. There was the cottage; the lovely, warm, wonderful little cottage. 

And there was Technoblade.

Ranboo had never really realized how _terrifying_ the Blood Lord could be until he was seeing the blatant confidence in the man's stature as he stared them down from his yard. His dark armor glimmered in the dimly lit backdrop of his cottage and his light blue cloak danced in the wind like Techno's loose pink hair that gave him a terrifying mane-appearance; something feral and primal that matched the glare in the man's blood-red eyes.

"Where'd Dream go?" Quackity hissed as he looked around the group. Ranboo was suddenly very aware of the missing member of the group. Had he crested the hill with them? When had he left? Where was he?

Ranboo's heart quickened as he glanced about in the trees and around the snowdrifts desperately looking for the masked monster. Where had he gone? Why had he left!?

"Hi, Techno!" Ghostbur greeted warmly.

"Hello Ghostbur," Techno returned the greeting coldly. 

There was no time for questions. Techno took a step forward and Tubbo with Quackity mirrored him.

"Technoblade, we've come to bring you to trial in L'Manburg," Tubbo stated over the howling wind that was frosting his hair and eyelashes.

Techno gave a small snicker. Ghostbur drifted backward to the protection of the trees but watched the happenings with a bit of confusion on his face.

"I really have no inclination so - I'll pass guys. Now go off back home," Techno waved them off but kept his eyes fixed on Tubbo.

"We can't do that Technoblade," Quackity's tone was dark and sent shivers down Ranboo's spine. The shifter raised his ax threateningly and glared at the pig hybrid with what must be loathing. "You have to answer for what you've done."

Techno scanned them all, his eyes resting on Ranboo for a few moments longer than the others. Ranboo clenched his ax and forced himself to meet Techno's eyes even though he hated it. The eye contact made everything in his body grow taunt and tremble but he begged Techno to read the emotions behind his eyes.

Dream was _here_. Philza was arrested. Tommy was in danger. Ranboo was sorry. Gods, Ranboo was sorry, he hated this. He hated not knowing what to do or how to act. Did he defend Techno or help Tubbo? What could he do what could he - 

"I've been trying," Techno sighed. "I've been trying very hard guys to keep the voices at bay... but they're very unhappy with what's happening here... so are you sure you don't want to rethink what you're about to do?"

As if to answer Quackity and Fundy both raised their axes. Tubbo slowly did the same.

"Fine... Then I choose _Blood_!" Techno raised his hand and slammed a collection of potions down at his feet, their multi-colored liquid swirling around him like ghosts that colored his eyes and seemed to make him glow. Quackity charged first and Technoblade had drawn his sword in a flash, ready to defend the heavy blow of the ax like it was something hardly concerning. Quackity was kicked into the snow where Techno left him to charge after Tubbo.

Fundy and Tubbo moved at once, Fundy taking a running jump and using his light paws to let him fly over the snow and leave shallow footprints in their wake. His ax blow nearly scratched Techno's shoulder as the Warlord avoided Tubbo's own blow. Techno's sword was raised to the sky and came down like a shrieking killer, cutting through Tubbo's shoulder and spilling crimson onto the snow.

Ranboo ran towards the injured president as the boy stumbled back, choking down a scream.

"TUBBO!" Quackitu cried, still getting to his feet.

"Get away from him!" Fundy hissed as he swung his ax again. This time it did connect with Techno's shoulder, slicing through a bit of his cloak and catching his shoulder, golden blood began trickling down Techno's side and the blood lord ruthlessly turned to deal with the fox.

Ranboo skid down the gentle slope until he was next to Tubbo, trying to help stop the bleeding from the deep wound in the kid's shoulder.

"Don't help me! _Get him_!" Tubbo ordered as he weakly raised his ax and glared behind Ranboo to where Techno was likely exchanging blows with Fundy.

Behind him, Fundy shrieked and Ranboo felt like he'd been stabbed. No - no not Fundy.

"FUNDY!" Ranboo cried as he released Tubbo's shoulder and found Techno charging them, Quackity on his heels.

Ranboo's instincts forced him to raise his ax to block Techno's first blow, sparks flying as the two blades met, the heavier of the two forcing Techno's black sword off its course. Quackity came running behind Techno with a fierce yell and Techno turned on his heel to deflect the Vice President's blow as Ranboo lifted his ax again, just in time for the swift-bladed pig hybrid to clash with him again after he must've knocked Quackity right back into the snow.

They were close, Ranboo could see how Techno's breath was still steady, his eyes gleaming with something malevolent and powerful. This wasn't the Techno that picked up baby turtles or spent hours grooming his horse - this was the Techno that gave Tubbo his nightmares and scars. The one that sent everyone running in terror.

But... but this Techno still protected Tommy - he was still Ranboo's friend... right?

"Dream's here," Ranboo breathed, hardly knowing what he was doing as the words tumbled out of his lips. Why - why had he said that?

Techno's eyes flickered for a moment as he shoved Ranboo away. He seemed to think as he took a step back, his eyes running up and down Ranboo's figure like he was trying to understand what he was looking at. Ranboo hoped he saw - hoped he knew how sorry he was. Hoped he saw that Ranboo didn't want to do this!

The moment was lost when Tubbo's ax bit into the warlord's calf, sending the warlord's golden ichor spilling onto the falling snow. Techno hissed in pain as he whirled around and caught Tubbo's side with his blade this time. The boy screamed as he tumbled into the snow, his ax falling from his hands.

Quackity and Fundy rushed Techno as one and pushed him back desperately from the young president.

Ranboo stood there, his feet frozen to the ground as he watched it all. The snow bit at every piece of exposed skin like it was cursing him for his neutrality. All of his friends were getting hurt! All of them!

Fundy's blood was sent out in a terrible bloody arc as Techno's terrifying dance connected with his arm. Quackity had a bruise forming on his face but that didn't hinder him from taking another slash at Techno's arm, glancing off his armor as Techno backed away, his sword quickly slashing to across Quackity's chest, grazing him enough to spill blood and distracting him enough for Techno to kick the guy away yet again. His skills were impossible to ignore - and they were terrifying to watch...

Techno turned on his heel and stalked toward... Tubbo. 

The boy was still recovering from the last hit, blood spilling from his shoulder and side as the boy desperately fumbled to pick up his ax. Techno towered over the boy as he raised his blade - and Ranboo felt his blood grow thick and cold as he realized what he was about to watch.

Techno was going to kill him!

"NO!" Ranboo cried as he rushed forwards to stop that terrifying blade from piecing Tubbo's chest. He was a fighter, he'd spent years in worlds where you survived by fighting and winning in those colosseums and tournaments. He hated to remember that it was true, that he had spilled blood and survived by climbing ranks and leaving others behind, that he had lived a selfish life of solitude while forsaking others. He hated to remember - and he often didn't. 

But his body did. His muscles knew this dance and as he stepped between Techno and Tubbo he did not falter under the other hybrid's incredible strength. He knocked that dark sword away and kept himself rooted before Tubbo, he couldn't let anyone die - he couldn't let Tubbo die!

There was... betrayal? in Techno's eyes and it hurt Ranboo. He felt himself getting torn apart with one part of him desperate to protect the boy behind him and the other screaming to help Techno as the hybrid's golden blood trickled out of his wounds and his red eyes flashed in anger.

Techno would kill him for this - something deep and primal warned Ranboo about that. It warned him just as it warned him about Dream. It vibrated and twisted like an animal writhing in pain, yowling that these beings are ancient and strong, something to be revered and respected, not something to face with an ax and a trembling hand. Techno who bled the golden blood of the gods and Dream who never seemed to bleed were two beings that never should've been crossed...

And yet Ranboo had crossed both.

"I'm sorry," Ranboo trembled.

Techno sneered as he raised his blade again. Ranboo tensed as he took a meager step and tried to prepared himself to deflect the blow - but his mind was tearing itself apart.

This was Techno! The man lent him a coat and made him eat all his dinner like he was some child! Techno was gentle and kind and... and powerful... wrathful... 

Ranboo flinched as tears trickled down his face.

"Outta my way, Ranboo!" Techno ordered.

"I can't do that," Ranboo denied shaking his head fervently as he clenched the hangle of his ax until he was sure there were splinters in his palms.

Techno took a menacing step forward sending a chill up Ranboo's spin - but it was Fundy who stuck first in a glorious glint of a diamond ax that sent Techno stumbling forward and whirling around with all the rage and fury that had sent wither's on L'Manburg and filled Quackity's heart with rage.

Speaking of Quackity, a shrill whinny broke through the howling wind making Techno grow rigid as he grabbed Fundy's neck. Ranboo looked to the side of the house where Quackity was trying to mount a stubborn horse, ax in hand.

"What are you doing to that horse!!" Techno roared as he lifted Fundy off the ground. The fox hybrid squeaked and wheezed as he claws at Techno's arm, his ax forsaken in the snow.

"FUNDY!" Ranboo cried, his voice bordering on a shriek.

Quackity looked down at the uneasy horse he had just mounted and Ranboo saw a sinister smirk of realization. Ranboo knew that look... and he knew that horse. It was Carl.

"Oh, this horse?" Quackity taunted.

"Let him go!" Techno sneered.

"Put Fundy down!" Quackity ordered as he drew the reigns tight and made the horse canter in a tight circle in his pen.

Techno didn't even hesitate. The fox hybrid fell to the ground heavily, wheezing and coughing to reclaim his lost breath.

"Fundy!" Ranbo scrambled over and fell to his knees to try and see the extent of the damage. 

Quackity strode the horse out of his pen and kept it still as he stared Techno down. 

"Take off your armor!" Quackity snapped. Tubbo had somehow gotten to his feet and was holding his bleeding side, trying to limp up to the group.

"Don't you hurt that horse Quackity!" Techno growled.

"If you don't want me to hurt the horse drop the fucking sword! And the armor!" Quackity was almost roaring over the howling wind.

It was almost like a fever dream. Quackity was the picture of control atop the steed that he held tightly by the reigns, his ax glimmering dangerously from the cottage lights. Techno, who was still the most terrifying thing in the tundra by far, obeyed. His sword went to the ground and quickly his armor went clattering to the snow along with his fur-lined cloak until it was only him in his cotton clothes and leather bindings.

"Now, Techno," Quackity drawled. "You're gonna come with us, or... _Carl_ is gonna get it." The shifter ran his hand along the name etched into the horse's armor and snickered.

Techno only snarled.

A strange silence descended on the group as they stood in this standstill with only the wind to break it up. Blood lay strewn on the snow like splotches of paint on a white canvas. 

"Ranboo... pick up his stuff," Tubbo rasped his order and Ranboo immediately obeyed. He gingerly picked up Techno's armor, remembering the hours the man had spent on it all, and carefully stowed it in his space dimension. He threw Techno the most reassuring look he could, he would return all of this.

Techno only glared at him.

Ranboo flinched. He didn't want this. He'd been home for three minutes before Quackity had grabbed him, threw a bloodied apron at him, and told him they were going to get justice. He'd watched them torment Philza... he'd been powerless as Dream led the way... and he was helpless now...

He was just useless, wasn't he?

He was useless as Tubbo and Fundy tied Techno's hands behind his back and was useless as they began leading him back to the shoreline where across the sea L'Manburg was waiting for his trial... and perhaps his execution.

Ranbo shuddered at the thought.

"Where the hell did Dream run off too?" Quackity asked from the rear as he scanned the forest. "The bastard just dipped for the battle. What a jerk."

Techno's ears flicked at the name and slowly, the hybrid looked sideways at Ranboo.

Ranbo slowly met his eyes as they walked and he felt like the man was trying to tell him something with that look.

Dream was gone... Dream was gone and Techno was asking him for help? Was that what that look was? Techno wanted him to help now -

Tommy.

The word hit Ranboo like a ton of bricks as he realized what the look in Techno's eyes was. They were walking towards the shore, the cottage a few minutes behind them... the cottage _Tommy_ was still in. The cottage _Dream_ was still around!

Dream knew - Dream must've known... maybe... or maybe Tommy was still safe and Dream just didn't want to fight Techno... maybe... maybe...

"Guys!" Ranboo's voice came out strained.

"What?" Quackity snapped.

What could he say? What could he say!?

"I - I think I lost my memory book in the fight, I'm gonna go back to find it," he lied - he then cursed himself because that was the lamest excuse he'd ever come up with. Why was he even making excuses - he trusted these people... right?

He looked to Techno. Techno with his golden wounds and hands bound tightly to his back and Ranboo realized with a started that no... he didn't trust them.

"Oh, come on? Seriously?" Quackity moaned.

"I'll catch up with you guys," Ranboo choked as he turned around and ran back to the cottage.

"Ranboo - wait! Ranboo!" Tubbo called after him.

But Ranboo couldn't wait. He didn't know what to do or who he should help - or how to help. But he did know that if Tommy was in trouble, then it was his fault, and he had to help. Because he'd gotten Philza arrest and he'd gotten Techno captured and he'd gotten Tommy exiled and he was the cause of all of this!

He raced through the woods back to the warmth of the cottage where he could only pray - pray that Tommy was safe.

He'd betrayed Phil, betrayed Techno, betrayed Tubbo, Quackity, Fundy, Niki, everyone, _everyone_... but he couldn't betray Tommy now. He couldn't leave him knowing Dream was around.

Maybe everything was fine. Maybe he was freaking out for nothing... maybe...

Maybe the door to Techno's cabin had always been open... right? Ranboo looked at the cottage down the bluff and felt his heart seize as he glimpsed a flash of green in the window descending the ladder as the door to Techno's house swung wildly on its hinges in the wind.

Oh no.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay okay okay, I know it's been a while - my bad. This chapter was originally going to be longer but as soon as I realized what I wanted to accomplish was going to take like 10,000 more words I held off and split the chapter in two. Sorry it took a while but I just kept wrestling with this chapter because I felt it was too flat, but maybe that's just because I think I'm bad at combat, I dunno.  
> Anyway - what did you guys think? I'm interested, who has your favorite POV and why?   
> Does anyone have any predictions?  
> Don't mind me, I'll be in my corner writing more angst for this fanfiction ~ bye~


	16. Rencounters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dream is good at hide-and-seek (he's totally cheating with the compass).  
> Tommy can't take much more of this, he's going to have a heart attack one of these days.  
> PIGS FLY TODAY MOTHERFUCKERS!!!  
> TECHNO NEVER DIES!  
> Oh - but everyone else can die... haha~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: drowning

Silence.

It was a funny word, honestly, because the harder Tommy listened, the more he realized silence didn't fucking exist. "Silence" was full of shit. The house groaned under the wind and the wooden panels on the windows shuddered against their bearings. The fire crackled and grumbled alongside Edward's small warbles somewhere off to the side. Even Tommy couldn't find it in himself to be silent. Every small movement set off a rustle of clothing that seemed deafening to him as it rang through the house. Sometimes, he'd shift and the bottles of invisibility in his hands would clink together, he'd flinch whenever that happened, nearly certain that it would alert someone to his hiding place.

Stupid fucking hiding place this was. Stupid Techno. Stupid stupid _stupid_.

Tommy closed his eyes and pressed his face to his knees as he hugged the potions to his chest. His breathing sounded like it was decibels louder than it should be - much like his heartbeat. His throat was dry and his skin was prickling as his transparent self sat hidden in that crate that filled Tommy's nose with the smell of cut wood.

It was stupid to be scared right now - he was stupid to be scared right now. It was fine - he was fine. Techno was the one going out and fighting people...

Fighting Tubbo.

Tommy hugged his knees tighter and hissed down a string of curses as the usual fog clung to his mind. Tubbo was a friend, but Tubbo exiled him... Tubbo had done something to Phil... Tubbo was going to hurt Technoblade. Technoblade! The guy who had hurt Tubbo and tried to kill Tommy and spawned withers in L'Manburg! The guy who had... who had given him this coat and those shoes and made him the armor that he still had on under all his layers... who had looked fucking _worried_ when he told Tommy to hide and handed him a shit ton of potions.

Techno wasn't bad... Tubbo wasn't bad... but they were fighting one another so one of them had to be bad - right!?

He would cry - he would _fucking_ cry. He was a big man, he was a grown fucking man and he was fine. He would be fine. He was hiding in a big wooden box with his head in his knees trying not to cry - but he would be fine!

He angrily wiped at his eyes and let out a long breath as he looked up at the top of the crate that had been closely placed back over him. His antsiness brought his hands up to try and lift the lid when he froze.

Techno would be back - he had said to wait.

But, fuck him, right? He'd been in this stupid box for what felt like forever. It had to have at least been fifty minutes (that was almost a whole fucking hour!) and it had to be safe by now. 

No - no, Tommy just needed to hide until Techno got this all sorted out.

Right?

Tommy pressed his palms into his head and groaned. Why the fuck was his mind so shitty? He couldn't decide shit like this. He couldn't - hell he couldn't get his heart to stop pounding.

Tommy was so entrenched with the incredible loudness of his heartbeat that he missed the sound of the first step creaking.

He didn't miss the second though. It was one of the higher steps leading to the front door - there were three that creaked terribly (Phil had been meaning to fix them), two that sagged, and one that was missing a nail. Techno never did care to avoid the creaking stairs... but...

There were no footsteps. Techno's hooves were a familiar sound to Tommy, how those annoying split toes of keratin clicked and snapped against the wood like tap shoes. But there was no tapping now.

The door creaked open and Tommy felt his chest slowly start shrinking in around his heart that was beating furiously at his chest as it screamed to be let out.

He was being stupid. It was just Techno. He'd just come back...

So why wasn't Tommy lifting the lid?

His fingers silently brushed against the top of the lid as he prepared to push it up, but a moment of hesitance saved him.

"Oh, Tommy~" 

Something grabbed Tommy's lungs and froze them. 

Silent footsteps ghosted around the room, inches away from Tommy's crate. Someone's familiar airy chuckle drifted through the air and wrapped its claws around Tommy, sinking under his skin and digging into his flesh. 

Dream, _Dream_! It was Dream!

Tommy's chest wanted to scream, his lungs wanted to sob, his muscles and his bones begged him to screech and call for help. Call for Techno, Tubbo, Philza, _anyone_. He immediately put a hand over his mouth and muzzled his own lips. 

"Tommy~ I know you're here," Dream's voice was something light, playful almost. It danced in the air and seemed to bounce off every side of Tommy's brain as it fed something deep and dark in the back of his mind. The part of Tommy that rejoiced a bit at the thought of Dream coming for him - the part of him that told Tommy to apologize and beg for forgiveness until Tommy thought he was going to be sick from his own thoughts.

Dream had _never_ been his friend.

"You can come out Tommy!" Dream called, "I'm just here to take you home!"

Something wet slid down Tommy's face nearly making him tremble and shriek in fear thinking that it was one of Dream's fingers caressing his skin. It was just his tears. He was fucking crying. He was so pathetic he was fucking crying. Tommy shoved both hands over his mouth to try and cover up any sound of sobs that would dare come next. He couldn't even breathe normally he was so pathetic. He pressed harder as his lungs tried to pry more air from the world around them, trying to get him caught. His own fucking body was trying to betray him.

Dream would fucking find him! He'd hear him breathing - oh god could he hear his heart? It was slamming against his ribs now, pressing against his lungs that were trying desperately to grab air from beyond Tommy's fingers that were pressed against his nose and mouth.

Tommy's tears dripped onto Tommy's shirt and in a panicked moment, Tommy felt his vision fade. He couldn't breathe - he wouldn't breathe! Not when Dream was right fucking there. No - no...

"Are you upstairs?" Dream's voice was distant now and in a moment of desperation, Tommy released his face and let his lungs grab another bit of air so that he wouldn't pass out. He tried to force himself to breathe slowly but his lungs were shaking so terribly they couldn't even seem to breathe right.

He closed his eyes again and suppressed a shudder. It was dark in the box, dark and enclosed and fucking small, and Dream was _right_ above his fucking head.

"Hmm, nope... but I would bet you're somewhere around here, the question is just up or down..." Dream's voice drifted down from where the ladder to the upstairs was and Tommy clamped his hands back over his mouth as he heard Dream's sweet tone grow closer.

It was fine, it was fine. He had another few minutes before his invisibility ran out and the golden apples Techno had given him made him feel a bit sturdier... so why... why was he shaking? Why was he so fucking - 

"Oh, Tommy," Dream tutted. Fucking condescending prick... at least that's what Tommy would've thought if Dream's voice hadn't seemed to be inches away from him, hovering over the box. His mind was blank, his heart was clawing at his chest begging, sobbing to be let out as his lungs started screaming for air again.

The lid of the crate flew open as a terrifyingly pale hand with fingerless gloves and familiar scars struck out with the speed of a snake and grabbed the closest invisible thing they could; Tommy's hair. Those familiar fingers buried into his locks and grabbed as much of it as they could before they yanked. Tommy yelped as he was helplessly forced to comply with the physical demand, his invisible form being pulled into the air like a puppy held up by its scruff. 

Tommy only caught a glimpse of green and white before the world was turning sideways and he was slamming into Techno's brewing table. He cried out in pain as his ribs slammed against the wood and his weight caused Techno's unclaimed bottles to go teetering off the edge. They smashed into the wood at Tommy's feet, some bounced and rolled, some shattered. The noise mixed with his aching scalp and the throbbing in his ribs brought tears to Tommy's eyes as he desperately tried to scramble away from Dream, fuck it was _Dream_. 

Dream with his strong hand that grabbed his shoulder blindly and forced him back to the ground, forced him to be still. Dream with his mask the color of bone and a sick smile that laughed and jeered at Tommy's tears and whimpers.

"Tommy, Tommy, Tommy... I'm very disappointed in you," Dream scolded gently as his hand probed at Tommy's invisible form, eventually settling on the side of Tommy's face while his other kept a firm grip on Tommy's shoulder keeping him sitting there, still and motionless as he stared at that smile - that fucking mask of a smile.

Tommy wanted to scream. Techno had to still be outside, he had to hear him right. He had to scream.

He tried to scream.

Dream's hand had found his face and it easily found his throat.

"Shhh," Dream soothed. "Don't be difficult."

Tommy writhed as the hand tightened around his throat and panic blinded him. Dream was going to kill him. Dream was going to fucking suffocate him and he couldn't do anything about it. His hands flew to Dream's arm and clawed at it but it was like prying at a metal bar whose jaws had closed around his jugular. The mask stared into his eyes with something akin to passiveness but the hand around Tommy's throat continued to cut Tommy's lungs off. They screamed. They rebelled and convulsed much like Tommy did as he desperately tried to writhe out of Dream's grip. His hands desperately flew to his side to try and find anything to use as his vision began to grow cloudy and fuzzy, the whites and greens of his foe encompassing the entire world around him.

There.

Tommy's fingers weakly closed around the neck of a bottle to his side and blindly (gods he hoped it wasn't a strength potion) he flung it into Dream's face. Right into that stupid fucking mask that had haunted Tommy's dreams since he saw the thing.

The glass shattered apart as it made contact with the strong mask and some deep red liquid sprayed over both Dream and Tommy making Dream recoil and giving Tommy the chance to rip out of his hold and scramble for the ladder, even as the potion ate away at his skin like acid.

Oh... Techno hadn't grabbed his instant damage potions.

Tommy leaped down to the basement, stumbling as the potion stung and burned into his skin leaving its splattered dapple burns in pink on his pale skin. Tommy summoned a pickax to his hand and was breaking into the crawl space without a second thought. He'd hidden there last time, he'd hide there again.

_"Put your stuff in the hole, Tommy"_

Tommy swallowed a sob as he blocked up the hole above him and quickly began tunneling his own little hole in the crawl space that he blocked back up and cowered in. He had no more invisibility potions - they'd been left upstairs and he only had maybe five more minutes with this one - what was he going to do?

A piece of rock was broken somewhere nearby and through the wall, Tommy heard the gentle sound of someone jumping into the hole - Dream, probably landing like some cat.

"Tommy!" Dream snapped, his voice bouncing off the walls o the crawl space and permeating through the rock Tommy cowered behind.

Dream was mad. Tommy knew the tone and he knew what it meant. His body trembled to remember and his mind was screaming at him. Tears were streaming down his face and his chest was trembling with every breath. There were apologies, _apologies_ on his lips like he had something to be sorry for. 

He wanted to puke. He wanted to throw up every part of him that begged him to crawl out and beg for forgiveness like some fucking dog. He had nothing to beg for - it wasn't his fault it was Dream's. It wasn't his fault - it was _Dream's_.

"Tommy," Dream's muffled voice was gentler now, all soft again like his cloak that probably still smelled like dew and grassy days in a forest under blue skies listening to the sound of waves on a distant beach. "Tommy, if you come out, I won't get mad."

Tommy hugged himself and slid down to a sitting position where he could keep himself from being tempted by the fucker's words.

" _He's a friend. He won't hurt us if we listen_ ," that little fucker of a voice whispered. Tommy clenched his jaw as he held himself tighter. 

Friends don't do that... Friends don't hurt you if you don't listen...

" _Techno hurt you, he's your friend. Tubbo hurt you, he's your friend. Phil hurt you_ \- "

Tommy bit down on his tongue hoping it would somehow silence the fucking voice. He wasn't to go grovel, he wasn't going to fucking beg for forgiveness.

"Oh, come on Tommy, stop being difficult," Dreams sigh just barely made it through the stone wall - but his pickaxe did.

Tommy couldn't help but scream "shit" as Dream's dark pickaxe easily ripped through Tommy's stone wall and brought down the only thing separating Tommy from that terrifying mask.

His adrenaline tried to make him run. He tried to bolt past Dream and leap for the hole in the ceiling but Dream was grabbing the collar of his shirt and throwing him into the next stone wall before he could react. Tommy choked on his next swear as he crumbled to the ground. 

"I'm sorry - " the words were out of his lips before he could control them.

Fuck. Fuck no, no he didn't want to apologize. He didn't want to tremble and sob and beg because that was pathetic... he was pathetic.

"Please, please Dream, I'm sorry! I'm sorry, I am! I'm sorry!" Tommy hated himself. Shame washed over his shoulders and wrapped around his throat choking out the next apology as he curled up on himself and waited for Dream's boot to connect with his side.

Instead, he was greeted with a small hum of approval.

Dream's hand was in his hair and was forcing him to sit up before Tommy could do anything. Always in his hair. Dream always had his hands in his fucking hair.

It wasn't like Wilbur - Wilbur had only done it at night when it was late and dark. Only when Tommy had some sort of fucking nightmare. Now Dream was the nightmare and he wasn't stroking Tommy's hair he was clinging to it, using it to control him like a little puppet on a string or a dog on a leash. Tommy couldn't help but whimper as Dream's fingers tugged a bit harder at his golden hair.

"Sorry for what, Tommy?" Dream asked "The betraying me? The hurting me? Or are you just saying that to get out of trouble!?"

"No - No - no I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Tommy's lips weren't even fucking listening to him anymore. They were spewing whatever fuckery his tongue came up with and riding on the quick breaths that could hardly keep him conscious with his lungs convulsing in panic.

"I don't think you are, Tommy," Dream lectured with a small shake of his head and a sigh.

"I am... I am, please Dream," Tommy rambled. "Please - please I - I -"

"Let him go!"

The call took both Dream and Tommy by surprise.

Down from the ceiling fell the familiar monochromatic face of Ranboo, his jaw opened and his fangs glinting in the dim light as his sword appeared in his hand, pointed at Dream.

"Let him go, Dream," Ranboo's voice shook but his stance was firm and his eyes were sharpened. There was something monstrous about his form now, something that hunched his tall back and unhinged his jaw.

"Hello, Ranboo," Dream greeted coldly, releasing Tommy's hair with a jerking motion that nearly sent Tommy to the floor.

"Tommy. Run." Ranboo ordered as he took a step forward and shifted his back foot.

Tommy couldn't breathe. He pushed himself back up to his feet and fearfully looked from Dream to Ranboo, always back to Dream. Dream was still, patient and steadfast, his mask turned to Ranboo now but it could easily snap back to Tommy in an instant.

The little fucker of a voice told him to stay, then he wouldn't get in trouble and he'd be safe.

"Tommy! RUN!" Ranboo's order shattered the fog in Tommy's mind for a moment as the hybrid let out an enderman-like screech and charged the masked man. Ranboo was tall but holy shit he moved fast. Dream's ax appeared in his hand and heavily slammed against Ranboo's sword but Ranboo didn't crumble under the blow like his twig-like body should have. The ax slid off the blade of the sword in a colorful spray of sparks that lit up the ground near Tommy and set a metaphorical fire at his feet,

He was jumping for the low hole in the ceiling before he could think. He needed to get Techno - he needed to get Techno!

His throat, which had been fucking useless the whole time it seemed finally got its act together and let his lungs catch their breath allowing Tommy to let out the most desperate cry he could manage as he climbed the ladder that led out of the basement. He was happy Techno had moved Bob and Friend to the fucking stable he'd been building or else Dream would probably fucking kill them too! He threw the basement doors open and ran out into the snow.

Carl was gone. That was wrong... where was the horse!?

Tommy scrambled out and froze as he saw the scene before him in the snow. Blood... blood was thrown on the snow in little splotches... Techno was nowhere to be seen. 

Shit... shit.. shit!

Tommy looked around, cupping his hands to his mouth as his throat allowed him to let out another hoarse scream: "TECHNO!"

His voice was ripped away from him in the wind that was stinging his eyes and lapping up the tears in his eyes.

No time - there was no time and no response. Tommy looked around wildly feeling like an animal with its foot caught in a snare. He had to run - he had to get away. He looked to the mountains to his right and the dark forest to his left and quickly bolted around the house until he was running further north, through the foothills and valleys, through the snow and wind...

Anywhere, _anywhere_ to get away from Dream!

~~~

When the L'Manburg president returned to his country in one piece, Philza knew they'd won. He had one boot broken to pieces besides his dented furnace and had been working on the other one, sawing it away on the stone cutter when he heard the young president's voice ring through the air from a distance. They'd only been gone a few hours! How - how were they back already!? 

Phil's wings ruffled and he grit his teeth as he pressed the iron boots further into the blade, not even caring if it would catch his skin. This boot needed to come off.

"Oh, I'm not gonna lie, I'm excited - I'm excited about this Techno!" Quackity - that was Quackity. He sounded smug and arrogant and ready for Phil's fist in his face. Phil swallowed a snarl as he lifted his nearly broken boot of the stone grinder and ran over the window to see what had happened.

"Oh yeah? I couldn't tell. You know - it's not like the eagerness to ender pearl a bajillion times to get me here clued me in to that. How many pearls did we use, was that really necessary? No wonder your economy is in shambles."

Phil was able to crack a smile as he found the owner of that voice; Techno was alright.

For now. His head was low and he was limping from a wound in his calf that was leaking golden blood. His hair looked a real mess but it was his eyes that carved into Philza's heart. They were dim, dark even. Techno looked defeated and that was a dangerous thing to be - for any godling, but Techno especially. The smile quickly fell from Philza's face.

"You actually got him," Philza growled. His eyes darted over to Quackity who was looking so proud as he sat atop Techno's fucking horse. They'd used his fucking horse to get him. Cowards. Spineless fucking cowards. There was next to _nothing_ Techno dared to care about and every chance the universe got it took to use what the kid loved against him.

Cowards.

"PHIL!" Techno pulled against Fundy and Tubbo who were trying to hold him, his eyes wide with fear. Philza's heart ached and he wanted nothing more than to fly down and wrap his arms around Techno until that scared looked went away.

  


_"I... I didn't mean to hurt it, Phil... Phil, I didn't mean to!"_

_It had only been a sheep but the little pig hybrid couldn't stop looking at his bloodied hands. Philza saw the fear in his eyes and was gentle as he wrapped him up in his arms and folded the wings around the both of them._

_"I know you didn't mate."_

_"I didn't want to hurt it," Techno's little voice was nothing short of heartbreaking as the teenager pushed the wings aside looked at his beloved sheep in terror. "They... they told me ... I didn't mean to... they needed to be fed... I didn't - I didn't - Phil I'm sorry!"_

  


"Phil! What did they do to you!?" Techno was on the border of hysteria. Philza felt anger grow in his chest as the man's voice broke.

"I'm fine - just house arrest," Phil was quick to assure him. He looked down at the sole intact boot and gave Techno a firm look. "It won't be for long."

Techno knew that tone. His eyes lit up and Phil allowed himself a small smile. Gods, he loved that boy - always quick to recognize what was happening. He'd get Techno out of this.

Speaking of what they needed to get Techno out of, Phil's eyes drifted over to the dark tower built in the city square with an anvil hanging there, swaying ever so slightly in the wind like a black flag. He needed to get the boot off. He ducked back into the house and sat down beside the wall before slamming his boot into the stonework.

"Technoblade," Tubbo's voice was somewhat high and angelic which was nothing short of fucking ironic given the situation. Philza slammed his foot harder against the stone. 

"You've caused the people of L'Manburg pain and suffering. You hurt us and fled before you could be brought to justice. That is why we are here today, to see justice delivered as it should've happened a long time ago," Tubbo's speech only made Philza's blood boil as he tried to break it up with the sound of metal slamming against stone.

"Yo - Philza, shut the fuck up!" Quackity called up.

"A man can do whatever the fuck he wants in his own house, especially if he's stuck in it forced to listen to you fucks!" Philza shot back without hesitation as he continued.

"What is he even doing?" Fundy's questioning tone almost made Philza see red. Fundy... the fucking traitor.

Tubbo continued, hardly missing a beat. Gods, the kid had nerve. "So, Technoblade, for the destruction of L'Manburg, the attack on our citizens, and for all the pain and fear and suffering you've caused, we've sentenced you to death."

"Whoa - what happened to my trial!?" Techno's voice shot up through the sky making Philza's spirit soar. That was Techno for you. 

"We're forgoing the trial and skipping straight to the part where you pay for what the fuck you did!" Quackity snapped.

Shit - he was running out of time. Philza slammed his foot into the wall and rejoiced as a thick crack laced up the iron plating of his heel. Almost there.

"Hi Phil!" 

Philza almost jumped out of his skin as he looked beside him to find Ghostbur sitting there. A smile on his face.

"Wil- Ghostbur," Philza greeted, getting over the shock and going right back to breaking his boot. No time to be relieved that his dead son was alright when another was on the fucking chopping block.

"How are you, Phil?" Ghostbur chirped.

"I've been better," Philza grit as yet another crack laced up the side of the boot from a hard slam into the stone.

"So, any last words, Techno?" Tubbo's voice rang through the air and Philza felt panic closing in on his throat. He needed more time gods dammit!

"Ghostbur! Distract them!" Philza ordered.

"Distract who?" Ghostbur asked peeking up over the window and smiling at whatever scene greeted him.

"Oh hi everyone! We're all here!" Ghostbur greeted as he waved eagerly. It was so reminiscent of young Wilbur waving goodbye to Techno that Philza had to bite his tongue and force himself to stay focused instead of getting lost in memories.

"Hello Ghostbur," Techno's deadpan voice would've made Philza smile in different circumstances.

"Hey, can we get on with this?" Quackity's cold demand rang from the window.

"Tubbo! Hey, wait Tubbo! Why are you wearing armor in L'Manburg!?" Ghostbur called. "Did the law change?"

Philza could've laughed in jubilation as Wil's sharp little brilliant mind lived on his ghost. He could almost see Tubbo falter in hesitance, at least he hoped the kid did - he hoped the kid at least saw the laughable hypocrisy going on here. Phil almost did laugh as his boot shattered with the next blow, iron plating clattering to the ground and the leather holding it together falling into little strange under that weight.

Fuck yes.

"No, Ghostbur, they haven't changed," Tubbo's voice returned, sounding tired - not that Phil gave a fuck anymore.

"Oh... so then have you changed, Tubbo?" Ghostbur asked, tilting his head a bit.

Philza stayed crouching as he took off his cloak and let his wings stretch out behind him. He'd have to time this right. He stalked over to the side of the window and stood up, carefully peering around the edge to see what was happening. Fundy and Quackity sat in the empty audience chairs with Techno - oh gods, he was in a cage. He stood in a small cage with the anvil suspended right above him.

Philza readied himself.

"No, Ghostbur... I haven't changed," Tubbo assured the ghost.

"Oh! Good! Hey Phil what was I supposed to do again?"

"You did wonderfully, Ghostbur, thank you," Phil smiled, perhaps darkly, as he backed away from the window and took a running leap through the open hole in the wall. His wings spread elegantly after he dove through the square and with a powerful flap he was diving down for the open cage that house Techno.

"PHILZA - " Fundy choked upon seeing his wings.

"He has his wings!!" Quackity cried.

"Pull the lever!" Tubbo practically screamed as he realized what the survivor was aiming for.

Techno only met Phil's gaze with a smirk on his snout as his huge hog-like form melted away into the lighter human one, an arm raised. Philza watched Quackity scramble for the lever in the corner of his eyes but couldn't help but laugh in a taunt because it was far too late.

Somewhere above them the anvil's rope was snapped and the heavy death sentence began plummeting, but Phil's hands were already wrapping around Techno's outstretched wrist and pulling him upwards with his mighty wings that splayed out on either side of him like enormous thunder clouds, easily pulling the Blood Lord off his feet and out of that damned cage. 

They took to the sky as a hideous crashing sound echoed behind them. The anvil collided with the cage, splintering wood and bending squealing metal under its incredible weight that just a moment ago was meant to execute the Blood Lord himself.

Techno was cackling, laughing as he taunted the people behind him, his spirits soaring with Phil's own heart as he carried Tech even higher.

"HA! Later losers! Technoblade never dies!" Techno's voice carried through the wings along with Phil's laughing as he flapped again, shoeless and free.

For a moment, he felt untouchable - 

And then something echoed through everyone's head - a message of death that was common for those conscious when another died. A message that reminded Philza that he hadn't seen Dream return with the group - that Tommy was still home unprotected...

A message that reminded him that Ranboo hadn't returned either.

_Ranboo drowned_

~~~

Ranboo felt fear prickling up his spine like an invasive touch. It was encasing every bit of him in cold ice and boiling blood that pounded in his ears and drove his next strike. Dream was powerful.

It wasn't the usual "skill" or "prowess" that Ranboo had met in competitions where victory was paved in blood and skill... it wasn't raw strength either. Ranboo had seen raw strength, felt how it made his knees buckle, and watched it splinter his shields. He'd seen skill and prowess in how opponents danced around his blade, their feet following patterns committed to memory.

Technoblade had been raw power, skill, and prowess all wrapped into one. He'd been strong and unshakeable, something ancient and battle-hardened. His movements were fast and strong, his feet steady and sure. He had been something like a statue, something you couldn't take down no matter how hard you tried for his defense was too closed and his mind too sharp.

Dream was something completely different. He was wild and unpredictable, he was strength and chaos wrapped into a terrifying hurricane of green with its eye being that white mask that glinted with every spark that flew. His ax came down with the heaviness of a thunder strike but his feet never made a sound as they lept and glided around Ranboo.

Ranboo was outmatched. It was obvious. He was outmatched in every sense of the word. He played defensively, his instincts and eyes catching the blows that came for him and his sword coming up to deflect them. He barely had time to make his own counter strikes before Dream was jumping at him again with his dark ax blade glinting menacingly. Ranboo dodged and weaved out of the way, every strike growing closer and closer to his skin like some sort of ticking clock.

He reached the timer when Dream feinted him, his ax raising to come from above bringing Ranboo's own sword up to block it before Dream swung down in some sort of warped curve that avoided his sword and slammed right into his side. 

Netherite armor buckled under the blow, not breaking but crashing into Ranboo's side like a boulder. Oh, that would definitely be a nasty bruise tomorrow, maybe even a broken rib. Ranboo gasped but his body was already moving, his instincts driving his sword towards the exposed shoulder that his blurry vision just barely made out.

His sword pierced something soft and for a moment Ranboo rejoiced. The next moment, he had Dream kicking him back, his paws catching on a piece of rock as he stumbled back. He never got a moment to recover as Dream's next blow swung low and sliced into his thigh.

Ranboo screamed. He crumpled as Dream's ax carved through his leg like butter, the butcher taking a moment to dislodge it from his leg cruelly.

Ranboo tried to roll to his feet, his hand wrapped around the hilt around his blade that was still stained with Dream's dark blood that was now a growing stain on Dream's shoulder. 

He had to get back up. Tommy needed more time.

Dream kicked him in his bruised side and Ranboo screeched, his body flickering as panic threatened to set in. He was going to die here - he was going to _die_!

"That was impressive, Ranboo," Dream... praised? Dream was praising him?

There was a clatter as Dream kicked Ranboo's sword across the room and through foggy eyes, Ranboo registered Dream crouching down in front of him, the mask was just barely out of his vision - its smile was the only thing he could focus on.

"I underestimated you - that was a great fight. Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to go have a few words with Tommy," Dream's laugh was distant as the boots silently walked away, towards the hole in the ceiling Ranboo had jumped down... towards Tommy.

No... no, _no_.

Ranboo curled in on himself as he rolled on his arms and knees. Pushing himself to his feet felt like a herculean feat and he knew that even once he was standing, he wasn't going to be able to take chase after Dream who was already on the next floor up.

His body twisted and contorted as his mind went to war with itself, devouring his thoughts as all of his attention focused on the green monster getting away.

No... no, he would not let Dream get Tommy. Not Tommy no - no - no - _no_ \- _**no**_!

His body writhed and shook as he got to his feet...

And suddenly he was phasing through space and time, his body was split into thousands of little parts that all thought the same thought and wished the same thing until he was manifesting behind Dream who was climbing up the ladder. His claws hooking around the man as he pulled him off the rungs with all of his might and slammed him into the stone floor.

Dream made a surprising sort of sound as he hit the floor, but he didn't lay there stunned as Ranboo had hoped. Dream twisted like a snake, his hands wrapping around Raboo's ankle and his feet sliding across the ground until Ranboo's long legs were entwined with Dream's own, and the hybrid went toppling to the ground upon Dream's command. Ranboo's head slammed into the stone and his eyes buzzed with color and shapes for a moment, the shock and awe at what he had just done still very prevalent.

What... had he just... Did he teleport? Could he do that?

"Well, look at that," Dream's rasp was suddenly much more terrifying than his honey-thick tone. Ranboo felt Dream release his legs and he tried to focus on the green shape that was becoming bigger and bigger in his vision. His leg burned where it bled and his side ached from the impact of Dream's ax. He tried to push himself up again, somewhat aware that he'd left his sword downstairs but not quite cognitive to recognize how stupid that had been.

"Well... you're just full of surprises, aren't you?" Dream asked as a hand wrapped around the back of Raboo's suit and dragged him across the room like a kitten being pulled by its mother. Ranboo tried to fight back, flailing meagerly as a strange sort of sound left his lips, not a mew, but some sort of whine that definitely wasn't human.

"Well, now you're a little more than an annoyance so I'll have to come back to you later." Dream didn't even seem to be talking to him anymore. His voice was distant and dull as he dragged Ranboo across the room. Where was he going? 

Ranboo tried to shake his head to get rid of the buzzing in his brain. He blinked his eyes to get a sense of his surroundings.

Nothing, nothing warned him of what was about to happen until Dream's grip shifted to the back of his neck and his face was hovering over a water hole dug into the ground that, distantly, Ranboo remembered Techno had used for his cow, Bob. Huh... where had Techno put that c-

The water rushed upwards to meet Ranboo's face, engulfing him all the way up to the neck where Dream's steeling grip kept him steady. He thrashed as the buzz in his mind burst into terror and pain. The water ate up his skin like acid and pressed against his lips and nose eagerly. He twisted and jerked as viciously as he could, trying to breach the surface that he knew, he _knew_ was only a few centimeters above him, he could feel the cold air on his neck.

He screamed. It was a poor idea in hindsight but the terror that ran through his veins was so primal and ancient that it pushed all other thoughts away until he was nothing but instincts and desperation. He could feel his body flickering and he tried to will himself to teleport again but there was water creeping into his nose as his foolish senses tried to make him breathe.

He was ripped out of the water in a moment of mercy and Ranboo gasped and coughed as Dream's grip on his neck hardened.

"This isn't how I wanted this to go, but I can't kill you directly right now. Sorry. But don't think we're done, Ranboo... We'll have to continue this conversation late-" Dream's voice was hardly registering to Ranboo's panicked mind that didn't even feel like his own.

Words left his lips. Words he didn't recognize and words he didn't even have a memory of.

Dream's voice froze and slowly Ranboo felt the man lean closer.

" _What was that_?" Dream spoke in syllables that Ranboo didn't recognise but somehow understood, still, the masked man's voice made Ranboo's body want to curl up and phase away. It... the language was... Enderman? No... no, it wasn't... Ranboo sobbed as he coughed up more water that burned his throat and lungs.

He answered Dream... what did he say? He wanted to scream but there was no control anymore. He was living a fuzzy world of lies and dreams and he couldn't do anything! He answered in convoluted words that sounded like a song or a chant and it brought a hum to Dream's lips.

"Interesting," Dream mused in words that were familiar to Ranboo's ears. More words fell out of his lips and Ranboo knew enough to recognize them as some sort of pleas before his head was shoved back underwater. He screeched, his cries coming out in bubbles that drained the air from his lungs. Once the air was gone he tried to keep his lips squeezed shut and tried to weakly fight against the monster's powerful grip. His claws found the edge of the pool and tried to push him up but it was fruitless against Dream's strength.

Breathe. He needed to _breathe_.

His nose rebelled first, letting in a floodgate of burning water that tumbled into Ranboo's lungs and made him sputter and cough... but there was no air to cough. It invited more water into his lungs. Water. Water that burned and stung like the nether as it lapped in his lungs.

He was drowning.

Ranboo tried to scream and beg but his vision was going and he distantly registered his body growing limp. He somewhat noticed how his muscles stopped working altogether, his lungs included...

Then he stopped noticing much of anything as he fell into a cold nothingness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know that meme with Elmo with all of the fire behind him?  
> Me. That's me right now. Just label the fire angst and label Elmo me and BOOM - meme.  
> This is one of my FAVORITE CHAPTERS and I hope y'all liked it! hahahahahaaaaaa~


	17. Where a Life Ends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well... Techno's "oath of peace" didn't work out,  
> Neither did Tommy's nice life,  
> Or Ranboo's peaceful day,  
> Or Quackity's mental state...  
> Yeah, no one's having a good day.  
> "When are you going to stop putting these characters through pain?" you ask.  
> I... have a plan... I swear... but let me write my angst.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I lied, more trigger warnings:  
> TW: gore, forced feeding (it's a potion so I guess drugging could apply here), and uhhhh, oh yeah, heavy angst.

_HaHA Technoblade never DIES BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD LOSERS!! Newbs! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD Nerds! hahaha BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD lol DREAM NO! Philzaaaaa We fly now CARL BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! NO TOMMY! TechNOOOOO BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!_

Techno had cackles on his tongue and adrenaline in his blood. It pounded in his head and filled the edge of his vision with pink but he was elated.

The thrill of the fight and the awe at his recent brush with death was tingling on every surface of his skin and it was _wonderful_. He felt _alive_. The rot that sat festering in his ribcage was being burned away on a pyre as the voices screamed in jubilation and excitement. 

They'd tried to kill him - they'd tried to _kill_ him. Him! _The_ Technoblade! Blood Lord and Blood God; the warrior who never died! They'd tried to kill him! And he had survived.

_Kill! Get em' RIP Tubbo is GONE kill them all. BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD KING! TECHNOBLADE NEVER DIES!_

The colors of the world were so much more brilliant now, sharp and crisp against the tints of pink on the borders of Techno's vision. The call of the fight beckoned him and hummed in the back of his throat like some animal laying in weight for the chance to claw its way out.

His wrist was still firmly held in Philza's hands as he sat dangling from the divine's arms, making their grand escape in the dark of the night. Philza's wings carried them over the hill of L'Manburg with ease until the trees spread out under Techno's feet like carpet.

_Ranboo drowned_

The message rang in Techno's ears for a second but he had no time to reflect on it as a cloud of dust caught his pint-tinted vision. He twisted around and was able to glance a glimmer of diamond horse armor in the moonlight as Quackity took chase on his horse a bit behind them.

_NO RANBOO DREAM YOU BASTA- CAARRRLLLLL carrllll CARL TECHNO HELP CARL RANBOO TOMMY! PHILLL! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD SAVE CARL! Nuuuu RANBOOOO! TOMMY!!_

"We have to hurry!" Philza shouted over the wind.

"Put me down, Phil!" Techno ordered. 

"What!?" Phil's objection hardly registered in Techno's mind. Blood pounded in his ears as his entire body grew warm, tingling in anticipation. His fingers flexed wishing desperately for his sword back - but Ranboo had taken all of that from him. No matter, he'd just have to get creative. He'd kill their pursuer - he'd kill him for what he's done.

"You'll fly faster without me - and I'm not leaving Carl!" Techno yelled. It was a miracle Quackity hadn't slaughtered the horse already - but perhaps he was more foolish than Techno thought. The man seemed... impulsive. He likely had no backup, no one to help him when this all went wonderfully wrong.

Philza, who never questioned Techno's capability or doubted his ability, immediately began lowering altitude until they were low enough for Techno to twist out of Philza's grip and fall to the ground, hitting the dirt and rolling to his feet. He was unarmed, unprotected, and at a disadvanta -

Something tumbled from the sky and hit the grass beside Techno as Philza flew over him again. Two things. Techno looked up through the trees and caught a glimpse of Philza's large dark wings as the survivor raced back northward, through the sky and to the stars. Likely rushing to Tommy, or Ranboo... whatever was happening back home.

Techno looked to the grass where an iron chest plate lay where it had fallen, its edges rough and its sides worn, but the craftsmanship was undeniably Philza - some old armor he must've kept just in case, the survivor's preparation still astounded Techno sometimes. Techno picked up the armor and slipped it over himself, tapping the iron plating and nodding as the voices cheered on. They knew what this meant. They knew what would come.

Techno looked down at the second thing Philza had dropped and sighed. He picked up the sharp netherite pickaxe, probably the only other weapon Philza had handy - okay maybe he wasn't as prepared as Techno gave him credit for, who packs armor but no sword? He sighed, bouncing the mining tool in his palms and testing its balance. It wasn't terrible, but it was heavy on it's end - like an ax, though perhaps a bit lighter. He'd have more time to recover from a faulty blow than he would with an ax but it wouldn't do nearly as much damage. He'd need to be precise, clever, and have good aim to do any real damage... It would be a challenge.

A smile came over Techno's face as he slipped his hand into the folds of his clothes and felt the stowed away potions he'd been keeping in the hopes that this would happen. He pulled them out and held the three potions between his fingers as he studied their colors. Strength, Speed, and Regeneration. The colors danced in the bottles and in his mind alongside the voices.

Strength to rip and tear, speed to dance and dodge, regeneration to cease all hesitation and be fearless, allow for mistakes and destroy the other before they had the time to adjust. The voices were feral now, screaming and banging on the bars of their imprisonment, shaking Techno's skull as he gripped the pickaxe in hand and chuckled darkly.

"You ready, chatter?" Techno asked softly. Oh, were they ever.

The sound of hooves interrupted whatever cacophony the chatter tried to scream back at him. Techno looked up as Quackity charged in, ax at the ready as he drove Carl right for him. That magnificent horse let out a startled whinny as he recognized his old master and immediately veered off course, leaving Quackity leaning foolishly off balance as he released a vicious swing for Techno's neck.

Techno felt his tusks push his lips into a smile as he swayed away from the blade and watched as Carl, that beautiful wonderful beast, rose into a rear and let out that familiar horse-like scream of anger and rebellion. Quackity swore and struggle to regain control of the reins but Techno was already charging in, his pickax swinging for Quackity's side (careful to avoid that gleaming diamond hide that Carl sat underneath).

Quackity twisted out of the way, his body sliding out of the saddle as Carl cantered and bucked, leaving the Vice President crashing into the grassy floor and rolling out of the way of Techno's next blow that sunk into the skin of the earth and nearly threatened to pierce his ribs.

Carl proudly nickered and pranced a few meters away, shaking his mane and snorting as he left his master to the fight. A few of the voices cooed at the horse, but it wasn't anything warm, not like they had cooed at Tommy's laughter, they cooed at that wonderful intelligent horse who'd led them a little lamb just perfect for the slaughter. All of them were dark now, poisoned and thick in Techno's mind as they laughed and shrieked in sadistic excitement. They smelled it now - the blood, Techno could too. He smelled the fear on Quackity's shoulders and knew that under all that fear and armor was thick red crimson - lifeblood and energy that would soon spill onto the grass...

Oh, it would be easy.

"You _fucker_!" Quackity yelled as he scrambled to his feet and took a blind attack at Techno with that foolish ax. Techno cackled as the voices tore the foe in front of him apart in a million different ways. Such blind rage, terrible form, blind blows, and a laughable defense - this was their Vice President? Techno raised his pickax and let it fly - unbalanced and awkward, it swung like a scythe and Techno's enemy had to scramble back like a panicked little mouse to avoid it. 

Weak. Techno growled as he watched Quackity's feet fall over one another in his mad scramble to back away. There was no finesse, no skill. They'd given an ax to a lamb that was dressed in lion's clothing. That was fine, Techno had no issue slaughtering lambs. He could take Quackity from the side, feint him from the left and strike right, lodge his pickaxe right between his ribs, slip the point into his heart, and make the lamb fall with a sorry little bleat, a quick and easy death.

"How - how does Philza have his wings!?" Quackity demanded.

No - no Lamb was the wrong word for this foe. He was too loud, too arrogant. His tongue was quick - his call was loud. Techno hummed as the voices surged in his brain. He could come from above, leave his own ribs open for an attack as he stuck his pick in Quackity's sharp mind just like how the man had wanted Techno's head to be crushed under an anvil. It would be quick - it would be bloody... and there would be poetic justice in that.

The voices liked that. They laughed and screamed as they danced with the thought of Quackity's blood and brains on the grass... but they couldn't be satisfied so easily. Headwounds were fine and all - plenty of blood for the voices, but they could be so quick, so easy. These people thought they could kill Technoblade! They thought they could hurt Phil. They thought they could do this to him without punishment, without consequence. They would have to learn, Techno would make them learn. They needed to pay, there needed to be retribution _painted all pretty in blood and screams so that they never mess with us again for they made a grave error trying to wrong us so we'll tear everything they want apart because they messed with you our Blood Lord and so we will feast on them happily_.

"Fine, don't fucking tell me," Quackity growled as he raised his ax and changed his messy stance into something at least slightly acceptable. He'd be off-balance when he lunged through, kiltering right... his left side would be wide open... Techno could try to go for the ribs... or the legs.

Oh, the chatter loved that idea. They shook, vibrated almost at the thought of crippling this poor little foe. Oh, he'd bleed and he'd crawl and they'd just love that - the way his blood would leave little trails in the grass as they debated on how to finish it. Techno could make it slow, make it memorable, yes, yes the voices liked that idea a lot. The thought left a sour taste in Techno's mouth. He hated when they got like this.

He'd go for the ribs.

"How the _hell_ did Philza get you out of that - how the _hell_ did he get his wings!? Was it Dream!? Did the fucker play both sides again!?" Quackity demanded.

The man didn't realize the danger he was in, he didn't hear Techno's voices screaming all the terrible and wonderful ways Techno could kill him. He didn't see the red building on Techno's vision. He was ignorant and the voices loved it; such easy prey.

"Did you really think, Quackity, that you could kill me that easily?" Techno taunted. Oh, it felt wonderful to taunt. The power of worlds and eons lay in his hands and he could bring it all down on this little fool. Why had he left this behind? Why had he pushed this feeling away? The fight, the banter, the energy - it was his lifeblood. It was his birthright. Why had he left this? The chatter wrapped him in a warm cape of velvet and crimson, dawning him with the oath he'd taken so long ago as they whispered their support and crowned him their king. This was what he was meant to be.

No - _no_. Techno felt the rot curling up in his chest again and he felt sick. He'd left this because it left him sick - it made him a monster...

_"You're not a monster, mate. You're just a kid."_

He wanted to be - he _wanted_ for that to be true... he wanted it so badly. But no matter what Philza said... no matter what Techno did... no matter how hard he tried, the universe always pulled him right back here. It forced him here, with a weapon in hand and an arena around him, an arena of trees or bricks made no difference. It forced him here with a permanent audience screaming his name and he was a beast who couldn't refuse the trumpets of the colosseum.

But... but he'd tried... he'd _tried_. Techno felt despair and anger growl at the voices in his head as they tried to mourn the peaceful life lost. He'd... he'd tried...

Whatever useless tightness in his chest was there, holding him down, suddenly was washed away by a surge of angry voices when Quackity opened his mouth again.

"How - how - how the fuck" Quackity hissed.

"You think death will stop me?" Techno laughed, swallowing whatever lump was forming in his throat. "Even if you killed me - do you think it would stop me? You know what - you know what! I have a lot to say! I was going to say it at the trial but apparently, that wasn't going to happen! You know - I tried to convince you guys that government was not the answer - that it was the cause of all of your problems! I fought alongside you as a brother! But - but it didn't matter! You cast me aside - You _used_ me! When I tried to use force, you formed a government, and when I accepted your stupidity and went into hiding - when I retired, when I swore off violence - you hunted me down! You hurt my friends."

"You don't understand, Techno," Quackity growled darkly. There was something predator-like in his gaze which made Techno feel excitement race up his spine. A fight, a _fight_. Yes, yes he wanted it - the voices wanted it, he wanted it, they wanted it! "You don't understand what we're trying to build here, Techno."

"You're trying to build your own power," Techno growled, a smile on his lips. This young mortal would never know true power, only the falsity that governments promised, the false power they thought came with the shackles of 'unity' and corruption.

"This is not a simple 'anarchy' thing, Techno!" Quackity smiled. "You just don't understand. Do you really think I give a shit about the Withers?! I don't care about the Withers - I don't give a fuck about what you did. But you are a threat to everything we're building, so you're on the list. You're on the hit list."

"What hitlist?" Techno asked, curiosity spiking. Were there others? Who else was worthy enough to be 'gifted' an execution - other anarchists? Were they powerful - who could hold a candle to Techno's ability?

"I'm building a country back there," Quackity growled. "And what it needs is organization and power. So I don't care how long it fucking takes me, or what I have to do to get it - but I'm going to kill you Technoblade. I'm going to fucking kill you."

"You had your chance, you still had Carl, you had me on the ground, you had Philza leaving me, you could've just threatened me and marched me all the way back to L'Manburg," Techno taunted. "But you move too fast and you don't plan."

"I'm going to kill you," Quackity repeated. His arms were shaking as he clenched his ax and Techno felt the voices cackle. Easy fight... but it would be a fight nonetheless. There was a spirit in Quackity's eyes - spirit and anger... and rage. Techno felt adrenaline in his heart as he took in the excitement of the fight, it was always entertaining when they fought with rage.

"I just have one question, Quackity," he asked softly. There was blood in his eyes, there was fire on his feet, the rot in his chest was burned away and he was as he was always meant to be. The Blood Lord, with blood of gold and spirit of steel. He was made to kill and fight - he'd pushed away his nature and he was a fool for doing so. This was where he was meant to be.

"What do you have?" Quackity asked. He wasn't a lamb... but he wasn't a lion. He was... he was a snake... yes. Yes, a snake easily crushed under a heel but with just enough bite to make Techno feel the exhilaration he'd grown high on. 

"Do you really think that you're enough to kill me?" Techno laughed taking a menacing step forward. Quackity didn't retreat backward this time... intriguing. "Even unarmed, in iron armor?" Techno continued. "Do you really think _you_ can take me?"

"Oh, I'll do it," Quackity growled. Confidence or arrogance? Techno couldn't tell. The voices hissed as they regarded the snake and screamed for Techno to go for the head, maybe the neck if he was lucky. Silence the snake and all his sweet tongue, drown him in his own blood - that would be plenty memorable for him.

"Do you really think so?" Techno raised his pickaxe and watched as the fear in Quackity's eyes set fire to something else... something rageful and... and oh so foolish.

"Let's fucking find out you son of a bitch!" Quackity yelled as he charged.

Techno raised the potion bottles he'd kept a steady hand on and slammed them into the ground beneath him. Brilliant colors of purples, pinks, and reds danced at his feet and filled his chest. His eyesight grew a beautiful scarlet red focused solely of Quackity as he came at him, ax at the ready.

The voices screamed in jubilation and Techno danced.

So familiar was this exchange of blows Techno could do it with his eyes closed. Dodge the ax, dance around the enemy, bring his weapon down on the skin, listen to the screams. His footwork was second nature - left, right, shuffle step, left again, shift right to duck, bend the knees when you lunge, shuffle back, repeat, invert if necessary. His pickaxe dug into dark armor, cracking it and brushing against the skin like the gentle caress of a cat's claw.

There was golden blood on Quackity's ax but Techno felt no pain - scarlet blood glittered on Quackity's face and the voices reached out to touch it, they wanted to taste it.

Quackity screamed insults. He was wild, emotional... vulnerable. Techno watched his footwork, how it stumbled over itself like an animal half-delusional who can't decide whether to fight to flee. He watched Quackity's ax fall heavy in his hands, how it took all of the snake's strength to pull it back up. He watched Quackity's skin tighten and control as the shifter's many forms threatened to emerge. He could shift into anything, but nothing would save him.

Even if Techno was being foolishly reckless, Quackity couldn't withstand him.

And Techno was being reckless... he recognized his own foolishness, he was leaning into his blows, anger making his swings too wild - too uncontrollable. He growled as the voices clawed at his skull.

These people hunted him down. These people hurt Phil! These people would never stop. These people would pay!

Quackity's useless jeers were lost on Techno as he ignored the man's tongue and found his target. This foe talked too much. He could change that.

Not the ribs - too quick a death. Not the legs, too slow a death for his liking. Not the chest or the back or the stomach. No... no, this pickaxe would go into the snake's head and silence that tongue of his. But not in the way the voices had proposed.

At his plan the voices quieted - they watched in wonder and anticipation as Techno closed the distance between him and his foe. They chanted, banging their fists on his skull in rhythm and growing again in volume as they watched him set the snare that would snap Quackity's neck.

"I have a pickaxe!" Techno threatened, a snarl on his lips, "AND I'LL PUT IT THROUGH YOUR TEETH!"

Quackity retorted with some insult... his words lost to Techno as the pig hybrid knocked that foolish little ax blow away. He danced closer... closer. He danced until he could smell that coppery twang of blood from Quackity's wounds and watched those eyes of his foe dance in terror.

Terror that came too late.

The pickaxe was already flying upwards, an upper slice was difficult, and left Techno foolishly open, but Quackity didn't know that. He didn't know that had he shifted his own foot a little to the left he could've dodged the blow and caught Techno by the ribs with his pretty diamond ax. He didn't know that his death was purposelessly extravagant or that Techno hands shook as blood sprayed all over them. He didn't know much of anything as that pointed tip slammed under his jaw, curled through the floor of his mouth, and pierced the tongue that lay there.

But Techno knew. 

He knew pain and blood and screams and joy and agony... and fear and self-loathing covered up by layers and layers of joy and sick euphoria that had the rot in his chest blooming.

So he laughed.

He laughed as he ripped his pickaxe free like his foe was nothing other than a piece of coal ore that he'd gotten his pick stuck in. Blood pooled on the ground as panicked-not-quite-dead eyes met Techno's own, and the voices celebrated... they celebrated and chanted.

Chanted and chanted and chanted.

~~~

Ranboo awoke screaming.

His throat was still hoarse and for a moment of absolute panic, he thought he could feel the water in his chest, burning him alive from the inside out to try and claim his life again.

He was suffocating again, he couldn't _breathe_.

Something licked his face making Ranboo curl up and swallow a startled enderman-like screech before he realized who it was. It was his dog. His fluffy, kind little (okay, it wasn't really that little) dog was on his bed and licking his face with a wagging tail and a terrible breath.

Ranboo sobbed and reached out desperately, wrapped his claws in that thick fur and pulling the hound closer, burying his face into that thick fur and sobbing as his entire body shook. He'd died... he'd _died_. And it hadn't been a meaningless death, it wasn't something he could laugh off and know that it hadn't counted - that one had meant something. It had meant fear and terror and... hopelessness. Ranboo choked and held his dog closer.

He still had the ghost of a hand wrapped around the back of his neck and the air he breathed in was heavy and terrible, like water.

He'd died...

How had he died?

Water. He had died to water.

Why did he do that, he hated water?

Dream.

What did Dream do?

Ranboo felt his chest grow cold as he found he didn't know the answer. He couldn't remember. No - no he couldn't forget that! No! He jumped out of his bed and raced down the ladder, leaving his dog looking after him puzzledly.

How had he died!? How!!? Who killed him!?

Dream - Dream it had to be Dream, it _must've_ been Dream. But he wasn't sure. Ranboo felt tears in the corners of his eyes and he held back the next sob. 

Why -

Tommy. Oh... no - oh no. No - no!

Memories came like a flood, like the water that had drowned him not a moment ago. He was supposed to protect Tommy - he was supposed to... to...

He'd failed. Dream had beaten him. Those memories were foggy, distant, dream-like almost. He remembered fighting, and how much fear he'd been in... he remembered how cold the stone had felt under his hands, he remembered a voice in his ear saying... something... what had he said? 

There was a hand holding the back of his neck and he remembered water, choking his throat and filling his lungs.

He'd failed.

Ranboo threw the door of his house open and ran into the square, pausing as he took in the scene.

The anvil had fallen. The cage had crumbled under the heavy weight... oh no... no... no, Techno.

"Ranboo! Where have you been!?" Fundy's voice startled Ranboo as the fox hybrid ran over and put his paws on Ranboo's shoulders. The man was in his fox form with fear and anger in his eyes.

"I... I..." Ranboo's throat was hoarse... it was strangely dry but Ranboo wasn't going to take a drink of water for anything in the world. "I died."

"What happened? You forget how to swim?" Fundy asked with a smirk. When Ranboo didn't laugh, Fundy's ear perked up and his hold on Ranboo's shoulders tightened. "What happened?"

"I..." Ranboo managed.

"Was it a life - did you just lose a life? " Fundy's voice was thick with concern and fear as he tried to catch Ranboo's eyes. Ranboo couldn't look up - how could he? Techno was dead - Dream was going to get Tommy - Phil was...

Wait...

"Where's Phil?" Ranboo rasped as he looked to the open window of Phil's window where a familiar apparition sat. Fundy's ears drooped as the hybrid looked back.

Ghostbur looked over with a smile on his face... but there was something off with it. Something darker.

"Oh! Phil flew off with Techno!" Ghostbur laughed as he floated up for a moment before he settled on Phil's windowsill. "Quackity ran after them. Tubbo's in his house - he seemed rather upset."

"Techno's alive!?" Ranboo demanded, making the mistake of looking Fundy in the eyes.

Oh, dear. Ranboo felt frozen... exposed... he felt like those soft eyes saw through every part of his monochromatic body and knew just what he'd done. It was violating and humiliating in every way but Fundy didn't even blink as his head tilted.

"Ranboo... what's going on? Are you alright?" Fundy pleaded.

"Which way did Techno and Phil go!?" Ranboo begged.

"Why!?"

"Please! Fundy!" Ranboo was nearly hysterical now. He needed to tell Techno and Philza he failed - they needed to get home. They needed to get to Tommy. Gods - Tommy! Dream was going to get Tommy!!

"That way," Fundy murmured finally, breaking eye-contact and solemnly pointing northward. "Why - what is going on?"

"Thank you, Fundy," Ranboo breathed as he tore himself away, still shaking from the eye contact, still struggling to find his breath like there was still water there. He scrambled over the wooden streets of L'Manburg and ran as fast as his long legs could carry him, just barely registering Fundy calling after him. Something about how there was weather moving in and it was going to rain soon.

None of it mattered - none of it!

He had to get back! He had to get back!!

Tommy... Tommy was in trouble!

~~~

Tommy cursed as his foot caught on a stupid fucking rock that had chosen this wonderful moment to send him sprawling in the fucking snow. He coughed and cursed as he forced himself to stand and wipe the snow out of his face.

The wind was howling, drowning out Tommy's own thoughts and stinging his cheeks with its cold bite. It felt like thousands of little daggers were poking at his cheeks, his fingertips, and his nose. His muscles ached and screamed as he forced them to stand again.

The house was far behind him now, its warm glow lost completely in this white-out. A huge tundra sprawled out before Tommy, at least he assumed it sprawled but it was nearly impossible to tell with the snow whirling around him, freezing his eyes and hindering his sight.

At least Dream probably couldn't fucking see either. Or maybe he didn't need to see with that stupid mask. Well fuck.

He cursed again as he tripped once more. His face collided with the snow and he felt his own fear and anger build into a frustrated scream. He punched the snowdrift he'd fallen in and lay still for a moment, finally realizing that he was still crying... still crying like a fucking baby.

He was fucking scared - alright!? He'd admit it. He didn't know where he was going, hell he didn't know where he was and he was... fuck, he was scared. It was a pit in his stomach that was chewing him up. Dream could be anywhere - he could be notching an arrow right now to kill him. Tommy curled up around himself at the thought and wished... he wished he could just stay like this... safe in this fucking cold snowdrift. He was tired... so fucking tired. He didn't want to run or cry, he wanted to curl up in bed listening to Philza read one of his shit books aloud and pretend that he was fine and okay and he wasn't fucked up and this wasn't happening and...

Fuck... fuck he wanted to just stay like this. It was cold as hell but his skin was beginning to numb, he'd stop feeling much of anything soon... he could... he could just...

No - NO he couldn't - he couldn't let himself fucking freeze out here! There were monsters and god knows what else, probably polar bears or some shit.

He pushed himself up and stumbled forward again, no longer running, but trudging along, holding himself as he shivered, his legs wading through the quickly building snow.

He needed to get away... he needed to get away...

It hurt, everything hurt. The wind hurt, the snow hurt, his legs hurt, his throat hurt, his nose didn't hurt but that was because he couldn't fucking feel it. He felt tired as hell and promised himself that the literal first cave he came across was going to become his temporary hidey-hole. He trudged along, avoiding the monsters he barely made out in the darkness and praying he wasn't going in circles.

When spruce trees rose up ahead of him in the night, Tommy rejoiced. He forced his aching muscles to break into a run - that was a mistake.

He tripped within the first few seconds and went sprawling. He didn't even curse this time, just balled up a bit of snow in his fist and grit his teeth and he forced himself to his hands and knees again, his long-ish hair blowing wildly in the roaring wind. Philza never did cut it, like Tommy asked him to.

He's not sure what prompted it, but a chill went up through his spine down to his toes that he could just barely feel. He thought it could be the wind or his own fear, but either way, it made him look back.

He shouldn't have done that.

The bleached mask watched him passively, it's sick smile staying perfectly stationary as its master. 

Dream was just _standing_ there, a few feet back. Standing there. Fucking watching him. Tommy felt his heart jump into his throat as he jumped to his feet and backed away.

How... how... how fucking long had Dream been behind him? How... What the fuck!?

"I was wondering when you'd notice me," Dream's little chuckle pierced through the roaring wind and made Tommy feel like he was a block of ice, he was just a statue with frozen lips and a terrified frantic heart.

"How... how fucking long have you - " Tommy began. Oh shit, was that his voice? That was fucking pitiful! It cracked and everything like he was some little kid.

"A while," Dream shrugged taking a slow step forward. Tommy took an uncertain step back. He was nearly at the tree line... maybe he could lose the fucker in the forest.

"Tommy," Dream's gentle scolding nearly chased that thought away. "I need you to come home now."

"Fuck off!" Tommy yelled over the wind, taking another step back as Dream took a mirrored step forward. Dream's hands were in the folds of his cloak, and Tommy thought he saw blood on the bastard's shoulders. Ha, maybe that was from Ranboo... shit, Ranboo. "What happened to Ranboo!?"

"Didn't you hear the message?" Dream chimed. "He drowned."

"I know it was you, bitch," Tommy scowled. "You fucking killed him you... you psychopath."

Dream came ever closer and Tommy felt his chest grow tight. "Maybe, but that's what happens when people don't listen. Are you going to listen, Tommy?"

That little fucker of a voice was clinging to Tommy's leg, begging him to do what the masked bastard said. Begging him to listen. Tommy hated that he was tempted to listen - listening hurt less.

"No," he tried to sound sure but his voice shook and he hated himself for it. "No - I'm not going back there!"

The beach, the sand, the sky, all of it so big and so fucking lonely... only Dream there. Dream with his fucking warm arms and soft voice that lied - it had to be a lie - and that feeling of drowning with Dream's stupid strings around his neck.

"Come on Tommy, don't - don't start to be difficult," Dream instructed.

"No! Fuck off! I'm not going back there! I'm not - I'm not just going to let you - let you _watch_ me! Let you hurt me! Fuck off! Go away!!"

"Tommy," Dream's voice was sharper now, he was getting impatient. Tommy had to force himself to continue to stand even when his mind begged him to listen, to fucking _apologize_.

"NO!" Tommy broke away and sprinted. He ran as fast he could into the tree line, vaulting over fallen trees and stumbling from hidden rocks and branches. He didn't know where Dream was or how far behind him the hunter was, but he couldn't check - he just had to run. He just had to run - get away - escape... He had to try and hold out until someone, _anyone_ found him... Phil or Techno or...

They had to show up - they had to come for him...

There were tears in his eyes again and he couldn't fucking see where he was going! His heart was blocking out any sound to clue him in on where Dream was. His whole body was just useless, it did nothing to warn him about the predator that raced in the trees above him, descending down on him like a bird of prey until there were feet crashing into Tommy's back, pinning him to the ground as that terrible fucking honey voice wormed into his ear.

"That wasn't good listening, Tommy," Dream scolded as Tommy writhed and scream under him as Dream's knee dug into his back and kept him pinned in the snow.

"You - You FUCKER!" Tommy screamed... he choked on a sob and tried to crawl away as the masked bastard pinned him to the snowy ground, one hand grabbing Tommy's should to keep him still. Tommy distantly heard the sound of a knife being drawn before red hot pain laced up his calf and he screamed.

"No more running," Dream... he was happy. He was goddamn happy and Tommy had just been stabbed in his fucking leg. Tommy was drowning in fear and anger and whatever other useless shit was bouncing around in his head.

"PHIL!" he screamed to the wind, sobbing and cursing as he grabbed two fist-fulls of snow and tried to scream again... for Phil, Techno, anyone... god, _anyone_. Dream grabbed the back of his head and shoved it into the snow that bit into Tommy's skin.

"Shh, no one's coming for you, Tommy," Dream cooed. "There's no one coming to save you, and there's no one who can help you, so stop struggling and start listening."

The words were knives to Tommy's heart and he couldn't help but start sobbing, even with his face covered with fucking freezing snow.

"I hate you," Tommy sobbed as Dream released his head and removed his weight from the boy. Tommy tried to push himself up, biting down on his knuckles as pain laced up his bleeding leg.

"You really shouldn't, I'm trying to help you," Dream's distant voice sighed. Tommy pushed himself up in a sitting position and looked around for the masked man, finding him with a shovel in hand and a shallow hole in the ground.

"No..." Tommy's voice was weak but his chest was a strong vice around his heart.

"Yes, Tommy, put your armor in the hole. You won't need it where we're going," Dream ordered.

Tommy put a hand on his dark armor... the armor Tech had made for him. No... no, no.

"No... No! I won't!!" Tommy objected. Fuck, he sounded like a little kid throwing a tantrum. He sounded like he was five again yelling at Wilbur as he tried to tell him to clean up the house.

"Tommy," Dream's sharp voice carved through Tommy's thoughts and made him tremble as the boy held his bleeding leg. "Put your armor in the hole, now."

Tommy felt large thick tears fall down his face as he cried like a fucking baby... but he couldn't stop them. He couldn't stop anything. He couldn't do anything! He hated it - he hated it!!

"Now, Tommy," Dream ordered.

Slowly, Tommy's hands seemed to act on their own accord as they went through the familiar motions of unstrapping armor and pulling it off. He bit back a whimper as he pulled off his leg-guards, Dream's stab wound throbbing with every movement of his leg.

Dream walked over and picked up the pile of black armor, dropping it in the hole unceremoniously. Tommy bit back a curse - Techno had worked for fucking hours on that armor and Dream was treating it like trash. Dream came back for Tommy, nearly making him scramble backward. Fuck he wanted to run, he wanted to scramble away and scream but his leg hurt and he was fucking freezing now and... and he had nowhere to go. Dream lifted him up like he was light as a feather, supporting him with one arm as he dragged him over to the hole.

"Dream?" Tommy asked fearfully.

"All of your stuff, Tommy," Dream ordered as he dropped Tommy right next to the edge of the shallow hole. "Everything. Right now."

"No... Come on, please Dream - I - I don't have that much!" Tommy pleaded.

"Now."

Tommy shakily reached into his space pocket and disposed of his inventory. The golden apples and iron tools. Stone and dirt. Everything. When he was done he couldn't fucking bear to look in the hole and forced himself to look away. He wasn't going to look at Dream either.

But the bastard didn't seem to be done. He crouched down beside Tommy and grabbed his chin, forced him to look at that bleached mask. He tilted Tommy's head like he was something to study and Tommy bit down on his tongue to swallow a mouthful of insults. Dream finally released him, only for his fingers to drift upwards to the emerald earring on Tommy's lobe. Tommy jerked away but Dream was faster, his fingers catching the earring and keeping Tommy there by default.

Fuck... fuck he was going to take his earring - fucking shit - he was going to rip it out. Tommy forced himself to swallow a whimper at the thought.

"Don't Dream - " Tommy hated how he begged. He was pleading to this motherfucking sick psycho and he... god, he hated it.

"Ranboo had something similar," Dream hummed, his head tilting a bit as he studied the jewel. "Some sort of family crest, how cute."

"Dream... please..." Tommy pleas went noticed - but at least the bastard didn't rip it out. Dream's hand carefully pulled the back off the earring, dropping it somewhere in the snow before pulling the emerald stud out and holding it between two fingers.

"Give it BACK!" Tommy yelled desperately as he tried to reach for it. Dream held it out of reach before quickly dropping into the hole where it clattered off the slight snow-covered armor and disappeared in the dirt. 

"You don't need it anymore," Dream assured him as he reached back down for Tommy. Tommy had been staring at the hole that had been quickly filling with snow, partly shocked that he'd lost Phil's earing but that shock quickly turned to rage as Dream moved to pick him up.

He kicked and screamed as those callused hands tried to take him. He wouldn't fucking go. He wouldn't _fucking_ go!! He writhed and twisted like an eel in Dream's grip, thrashing and cursing in all the ways he could as he gave it the best fight he could manage. He screamed for Phil. He screamed for Techno. He screamed for Ranboo, for Tubbo... for Wilbur.

Finally, Dream threw him into the ground and pulled out a grey potion from the folds of his cloak, locating around Tommy until he could force the boy to be still in a sitting position and hold the potion to his lips.

" _Drink_." The order was colder than the freezing storm they were in and Tommy refused to listen. He clenched his jaw and fruitlessly clawed at Dream's hold as those strong hands moved up to his jaw and forced it open. He thrashed and writhed, crying and sobbing as he silently begged for someone to come... someone...

The liquid that touched his tongue was rotten. Some twisted take on mushroom stew, sickly sweet to start off with a bitter, sickening after taste. He hated it. He tried to spit it out but its presence made all of his actions weak, feeble. He felt helpless and he screamed in hopelessness before all of the liquid trickled down his throat. 

Finally, Dream released him and Tommy scrambled away, trying to throw up whatever the hell he just ingested. He retched and shook his head as his vision fogged.

"Let's try this again," Dream's distant commentary made Tommy's organs twist as those hands once again wrapped around him and lifted him off the ground - like he was some child. He tried to twist, tried to fight, but his entire body felt like it weighed hundreds of pounds. He weakly pounded against Dream's chest as he sobbed and tried to escape the gentle hold of the elder.

"I hate you!" Tommy screamed weakly. "I hate you! I hate you! I _hate_ you!" He broke into sobs as he realized that he couldn't fight it off, couldn't escape.

"I know," Dream's gentle voice soothed. "But you'll learn."

~~~

Quackity was in agony. His jaw was burning and aching and throbbing - probably due to the hole in it. He wanted to scream, cry... sob even. He couldn't. He was drowning in his own blood and his vision was fading.

He was dying and the last thing he was going to fucking see was that bastard Technoblade smiling down at him - the sadist!

The pain was starting to fade... his heart was starting slow. Disappointment and despair clung to every part of Quackity's mind as he realized he failed. They didn't... they didn't kill Technoblade- he didn't kill Technoblade. The monster would live another day - terrorize another person, he'd always be that shadowed threat that was going to tear down everything Quackity wanted to protect.

Why? WHY!? Why did the fucking universe allow this!? Why was it fair that Techno got to live while Quackity was left here with a hole in both the floor and the roof of his mouth? Why!?

It should have worked! It should have worked. How did Philza get his wings!? How did Techno still win!? How did they fail!??

There were two hearts in him and both were slowing as he felt the pain decrease even more. There was alcohol in the air and arms around his chest as he lay on the grass.

_"Can't even do this right, can you Quackity?"_

Schlatt's voice was in his ear, rough and tumble like river stones in rapids. Quackity's eyes flickered close with the taste of alcohol and blood - so much blood - on his tongue.

"Techno!" 

That... that was a familiar voice. Quackity's eyes flickered open for a moment longer, hope making him cling to life just a moment more. Techno was walking up to his stupid horse and there was a familiar tall figure beside him. Their voice carried but their words hardly registered. Quackity narrowed his eyes as something in the back of his mind told him that figure was familiar.

Finally, finally, the second person looked back at him and Quackity felt rage fill every part of him.

Ranboo...

 _Ranboo_...

He... He betrayed them! He was talking to Techno, Techno was listening! He - he was _with_ Techno. The two got on the same horse! The two rode away together! The... the two...

Tears filled Quackity's eyes as he lay there in agony. God, he wanted to die... he just wanted to die. It hurt... it hurt so much. He coughed pitifully as his lungs filled with blood and weakly tried to put a hand to the giant hole in the bottom of his mouth.

It hurt... He was going to die... he wanted to die... he didn't want to die... he... he...

It hurt... Ranboo betrayed them. Ranboo was working with them! Quackity tried to sob, but that hurt even more.

There were strong arms wrapping around him and a ram's horn pressing into the side of his head as someone breathed into his ear.

_"Everyone betrays us in the end."_

Quackity felt tears slip down his face as the pain finally disappeared and his eyes closed.

It was dark...

It was always dark... and he was alone...

A second heart beat in his stomach and he felt sick. He was never alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *watching Philza's birthday stream and sees Tommy stream*  
> Oh! Cool!  
> *watches Tommy fucking die*  
> Oh... shit...
> 
> So, my guys, how we feeling? Can you tell I cope with my emotions but putting fictional characters through emotional turmoil?


	18. Bloodied Wings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dream is back to manipulating - except he believes himself. The fool.  
> *A challenger approaches*  
> Dream goes and pulls an uno reverse on Philza

Dream was gentle when Tommy finally fell asleep in his arms. He kept his feet light so they barely sunk into the heavy snow, carefully placed to not wake the blond. When the wind picked up and bit at the boy's skin, Dream debated killing the storm, if just to grant them some respite, but eventually decided to simply let it rage and cover his tracks. Instead, he paused for a brief moment to undo the clasps on his cloak and drape it around Tommy. The boy already looked on the border of frostbitten, and it would be most unpleasant to have to find a way to re-grow limbs, not to mention it would likely be painful for the child.

Dream's mask turned towards the wind as he gently lay Tommy's head on his chest and pressed forward. It was so pleasant when Tommy was like this; quiet and gentle. Dream hummed to himself as the winter's chill made Tommy shiver and curl into his arms. The boy muttered something in his drugged state and Dream chuckled to hear a curse word somewhere in all those mumbles. Alright, maybe he was growing partial to the boy's quick spirited tongue.

He almost wished he could still feel excited. So many pieces had fallen into place beautifully, better than he could've hoped. He'd entrapped Phil, he'd given Tubbo his terrorist to execute (albeit the young president had failed in that regard, but oh well, that's life), and he had gotten his Tommy back. 

Well... what remained of his Tommy. The world was lucky Dream was patient or else he would've simply killed Phil for rebuilding Tommy back into his destructive abrasive self. The boy was self-destructive now - he could've died out in this storm just to spite Dream, which could've been a terrible waste. That spirit of his was so powerful, so vibrant, and he wasted it on abhorrent impatience and arrogance. It was pitiful and so terribly dangerous without a hand to guide it.

Dream held Tommy a bit closer as the boy mumbled something again. He was such a promising boy. So much potential pressed into one poor misled child. He needed structure, he needed support, and nothing like what Philza "offered". Philza was loose in everything, a man who believed in free-range, absolutely wild children, only ever caring when he had to patch up wounds. That's all Philza was good for, slapping a bandage on and pretending it was all alright.

Dream wouldn't do that to Tommy. He'd mold Tommy, shape him, give him all the attention and energy that the boy _needed_. Tommy would grow, he'd learn and adapt to Dream's hands. He was a beautiful little falcon who needed to learn his commands - he couldn't be left to the wild like some wild predator, subject to nature. Dream would train him - he'd teach him. and together, they were going to do beautiful, absolutely _wonderful_ things.

"Isn't that right, Tommy?" Dream asked gently to the boy still drugged in his arms.

Tommy stirred at his name and those dim blue eyes foggily opened and drearily blinked at him. Confusion danced in those eyes, and then maybe fear. Some strained sound left Tommy's lips and Dream only held him closer as he felt the boy's meager attempts at a push against his chest. He smiled - oh, the boy was so stubborn, so spirited... he'd thrive once all of that was channeled towards something useful. 

"Shhh, sleep," Dream instructed gently as he kept his eyes forward and lightly walked onward. Tommy's struggles only lasted a moment or two more before they melted away again and the boy slipped into his delusional state. He'd need another dose of weakness potions in thirty minutes or so but it would be easy to get the boy to drink it when he was like this...

What wouldn't be easy was dealing with their obnoxious, eventual tail - because, for as wonderful as the situation was, there would always be downsides. Downsides like Techno failing to lose a life, but that wasn't too surprising. Downsides like Ranboo stabbing Dream - though that was almost impressive if Dream was being honest, he should seriously consider having an actual conversation with the hybrid one of these days that involved fewer blades and more mind games, Ranboo could prove to be useful yet. But he digressed - the final downside was Philza (always Philza) who was trying to chase them down like the foolish mother-bird he was.

Dream clenched Tommy's figure in his arms a little tighter as a rare flare of anger burned in his chest for a moment. He knew the divine being was somewhere behind him, discombobulated in the storm, but Dream doubted he would be able to evade the sharp eyes of Philza for long - and he really didn't desire an arrow in the back.

The next step he took sent shockwaves out through the world beneath his feet, small ones that echoed through the earth and came back to him, displaying a wonderful little map of the world beneath and around him, that otherwise was shrouded in the curtain of the blizzard. With a small smile, Dream veered off course, ducking under spruces trees heavy with snow until he came upon a small little icy mouth of a cave. Slipping inside Dream perused its perimeter and smiled. It was a dead-end, a small little tunnel that was freezing and made Tommy's breath dance around his head like a small cloud from where he lay in Dream's arms.

It would suffice.

Dream gently lay Tommy on the freezing stone and wrapped his cloak around the boy further, bundling him in that thick cloth of forest green, noting his flinches and how viciously he was shivering. There were frost crystals on Tommy's eyelashes and his lips were blue and chapped. Dream gently studied the boy's fingers and skin, noting the chemical burns from the harming potion he'd splashed them both with (that had been surprising and clever - also lucky but Dream wasn't going to bash the boy's success). He mostly checked for any signs of frostbite on the boy's pale skin. Luckily, it seems all that heavy fur-lined clothing served him well. A few logs and a spark later there was a small fire in the cave, the smoke drifting upwards and out the mouth of the cave so as to not suffocate them with it's ashen air. Dream looked up from the small blaze and saw Tommy's eyes opening, staring at the open flame with a foggy sort of expression, wonder and fear danced with those flames and Dream was content to watch the boy's eyes for a few moments longer.

Eventually, Dream's eyes wandered over the boy's pale face, running along his somewhat stronger build and sturdier figure before eventually resting on the small trickle of blood still hidden on the boy's calf that was leaking on the stone. He hummed non-committally as he pulled his knife out of its sheath and slipped it into the coals, its handle far enough from the fire for Dream to grab later. He felt his own bleeding shoulder and chuckled to see that the deep wound was still trickling - Ranboo had done a number on it. Dream couldn't even say it had been a stroke of luck, Ranboo had seen an opening and taken it - and it was _deep_. Dream chuckled as he applied a bit of pressure, wincing slightly - yes, he'd have to cauterize it after he dealt with Tommy.

He looked back to Tommy and saw the boy's eyes growing a bit sharper - oh, that would be terrible; to try and tend to his wounds with all the boy's childish anger and rebellion focused on resisting him.

Dream was gentle and slow as he approached, noting how the boy's eyes just barely managed to track his movement. He knelt down before the boy and pulled another potion out of his belt, it's purple hues sloshing around in its thick soupy form. Tommy's eyes slowly tracked his movement and his eyes narrowed.

"I need you to drink this, Tommy," Dream cooed. Tommy always did like it when he was sweet, he loved that gentleness and comfort. The boy blinked once, then twice, making no move to take initiative. Alright then, Dream supposed he'd have to do this himself. Dream gently slid over so that Tommy was on his shoulder and he could hold the bottle to his lips.

"Drink," he urged. It would be very unpleasant if Dream had to force-feed him again and Tommy would make it so much easier on himself if he just listened in this state... but Tommy never listened in any state - it was part of what made him such a challenging perfect little piece of unmolded clay.

Tommy made a small sound, something between a whine and a protest as he curled up a bit and tried to turn his head away from the bottle, burying his face right into Dream's shoulder. Dream chuckled at the irony of that.

"Shhh," Dream soothed, allowing one of his hands to card through Tommy's hair. Gentle and constant, that was what Tommy craved. The boy practically leaned into the touch and Dream hummed in faux pride as he pressed the boy's face into his shoulder. "I need you to drink, Tommy."

Shakily, Tommy's eyes drifted to the bottle and his hands reached up through his forest-green cloak and wrapped around the bottle, putting it to his lips and drinking obediently. He was too delusional to know better and too content with this touch to object to it - perfect. Dream gently continued to shift Tommy's long hair left to right, up and down, letting it settle after he lifted it up - it had grown softer in his time with Phil, longer too.

Tommy shuddered as the potion took its effect, dropping the bottle which slid down his cloak and rolled onto the floor. Tommy whimpered and pressed against Dream's side as the fatigue set in, but eventually relaxed. Good. Dream twisted Tommy over in his hold so that he could clearly see the wound he'd crippled the boy with and the scarlet blood it leaked. Dream shifted forward and drifted a hand over the fire, making it roar into an inferno for only a moment before he reached down and pulled out the steel knife. The blade was glowing now, bright orange and hot to the touch. His eyes slowly drifted from the hot knife to Tommy's bleeding skin and he moved purposefully and decisively.

He quickly pressed it to Tommy's skin and held him steady as the boy screamed, it was a natural reaction. Dream cooed and shushed the boy as he held him firm, removing the blade and ignoring the smell of burning flesh. Tommy shook in his arm and Dream quickly slipped the knife back in the fire before holding the boy to offer some comfort. It had been quick, hardly a few seconds, but Dream doubted Tommy was used to such pain - cauterization was a very primitive method and it could lead to infection and more suffering if done wrong - but Dream never did it wrong. He was familiar with it, not everyone could rely on health potions.

"You did well, you did so well," he praised as he cradled the boy and ran a hand through his hair. He'd stopped the bleeding and held off infection for now. It was a temporary quick-fix but it wouldn't have been necessary had Tommy just listened. Tommy whimpered in his arm and Dream hushed and rocked him until the boy finally fell back into his drugged slumber. Good, Dream had a while now before the boy was lucid.

Dream gently sat Tommy back up and stood, putting a log on the fire (it would last a while now) before making sure Tommy was at an appropriate temperature and was safely propped up against the stone wall. He wrapped the cloak around the boy again, tighter this time so that his drugged self would at least have a bit of a challenge escaping it. That was enough of Tommy... he had more to deal with.

He then pulled his shirt away from his own bleeding wound, ignoring how his thick black blood clung to his fingers. He pulled out the knife again from the fire, knowing it wasn't nearly as hot as it should be, and pressed it against his exposed wound in his shoulder. He was silent as his skin hissed and screamed, burned alive beneath the blade as the wound was forced shut by the scarred skin.

He really should have considered bringing healing potions.

He pulled the knife away and slipped it back in it's sheath, ignoring how the smell of burnt flesh and leather now filled the cave. He reached into his space pocket and pulled out a darker cloak, one black as the night outside. He draped that over his shoulders and pulled up the hood, the rough unfamiliar material foreign to his skin, but manageable. He looked back and walked over to Tommy, crouching down as he took in the boy's sad little state.

"I'll be back," Dream promised gently as he ruffled Tommy's hair. Tommy didn't respond, laying still and exhausted on that wall, like a puppet with its strings cut, he'd be allowed to grow lively again once he re-learned his lessons. 

With that, Dream stood and strode from the cave, pulling stone out of his spacial pocket and quietly beginning to wall up the cave so that the firelight no longer spilled out, leaving a small hole in the top for the smoke to vent. A tap on the wall made certain that it was sturdy and without a spared moment, Dream fled into the night.

He needed to deal with their tail - quickly. 

The storm had died down now, the clouds shifting to reveal little stars and a brilliant moon that was desperately trying to peak through the cover and peer on the world below. Dream felt that familiar little twinge as he looked into the sky and he smiled as he spied the shadow soaring above him, before it fell into a dive.

"Hello, Philza," Dream murmured as he flexed his fingers and summoned his ax. He brought up his other hand and summoned his shield right as the divine survivor slammed into him with the fury and strength of a falling star.

~~~

Philza had flown as fast and true as possible. His wings carried him from the warm air of L'Manburg into the rainstorm fast approaching and finally into slush and then the bite of a northern blizzard.

His sharp eyes easily picked out the glowing cottage and he basically crashed through the door that had been left open.

"TOMMY!" he yelled to the house as he stumbled in and looked around. There was a thin layer of snow at the open door, drifting into the house and melting to the heat of the fire. Philza was met with the terrifying still silence that was never around the same time as his happy blond boy. "TOMMY!?"

Edward made a very sad sort of warble and Philza felt like his stomach was trying to climb out of his throat as he surveyed the scene. The brewing stands had been knocked over, broken glass littered the floor. Whatever potions were stored in the bottles now stained the slightly damp floor and filled the house with an acrid smell.

Phil's heart roared in fear.

He ascended the stairs and desperately looked around the bedroom - nothing. He slid down and double-checked the living room desperately, tearing open boxes and looking under tables before he slid down to the basement and started looking in chests. Nothing! 

He descended to the final level intent to rip up the floor to find Tommy but froze as he looked at the stone room.

Blood.

Small little splashes of it dotted the floor, some green, some red... some tar-like in nature. Philza reached down with a shaky hand and put his fingers to a larger puddle of green blood sitting by the water trough built into the floor... he'd scrubbed blood like this off his own floors in L'Manburg a few weeks ago.

Ranboo...

"TOMMY!?" Philza demanded as he desperately looked around. "It's me! Please Tommy! If you're here, mate, answer!!"

Nothing. Nothing! Philza's eyes caught the hole still in the floor and descended that too. The crawl space was still as claustrophobic as ever... but now it was full of the smell of blood. More evidence of a fight, more evidence that it all had gone terribly wrong.

Oh gods... oh gods. Philza felt like he could hardly breathe as he listened to the terrifying silence that choked him.

Tommy... _Tommy_. Where was he!? 

Rage and fear burned in his chest as he crouched down in the crawlspace to study the darkest blood spots on the stone. There was a splatter of it here, black and congealed. Philza probed it with a finger, the cold substance sticking to his fingers... it was... it was like a spike of energy. The blood on his fingers thrummed and burned with god-like power making everything from Philza's fingertips to his toes shake. 

This was Dream's blood, he'd know it even if the color wasn't familiar. Dream with his sick little smile and happy little voice had been here... and he'd...

He'd taken Tommy.

Philza was flying up the ladder and launching himself up into the sky before he could risk a second thought. He rose into the storm, hovering and balancing in the winds as he looked around the house frantically. There was nothing to track due to the damned storm and the thick snow cover... Philza cursed as his sharp eyes failed to pick out anything. He held his hand out and looked at the black blood still staining his fingers...

He had something to track.

Anger flared in his chest as he thought of Tommy somewhere out in this hell, dragged along by the masked bastard, freezing half-to-death as he cried and cursed and fought (because Philza would bet his last life Tommy was fighting). Philza put the bloodied hand to his chest and let out a long, warm breath. Energy hummed in his fingers, it flowed in his chest, it warmed him and made his feathers tremble as they kept him aloft in the north wind. It seeped into the dark blood on his fingers and took off across the wind, seeking its target and finding the heartbeat that had carried this black blood.

There.

Phil looked northward, the wind slamming against his face as he felt the steady pull of his divine sense. Dream was northward...

Tommy would be too.

Philza fought the wind and raced forward like a bullet, rising above the cloud cover for a moment and soaring between the icy night sky and the frosty clouds below. Faster... _faster_...

  


_The night was still and dark, perfect for all of the echoes of monsters and foes to ring through the air crystal clear. Philza drew his bow and took a breath as he continued to track Wilbur's trail. He could sense him - just a bit further on, but why the child was out here was beyond him - Wil knew the woods were dangerous at night! A spider hissed in the trees ahead of him and Philza had fired an arrow before it had a chance to spy him. The heavy thump that rang through the forest told Phil his aim had been true._

_He crept further, keeping low to the ground as his wings pressed against his back._

_"Wil?" he hissed to the undergrowth. "Wil, where are you!?"_

_That was when the screaming started - the terrified-sort of child screaming that made Phil's heart plunge into his feet._

_"PHILZA!" the scream echoed through the forest and Philza was sprinting before he could think._

_"WIL!" he yelled back. "HANG ON!" He was coming - he was coming! Faster - FASTER! Branches slapped at his face and tried to trip him but he was notching another arrow and bursting through a collection of bushes without hesitation. His arrow found the eyes of another spider and sent the thing hissing to the ground like a deflated balloon. The skeleton on its back, however, raised its arrow and just barely scraped Philza's cheek with its aim._

_Another arrow was notched and aimed in a heartbeat ripping through the skull of the bone-man, his bleached pieces clattering into the grass. Just beyond the pile of bones was a trembling young Wilbur with his back pressed against a tree and his arms wrapped around a baby lamb with a lead around its neck- one of the young ones from the flock._

_"Wilbur!" Phil cried as he ran up and quickly checked him for wounds, fighting down the urge to both wrap the boy in a hug, and slap the shit out of him for being so stupid._

_"Dad - I - the lamb got out - and I - I didn't mean to go so far!" Wilbur sobbed as he held the grey-fleeced creature closer to him. There were large tears in his eyes and his entire childish frame was shaking. "I... I didn't want it to be all alone in the monster fridge... it's bad for kids to be out at night... it's dangerous... I am sorry..."_

_"It's okay," Philza soothed. "It's alright mate, I'm not mad - you just, Jesus, you scared the fuck out of me, Wil. But I'm here now, and you're safe so... let's just go home."_

  


"TOMMY!?" Philza yelled as he dipped below the clouds and began scanning the snowy earth beneath him, keeping a firm hold on his hat as the wind tried to tear it away from him.

Not another one. He wouldn't lose another one. 

The storm was growing weaker, he was in the final gusts of the great blizzard. Stars peeked out from the clouds, the moon even showed her face to the new-fallen snow. Phil narrowed his eyes as a forest of spruce trees appeared before him, tall towers of leaves and bark that he would've passed over had there not been a glimmer of moonlight shimmering off something beneath those trees.

Phil dove like a hawk and landed, throwing snow up into the air as his feet skid across the snow before sinking into the three feet or more of heavy powder. He waded through the freezing snow until he was standing above a scene he hoped he'd never see.

His hands shook as he crouched down and sunk his hands through the snow until it was under the dark glimmering substance he had spotted. His fingers wrapped around it and he pulled - until there was a dark chest plate in his hand, the snow sliding off of it; Tommy's armor.

Phil felt like his lungs had frozen together as his eyes darted around the armor in horror.

"Oh gods," he breathed as he dropped the chest plate and dug further in the snow. He waited for blood, he prayed he wouldn't find it but he was expecting it. Or... he thought he was expecting it. The sight of a scarlet stain on frozen leg guards still brought a strangled cry to his lips. He stopped digging through the snow and clenched the metal armor in hand, there was horror in his chest, empty and echoing as he thought of what it meant... 

He thought of how Tommy's panic always involved him stripping himself of his armor... he thought of Dream's ax and how it had dug into Philza's side the last time they fought. He thought of Tommy... Tommy with his scared little eyes and uncertain stance, how he would jump away from a touch like he expected it to burn but also how he would fight Philza tooth and nail in those moments of pure panic.

Philza clenched the armor as rage, white and hot as the sun, flowed through his veins. He threw the armor away and drew his sword as he slowly got to his feet, freezing only when he saw the smallest little glimmer in the disturbed snow at his feet. He crouched down once more and gingerly plucked up a delicate and terribly familiar emerald earring.

Philza held it in his palm and found himself hardly breathing as the moonlight glimmered in the emerald's face and it's gold decoration.

  


_He'd found Techno's crown. The boy's signature golden signet was strewn in a pool of blood, dented and dim in the evening sky. Philza picked it up with a steady hand and looked at the force of fallen foes behind them. Broken weapons lay strewn in the carnage as the trail of destruction continued onward._

_Philza tried to swallow the raw worry in his chest._

_"Should we continue looking for him, Sire?" a soldier asked, throwing his bloodied blue cape over his shoulder as he looked to Philza for instructions. Philza swallowed the lump in his throat and threw on a pleasing smile._

_"No... Techno would want us to press forward," He assured them as he held the crown gently in his hands. So much blood... so much death..._

_Surely Techno was alright. Surely..._

_"Alright, you heard him, men! Let's move out!" upon the command, the surviving soldiers dawned their Antarctic crested cloaks and trudged through the field of death. Philza hesitated for a moment, his eyes searching through the bloodied plains biome for any sign of the young warlord. His knuckles turned white as he clenched the golden crown and scoured the hills..._

_He came over the hill slowly, cantering on his wounded leg, but as soon as his tall figure broke above the hill's crest Philza smiled. He spread his wings and was by the humanoid hog in seconds._

_"Techno, you scared the fuck out of me," Philza laughed warmly as he landed beside the teenager and gave him a soft clap on the back. The gesture still made Techno wince through his broad grin._

_"Oh, he has no faith in us, chat," Techno chuckled distantly as he limped past Phil. The teenager trudged forward, his eyes on the soldiers moving out, his thoughts only ever on the next fight, and Phil gently followed. He silently handed the boy his golden signet and watched those red eyes light up in the closest thing to gratefulness the boy could have. Something between greed and possessiveness seized the boy's hands as he snatched the crown back, but immediately the boy was gentle again, soft and unsure as he studied the golden circlet and glanced back at Phil, something was broken and yet hopeful in those bloodied eyes of his._

_"Wouldn't want you to lose that, mate," Philza laughed softly as the boy carefully put the golden crown back on his mess of pink hair like it was something sacred. He looked up at Phil, almost sheepishly, and did his best to put on a genuine smile - something strangely endearing despite the way his tusks made it a bit awkward._

_"Thanks... Phil..."_

_"Would hate to lose you, Techno."_

  


Not another one.

Philza clenched the emerald earring to his chest and felt something in him snap. 

Cold. Philza's subconscious noted how cold his chest felt now. Everything else burned, his blood, his mind, his gut was churning with an inferno of rage. But his chest was cold, empty... echoing the same name over and over again as Phil stowed the earring in his pocket and took to the sky.

Dream, Dream, Dream, _Dream_.

He followed his senses like a bloodhound, shooting through the sky as a blue-cloaked bullet and scanning the earth with icy eyes that hoped for blood. His heart yearned for that familiar sense of Tommy's warm presence, he wanted to scoop the boy up and carry him back up where he could take this cold reality away...

But he didn't find Tommy.

His blood and mind mourned that fact... but his cold chest burned with something terrifyingly sick and joyful as Philza spied not Tommy, but Dream.

He was diving, his sword was out and flashing in the moonlight as his raging gut and freezing chest compiled into a monstrous and ethereal screech. His sword slammed into Dream's shield and splinters went flying.

"Philza," Dream's voice was fuel to every burning emotion in Philza's body. Philza felt his feet carry him faster as his wings spread and he threw another swing. It slammed into the shield again and Philza found his face inches away from that mask.

"Dream," Philza spat with all the loathing and fury he could muster - and he could muster enough to fill ten lifetimes.

A glimmer of dark metal in the corner of his eyes made him twist sideways to avoid the ax blow coming for him. He backed away, his feet steady and firm as his wings splayed out and he grit his teeth.

"How nice to see you," Dream's false voice was happy and light, it made Philza sick.

"Where's Tommy!?" Philza demanded. "You tell me right now or I'll fucking kill you - "

" _Tommy_ is perfectly safe," Dream assured Philza. There was something about the way he said Tommy's name that made poison rise in Philza's throat. That was _his_ boy, that was _his_ Tommy and Dream had no right using that fucking tongue to speak his name. He clenched his sword handle and envisioned how fucking wonderful it would feel to chop the bastard into dozens of little pieces and feed him to the fish.

"What did you do to him?" Philza growled as he paced to the left, the two of them beginning to draw a circle in the snow with their footsteps as they circles one another.

"I convinced him to come home - he'd be happier there," Dream soothed. Happier? 

Phil saw Tommy's fearful gaze, heard his occasional stutter, saw his flinches, and suddenly all the divine one could see was white fury.

"You BASTARD!" Philza was screeching in rage as he charged. Dream's ax flew for his face but Philza was parrying and trying furiously to stab the tip of his sword into that bastard's black-cloaked chest, hardly noticing his own mortal dangers. "What did you do!? What did you _do_?!!"

Philza ripped his sword out of Dream's shield and hacked away at it, fury in every blow, never satisfied by the mere sight of splinters flying. He wanted Dream a bloodied mess at his feet, he wanted him mauled beyond recognition.

He was nearly blind to the blow coming from his right. He backed away to avoid it, hissing as the blade caught the lower part of his jaw and left a clean slice in his beard that sent blood trickling down his neck.

"What did _I_ do?" Dream taunted. "No, no, I did what _I_ was supposed to do. What about you Philza? Where were you - I mean - you - you were always talking about 'protecting him' and 'saving him' but where were you?" Dream's high little laugh made Philza feel like his anger was closing around his throat.

"Where is he!?" Philza demanded. "Where is Tommy!?"

Dream casually looked around and shrugged. "Well... I don't see him anywhere around here."

Philza charged again and Dream disappeared in the trees with a lilting laugh. Philza snarled as he discarded his sword and drew his bow, notching an arrow and narrowing his eyes as he tried to follow the dark hooded figure darting through the trees.

His first arrow flew true and the satisfaction that came with seeing Dream recoil as a dark arrow slammed into his back was pure euphoria for Philza. He took to the sky and notched another arrow, his steady aim locked on the dark shadow darting through the trees below him.

"Oh no, you can't get away that easily," Philza growled as he released another black-shafted arrow.

It was impossible to tell if he hit, but he thought he saw Dream's figure faltering for a moment under the blow. Philza flew forward and notched another arrow, drawing the feathers to his cheek as he tried to find the quick shadow in the trees below him.

He growled after the first minute. Nothing moved, nothing stirred. He closed his eyes for a moment and remembered the feeling of Dream's blood, the power that pumped in his heart. There was that familiar pull, somewhere beneath him... he hadn't left. Philza cursed and looked madly around for any sign of the masked godling. Nothing.

"Hiding now, are we!?" Philza challenged as he randomly let loose an arrow into a dark sort of shadow - nothing. "Oh come on out, you bastard," Philza breathed as he notched another arrow.

This was a trap, or a lure... undoubtedly. Philza felt his spine prickle with uncertainty. Should he descend and continue the fight on common ground - or stay here at this stalemate?

Well, his rage wanted to tear the masked bastard apart with his bare hands so - Philza relented and made what he knew to be a poor decision. He descended silently, an arrow still notched as he landed on the snow and glanced all around for that sick smile.

His heart was pounding in his head as his eyes wildly darted from one shadow to the next. His feet and calves were freezing in their snowy surroundings but everything else in Philza was burning, there was adrenaline in his blood and anger in his eyes as he strained to make out any sign in the shadowed woods.

There was a silent take-off from a branch above him, a silent lunge, the slightest disturbance of snow and rustle of a black cloak. Phil was whirling around and releasing an arrow without a second thought, following his instincts, but there was an ax in his shoulder and then two feet slamming into his chest. His arrow flew wild, ripping through loose cloak and flying into the night as Philza slammed into the snow and felt the air leave his lungs.

He re-summonsed his sword but Dream was wrestling him to the ground, pinning him on his stomach and breaking his good arm in an alarming matter of moments. Philza cursed and threw his elbow backward, the ax wound in his shoulder screaming, but the grunt he got from Dream was worth it - until his face was slammed back into the snow and there was a knee digging into his back.

There was a moment of peace, with half of Phil's face deep in the snow and his panted breaths straining through the pain. Above him, he heard Dream's heavy breaths and as his eyes wandered, he proudly noted two arrow shafts protruding from Dream's heavy cloak just barely visible in his peripheral.

"That... that was not very smart, Philza," Dream's voice was shaking with anger and that made Philza smirk.

"Hurt a bit?" he taunted weakly, Dream applied more pressure to his broken arm and he hissed in pain.

"A bit," Dream's voice had reverted back to its faux sweetness, but there was a hidden bite to it. "But I think Ranboo cut deeper."

Philza clenched his jaw and glared at Dream with his one eye that wasn't shoved in the snow.

"You killed Ranboo," Philza growled.

"You have quite a few skilled children hanging around, don't you - you're just the - a magnet for those kids," Dream laughed dryly.

"You fucking killed Ranboo," Philza growled angrily.

Dream dug his knee further into Philza's back making the divine one swallow a gasp of pain.

"I'm sure you're smart, Philza. I mean, how many of the - what are they called - 'original' humans survived this long?" Dream's taunt was distant but it still made Philza swallow a growl.

"It is... impressive," Dream continued. "You're a ... a memory, a remnant of a fallen time, Philza. A time before all of... this. When it was only humanity at the top of the food chain. How's it feel? I... I have wondered..."

Fingers drifted through Philza's feathers and immediately Philza's writhed. His fings flapped wildly, one slamming into Dream's side - not that it did anything. They were quickly stilled as Dream's knee dug between Phil's lungs, so much so Phil thought his ribs were going to break from the pressure. He gasped and stilled in instinct.

"You survived it all, though. You know... I... I think immortality suits someone like you... though... I have wondered what you did... how you earned these..." Dream continued and Phil had to try to not vomit as a hand gently stroked his wings.

"You fucking sadist - " Phil began as his skin prickled with anger and absolute disgust. No one touched his wings - especially not this bastard,

"Quiet," Dream sighed. "Honestly, it's at least fun when Tommy does - it's just annoying from you."

"What do you want with Tommy - why can't you just leave him _alone_!! He's a kid! He doesn't - " Philza yelled as he tried to struggle again.

"Because... he's too fun," Dream laughed simply cutting Phil off. "You can be too, Philza... though I... I really don't like when you break the rules."

"Fun!?" Philza hissed as fury pumped through his heart. "I'll show you fucking fun - "

His words broke into a scream as something dug into his back and exploded in pain. It didn't stop - gods, it should've stopped by now! Something was cutting through his skin, warm and cold all at once, there were fireworks of pain in Philza's mind and he was sure that he was being ripped apart. Dream's knife carved through his skin and he cursed and screamed, trying to pull away but held firm like a butterfly with its wings pinned to a corkboard, still alive and struggling.

There was dark at the edge of his vision as his lungs rasped and shook in terror a shock.

His mind couldn't... it couldn't understand.

There were sickening sounds filling Phil's ears; the sounds of some things wet and soft that were giving way to a knife - he knew that sound and for some reason, he was struggling to understand why he was hearing it. Dream ripped the knife out and Phil gasped and cursed, shaking uncontrollably as his back seared with agony, pulsing with every beat of his heart in unimaginable pain as something was pulled away from him.

"One down," Dream's distant voice hummed and Philza wasn't sure what he meant until it began again.

He tried to flap his wings, get the godling off his back and escape but... but his wings wouldn't listen. He tried to sit up and was pressed back down by Dream's weight. Gods, it hurt. The cold was seeping into every edge of him and he felt like he was freezing and burning all at once. The knife was brutal, merciless and he writhed and shook, seemingly only making it worse as the still bit into his skin at uneven angles. His vision was fading the pain engulfed every part of his brain and kept him still, with only his body shaking uncontrollably as the knife was pulled out again.

"We'll see if silk touch did anything" Dream's voice was a distant toll of a bell that just barely brought Phil back to consciousness as the pressure alleviated from his back. "It took a while to figure out how to put it on a knife... so... you should really be grateful."

"Greatful?" Phil rasped in confusion. Gods, it hurt. His voice broke as he used it like it was delicate glass and he could hardly see anything through his foggy eyes that were overflowing with tears.

Dream's boots strode past his vision and dragging behind them was something long and... soft. Phil knew what that was... what those were. His foggy mind gave him no answer for why there were in Dream's hands and he reached out in painful confusion. There was an uncertain chirp at his throat as he flexed his wings and watched them convulse in... in Dream's hands. He trilled a sorry little warble as something primal in him was mourning something he didn't even understand, his hand reached fruitlessly out for those familiar feathers, longing to touch them - preen them - they were terribly messy it seemed, all bunched up and covered in something thick and wet.

"Goodbye, Philza. Hope to see you again!" Dream's voice grew further and further away... as did Phil's wings.

"Wait..." Philza begged as he tried to push himself up and reached out further for those feathers covered in thick red blood. He wanted to touch them... he wanted to hold them... they were his! They were his wings! He was crying - he wasn't sure why. Probably because it hurt... it hurt so much, it should've stopped by now, shouldn't it? He crawled forward a bit before a shudder seized his whole body and he fell limp, breathing heavily as his back tingled and burned. There was bile in his throat trying to force its way up. He forced his head to lift and just barely managed to make out Dream's distant figure and the trail he was leaving in his wake.

A trail of blood... and feathers.

Phil's vision grew dark and he felt himself growing limp. 

No - No he couldn't leave them again! He couldn't leave yet! He couldn't die! He wouldn't lose his boys again - he wouldn't leave them again.

He couldn't - he _couldn't_.

He looked up to where he knew the stars were and begged, begged to live. Begged to survive. If they heard him, they gave no sign and left him lying there cold and broken, crying over his lost boy and missing wings until he was too weak to cry and too tired to move, too cold to breathe and too distant to recognize the danger.

He was just barely breathing when a horse's hooves galloped closer. His frosted consciousness stirred a bit as the earth shook under him and he forced his frozen eyelashes to open as someone warm (oh gods he missed being warm) came over and gingerly held him, careful to not touch his numbing back. All he could smell was blood and all he could see was snow.

Snow, and blood, and feathers...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I regret nothing, okay, that's a lie - but after I get through the truckload of angst I have I can finally write the fluffy healing chapters I've been planning, haha, this pain is temporary.  
> *shoves the chapters and chapters of angst I have prepared out of sight*  
> Absolutely temporary~


	19. Corrupted Savior

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Complete Techno Backstory? Oh yes~

The wind screamed. It screamed and roared as it bit into Techno's cheeks and stung his nose. His fingers dug into the leather bridal as he urged Carl onward, the horse's legs straining to make good distance in the thick snow. Ranboo sat behind him in the saddle, long arms wrapped around Techno's chest as the boy clung to the Warlord for dear life.

This was the time for Techno to be rejoicing, this was when the voices were supposed to be cheering and laughing, soothing his nerves and fondling their host. This was when his chest stopped hurting and his mind stopped aching...

But the voices screamed and none of it stopped.

There was no celebration of blood; no thankful whispers or gloating from the sick cacophony, there was only horrified, anguished screams. They tumbled and screamed, rolling around in Techno's brain and bashing against his skull, digging into his flesh with their claws as they called out at least one tangible name in that storm of screams and wails; Philza.

It made Techno's chest clench in... fear. He'd admit it was fear, never aloud, but he'd admit it.

He'd grown up with this chaos in his head, and he'd mapped out their discourse finding them to be... predictable. They grew in power and volume the longer he ignored them and they celebrated and allowed him rest when they were satisfied. They teased and taunted him cruelly and were much like children in that regard, save these children found playthings in people and rest in carnage. 

But in all his years, the voices rarely panicked.

They'd done this once... perhaps twice, though only one of those times could Techno steadily remember. That panic had ended with him entering a world with a green-clad godling at arms-length and the corruption in his chest spurring his blade.

The voices rarely panicked. They screamed and shouted, scoffed and shrieked, but never all together... and never in fear.

They were now.

They did now.

And Techno, in all his furs and flimsy iron armor with a pick on his back, felt fear lodge in his chest like a parasite as the voices fear seeped into his bones.

"Faster," he breathed to Carl as he pressed his chest closer to the steed's neck that was rocking back and forth with the horse's powerful hooves that thundered through the snow and sent thick clouds of white powder spraying behind them.

Carl let out a panted breath and at Techno's heels gently nudged once more into his sides, his breaths became more labored and his hooves flew faster, weaving his master and the tall passenger through the trees and back to the familiar snowy plane.

Techno felt his chest seize as the warm distant light flickered into the view through the snow and the trees. They emerged from the tree line and race up to the stairway. Ranboo jumped off the saddle and scrambled up the stairs - but Techno never followed. He shifted in the saddle before the outcry of the voices pierced him like an ice pick in his skull, pinning him absolutely still.

_NO PHIL no no phil NOO Not the house youFOOL TechnoDUMB PHIL! please don't dieTECHNO PHILZA DADZA PLEASE PHIL TECHNO No not house! Trees! Please PHILZA Phil phil TECHNOBLADE snow cold HE'S DYING PHIL NO! DEATH TECHNO PLEASE hold on Phil PLEASE NO!_

Techno felt his entire body seize in inexplicable horror and fear. He didn't understand (though perhaps a small part of him did). He tried to will himself to get off Carl but everything, _everything_ from the voices to his own gut told him to stay put. The snow was sticking to Carl's mane and the horse was panting from the huge expanse they'd crossed, ocean included. Techno breath's mirrored him. Why, _why_ was it so hard to see clearly, why was there red on his vision, why could he smell blood?

He'd... he'd done what the voice told him. He'd killed Quackity - there was still blood on his hands, stuck under his fingernails and clinging to the pink bristles on his pig-like hands. Why were the voices still screaming? Why couldn't they just... why...

"Techno!" Ranboo's cry was raw and desperate as the half-breed threw the door back open, spilling golden light on Techno and Carl. The boy had tears streaming down his face as he raced back down the stairs and grabbed Techno's arm in fear. 

"There's no one here! Not Tommy or Phil or - or Dream! He _has_ him Techno! Dream has him..." Ranbo whimpered.

Techno looked up and around at the blizzard they were in and felt his heart still. There was desperation in Ranboo's raw voice that made Techno feel like ripping something apart with his bare hands. Phil had gone after Dream - he absolutely had gone after Dream.

Techno twisted in the saddle, scanning all of the surroundings with some terrible feeling clawing at his festering ribcage. The storm would end soon, Techno could feel the change in the air - but the damage was done. There were no footprints to track, nothing to follow...

Nothing...

"Chat," Techno's plea was hardly a breath in the storm as Ranbo hoisted himself back in the saddle behind Technoblade. Any other horse would've just refused to move with two passengers but not Carl, not Carl who nickered as he realized what Techno was coming to grips with; this wasn't over.

_Technohelp? PHILNO PLEASE BLOOD please hang on TECHNOBLADE NO help?_

"Chat, please," Techno breathed as he looked around once more. "Which way?"

They knew. He was certain they knew. The only question was now... would they lie to him? Would they watch him scramble over himself and make a fool out of his glory and taunt him, or would they be true and honest?

Techno almost hoped for the former. If he was to be entertainment, it would mean that nothing was wrong, that the chatter was eager to gnash their teeth at something and his foolishness was the easiest prey. It would mean that they were dangling Phil's name over him like he was some starving predator and would mean that Phil was fine and... and not...

"Which way!?" Techno demanded as he forced Carl to turn in a tight complete circle.

_Left! right. straight NORTH that way no STOP TURNING human g-p-whatnow? that way! rightish The trees you dumb - to the mountains YES THERE no STAWP guys left! no now backward TECHNO the coordinates you're looking for are -_

"Chatter!" Techno ordered sharply as he perked up and looked around. Coordinates? Were they really all now yelling incoherent numbers hoping he'd pick up on it? Surely they were messing with him. Surely Phil was fine and they just wanted to tease him.

_TechnoDUMB guys chill PHIL is THAT WAY Blood for the blood god to your left! YES that way NO NORTH there! YES! yes! no! TECHNOO_

"Techno?" Ranboo's voice hardly competed with the madness in Techno's head.

Techno closed his eyes and clenched the bridal in his hands as he tuned out the storm, the ice, the wind, the way Ranboo's shivering figure was seated behind him, the rasping breaths of Carl, the tingling of blood on his hands, the smell of iron stuck in his nose, the faint memory of Phil's laugh in his head.

He thought only of the voices. He dove into that red sea and let the current take him to the hungry fanged mouths of his madness as he listened to their screams.

_Please Techno, left north right turn around, PHIL! right TECHNO north DREAM NO PHILZA PLEASE THAT WAY TECHNO north Blood for the blood god North please Techno PHIL HANG ON North turn around! Technooooo the coordinates are 87527----- North please listen to us North Techno please he's dying North Techno hurry North Techno please North Techno North Techno! North! Blood for the blood god North BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! NORTH!!_

Techno slammed his heels into Carl's side and snapped the reigns. The horse reared with a shriek-like neigh as his hooves slammed into the snow and began their thunderous charge.

"Go Carl!" he ordered as they took off northward. Ranboo nearly fell off the back, his claws catching Techno's furred shirt and clenching it as they flew into the wind that was a gentle roar compared to the screams that encompassed all of Techno's being. He hugged Carl's sides with his thighs as he pushed the horse forward.

They raced into the wind and snow, watching the clouds begin to part ever so slightly so the light could showcase the gorgeous snowfall that now covered everything in sight. The moon danced into view and gleamed off the icy tundra before them.

Carl raced into it and immediately found himself up to his chest in snowfall. The horse heaved and snorted as he pressed forward, still at a half-gallop miraculously as he wrestled the frozen powder aside and carved a trail through it all.

Monsters still perused this hellscape. Techno drew his bow and took out the wandering strays, skeletons with ghastly remains of grey clothing and grey-arrows that tingled Techno's skin every time he narrowly avoided one.

Still, they pressed on for what felt like an eternity until they reached another forest, laden with heavy snow. It was then Techno slowed Carl at the voice's command.

It was dead silent in the early morning air. It was eerily silent save for the sound of Carl's hooves sinking into the snow and the warm breaths of Ranboo and Techno.

"Why did we slow down?" Ranboo asked, his teeth chattering as he leaned closer into Techno.

Techno didn't answer. He slowly scanned the area as Carl continued his slow walk forward. The voices still screamed, but it was... lessened. They were seemingly waiting, anticipating something. Everything was holding its breath it seemed.

Then Carl stopped dead and looked around, his nostrils flared and he shook his mane. Techno looked up and down the trees where the wind was blowing from. He peered past the snow-laden bushes and through the heavy green branches of evergreens. He cared not for the greens or the whites, nor the browns or the dark blue of the skies.

He cared for the distant glimmer of red.

Another snap of the reigns sent Carl crashing through the undergrowth. Branches bit at Techno's numb face and slapped at his ears but his eyes were trained on that distant glimmer of scarlet.

They leaped over a wall of thick thorny berry bushes and landed on the other side, Techno pulled on the reigns and brought Carl to a dead stop.

Everything stopped.

His heart, his lungs, his mind... the voices. It all froze as he looked at the scene a few meters away. Never had anything felt so still.

"No..." Ranboo's small voice was the spark to the terror in Techno's throat. Suddenly, everything was moving again.

All he could hear was his heart. It pounded in his head and drove out the voices who had fallen nearly silent save for the ever-going chant. Techno had dismounted and was running towards the puddle of red before he'd fully taken in what he had seen.

He was sprinting for the body... and then suddenly he was a boy again. A small helpless little child with tusks and hooves, squealing in fear and running as fast as he could from the village because there was blood on his hands _and a small part of him loved the way it stuck to his fingers and clung to his skin but the rest of him was screaming in horror because he had killed those children and it had been so easy and he had LIKED it so he must be a monster and he was a monster and_ -

"Phil!" Techno yelled as his hooves sunk into a deep patch of snow. He pushed on, his breaths growing short and strained as he blinked desperately, hoping the scene would change. 

He ducked under a branch... and he was a teenager now, ducking under the blade of his opponent and digging his own into the challenger's stomach. He was a young bloodied teen with a smile on his face and a sword in the sky as the audience called his name, drowning out the voices in his head _because they liked it when he killed and he hated it but here they were quiet and here it was alright to kill and he could sleep at night like this knowing that everyone he'd slaughtered had asked for this life and the voices were content with that_.

He was back now, back in the present, collapsing at the bloodied man's side. It was everywhere, all over the snow like some colorful ruby on a soft display pillow. Techno's hands shook as he reached out and touched one of the body's ice-cold hands... he was a teenager again. He was a teenager and he was fighting in a war now, not that it was much different from the arena, and he was used to being left behind... but the king always waited for him with his soft blue eyes and awaiting hands that were always soft when they patched up his wounds. Only the king cared to patch up his wounds. Techno grew to love those soft warm hands for they protected him and held him when nothing else in the world dared to _because he was a monster who could not be contained but Phil never minded or cared that Techno was covered in blood for he invited him home after the war was done and always ready to clean up any blood on Techno's skin to make him feel safe and sometimes if Techno closed his eyes while those hands held him he could pretend he was normal and not a beast or monster_.

"Phil?" Techno hardly registered his voice as his own as it cracked. He gently picked up the ice-cold body and pulled it into his arms as he hugged the bloodied man, careful to avoid the hideous gaping holes in his back that leaked out crimson blood like it was trying to replace the wings he'd lost with ones made of scarlet and snow. Techno held Philza as something warm trickled down his cheek, he would later realize they were tears, and his lungs stopped working. 

He felt like a teenager again. A teenage boy who'd seen war and been a champion in the arena but who was crying in a retired king's barn as he held the corpse of a dead lamb. He sobbed as he held the bloodied lamb and hardly registered Philza's presence until the man was next to him, holding him and telling him it was alright even though it wasn't _because the voices had told him to kill that baby lamb he'd named and fed and loved and he had done it without hesitation because he was a monster and he could never pretend to feel peace or live happily. He was a monster and he needed to act like one and no one was safe with him around_.

"Phil. Phil, please," Techno breathed as he cradled the man.

He'd... he'd... lost?

He'd lost to L'Manburg. He'd been caught. He would've been executed if not for Phil. He'd lost Tommy. He'd... He was going to lose Phil.

Something took root in Techno's festering chest making every single one of his mortal cells recoil. Something in Techno's soul withered at the realization and he felt death's claws sink into his skin...

Corruption.

He was corrupted.

Techno felt panic eat away at his consciousness as he felt sobs press into his throat. He held Philza closer and _screamed_.

He was Technoblade. Lord of Blood and Death, godling and vassal of the Blood God. He never lost a fight and he never found peace...But he'd lost this time, and now his god demanded retribution. Victory, or death.

Techno remembered the last time he'd felt this in his soul. He remembered waking up late at night as that young teenager with the memory of a lamb's blood on his hands. He remembered silently stepping into Philza's room that night with a knife in hand, hardly registering what the corruption was telling him to do until he was right above the winged one's bed with a knife poised to kill the slumbering saint. He remembered his voices screaming at him, for the first time in his life, to not kill _because that was Phil and Phil was kind so please please don't Techno don't listen to the corruption we know we're cruel but no this one he's is kind don't listen please_. He remembered running from the farm as fast as he could because it was only a matter of time until he killed Philza and he would _never_ take that risk.

Corruption destroyed you. It destroyed Techno when he dared to fail or falter from his path of blood. It ate you alive as a godling and he was nearly ready to embrace that. But he remembered a pale monstrous face smiling uncertainly and a hand offered in salvation. He remembered the smell of Dream's corruption and how the fellow godling was rotting away because he'd broken his own oath. He remembered the two of them giving in to what the corruption asked of them and massacring all before them until their gods were pleased enough to save them, _spare_ them from their own mortal coils.

For Dream, that had meant fighting until there was nothing left to disrupt the peace. For Techno, that had meant fighting until no one else could stand against him.

Funny how the two of their oaths were so alike.

Techno swallowed a sob as he thought of Dream and smelled that familiar rot in the air... and all over Philza. Dream... Dream had done this. Dream had done this and Techno hadn't been able to stop it. He'd taken his knife and plunged it into Phil's back - Techno felt he was going to be sick. His fingers ghosted over the gruesome holes in Phil's back and had to remind himself that he'd seen worse, _done_ worse... but never, _never_ to Phil!!

There was no victory in this plane of snow and ice, only blood and Philza. Philza! The man who helped him and trained him and taught him and... and _loved_ him. Because it had always been love, and Techno had always known, but it scared him half to death to admit it. That warm feeling he felt had always terrified him... and right now it was destroying him and feeding his corruption.

"Phil! Phil _please_!" Techno sobbed as his entire body shook. " _Please_!"

"Is he... is he - " black and white claws reached out to touch Philza, _his_ Philza.

" _Stay away from him_!" Techno snarled as he held Philza closer and glared at the attacker - at Ranboo. The boy recoiled and backed away in fear - fear... that's right... that's right, he was Technoblade, a monster who scared away everyone and got the only man who cared for him killed. 

Killed? Techno looked up as his ears tried to lie to him, hearing a pulse that couldn't be there.

_Pulse! ALIVE TECHNO PLEASE PHILLLL Ranboo aww no TECHNO BLOOD_

Techno felt Philza's neck with two fingers to try and prove that his ears were deceiving him... but they only lied to him too.

There was a pulse, faint and gentle against Techno's firm fingers, like the small twitches of a dying butterfly. Techno could hardly breathe as he finally looked at Phil's face and tried to search for any sign of life in that pale complexion that was as white as the snow crystals clinging to Phil's hair and lashes.

Techno couldn't breathe and couldn't swallow, but he could pick up Philza and carry him over to Carl with the speed of an executioner's ax. He threw the man onto his saddle, back to the air exposing the horrific mutilation of his back - but Techno didn't look at that, _couldn't_ look at that. He ignored the voices and how they were mortifyingly obsessed with how red Phil's blood was.

He was jumping into the saddle and ignoring the strange tears on his face without another thought. He still couldn't breathe but that hardly seemed important now. Phil was still breathing - nothing else could matter more than making sure it stayed that way. He had the man between him and Carl so that he could keep a careful hand on the limp man.

"Techno?" Ranboo demanded running over to the steed as Techno turned Carl back to where he knew their home would be. He needed to get Phil home. He needed to get him to safety!

"Techno!" Ranboo shouted. "What about Tommy!? We have to find Dream!"

_"I need you to choose Tommy over me"_

Techno didn't even glance at Ranboo. He didn't... he couldn't. He'd lied to Philza that day and he'd lie to him every day after if it meant he could just keep Phil breathing. He spurred Carl onward and they took off again.

"Techno! _Techno_!!" Ranboo's voice was a haunting call that grew faint as Techno abandoned him to the snow and blood. He didn't matter. Nothing else mattered! 

Not Tommy, not Dream, not Ranboo, _nothing_ , not even the heartbeat in Techno's own chest. He'd rip it out of him in necessary - if that was what it took to keep Philza's heart beating.

There were tears in Techno's eyes and he couldn't understand why - Philza was alive! Philza was alive... that's all that mattered...

"Stay with me, Phil!" Techno shouted as they raced over the tundra, Carl followed the carved out trail they'd made on their way out here. "Stay with me!!"

How much blood had he lost!? How long had he been out in the snow!? How was he alive!?

The voices were a jumble of conflict but Techno pushed them down along with sickening nausea that corruption brought to his rotting chest. 

He pushed it all down as he left Carl untethered in the front and carried the limp fallen survivor into his house (had he always been so small? it was so easy to forget when he had such large wings behind him but when Phil was in Techno's arms the elder seemed so... tiny, frail even). He found himself handling the frozen figure with gentleness he didn't remember ever possessing. He carried Philza over his shoulder and took him up to Tommy's old bedroom (the only functioning bedroom they actually had). He took off all of the bloodied and damp clothing, hesitating only when it came to Philza's back... and the wings he was missing.

Techno felt his hands shake as he gingerly peeled layers of clothing off those bloodied holes, like ravines carved into the earth of Phil's skin. Techno's vision went red for a moment and he had to step back and bite into his knuckles until he tasted that familiar coppery bite of his golden ichor. He slowly looked back to the bloodied holes carved into Philza's back where his wings had once sprouted, broad and proud.

There were tears in his eyes again and Techno couldn't understand why his mind was filling with thoughts of Phil and him. He was vividly remembering sitting in a small farmhouse with sheep baaing from the window, his hands picking through Philza's large feathers as Phil smiled at him. Why - why was he remembering this!? He didn't want to remember Phil's bright eyes or his broad smile or how soft and sacred those grey feathers had felt to his hands... his hands that had only ever been trusted to hold weapons being allowed to care for something as important and delicate as those soft feathers.

Techno clawed at his head as the voices squabbled amongst themselves and left him desperately reaching for ways to fix this...

He needed to warm Phil up and stop the bleeding. 

Prioritize blood - always prioritize blood. Techno was flying down the ladder and fumbling with his brewing stands faster than he could think. The brewing stands were toppled over and the glass bottles were shattered - fine. Techno ripped apart his chests, throwing items around until he pulled out a soft pink potion and was racing back up the ladder with both that and a wet washcloth.

_"Regeneration potions can kill you if you're too exhausted, same with health. Don't just use em' blindly mate."_

Phil's advice echoed like a choir in Techno's mind and he clung to the memory of that voice as he dribbled regeneration potion sparingly on the washcloth and gently pressed it against the ugly open wounds.

Phil's breath hitched upon contact and Techno felt his heart leap in his throat as fear and joy competed for dominance in his chest.

Too much shock right now could send Phil into cardiac arrest (or at least Phil had told him that once - something about lots of movements jarring the heart or ... gods, Techno needed to remember the details - was that even right!?)

But Phil had reacted - he was _breathing_.

The voices were telling Techno to press down harder just to see if Phil would react - if maybe the pain would make him wake up. Or maybe that was just the monster within Techno. 

He bit down on his knuckles again and gently applied the washcloth with the other hand, ignoring the strained whines that escape Phil's lips as best he could. Tears were still falling from his eyes and he couldn't understand why until he had patched up Phil as best he could and was kneeling by his bedside... just watching him breathe. Just crying in thankfulness as he watched the man _breathe_.

He'd watched the holes in Philza's back begin to close with the diluted regeneration potion. He'd watched the color return to Phil's cheeks as Techno lay think blankets over the man, being careful to lay them gently on his tender back. He'd watched this man fight and kill and laugh and dance...

but it felt like a gift just to watch him breathe.

Techno knew it was selfish... he knew it was terrible, but his hands fumbled under the blankets and found Philza's still cold hand. He held that hand for all he was worth and knelt there, holding that callused hand with his two scarred ones (one of his hands still bleeding with golden blood from where Techno had bit himself).

He knelt there for minutes... hours even. He knelt and waited, his body trembling as his hands held steady to Phil's palm. He... prayed. He hated doing it, but there was nothing, _nothing_ to offer him solace. He was crying and praying and cursing all at once. He hated the universe, he hated it for doing this to Phil... Phil, who was only ever kind and forgiving. Phil, who looked at a monstrous piglin hybrid covered in thick crimson and asked him if he wanted to come to his farm after the war was over. Phil, who taught Techno to farm the earth, who helped him plant his first potato and praised him in the harvest, who raised young lambs, and who told Techno it was alright when he slaughtered them.

Phil...

"Please... please stay..." Techno breathed, his voice raspy and dry as it crackled through the air. 

He knelt there, refusing to move. Even when his own wounds started to ache from his fight with Quackity, even when he remembered he'd left Carl somewhere out there unprotected and untethered, even when the door creaked open and someone ascended the ladder.

"Is... is he... alive?"

Techno slowly looked over, his wild pink hair falling out of his face as he found Ranboo standing uncertainly in the room with him. The boy's shoulders were hunched, his skin was pale, and his lips were chapped. There were fresh scars on his cheeks like he'd cried magma.

"Ranboo," Techno rasped.

"I - I put Carl away, he was hanging out around the house so I just put him back in his pen and - and I... I... I went and - well, and I got back safely and all."

"I... I guess I did leave you out there... I did abandon you, didn't I?" Techno asked dryly as he held Phil's hand just a bit tighter. That was... on brand, wasn't it? He'd left Ranboo... he'd forsaken Tommy... he hadn't been there when Phil needed him.

_"I need you to choose Tommy over me."_

Techno closed his eyes and shook in shame and disgust at everything he'd done... all he failed to do.

"Well... yeah," Ranboo murmured. "B-but I get it, Phil was hurt and - and you know I may have done that same and all if it was Tommy or Tubbo or -"

"I'm sorry," Techno whispered to Phil. He whispered it to Ranboo too, maybe. He whispered it to anyone who was listening and he meant it. He meant it from the bottom of his rotting chest to the crest of his pounding head adorned with maddening voices.

"... I didn't find Tommy," Ranboo's whimper made Techno look up at him again. Ranboo's eyes were glistening with tears and the boy was hugging himself, still shivering. "I looked - I tried so hard and I looked everywhere, I followed a blood trail from Phil's wings... and I - I found a cave but he's gone and so is Dream... I'm sorry."

Dream.

That name brought a whole new surge of emotion to Techno's corrupted chest. Dream had done this. Dream did all of this. Dream was responsible for Phil's blood and the corruption taking root in Techno's chest.

_Kill him blood Dream blood for the blood god kill him Technoblade never dies blood for the blood god blood for the blood king skulls for the skull throne blood for the blood god_

The voices were a respectful volume now. They were quiet, and they were full of rage. Techno felt them gently urge him away from Philza's bedside, giving him the strength to stand as he walked to the ladder and passed Ranboo.

"Techno?" Ranboo asked uncertainly.

The voices coddled Ranboo for a second, holding him in their forgiving hands and begging him to forgive their master for his heartlessness as Techno ignored him and descended the ladder. Then they were back to supporting Techno. They caressed his skin and soothed his agony with sweet promises and certain assertions. They praised him gently as he treated his own wounds and held him tightly as he ignored the pain. They led him to a chest in his basement that he pulled out from the bottom shelf and threw open. He stripped off his iron armor and the soft blue hues of his retirement he'd been hoping to keep adorning. He dropped the pick with Quackity's blood staining its tip.

No more.

It all slumped in a pile off to a side like a collection of dead corpses that were to sit and rot for all the use they'd served him. Techno reached up and ran a hand through his loose hair, feeling all the knots that caught on his fingers and his eyes narrowed. He looked into the chest he'd opened and slowly began pulling out its item.

A frilled royal white blouse with golden buttons down the center of it, dark pants, a pair of boots tailor-made for his hooves, a collection of golden jewelry studded with rubies, a dark hair tie, a scarlet red cape, and a golden crown. Treasures. Curses. Chains and shackles decorated with gold and fabric.

He adorned them like it was a ritual, listening to the chatter grow bolder with every item donned. He brushed his hair, taking time and care until his wild mane was tame again, but not into a tight braid or a gentle cascade hanging loose. He wrestled it upward into a simple updo and let the rest hang loose in that ponytail. He decorated himself in bright jewelry, putting the studs in his ears and wincing as he found himself having to re-pierce a few.

Over his shoulders went the scarlet cape with its soft white-fur lining. On his head went the golden coronet with it's few rubies offering it complexity.

"You'll probably need these," a voice interrupted his ritual and he looked behind him to find Ranboo standing at the ladder, holding up a dark sword in one hand and a chest plate in another. Techno looked him over and slowly nodded, there were no words in his throat and nothing lending itself to this interaction except his hand that reached out and grabbed the hilt of his sword. 

He slipped the sword into the sheath around his waist and slowly started taking armor from Ranboo's hands, strapping it on himself until he was a shell of netherite with a cape the color of blood crowned with a circlet of gold.

The voices hummed. The corruption settled.

They both knew what was coming.

"Where are you going?" Ranboo asked as Techno went to the door and opened it out to the dawning sky. It was an orange sky now, colored grey by the clouds still moving out - not red... 

"Take care of Phil? When he's conscious again give him a regen potion," Techno ordered as he walked out.

"You're going after Dream... right?" Ranboo asked uncertainly. Techno looked back and saw the boy fiddling with his claws.

Dream... 

Techno had many thoughts regarding the man, some reminded him of how Dream cowered from his own reflection and clung to Techno with blood on his lips and his own sword in his chest.

_"Thank you, Techno... you're... if I do come back after this, I hope I can give you that rematch..."_

That was what Dream had said after they'd both cured their corruption. After they both left a world soaking in blood.

They'd had a rematch after that, one for laughs and the challenge.

Now there would be another one.

"Take care of Phil," Techno ordered and he strode out into the snow. Blood on his mind and stained on his hands... but not the blood he was used to, the blood that made the voices in his head growl in the lust for retribution; Phil's blood.

"Dream," Techno growled, reaching out to the fellow godling through a mental message, he didn't care who could hear him now. "Meet me at the mountain."

He'd know what Techno was talking about. He'd know...

"Now? Alright," Dream's voice chirped back, arrogant and cautious all at once. "Let's talk, Technoblade."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that's all of Techno's confusing backstory compiled together and utilized for angst. Heck. Yeah.


	20. Rising Icarus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uhh, Tommy's suffering  
> Techno vs Dream, the sequel  
> Have I mentioned Dream's a little messed up? Have I? Well, let me reiterate it a little more.

The first thing Tommy dimly recognized when he woke up was how much his body ached. It felt like his blood had been weighted and left to sit idle in his vessels, all of his muscles groaned and ached like he had the flu or some shit - and his calf was throbbing like he'd placed it on the stove (a small part of him recalled that time he'd place his hand on the wood stove in his old house and his chest felt warm to remember how Wilbur had panicked as he tried to treat it - the poor idiot, he didn't deserve half the shit Tommy had put him through as a kid).

The second thing he realized was someone was carrying him. 

He groaned as he tried to wiggle out of the warm grip. Foggy memories danced in his mind, the recollection of ice made his skin tingle and brought a shiver to his spine. It wasn't cold anymore, it was damp now, humid even. Tommy gingerly opened his eyes and looked up at the cloudy orange sky above him through his eyelashes.

"Hmm, you should have had at least ten more minutes," a distant voice drawled making Tommy's subconscious sluggishly recognize something was amiss.

Tommy held his head and groaned as his entire body ached in unison. Where was he? What the fuck was happening? Why did he hurt so much? He should probably tell Phil he was sick or some shit.

"Phil?" he slurred as he squeezed his eyes shut.

"Hm, nope," that same voice chirped.

It sure didn't _sound_ like Phil. Tommy felt his mind clear a bit leaving him with a pounding headache. His eyes flickered open again and he found himself leaning into a dark cloak. 

Okay... that was... strange. But plenty of people Tommy knew had dark cloaks (hell, knowing how thespian Techno could be, the guy probably had a collection of studded ballgowns and suits in his closet). Tommy's eyes drifted upwards, his heart slowly falling further and further into his gut. His eyes went past the metal clasps of the cloak, past the leather strap thrown over the person's shoulder, past the tall collar, under the heavy hood, until they rested on a terrible sight; the mask.

Tommy was absolutely silent as he gazed up at that mask in horror. There was a scream in his throat that was stuck somewhere between his mouth and his heart, choking him like a claw around his neck.

"Hello Tommy," Dream greeted cordially.

Tommy had thrashed out of that hold faster than a rabbit freed from a cage. He fell to the damp grass with a heavy thud and tried to scramble away before those strong callused hands were grabbing his arm and dragging him onward despite his struggles.

"Let me go! Fucking let me go you fuck!" Tommy yelled. His own voice made his head throb and he felt like screaming, sleeping, and crying all at once.

"We're almost there," Dream's voice was all gentle and soft like it had been in fucking exile - like he was taking Tommy to some party and not dragging him to... okay Tommy didn't actually know where he was going - but it was _definitely_ nowhere good!

Tommy felt his breaths doing the stupid shaky thing they did when his lungs refused to work and his chest closed around his heart. He desperately clawed at Dream's hold on his arm.

"Let me go, _let me go_!!" Tommy screeched.

"Hush," Dream's voice had gone cold, making Tommy's gut do that terrible flip-flop thing. Tommy wildly looked around and realized that... that he knew this place. It wasn't that far from L'Manburg - from his _home_. It had to be just over that hill, just beyond those trees.

"Where - where are w-" Tommy's words died on his lips as he looked up to Dream and finally took in that terrible sight. Finally saw the bloodied trophies that bastard has slung over his back like some sort of carcass from a hunt.

He finally saw Philza's wings.

"We're taking you somewhere where I can keep you from causing any more problems," Dream stated simply with a little shrug as he pulled Tommy to his feet and quickly moved his grip to the back of Tommy's neck like he was leading a disobedient pup.

"Wha - Where did you get those?" Tommy breathed shakily as he craned his neck to keep an eye on those large bloodied wings strapped to the hunter's back, their feathers sprouting out in all sorts of different directions... that was so wrong, Philza never let his wings get that bad.

Dream only chuckled as they pressed forward.

Tommy tripped as the grass beneath his feet transitioned to sand and was only kept upright by one of Dream's stupid steady hands 'helping' him.

"What did you _do_?" Tommy demanded, his voice unable to be much more than a horrified whisper as his eyes darted back to those wings. Why - _why_ were they so bloody. Fuck, he was going to be sick. Was Phil... had he been... no, _no_ Dream couldn't have - Philza was a big fucking man and he was fine. The wings were fake - absolutely... it... it couldn't be - no _fucking_ way.

"Now let's have a nice end to the trip, shall we?" Dream asked pleasantly.

Anger flourished in Tommy's clearing mind allowing him to thrash, pushing Dream away from him as he ripped free of his grasp.

"What did you _do_!?" Tommy screamed.

Immediately he was being pinned to the ground, drowning in the warm sand.

"Tommy - " Dream's voice was low and dangerous in his ear, " - you've been so good this far, don't go and ruin it."

"Good!? You fucking _drugged_ me! That's - That's fucking illegal man! You - you've broken so many fucking laws and - and you're a real bitch you know that!" Tommy managed with a mouthful of sand.

"Hush." Dream was clearly in no mood to put up with his language, "I'm going to put down a boat and you're going to get in it, do you understand?"

A boat - why would they need a boat - 

Logstedshire. Dream had taken him by boat to Logstedshire the first time. No - no he was _not_ going back there!

Dream released his grip and Tommy pushed himself up as he heard the man pull a small rowboat from his space pocket, he heard the wood hit the water and he ran. Tommy pushed off the sand and started sprinting without a care of where he was heading - but didn't get far before there were fingers digging into his shoulder and dragging him back. There was an arm wrapping around his chest and dragging him backward despite how he kicked and writhed. He was pulled back until he was shoved into a boat, his aching head slamming into the wood. His vision faded for a moment scaring the hell out of him.

Dream stepped in the rowboat after him and put a foot on his chest, pinning him in the bottom as the man took the oars.

"Stay," Dream ordered from above.

Tommy's ears were ringing and his head was pounding from the drugs and the pain and the countless concussions he probably had. He tried to pry Dream's boot off his chest but the guy must've been made of steel or some shit... or Tommy was still half-drugged, both were possible.

"I... I'm not going back," Tommy rasped. "I won't let you take me back."

"Back?" Dream laughed, that dumb fucking mask tilting slightly as the man began rowing, taunting Tommy with that stupid smile. "No, no, I'm taking you somewhere new, somewhere special - just for you."

Well, that sounded fucking foreboding as shit.

"I won't _fucking go_!" Tommy managed bravely.

Dream's foot pressed a bit harder into his chest and Tommy sneered as that mask tilted a bit further.

"Tommy, you don't have a choice," Dream cooed almost lovingly. Tommy felt like that tone was going to make him sick.

Always like that - Dream was always like that. He acted all-powerful and so fucking arrogant, but there was nothing Tommy could _do_! He could only lay there in the bottom of the boat with his god-awful headache and throbbing body as Dream rowed him further and further from shore.

The dawn was growing lighter and Tommy watched as the sky above him started turning a gentler shade of yellow, nearly blue by this point. The heavy cloud cover was moving away exposing a beautiful warm sky above. There was something beautiful about that sky... something that made Tommy's aching head tingle slightly with those fucking happy feelings as he spied a flock of seagulls flying south. For a moment, he could close his eyes and listen to the gently sloshing of the waves around the boat, feel the sun on his face, feel the breeze in his hair, and for that moment there was no Dream, no wings, no blood, no fucking complicated feelings or fucked up thoughts, just Tommy... Just Tommy...

"Almost there," Dream's voice shattered the illusion and Tommy's eyes flew open as something huge and dark blocked out the sun. Dream moved his boot off Tommy's chest so the boy could look up at the literal hell that sat before him.

Black walls rose from the water and blocked out the rising sun while its watchtowers stood menacingly like prison guards. The whole structure frowned down at Tommy like he was some bug to be squished. Tommy had a plethora of curses to describe that thing, but he couldn't seem to make his throat work anymore.

"Impressive, isn't it?" Dream asked with a dry chuckle as he docked the boat at the entrance.

"Wh - What is this!?" Tommy choked finally, his voice rasped and strained like a bending twig ready to snap.

Dream got out of the boat and waited patiently for Tommy to follow.

"Come on," he urged after a few moments.

"No - _No_! What the - what the fuck is this!?" Tommy demanded, wincing as his own voice carved into his aching head.

"This - Well, is your new home. _Temporary_ home. It's nice, right?" Dream asked.

Tommy stuttered for words for a second as he tried to understand how 'nice' could ever be used to describe this nightmare. "It's - it's a fucking fortress!"

"Let's go, Tommy," Dream sighed as he reached down and hauled Tommy out. The boy stumbled out of the rocking boat and onto the brick, taking a moment to remember how to walk. As soon as he caught himself he looked up at the building and shivered. Dream grabbed his arm and moved to pull him forward but the gnawing fear in Tommy's chest made him rip away.

"No - no, I'm not going in there! You're - you are _not_ putting me in there!" Tommy cried as he tried to back away.

"Tommy," Dream scolded gently. "You - you should really be thankful. I mean look at this thing! It's huge, and I made it especially for you!"

"You - you think that makes this any fucking better!?" Tommy challenged.

"Let's go, Tommy."

"No!"

"Now."

"No - NO! You're - you're not getting me in there!"

Dream sighed and had closed the distance between them before Tommy could blink. He had grabbed Tommy's arm and was pulling him towards the entrance by the time Tommy's slow-ass-fucking-useless mind was registered it. He dug his heels into the stone and pulled against Dream's iron grip, cursing and snarling, feeling like he had been caught in a snare.

The walls were rising now, like a tidal wave to come crashing down on him. Tommy felt his breath leaving his body in staccato, leaving him gasping like a fish. They passed the threshold and plunged into the maze of obsidian and blackstone, immediately making something in Tommy's mind snap as the walls closed in around him.

He felt feral, his heart pounded and his adrenaline rushed, telling him that if he didn't stop this he was dead. He was trapped. He was strung upsidedown by a snare and if he didn't fix this right fucking now there would be no way out of it. He lashed out, barreling into Dream and thrashing as he tried to break out of his grip. The two of them crashed into the ground and Tommy was throwing punches (meager fucking punches because he felt weak as fuck but punches nonetheless). He punched as hard as he could, screaming curses and throwing fists until Dream retaliated and threw his fist into Tommy's aching head. Then, Tommy was eating the hits, tanking the blows... acting like a fucking punching bag as Dream pushed Tommy off him and took his turn throwing punches. There was blood in Tommy's mouth from where he'd cut his cheek on his own teeth, there was blood on his forehead from where it had gotten acquainted in the floor, there was now blood trickling from his nose (fuck was it broken?)... there was just blood all over the fucking place, wasn't there?

Tommy may have blacked out after one of those punches found his head again because the next thing he knew he was being dragged across the floor. The obsidian flooring was scraping against his skin in an agonizing manner. He tried to pull his arm away from Dream's grip yet again (he was going to have fucking torn muscles in this arm by the time they got to their destination). Dream's grip only tightened and his pace quickened. Tommy had no more fight to him, his mind was swimming in pain and fog - and his body was as helpful as a fucking sack of bricks. He whined in pain and felt tears pricking at his eyes but he refused to let them fall - he was a big man, a big fucking man!

The hallways got darker (or Tommy was falling unconscious again - impossible to tell). The obsidian got colder. It all got more terrible - which was miraculous because Tommy would've bet this day couldn't get any worse. He was dragged into a thin obsidian hallway that went on for was felt like a while before he heard the sound of Dream opening an iron door.

Then he was flying.

Okay - it was a short flight because he was crashing into the obsidian ground and crying out in pain a moment later. He curled up around himself as he prepared for a boot to collide with his ribs or something equally terrible, but nothing came.

"You... You're going to stay here until - well, until I can learn to trust you to not cause problems. Understand?"

Dream's voice was something that pierced Tommy's aching head and made him flinch. He opened his eyes and just barely made out Dream standing at the doorway. 

"This prison isn't finished yet so this is the best I could cobble together, okay? Don't cause problems and maybe you'll be able to leave soon, understand?" There he went, being all soft and fake and false and - 

"Understand!?" Dream's voice sharpened in a moment and instinctively Tommy hissed out a "yes."

He flinched as he heard the iron door slam and didn't even move as he was sure Dream walked away (stupid silent footsteps). He lay there, on the cold stone...

And he cried.

Fuck - fuck he was supposed to be getting better - he was supposed to be better! He sobbed as he thought of Phil's wings strapped to Dream's back like some sick fucking trophy... who the hell was going to make this better!? Phil couldn't, he was... he was...

Tommy screamed as he sobbed and crawled over to a corner of the obsidian room where he could curl up and pretend that he was anywhere else but here. He probably started screaming for Phil - hard to say. He couldn't remember much of anything except how his swimming vision started to fade to black after he reached the corner. 

His mind hurt, his body ached... his chest was fucking _burning_.

And he was here. Here, trapped, with _Dream_.

Him finally blacking out felt like a fucking blessing.

~~~

They were to meet on the mountain - poetic, Dream thought. It was their meeting place after all. A place where the sky and the earth met the sea, a show of raw natural power and isolation.

He got there first - unsurprisingly. Dream looked out to the waves and sighed as he sat on the grass and watched the sun rise higher into the blue sky. He really didn't need to be here - he should be with Tommy. He should be waiting outside Tommy's cell waiting for the critical moment to step in and catch him after he took the familiar plunge into despair.

Oh well.

Dream picked the dirt out of his nails and kept his eyes on the horizon, searching for any sign of his old fr - rival. His old rival.

Because that was what they were to Technoblade, that was all their little relationship was to the pig. It was infuriating how blind his fellow godling could be. They were... kin, almost. Something so close in likeness that masquerading it under a veil of "competition" cheapened it. They'd fought by each other, killed for one another, Techno had been the one to hold Dream in his final moments all those lives ago...

And Dream had been fooled that maybe, just for a moment, they had shared something. That maybe, when they were stripped down to their oaths and instincts, there was something sacred there - something between the two of them that connected the blood in their veins. Something that made them fellow gods donned in blood.

He thought maybe Techno had understood him.

But Technoblade was a foolish man, tethering himself to mortal planes. He hadn't fully embraced the loneliness that came with immortality and so he was just as foolish and blind as the others. If Dream could still long for something, he figured he would long for... kinship. For someone to understand why he was doing all this. He would long for Techno to look at him with those cold red eyes and understand... _understand_ that Dream was a monster - but that he... he accepted that. He accepted what he was, he _embraced_ what he was and he did it selflessly. He would long for Techno's voice to tell him he was alright to do this - but Techno refused to understand.

No one cared to understand. The only one who could was Techno and he _refused_ to. There wasn't a shred of sympathy in the pig and any empathy was likely swallowed by his insanity.

But... if Dream could still long for something...

No. He closed his eyes and forced all of that away. 

Gods, he was getting too fragile. 

He forced himself to think of Tommy in Techno's stead. Tommy by his side, Tommy with a sword stained with blood and those cold grey eyes looking at Dream and _understanding_. Tommy would understand at least, he would... one day.

Ah. There he was.

A shiver went up Dream's spine and he smiled under his mask as his chest came the closest it would ever be to happiness again; adrenaline. He stood and turned around as Techno came from the opposite direction he should have (perhaps he'd gotten lost, that would be ironic). Dream stood and watched the godling row up to the shore of the mountain and slowly begin his ascension.

He was wearing his red again, Dream noticed. He did look better in it, it suited him far more than those stupid gentle blues (Phil's touch seemed to lessen the hue of anything he came into contact with). Blue was such a soft color - it was just so wrong. Red... red was a strong, fitting color for the godling of death and war, though distantly Dream wondered just why Techno had put it back on.

The Blade took only a few minutes to reach the pinnacle of the mountain and as he towered over Dream, the masked godling took note of the emotions in those scarlet eyes.

Oh... oh, there was so much conflict hidden in that expression. There was tension in those shoulders and the pig's knuckles were white as they gripped his sword handle.

"Techno," Dream greeted cordially.

The speed at which the sword flew for him was impressive and if Dream could still feel fear he would've cried out in alarm as a dark blade was drawn and was sent flying in an arc for his neck.

A step back prevented that.

"Tech - " Dream began as he flexed his own fingers. This was always going to be the result of their meeting but Dream had been hoping for at least a bit of conversation.

The fellow godling wasn't even caring to listen. Rather rude.

Dream's fingers closed around the hilt of his ax as he pulled it out of its space pocket and threw a swing at Techno's oncoming blade.

"Hey - hey, let's talk for a moment!" Dream laughed, he let nervousness seep into his voice. Nervousness usually fed Techno's lust for blood, but a small part of Dream hoped that if the nervousness was from him that it would stall Techno, if only a moment.

There was so much to discuss.

He'd already put Phil's wings back in their proper place but Dream was willing to see how far the hybrid would go to get them back. He was willing to barter - he could be benevolent if he chose to be -

"Where is Tommy?" Techno's voice was all fire and brimstone and yet was frozen too. It was full of contradictions and the words were like acid to Dream's plans.

If he could still be surprised, he would've stumbled. Techno swung again and Dream's mind was racing too fast to prepare a counterattack so he simply dodged.

"Tommy?" he managed with a strained laugh as the sword breezed past his cheek.

Perhaps he had underestimated Techno's ability to grow attached.

"Yeah, you know; loud, annoying, the guy you kidnapped," Techno growled.

Dream hummed as he concocted a new web to spin. Clearly, Tommy's annoying little habit of worming into people's hearts worked on even the mighty Technoblade... but Dream knew Technoblade. He knew the man hated connections, he knew the man - or he thought he did. It wouldn't be hard to get the pig to let the boy go.

"Oh, don't tell me _you've_ grown to _care_ for him?" Dream offered in a taunt. "Because that would be - that would be stupid on your part."

There was no easy way to get to Techno's heart. There was no easy way to quell his bloodlust. But 'easy' was for cowards and failure was for fools, Dream was neither. He knew all those little buttons that made Techno bristle, all those pressure points to strike to make his heart lock. Technoblade was a mighty fortress, impenetrable and strong with its walls, but take those down and he was just as broken as any mortal - and not to brag, but Dream had always been good at breaching such walls.

Techno glared at him over those walls with hatred and malice masking the pain that was spread out before Dream like a portrait. Gently, Dream raised his ax and prepared to help bring that pain to light - air it out, if you will.

They danced.

Sparks flew like fireworks and their feet danced to a song that they'd grown up listening to. The steps were old memories paved into muscles and Dream thrived with it. He could imagine this was what Philza felt when he flew, free and powerful. Every drop of golden blood Dream drew with his ax was a rush of euphoria and joy that he shouldn't be able to feel. Every bite of Techno's sword was a glorious trophy to adorn his skin like new freckles brought by the sun.

If Techno was the sun, did that make Dream Icarus? Oh, it was possible and perhaps that was the reason the blood-lusting godling brought that myth up so often. Dream laughed a bit at the thought as Techno's sword grazed his side like a hungry wolf. This was addictive, every bit of it. Techno, with all his glorious prowess and strength, shone like the sun, and Dream, with his wings stolen from Philza, would never be able to reach that level...

But Dream didn't need to touch the sun. He wasn't blinded by the light, wasn't choked by hubris, so perhaps he could fly just a bit longer. He could fly until his wings were more than simple wax and feathers, he could fly until he was starlight and peace all wrapped into a shell of what he could be...

Yes... yes, he could reach that height at least. Not high enough to plummet but now low enough to fall apart.

"Is this really about Tommy?" he poised innocently enough as their blades clashed in a symphony of scraping and a show of sparks.

All he got in return was a growl.

Honestly, it was so hard to make conversation when Techno and his voices were like this. Distantly, Dream wondered what the voices thought of him at the moment... surely they were tearing him apart in a million different ways - but in which way was Techno leaning? Dream hoped the man at least was planning something poetic for his death and not a simple death by hacking and slashing. Dream deserved an execution blow at least, something metaphorical and impressive.

"I don't think it is," Dream continued nonchalantly as he scrambled out of the way of another sword blow, holding his bleeding arm.

"Tell me where he is and I can promise that I'll make it quick," Techno demanded in a low tone, it was almost soft. Oh, the poor thing - he was just a wreck under all that armor, wasn't he?

"Make it quick?" Dream's would-be laugh was cut off as his chest seized and a wound in his side screamed. "Techno... Techno, do you really think kill me is going to do anything!?"

"Seeing as I have over six-hundred-thousand people in my head screaming for your demise - yeah, yeah I think it would," Techno sneered.

Oh, there it was, the little niche in Techno's solid walls. Dream danced around the pig's blade as he started to tear them down, brick by brick.

"This isn't about Tommy, is it?" he felt like he was walking on clouds. He was flying now, without a doubt. He was free, and Techno was still rooted to the earth, tied down by all his hurt and guilt, the fruits of his connections.

Techno's swings were wilder now, exactly like a wild animal tethered to a stake. Something about it was... oddly familiar. Oh... oh, he was wild now - desperate. No... no, was it true? The last time Dream had seen this had been when he first met Techno - when the fellow godling had been desperate to get rid of his corruption and return home.

"You talk an awful lot for a man on his deathbed, any last words - any place you want to be buried? I'd usually ask if the back of your house would work, but, we both know that doesn't exist!" Techno jeered.

Such juvenile jabs. Dream wheezed as he swung his ax and watched Techno's sword slam off of it. No, no, the pig wouldn't change the conversation so easily.

"This isn't - this is _not_ about Tommy," Dream smiled. "This is about Phil."

Oh, such anger. Dream's arms buckled under the strength of Techno's next blow. There was something there, simmering just under Techno's skin, driving desperation into his attacks (Techno was rarely desperate).

They locked their weapons together and Dream strained to try and withstand the push of Techno. His feet slid, slowly but surely pushing towards the edge of the cliff. Dream searched Techno's infuriated face, he peered into those eyes of fury... and he smiled.

Because he knew those eyes... he knew this desperation. The claws in Dream's chest squeezed a bit harsher as if to affirm what Dream supposed.

"Oh? Don't tell me... don't tell me you've been corrupted because of what I did to Phil?" Dream did not change his voice, there was no false happiness or jeering - Techno deserved what was left of Dream's genuine reactions.

But there was no doubt it was true. Dream could basically see the franticness in Techno's eyes as his oath threatened to destroy him inside and out, make him rot away; poetic that they'd suffer the same affliction together.

Techno's next blow came miraculously quickly and Dream hissed as the blade carved into his shoulder. He pulled an ender pearl out from his cloak and threw it as he realized just how desperate Techno may be. The fellow godling would kill him before they finished their conversation. That would be a shame.

He landed the next mountain over and had no moment to catch his breath - Techno appeared right behind him in a shower of purple particles, sword swinging. It cut through the air, hissing with pleasure as it scraped against Dream's mask.

Dream stumbled back. He couldn't exactly afford to die right now, and not to _him_.

"Killing me won't - it won't fix it!!" Dream laughed.

"It's worth a shot," Techno growled darkly as he lunged again. Dream danced around the swings, his heart pumping a bit harder - perhaps his wings were only made of faux feathers and wax after all.

"You know it won't! You already beat me once - it's not - you're not going to get anything by doing it again!!"

Techno was growling in response, his sword swinging heavily as it tried to sink into Dream's flesh, it's blade already colored black by his blood.

"Let's think about this. _Techno_!" Dream tried to reason as the anger in his heart bloomed and his ax swung with more force than intended. Golden blood-splattered upwards as his dark ax sunk in the flesh between Techno's neck and shoulder blade. There was no time for conversation as there was something piercing Dream's leg sending warm thick blood down his leg, pooling in his boot.

They were locked together again, both of their blades lodged in the other's skin, both panting in exhaustion as they looked to one another.

"You..." Dream managed from his drying mouth, "... you don't care about Tommy - you care about Phil. And I hurt Phil. For that... I am... sorry. But don't - don't even _pretend_ this is about Tommy when he's nothing to you."

There was a growl in Techno's throat that was slowly growing in volume as Techno's eyes burned with desperation and fury.

"Maybe... maybe you're right," Techno's acceptance brought a smile to Dream's lips, temporarily breaking the grimace he had been wearing.

Techno's sword ripped out of Dream's leg and he gasped, stunned with pain for a second. His grip loosened on the ax in a moment of pure foolishness and he was sent stumbling backward as a boot connected with his stomach. He fumbled back on his bad leg and felt it give way under him like a crumbling pillar. He fell to his knee and panted, weaponless and wounded.

Foolish - he had been stupid and foolish. 

Techno still had Dream's ax in his shoulder and the warlord grimaced as he pulled it out and tossed it to the side, pure golden ichor covering his entire left side as the wound bled profusely. Then he took a step forward, and then another step. The godling of blood and pain raised his black-coated blade and Dream felt his anger desperately gnawing at the void where his fear should be.

"Techno..." Dream warned as he tried to get to his feet. He ended up only gracelessly flopping back to the ground, holding the hole in his thigh that was spewing his black blood.

Another step closer.

"Techno - wait!" Dream tried to order but the words were empty now. No - no, where was his power, where was his certainty!? Why was he trembling!? He felt no fear - he'd locked that emotion away long ago so... so why... why was he...

"Farewell Dream," Techno's smile was something deranged as he raised his sword. It would fly and Dream would be cut down yet again by this man.

There would be no joy in it this time. There would be no laughs or good-natured banter, this kill would be cold... brutal... no.... no!

"I could've killed him!" Dream's cry was a surprise to his own ears. Techno's sword stalled for a moment and so Dream continued. "I was there - I could've - it would've been easy! I could've killed Phil, but I didn't!!"

The sword swung and Dream desperately rolled to his right to avoid it.

"I spared him!" Dream's felt his throat straining and he cursed himself for how weak he was - how quickly emotion could make him fumble. "I spared him for you!"

"You think I should thank you!?" Techno demanded as he swung again. His attacks were slow now, sluggish thanks to the blood loss. Dream managed to duck away but he couldn't continue this forever.

"It would've been so easy!" Dream let malic drip in his voice as he looked to Techno. Even when he was the one on his hands and knees - he still had some power. He was not helpless! This fear was useless!! He needed to push it down - push it away!

Techno sneered.

"I didn't kill him because - because I know what he means to you," Dream continued, letting his voice get softer. "Even - even though he broke my rules and I - oh, I really did want to kill him, Techno, I did - but I didn't! I didn't for you! Would you have liked me too? I can fix that!"

"Touch Phil again, and I'll kill you as many times as I have to until you're gone forever," Techno growled, raising his sword once more.

"I won't!" Dream laughed - he could do this, he was still the one with all the power here. He could still do this! "Just make sure he stays out of my way!"

"Hurt him again and I'll - "

"Then keep him away from Tommy!" Dream spat. "You have your - your little 'Philza', so let me have Tommy."

"I don't 'have' anyone - "

"Yes, you do," Dream scolded. "You have your Phil and unless you want to be alone - because I _will_ kill him, you'll keep him out of my way."

"I think you mean you'll stay out of our way," Techno growled, his ears twitching.

"Oh come _on_ , Techno! I _know_ you!" Dream laughed - because it was true. It was the truest thing he'd said all day and Techno would know that. Techno could always tell when he wasn't bluffing.

"I highly doubt that."

"I know you're scared of losing him - I know you're corrupted now because you - you nearly lost him, and I know that if I ever get my hands on Philza again and you're a pain in my ass - I'll kill him!"

"You'll never get the chance!"

"But I _did_! I _did_ get the chance, Techno! And I'll get it again! Kill me right here, right now if you need to, but it won't change anything! How many times - how many _times_ do you have to kill me to keep Phil safe... and - and how many lives does he have!? One! One time, Techno! That's all it's gonna take!"

"It's not like I can stop him from going after Tommy!" Oh, there it was. Techno was tempted, so heartbroken and emotional - it must've been quite the show when he found Philza half-dead in the snow. It must've been so scarring for Techno that he was tempted to take the deal - tempted to step away from it all if it meant keeping his precious attachment safe. Dream would hate to see him leave the game, but he was proving to be more trouble than he was worth.

"You're smart, Techno," Dream praised. "You'll figure out how to keep him safe."

"Right now... I think that's killing you," Techno growled, taking another step forward.

"Go for it," Dream mocked as his hand slipped under his cloak and wrapped around another ender pearl. "But if you do, I'll kill him."

Techno hesitated once again. So much pain, so much _fear_. Oh, the mighty Technblade fumbling at the thought of losing his precious _friend_. It was adorable.

"I'll find him and I'll make him _scream_. I'll make it hurt - I'll make it matter," Dream vowed.

"Quiet," Techno growled.

"What will you do once he's gone?" Dream mocked. "Who - who would even care about you after he's dead other than me?"

"Quiet!" Techno snapped.

"No one! _No one_! You'll be alone! All alone! And you know the best part about that! You know the best part is that you'll be so far gone to the corruption that you'll come crawling, _crawling_ to me to try and fix it! Me!" Dream was laughing now - there was no joy or pride in it, just some sick empty feeling in his chest and the feasting corruption that kept him moving.

Techno was startingly quiet and that brought a smile to Dream's face.

"I know... I know exactly what scares you, Techno," Dream taunted. "You're scared - scared of being alone. Alone forever. Trapped forever in your own mind."

He saw Techno's knuckles grow white as they clenched the handle of his blade. Dream clenched the pearl in his hand and let his eyes wander the space behind Technoblade. Should he pearl for the sea or ... no, no the trees were his best bet.

"I won't let you hurt Phil again," Techno growled.

"There you go," Dream praised falsely. "Go keep Phil safe - but stay out of my way and stay away from Tommy, we both know you only cared about him because Philza did. Go home, tend to poor Philza - and stay _out of my way_."

"No," Techno growled darkly, raising his sword. "This is for Phil."

Well, this wasn't exactly unexpected, but still disappointing. Dream had been hoping he could at least convince Techno to stand down, but he'd take the smaller victories.

"Naturally," Dream murmured solemnly as he looked up at that gleaming blade. "As long as we're in agreement that this was all for Phil... not Tommy. _I_ care for Tommy in my own way, _you_ care for Phil with yours. As long as we - if we stay away from what belongs to the other, maybe we can stop fighting."

"... Maybe," Techno's small agreement was hardly louder than a breath, something that Dream wasn't even meant to hear, but he heard it. He heard it and it made victory bloom in Dream's chest as the sword arced downward, singing for his blood. He was laughing - that was a little strange but he was already throwing the pearl and laughing about his small triumph as Techno's sword grazed his neck.

Then he was teleported to the trees and was limping along with cackles on his tongue and blood in his shoes.

He had been right! Techno didn't care for Tommy, if he ever had, he didn't anymore! Techno had agreed that Tommy was _Dream's_. Yes, yes Tommy belonged to Dream and even Technoblade had acknowledged it! And to top it all off, Techno was corrupted! He would be lusting for violence soon, desperate to fulfill his oath.... oh, this was making for an interesting playing field.

There was a roar of anger in the distance but Dream only laughed as he limped along, pearling away once again with wheezes in his lungs. Techno would never catch him now.

He had won. It was only a matter of time now.

He limped all the way back to the prison with a smile on his lips, his feet light, and his chest soaring despite his inability to feel happiness. He limped all the way to Tommy's cell and entered to find the boy resting in the corner.

Immediately all of the firey feelings in his veins died away and the empty useless emotion that came with the fight was extinguished, as it should be.

He was gentle as he approached and crouched down before his new prize. He gently brushed the messy hair out of the boy's eyes and cradled Tommy's gentle face with his hand, he was bruising from their last scuffle. The blues blooming on the boy's skin were ugly and dark but the boy had earned them, he'd put up such a fight even half-drugged. So young, so promising. As Dream's fingers brushed against Tommy's face, they left the residue of his latest fight, gold and black blood that spread out on the boy's light complexion like war paint. Dream laughed a bit to see it and felt his chest relax.

A regen potion would get rid of the boy's painful bruising...

"We're going to do great things together," he murmured to the unconscious boy as his mind raced to make a checklist of what he needed to do next. It was all falling together so wonderfully that Dream couldn't risk messing it up now. All of his focus now needed to rest with Tommy. 

"Just you wait and see."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys! Guys I finally mapped out the story! I know what's gonna happen now! I have a plan! Are you proud of me?  
> lol, I know Dream's perspective is a bit wonky so if anything is confusing just ask. He's just really fucked up right now, don't worry, there is a plan!
> 
> Also - in this the prison isn't completed, hence no wall of lava yet, but don't worry, that's coming.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, hope y'all liked the chapter. I hope to update soon! Thanks so much for reading and have a great day/night!
> 
> If you notice anything I should change in the tags or anything I can fix in the story itself feel free to comment. This is my first time using Archives and... well... I'm a newb. Thanks again!


End file.
